安迪结婚卡罗琳故作大方

People, I have huge news!
各位 我有个大消息宣布
Who's carrying the rest of it in?
"大"的部分是由谁带来呢
I found a way to improve diner business,
我找到了能促进生意的方法
and the crazy part is I don't have to fire you two.
更疯狂的是 居然不用炒了你俩
Are you gonna clean that dead body smell
你打算要打扫女厕
out of the ladies' room?
清掉里面的死人味了吗
No, that's what plug-in Glade is for.
不是 买芳香剂不就是为了这个吗
Okay, remember how that ice bucket challenge
大家还记得之前的慈善冰桶挑战
caught on with celebrities?
因为艺人们而爆红吗
Han, people did those challenges for ALS,
阿憨 大家做那个挑战是为了帮助渐冻人症
not to get publicity for a diner that Yelp calls,
不是点评网上被称为"纯凭运气"的
"A bit of a dice roll."
餐厅拿来骗人气用的
Well, I've invented the condiment challenge.
我发明了调味料挑战
Why, 'cause condoms are a challenge
为啥 是因为使用保险套[音似调味料]
to you and other virgins?
对你跟其他小处♥男来说 难度太高吗
Earl, you're on fire!
厄尔 吐得一口好槽啊
I'm gonna down ketchup and mustard
我要灌下番茄酱与黄芥末酱
and then nominate Mr. George Clooney.
然后再点名演员乔治·克鲁尼先生
If you really want this thing to go viral,
如果你真的想这事爆红
I happen to know that Clooney likes him some spicy sriracha.
我刚好知道克鲁尼喜欢"是拉差辣椒酱"
All I know is that anal is hot.
我只知道爆菊很火♥辣
His wife's name is Amal, not anal.
人家的老婆是叫宝菊 不叫爆菊
I still stand by my statement.
我还是支持我刚才的论点
Action!
开拍
Otherwise known as, "Let's get this over with."
又或者是所谓的"赶紧弄完了事吧"
Mr. George...
乔治先生
Uh-oh! I... hot!
好辣
Too hot!
太辣了
I actually think that could go viral.
我觉得这短片还真可能会爆红呢
Damn! I hit the wrong thing.
靠 我按错按钮了
Han! Han, do over!
阿憨 再重拍一次
My insides are on fire!
我身体里面像烧起来啦
I love Wednesdays.
我好喜欢星期三
I get to erase all the genitalia
因为我可以把别人
that was drawn on the cupcake board.
画在我们小蛋糕黑板上的鸡鸡全擦掉
And I love Thursdays 'cause I get to redraw them.
我喜欢星期四 因为我又能重新画上鸡鸡
I need some more paper towels.
我需要多一点纸巾
Oh, I think they're downstairs.
多的好像在楼下吧
Max, you do fake stairs so well.
麦克斯 你好会演假装下楼梯
I know.
我知道
It's the second best thing I fake.
这是我"假"得第二好的事
Hey, isn't that Andy?
那不是安迪吗
My Andy?
我那个安迪吗
Oh, God, it is Candy Andy.
天啊 还真是糖果安迪
He's coming over here.
他要过来这边了
Hey, Max. Wow.
你好啊 麦克斯
Your chalkboard has really nice legs.
你黑板的美♥腿我可以玩好久啊
- Hey. - I know, so silly.
-好啊 -我知道很傻
It's just I'm not very good at seeing my exes.
我只是不太擅长见到我的前男友们
Yeah, or hiding.
你也很不擅长躲
How's the candy business?
你糖果生意怎么样了
Sour? Nutty? Full of Nerds?
"酸"溜溜 疯颠颠[坚果] 宅男多[糖果品牌]吗
It's great. Candy's not going anywhere,
很不错啊 糖果们也不会跑掉
like my grandma's knee fat.
就像我奶奶膝盖上的肥肉一样
So you guys still over at the diner?
你们俩还在那间餐厅打工吗
We aren't still at the diner.
人家才没有还在那间餐厅上工呢
This is our cupcake window.
这里可是我们的小蛋糕橱窗
Uh, hello?
姐两位
Your shift at the diner started five minutes ago!
