了不起的麦瑟尔夫人（2017）

♪ I have always been a woman who arranges things ♪
♪ For the pleasure and the profit it derives ♪
♪ I have always been a woman who arranges things ♪
♪ Like furniture ♪
♪ And daffodils ♪
♪ And lives... ♪
♪ If you want your sister courted ♪
♪ Brother wed, or cheese imported ♪
♪ Just leave everything to me ♪
♪ If you want your roof inspected ♪
♪ Eyebrows tweezed, or bills collected ♪
♪ Just leave everything to me ♪
♪ If you want your daughter dated ♪
♪ Or some marriage consummated for a rather modest fee... ♪
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？我这就帮您转接
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call? I will connect you.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接 -B阿特曼
I will connect you. - B. Altman.
我该帮您转接哪里？我这就帮您转接
Where may I direct your call? I will connect you.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
太多来电了 我不行了！
Aah! Too many calls. I can't!
稍等 我这就帮您转接
Hold on! I will connect you.
♪ Just leave everything to me ♪
♪ If you want your culture rounded... ♪
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
把头插在两腿间 -好
Head between your knees.
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
乱了！我乱了！
Twisted! I'm twisted!
♪ The whole procedure... ♪
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
呼吸 亲爱的 呼吸
Breathe, honey, breathe.
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
米琪 帮我！
Midge, help!
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
米琪 帮我！
Midge, help!
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接
I will connect you.
你会以为我们在发放 帕特布恩的演唱会门票
Whew! You'd think we were giving away Pat Boone tickets.
天啊 你太棒了
Gosh. You're amazing.
我已经练了好久了
I've had a lot of practice.
试试在星期五免费化妆日 在露华浓柜台卖♥♥货吧
Try manning the Revlon counter on a Free Makeover Friday.
化妆品专柜？-对
Makeup counter? - Yup.
你以前抛头露面 -是什么样的？
You were in the show. - What's it like?
我听说有音乐 -还有午餐休息
I hear there's music. - And lunch breaks.
还有空气 -都有 还有更多
And air. - It is all of that and more.
听起来就像天堂
Sounds like heaven.
是啊
It was.
那你怎么到这儿来了？
So, how come you landed here?
我遇到了困难
I hit a rough patch.
我跟一个叫彭妮的人发生了点事
There was an incident named Penny.
底线是 我不是烂货
Bottom line is, I am not a tramp
有一天我会回到那个柜台的
and someday I'm gonna be back at that counter.
但在那之前…
But until then...
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？ 我这就帮您转接
B. Altman. Where may I connect your call?
♪ To... ♪
♪ Me! ♪
神奇的梅赛尔太太
滚开！
Fuck off.
喂？
Yeah?
嗨 您是苏西梅尔森吗？
Hi. Is this Susie Myerson?
不是 -那我能跟苏西梅尔森说话吗？
No. - Well, can I speak with Susie Myerson?
为什么？ -我是莫里斯阿布拉姆森
Why? - I'm Morris Abramson.
我是宾夕法尼亚州的经纪人
I'm a booker out of Pennsylvania.
我想聊聊她的一个客户
I'd like to talk about a client of hers.
是 我就是苏西梅尔森
Oh. Oh. Yes. This is Susie Myerson.
你刚才说你叫什么？
Uh, what did you say your name was?
阿布拉姆森 莫里斯阿布拉姆森
Uh, Abramson. Morris Abramson.
莫里斯 很高兴认识你
Morris, nice to meet you.
嘿 顺便问一句 你从哪得知这个号♥码？
Uh, hey, wh-where did you get this number, by the way?
从你给我的名片上
Uh, from the card you gave me?
你开玩笑 那成了？
You're kidding. That worked?
对啊 听着 我对你的女孩很感兴趣 梅赛尔太太
Yes. Listen, I'm interested in your girl... Mrs. Maisel.
是 她现在很火的
Mm. Yeah, she's hot right now.
