职介破事儿（2013）

不
Well, tough tits.
好吧，顽固的小鸟
Back to work, everyone, please.
回去工作，每个人，好吗
What about Karl?
Where is Karl?
那Karl呢？
Karl在哪？
I think what you're doing is so brave.
我认为你在做的事很勇敢
Well, I think, if you believe in something
you've got to stand up and fight
好吧，我认为如果你坚信一些东西
你就必须站起来为之奋斗
for your right...
为你的权利
to have a Christmas party.
So are you the rebel in the office?
来举♥行♥圣诞派对
所以你是办公室里的反叛者？
Oh, yeah, I'm always mucking about,
me.
哦，是的，我一直
I'm a bit of a maverick. In fact,
我有点标新立异。事实上
that's what they call me - Maverick.
那就是他们如何叫我的——独行其是者
Maverick? Really?
没印记的小牛？真的?
Like in Top Gun? Mm-hm. Yep.
就像顶尖高手？嗯嗯，对
Top Fun more like.
更像顶尖有趣
Cor, I am such a card.
Cor，我就是这样的一个怪人
I bet you are. Tell me some of the stuff you get up to.
我相信你是。告诉我一些你做的事
Er, well,
嗯好吧
sometimes we come to the pub after work and have, like,
有时候，我们工作后去酒吧并且
three pints of quite strong lager
and no tea, just crisps.
喝三品脱啤酒
没有茶，只有脆片
OK.
好吧
Anything else naughty? Um...
还有别的调皮事吗？嗯。。
Yeah.
I had sex in the manager's office.
有。
我在经理的办公室里做过
Really? What, with the manager?
真的？和经理？
Oh, no, no, no, no,
the deputy manager.
不，不，不
副经理
But it was on the manager's desk.
但那是在经理的桌子上
I, er...l spanked her on the bottom
with a shatterproof ruler.
我。嗯。。。我用防震的尺子
来打她下面。
That is naughty.
那可真调皮
Mm. Is she your girlfriend?
嗯，她是你女朋友吗？
Nah, nothing serious.
不，没那么认真
You need another drink. Mm.
你需要另一杯酒。嗯
Listen, I've got a bottle of vodka at my flat.
听着，在我公♥寓♥里有一瓶伏特加
Why don't you come back and I'll...
get you out of those damp clothes?
为什么你不过来，之后我。。
把你从这堆湿衣服里解救出来
Mmm...no.
嗯。。。不
No, I can't, sorry.
不，我不行，对不起
Thank you for the beer and the flirting
谢谢你的啤酒还有调情
but...I've just realised I've been a complete dickhead.
但是。。。我刚刚才发现我一直是个彻头彻尾的混♥蛋♥
This is Karl. I can't -
这是Karl，我不能
Natalie!
Natalie!
Shit.
啊
Oh, my God, Karl!
哦，天啊，Karl
Are you all right?
Karl? Wake up.
你没事吧？
Karl，醒醒
Are you all right? Karl?
你没事吧？Karl
Oh, my God. Wake up.
哦，天啊，醒醒
This is the bit where you sit on my face.
这就是你该骑到我脸上的时候了
Oh, you twat! Mm.
哦，你这个笨蛋。嗯
Correct.
正确
I'm sorry for that stupid strike.
我对那个愚蠢的罢♥工♥感到很抱歉
And for denting your Corsa.
还有撞凹了你的Corsa
It's all right.
没关系
Sorry I said your sexual fantasy was weird.
很抱歉我说你的性幻想很奇怪
Have you been drinking?
Mm-hm. Correct again.
你喝酒了？
嗯，又对了
I've had three pints of quite strong
lager and no tea, just crisps.
我喝了三品脱啤酒
没有茶，只有脆片
We should get you checked out at the hospital.
我们应该带你到医院检查一下
How many times?
I like AMATEUR first aid.
说过多少次？
我喜欢业余者的首次急救。
OK, come back to mine and I'll put
you in a sling or something.
好吧，回到我这，之后我会把
你缠上绷带或者别的什么。
Thank you, kind nurse.
谢谢你，善良的护士
Ooh. I also think I may have badly bruised my todger.
哦，我还认为，我可能严重擦伤了我的老二
Don't push it. I don't think I can.
别推它（别这样）。我不认为我可以。
lt's a Lovely day in Birmingham
but traffic is at a standstill on the Aston Expressway.
在伯明翰今天是个好天气
但是 Aston 高速公路却遇到了交通停滞
Angela, why are you still here?
We've reached an agreement.
You might have.
Angela。为什么你还在这里？
我们已经达成协议了
你是可能已经达成了。
You never come to the Christmas party anyway.
不管怎样，你从来不去圣诞派对，
停止忽视我们的健康和安全。
Scab.
噢
Here they are, the sex-mad staff of Brownall job Centre.
他们来了，Brownall 求职中心的性疯狂职工
I just hope you wiped everything down after.
我只希望你在那之后把一切东西都擦干净
What are you talking about?
你们在说什么？
So you had a drink with a journalist
yesterday afternoon, Karl?
所以你和一个记者
昨天下午喝了一杯，Karl？
Huh? What? No.
嗯?什么？不
She secretly filmed the whole thing.
'I had sex in the manager's office.'
她秘密地拍下了整件事
我在经理办公室做了
'With the manager?' 'No, no, no, the
deputy manager.
和经理？不不不
副经理
But it was on the manager's desk.
但那是在经理的桌子上
I spanked her on the bottom with a
shatterproof ruler.' Karl!
我用防震的尺子
来打她下面。karl
Uh? 'Is she your girlfriend?
嗯?她是你女朋友？
'Nah, nothing serious.'
不，没那么认真
'Nothing serious'?
没那么认真？
I can explain. Can you?
我可以解释的？你可以吗？
No. So not only have the papers run
a story about the strike,
不，所以报纸上不仅报道了
罢♥工♥的故事
they've also run a story about how
our staff are more likely to be...
他们还报道了我们的职工是怎样更像是
'on the job,
than finding you a job'.
“做”工作
较之帮你们找工作
It's all over the Internet.
You're trendy on Twitter.
这传遍了整个网络
你们现在是推特上的红人了
The comments are brilliant though.
'Filling holes not roles.'
评论倒是很有才。
不是个家伙却填了洞
I'd have gone with
'friends with benefits'.
我还有
有利的朋友（炮♥友♥）
'Blow job centre'. All right,
Janette.
嗨翻求职中心。好吧
Janette
I mean, is it true?
Did you have sex on my desk?
我的意思是，这是真的吗？
你们在我的桌子上做了？
No, we definitely did not, did we,
Karl?
不，我们绝对没做过，是不是？
Karl
No. Then why did you tell the
journalist you did?
没有。那你为什么告诉
记者你做过？
I was showing off.
Why were you showing off?
我只是在炫耀
你为什么在炫耀
Yeah, why?
是啊，为什么？
Because I thought she was -
Thought she was what?
因为我认为她是
认为她是什么?
Speak up. Come on.
说出来啊。来啊
Because I thought she was fit.
Because you thought she was fit.
因为我认为她适合
因为你认为她适合
Head office have agreed not to sack
you but you must both attend
总部已经同意不解雇你们，但是你们俩必须都参加
a week-long occupational therapy course
which deals with sexual addiction -
一个一周长的处理性瘾的职业的治疗课程
which the centre has to pay for,
中心得为此买♥♥单
which means we have to cancel the
Christmas party again. Well done, Karl.
这意味着我们再一次不得不取消
圣诞派对。干得不错，Karl
Oh, you have ruined my Christmas.
哦，你毁了我的圣诞节