你们五分钟前就该到餐厅开工了
Okay, we're still at the diner too.
好啦 我们也还在餐厅工作
We're here, we're there, we're all over.
这里 那里 到处都有我们
Like herpes?
就像疱疹
- Nice. - Yeah.
-接得好 -妙哉
So what brings you over here
今日是什么风把你吹来
besides obviously stalking your ex-girlfriend?
除了摆明是来偷窥前女友之外
Actually, I'm looking for a flower shop.
其实我是来附近找花店的
Oh, flowers for a girl you never got over?
给你一直忘不了的女人送花吗
Uh, no, for my fiance.
不是 是给我未婚妻的
Did he just say Beyonce?
他刚才说了碧昂丝[音似]吗
Actually, I'm getting married.
其实我要结婚了
Cool.
行
Caroline, I'm sorry.
卡洛琳 抱歉
I was gonna call you and tell you,
我有想过打给你 告诉你这事
but then I felt like maybe you wouldn't care.
但我又想 也许你根本懒得知道
You know, I mean, it's been a long time.
毕竟我们分手也好长一段时日了
I hope you're not hurt.
希望没伤到你心
Hurt? I'm hurt.
伤心 我当然伤心啦
Hurt that you didn't ask me and Max to do your wedding cake!
因为你没找我跟麦克斯做婚礼蛋糕而伤心
Oh, God. I'll be downstairs.
我去 我还是先下楼了
Well, yeah.
好吧
Actually, Romy and I haven't decided on a cake yet.
其实罗米跟我还没决定要哪个蛋糕
You know, she's pretty busy. She runs her own business.
她满忙的 她自己经营个生意
"The Business Bride."
"商界新娘"呀
Wasn't that Katherine Heigl's last movie?
这不是凯瑟琳·海格尔上一部电影的情节吗
The one that brought her back to TV?
就是把她踢回电视圈的那部烂片
知名女演员 出演过许多电视剧与电影
Max, can you please come back upstairs?
麦克斯 你可以回来楼上了吗
I'm waiting for the elevator!
我在等电梯上楼呢
Is that Candy Andy?
这不是糖果安迪吗
Well, well.
哎哟哟
You two getting back together again?
你们俩又重修旧好了吗
- Oh, I'm getting married. - To someone else.
-我要结婚了 -新娘不是她
Oh, Lord, this is why I don't like to be outside.
我去 这就是为什么我不爱出来外面
Well, I gotta run.
好了 我得先滚了
Not really. I'll be walking away.
也不是真滚 我会走掉
But if you're serious about the cake...
如果你刚才说蛋糕的事情是认真的
So serious.
超级无敌认真
Major ser-I-osity!
认真到爆炸
In fact, it's our wedding gift to you.
其实 这就当我们送给你的新婚礼物吧
- Oh, God. - Max, stop.
-我靠 -麦克斯 省省吧
There is no downstairs.
明明就没有楼下
Yeah, it's not possible to get any lower than this.
因为节操已经触底到下不去了
Okay, well...
好吧 那...
how about I text you after I talk to Romy?
我跟罗米谈过之后给你发消息吧
It was great seeing you, Caroline.
很高兴再次见到你 卡洛琳
You too, Max.
你也是 麦克斯
You guys are gonna watch my butt as I walk away, right?
我慢慢走掉时 你们会盯着我的小翘臀吧
You gonna make it clap for daddy?
你的两片屁屁会为大爷拍"屁"叫好吗
I cannot make it clap, but I can make it go, "Whoo!"
拍屁是没办法了 但我可以让它来一下
Um, couple things.
几件事情
One, he's still hot.
一 他还是很帅
And two, are you insane?
二 你是不是疯啦
You want us to do your ex-boyfriend's wedding cake?
你想我们给你的前男友做婚礼蛋糕吗
Max, I broke up with him. Remember?
麦克斯 是我甩了他的 还记得吗
I'm a mature, evolved, sophisticated,
我可是个成熟世故 见过风浪
sexy but not in your face about it woman.
带有低调性感的女人
I can handle this.
我能行
I think it's a bad idea.