我听说了她跟兰尼布鲁斯的表演
I heard about the show she did with Lenny Bruce.
对 表现很棒 一个明星诞生了
Oh, yeah, great show. A star was born.
我想问一下她二月份有空吗
Well, I was wondering what her availabilities are in February.
哇 天啊 我真希望你这电♥话♥是两周前
Oh, wow. Boy, I wish you'd called a week ago
我答应里诺的那些人之前打的
before I said yes to those two weeks in Reno,
但我尽力吧
but I'll see what I can do.
稍等 我把预约本拿来
Uh, hold on. Let me get my book.
糟糕 我得弄个预约本
Shit, I got to get a book.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接 安妮德
I will connect you. Enid.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接 多丽丝
I will connect you. Doris.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接 金杰
I will connect you. Ginger.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
我这就帮您转接 米琪
I will connect you. Midge.
B阿特曼 我该帮您转接哪里？
B. Altman. Where may I direct your call?
接到你屁♥股♥上
Right up your ass.
你心情不错啊
You're in a good mood.
是的 嘿 为什么那里每个女孩听起来都像
I am. Hey, why does every girl there sound
刚被踢了老二的男人？
like a guy who's just been kicked in the nuts?
你想干吗 苏西？
What do you want, Susie?
我想告诉你成功了
I want to tell you it worked.
什么成了？-名片 名片成功了！
What worked? - The card. The card worked.
我发名片的一个人打电♥话♥了 他想要你
One of the guys that I gave it to called. He wants you.
不是为了手♥淫♥ 他想预订你去费城的
Not just for a hand job. He wants to book you in
一个俱乐部表演 -真的？
a goddamn club in Philadelphia! - Really?
当然
Fuckin' A.
对 还有两个电♥话♥
Yeah. Two other calls came in also.
报纸那边打过来的 他们都听说了兰尼布鲁斯的表演
Newspapers. They heard all about the Lenny Bruce gig,
他们想全面了解你
and they want to know all about you.
我们渡过难关了 姐妹儿
We have gotten over the hump, sister.
重组开始了
The rebuilding has begun.
费城 哇 好兴奋了
Philadelphia. Wow. That's exciting.
不 才不了 费城没什么好让人兴奋的
No, it's not. There's nothing exciting about Philadelphia.
我还从来没去过那儿呢 我一直想去
Well, I've never been, and I've always wanted to go.
带个铃铛走第六大道 那就是费城
Take Sixth Avenue, add a bell, that's Philadelphia.
我觉得不太确切
I don't think that's accurate.
米琪 你又有一个电♥话♥
Midge, you got another call.
一个十分恐慌的人打的
Some guy in a total panic.
我必须继续工作了
I have to go back to work.
B阿特曼 我是米琪
B. Altman. This is Midge.
米里亚姆 你回来需要多久？
Miriam, how long will it take you to get here?
两个半小时 -什么？
Two and a half hours. - What?
我6点下班
I work till 6:00.
不 我现在就需要你 回家来
No. I need you now. Come home.
但是 -现在 米里亚姆 现在
But... - Now, Miriam, now.
爸爸
Papa.
现在！
Now, now, now.
我回来了！怎么了？
I'm here! What is it?
出了什么事？什么不见了？
What's the matter? What's missing?
眼睛、耳朵、鼻子、手、脚
Eye, eye, ear, ear, nose, hand, foot.
血？没出血！伊森没事
Blood? No blood. No blood! Ethan's fine.
是艾斯特吗？
Is it Esther? Oh, God.
哦 天啊 出了什么事？怎么了？
What's wrong? What's bad?
你看起来很好啊
You look fine. You look fine.
你的眼睛不对称
Your eyes are asymmetrical.
你就是为了这个给我打电♥话♥的？ 她的眼睛不对称？
Is that why you called me? Her eyes are asymmetrical?
我知道！我有应急计划！
I know that! I have a contingency plan!
米里亚姆 -爸爸！
Miriam. - Papa!