我觉得这主意烂透了
And I know bad ideas. I was one.
烂主意我特了解 我就是别人生的"烂
主意"
I...
是
broke up... with him.
老娘 甩了 他
Dramatic... talking...
戏剧化的 说话方式
is... annoying.
超 欠扁
How's it going there, hot stuff?
还好吗 火♥辣帅哥
Is your tongue working?
你的舌头好使了吗
I'm gonna think of another video to go viral
我得再想另一个能爆红的影片内容
to set this place on fire, and if not,
来让这里生意红红火火 如果还不行
I'll eventually have to set this place on fire.
总有天我得把这店一把火烧到红红火火
Either way, I'm not giving up.
无论如何 我决不放弃
You tell your clothes that?
你有跟你的衣服这么说吗
'Cause they didn't get the memo.
它们感觉都放弃治疗了
Get this. Andy says that he and Romy
听我说 安迪说他跟罗米
would love to meet us to talk about wedding cakes
很乐意跟我们见面谈婚礼蛋糕的事
at their loft in Manhattan.
去它们曼哈顿的阁楼公寓谈
Queen Romy has summoned us
罗米皇后宣召我们两位草民
to a cake tasting at their loft!
进公寓城堡谈试吃蛋糕事宜呢
Uh, can I borrow your phone for a sec?
我能借用一下你的手机吗
There. I deleted his text.
好了 我删了他的短信
I deleted his number.
删了他的号码
I also deleted my number.
还顺便把我的号码也删了
We aren't doing this. You are not that cool.
我们不接这活儿 你没这么大度
Everyone knows that.
全世界都知道
You're not. Cool girls don't freak out
你真不是 酷妹们才不会因为
when you cop a feel in the freezer.
在冷冻库里被人摸♥奶就吓到
You know his number by heart.
你心里会默背他的号码
This has nothing to do with my heart.
这跟我心里没有关系
It's business. I broke up with him.
这是纯生意往来 是我甩了他
It's like you don't know that I broke up with him.
你怎么感觉好像不知道是我甩了他啊
I broke up with him. Didn't know if you caught that
是我甩了他 不知道你刚才有没听到
'cause my back was to you.
因为我刚才背对你
Hey, everybody!
大家安安
Good news!
好消息宣布
My baby was delivered today.
我的宝宝今日送到[出生]啦
Oh, my God!
我的老天爷啊
Did I black out for nine months again?
我又断片九个月了吗
The baby didn't come out of my box, Earl.
厄尔 这个宝宝不是从我下面出来的
It came out of this one.
是从这盒里出来的
Wow, you can really get anything on Amazon.
这年头网上购物真是啥都能买啊
It's called a "Maybe Baby."
这个叫"或许宝宝"
While Oleg and I are trying to get pregnant,
在我一边跟奥列格试图怀孩子的这会
we're gonna use it to practice for the real thing.
我们打算用这个来为之后的孩子做练习
So you're having a key-section?
所以你这是"剖盒产"吗
Strangely, this is not the weirdest birth
奇怪的是 这并不是我在这家餐厅
we've seen at the diner.
见过最怪的一次生小孩
Do you like him?
你喜欢他吗
Weren't you the baby in "American Sniper"?
你不是电影《美国狙击手》里的那个假娃娃吗
Yeah, it's got a computer inside to keep track
他里面有个小型电脑
of our parenting skills.
给我们带孩子的技术打分
And if we get a score of over 92,
如果我们能得到超过92分
we get 20% at Papa John's.
我们去棒约翰披萨店能打8折
Any Papa John's!
任何分店呢
Well, you're having a fake baby for all the right reasons.
你弄假婴儿的理由 全都太"正确"了
The baby's here?
宝宝到了吗
Aww, you're a father. Think fast!
你的父亲 快接
Our first father-son catch.
我们首次父子玩抛接
Let's get to know each other...
我们来了解一下彼此
"Bob"?
"鲍伯"
All they had left were the white babies.
他们只剩下白人孩子
The single actresses over 40 snap up all the minorities.
40岁以上的单身女演员把少数种族全抢了
Hey, Max.
麦克斯
Could you maybe babysit my Maybe Baby tomorrow?
或许你明日愿意照看我的或许宝宝吗
You know, 'cause I-I really need some me time.
因为我真的很需要一点私人的时间
Fine. 20 bucks an hour.
行 20块一小时
Extra in case he orders some adult movies
如果他点播了我想看很久的成♥人电影
I've been wanting to see.
那我得加收一点
Okay, Max, wash your fancy sweatpants.
麦克斯 洗好你的上档次运动裤
We are confirmed for Andy and Romy's
我们已经确定好明日要去让
wedding cake tasting for tomorrow.
安迪与罗米试吃婚礼蛋糕了
Andy? You mean that cute guy
安迪 你是说那个
that you ruined your relationship with?
感情被你给搅黄的小帅哥吗
Sophie, it wasn't the right relationship.
苏菲 那段恋情并不适合
He didn't support my career.
他不支持我的事业
The cupcake thing?
小蛋糕那玩意儿吗
Pickup!
上菜
Like father like son.
有其父必有其子啊
Thank you guys so much for coming.
你们大老远过来真是太谢谢你们了
These cakes look so lovely.
这些蛋糕看起来好棒
They are.
的确很赞
Really nice place you got here.
你这屋子很不错啊
I noticed there was a door on the bathroom.
我注意到了你们的浴室有门
I don't want to brag, but check out all the outlets we got.
我不想炫耀 但是你去看看我们家的插座
Lot of power. Two-prong, three-prong.
电力十足 双头 三头
You got one of those weird European plugs?
甚至如果你有欧洲那种奇怪的插头
Bring it.
欢迎带过来用
How funny is he?
他是不是很有趣
Oh, the funniest.
对啊 他最有趣了
Oh, God.
我的天啊
So, Romy, it looks like you travel a lot.
罗米 你好像常常旅游啊
I love all your...
我很喜欢你各种...
Objet d'art.
小古玩[法语]
Oh, God.
要了亲命
I'm a hat designer, so I go to Malaysia
我是个帽子设计师 我常会去马来西亚
and Sri Lanka a lot for materials.
以及斯里兰卡去弄材料
I'm poor, so I go to McDonald's and Taco Bell a lot
我是个穷鬼 我常会去麦当劳与塔可钟
for my meals.
去吃便宜餐点
Oh, show 'em one of your hats, Romes.
罗米 给她们看一顶你的帽子
The purple one Pippa Middleton wore in "Star" Magazine.
就是八卦杂志上那位社交名媛戴着的紫帽子
Oh! Pippa Middleton, wow.
社交名媛啊
She was up for a job on "The Today Show,"
她本来有机会在《今日秀》得到工作呢
but she didn't get it.
可惜她最后没得到
Andy, they don't want to see my hats.
安迪 她们才没兴趣看我设计的帽子呢
Oh, Andy wants us to see your hats.
安迪想我们看你的帽子
Let's see your hats.
那就看你的帽子吧
Oh, this guy was there when no one believed in me,
他在没人愿意相信我的时候支持我
and he supported me in every way,
各方面都为我撑腰
and now I'm in over a hundred department stores worldwide.
现在我的作品在全球上百家百货都有
Worldwide?
全球吗
That is wide.
真是太全了
You know the tasting is for them, right?
你知道今天是他们试吃吧
Come on, let 'em see what you do.
来嘛 让她们看看
Sorry, I'm a proud fiance.
抱歉 我很为我未婚妻感到自豪
It's a little unmanly, but it's m'thing.
虽然有点娘 但我就是这样
Ooh, I'll go get Black Dahlia.
我去取黑色大丽花那顶
Max will like that one.
麦克斯会喜欢那顶
You okay?
你还好吧
Absolutely.
当然啦
We didn't work out, you found someone great,
我们感情没成 你找到了别的很棒的人
supported her business, and now you're getting married.
支持她的事业 现在还要结婚了
Pretty sure he meant, "Are you choking?"
我蛮确定他是问"你没噎着吧"
Yup, that's where I was headed.
是的 我的确是在问这个
Caroline, you broke up with me.
卡洛琳 是你跟我分手的
She broke up with you?
她跟你提分手的吗
I hadn't heard that.
我没听过这事呢
See? All bitter... better.
看 太有事 没事了
Max, do you want to try it on?
麦克斯 你想戴戴看吗
Ahem, she doesn't need a hat.
她不需要帽子啦
Romes said I could have the sweet hat!
罗米说我可以戴美帽
Oh, it looks adorable on her. You should have it.
你戴真是太好看了 这顶送你吧
What is this, a hat tasting now?
这是啥 试吃帽子吗
Well, it's not a cupcake tasting anymore
反正不是试吃小蛋糕
'cause you ate them all.
因为全被你吃完了
You guys are hilarious. I don't need to taste those.
你们俩真是太有意思了 我不需要试吃啦
You and Max are a part of Andy's past,
你跟麦克斯都是安迪过去的一部分
and I would honored if you'd do our cake
能请你们为我们做蛋糕
and come to the wedding as our guests.
并且出席我们婚礼将会是我的荣幸
Oh, that is a great idea. Hey, there will be a lot
这主意很棒 到时会有很多
of self-destructive man-children there.
自毁前程又长不大的男人在场
Max, feels like your kind of party.
麦克斯 感觉派对上都会是你的菜
And it's on this awesome yacht.
而且是在一艘很棒的游艇上举办
You know, technically it's not a yacht
其实不是什么船都能称为游艇
unless it's over 40 feet.
除非它超过12米以上
Is it? Okay.
超过了吗 好吧
Come on. It'll be fun.
来嘛 会很好玩的
Gah! I don't know.
我不知道
And I'm not really into fun.
我这人不太爱玩
You know, I've had fun and it's not that fun.
我已经玩过太多 也没那么好玩啦
Got it. What was I thinking?
懂了 我想什么呢
Be weird for you, Caroline, right?
对你来说会很怪吧 卡洛琳
Weird?
怪什么
Weird if we didn't come!
我们不来才怪呢
Oh, God.
我了个老天爷啊
Look at this, Max.
麦克斯 你看
Cupcakes and candy.
小蛋糕与糖果
This could have been me and Andy's cake.
这本来可以是我与安迪的婚礼蛋糕呢
Our perfect cake for our perfect marriage.
我们完美婚礼的完美婚礼蛋糕
No marriage is perfect... except Ice-T and Coco.
天下无完美的婚姻 除了那对模特与饶
舌歌手
Now, he's not perfect.
他才不完美呢
You broke up with him for a reason.
你会跟他分手是有原因的
Andy's out there now. Come here.
安迪现在就在隔壁 你过来
Music at a wedding? How original.
婚礼放音乐 太有"创意"了
Oh, there he is.
他就在那里
He looks so handsome in a tuxedo.
他穿燕尾服的样子真的好帅
Calm down. So does Jane Lynch.
冷静点好吗 简·林奇穿也帅啊
知名女演员 短发 常演出犀利的角色
He's not perfect. Look, there.
他才不完美呢 你看他
He's going in for a nose pick.
他准备要挖鼻孔了
No, just a scratch.
没有 只是抓个痒
He has such nice hands. Big hands.
他的手也好好看 好大的一双手
And there's gonna be a ring on it soon.
可是手上马上要被套上结婚戒指了
He's looking over here! Oh, oh!
他看过来了
- He can't see me cry! - Okay, come on.
-不能让他看到我哭 -来
Think of something bad about him.
想想他的缺点
Think, think, think, think, think.
快想快想快想
Uh... he always took too long to finish during sex!
做♥爱的时候 他总是要超久才完事
Oh, wait. That's a good thing.
等等 这是个优点啊
It is? All right, come on.
是咩 好吧 来
There had to be something terribly wrong
你们感情中肯定是有哪里
with that relationship.
大错特错
There was. That I ended it.
有的 就是我结束了这段感情
I kicked the perfect guy for me out of my life.
我把完美的那人从我生命中踢走
Yup, here come the tears.
我的眼泪要下来了
And here comes Andy!
安迪也要过来了
Uh, do you have a bathroom? Oh!
这里有厕所吗
Hey! Thought I saw you guys peeking out of here.
我就觉得好像看到了你们俩在这边偷看
So you guys act weird everywhere?
所以你们俩是到哪都怪里怪气的吗
Yup, that's our signature.
没错 这是我们的招牌
Got us bounced out of Six Flags.
害我们去主题公园时被赶出来
Where's Caroline?
卡洛琳呢
The pretty ladies' room.
上美♥女厕了
So it looks like you're getting married
看来你要结婚了啊
to Not Caroline.
跟"非卡洛琳"
How's she doing?
她还好吗
I'm getting the feeling this has been hard for her.
我感觉她来婚礼好像挺难受
Temperature check.
测测温度
Okay, I don't understand.
我不太懂你什么意思
Are you asking me to bend over?
是要我撅起屁♥股量肛温吗
What if Caroline thought she might have made a
mistake
要是卡洛琳觉得自己犯了错误
by breaking up with you? Would you consider being
不该跟你分手 你会愿意考虑
a runaway groom and giving it another shot with her?
当逃跑新郎 再给你们俩感情一次机会吗
Just a thought.
只是个想法而已
Well, I guess I'd have to say it's too late.
我得告诉你 一切为时已晚
I'm getting married to Romy. I love her.
我要跟罗米结婚了 我爱她
So that's a firm no?
所以是确定不可能啦
Uh, Max.
麦克斯
All yours now.
您请便
How about we pretend like none of this happened
我们就假装没听到刚才的话
and you guys come watch me get married, okay?
你们俩等会出来看我成婚 好吗
Andy, wait.
安迪 等等
I'm sorry.
对不起
I really am happy for you.
我真心为你感到开心
Go live your life. I wish you well.
去过你的人生 我愿你一生幸福
Thank you. That means a lot to me.
谢谢 你这话对我意义非凡
I really did love you.
我真的曾经爱过你
I know.
我知道
Even though you broke up with me.
虽然你与我分了手
Yeah, even though I broke up with you.
是啊 虽然我与你分了手
I did it. I didn't cry.
我做到了 我没哭
Max, what's wrong?
麦克斯 怎么了
You could have had it all!
你本来可以拥有一切美好的
Max, I've never seen you cry.
麦克斯 我从来没见你哭过
I'm sorry, but maybe he was the perfect guy!
对不起 但或许他就是那完美的人
And he loved you! You heard him!
而且他爱过你 你听到他说的了
Max, it's okay. Nobody gets it all.
麦克斯 没事的 没人能拥有一切美好
Max, turn around and look at me.
麦克斯 转过来看着我
No, I don't want you to see me cry.
不要 我不想你看见我哭
Max, turn around.
麦克斯 转过来
This hat doesn't even work!
这帽子的遮挡功能就是个屁
Oh, hey, I was just looking for the bathroom.
你们好 我想找一下厕所
I wanted to get stoned before Andy got hitched.
我想在安迪结婚之前先嗨一发
You got some love for me and my friend here?
有多余的大♥麻分享给我们吗
We need it.
我们也需要来一发
They put candy on Andy's wedding cake?
做蛋糕的人在安迪蛋糕上放趟过了吗
Brutal, dude.
太狠毒了吧 兄弟
Why is it brutal, dude?
为什么狠毒啊 兄弟
'Cause of the bald spot where I ate the gumdrops?
因为我偷吃掉糖果的那块像圆形秃吗
No, I mean with Andy's business in the toilet.
不是 是因为安迪的生意吃屎了
Andy's business is in the toilet?
安迪的生意吃屎倒闭了吗
Yeah, he had to close it down, but it's cool.
是啊 关门大吉了 但没事的
Romy's, like, loaded now.
罗米现在富得流油
I can't believe Andy didn't tell me
真不敢相信安迪居然没告诉我
his business was in the toilet.
他的生意倒闭了
Oh, bummer.
真扫兴
Looks like I gotta do this wedding thing sobes.
看来我得清醒着参加这婚礼了
As long as it's not me, right?
但只要不是我要结婚就好了
That stoner, who I can easily see
那个我能清晰看见等会
having very sloppy sex with later,
我将跟他草率来一发的瘾君子
just saved the day 'cause now we know Andy lied to you.
拯救了今天 因为我们知道了安迪骗你
And I wouldn't want to be with someone who can't be honest.
而我怎么会想要跟骗我的男人在一起呢
See? He is so not perfect.
你看 他才不完美呢
You so would not have had it all.
跟他在一起才不会拥有一切美好呢
- Caroline. - Andy?
-卡洛琳 -安迪
I'm kind of in a hurry but I think you should know something.
我有点急 但我觉得有件事该跟你说
I lost my business.
我失去了我的生意
I didn't want to tell you because I was too proud.
我没告诉你是因为我太骄傲
I wanted you to think my life was perfect, and it's not.
我想你觉得我的生活一切完美 但并不是
I mean, it's great, but it's not perfect.
我生活挺好 但绝不完美
Okay, I gotta go get married. See you out there.
好了 我得去结婚了 我们婚礼上见
All right, so he's perfect.
好吧 他是完美的
I guess I'm not taking this dress back
看来我这件裙子是不能再拿回去退货了
'cause we're swimming home.
因为我们要游回家
We're not swimming.
我们才不游泳
We're gonna take the "I hate my life" boat.
我们要坐"恨我这一生艇"回家
Um, big news.
大新闻
Andy and Romy are in Mexico for their honeymoon.
安迪与罗米去墨西哥度蜜月
Weather forecast?
而天气预报呢
Cloudy with a chance of diarrhea.
多云并有几率拉稀
Um, can I borrow that for a sec?
我能借用你手机一下吗
Oh, you're on her Instagram.
你在看她的照片分享网啊
Cute. Good-bye.
真有爱 再见
You unfollowed her?
你帮我取消关注她了吗
Now it's gonna look like I'm jealous
现在我看起来就像嫉妒人家
and can't handle their happiness.
受不了看到人家晒幸福
Ya can't!
你就是受不了啊
Hey, everybody! Look!
大家 快看
I got our report card back from the Maybe Baby people!
我从或许宝宝机构的人那边收到成绩单了
We passed the test!
我们合格了
We're gonna be solid "C" parents!
我们会是很棒的丙级父母
Well, that's a better grade than the diner got.
丙级也比我们这家餐厅的评比高分了
I'm gonna miss that little guy.
我会想念那个小家伙的
What I'm not gonna miss is fighting it
但我绝对不会想念
to get to Sophie's boob.
跟他抢苏菲奶♥子的这事
Okay, people.
好了各位
Are you leaving?
你要走了吗
I hope it was something I said.
希望是因为我说的某句话让你想走
Well, I have a video that is sure to go viral.
我有个短片点子 绝对能爆红
I'm gonna stuff myself in this suitcase
我要把自己塞进这个行李箱
for the Williamsburg Diner challenge.
来响应威廉斯堡餐厅挑战
Caroline, you film it this time.
卡洛琳 这次由你来拍
Max, you zip me up.
麦克斯 你来帮我拉上拉链
And I thought I'd be the first one to die here.
我一直以为我会是餐厅里第一个死的人呢
I, Han Lee, nominate Mr. George Clooney
我 李憨 点名乔治·克鲁尼先生
to the Williamsburg Diner challenge
来参加威廉斯堡餐厅挑战
of packing yourself in a suitcase.
来把自己塞进行李箱中
I'm also a fan of "The Men Who Stare At Goats."
我还是他的电影《以眼杀人》的粉丝哦
Let 'er zip, Max!
拉上吧 麦克斯
Han... consider this my birthday present.
阿憨 这就当你送我的生日礼物吧
I got my Papa John's gift certificate.
我拿到棒约翰披萨店的礼物折价卷了
Mama Sophie wants to buy pizza for everyone!
苏菲妈妈要请大家吃披萨
Well, now is as good a time as any.
上班时间跟其他时间都一样方便
Hello?
有人在吗
Are you filming? Hello?
你在拍吗 在吗
Don't tell George Clooney!
别告诉乔治·克鲁尼
Anyone? Are you filming?
有人在吗 在拍吗