一路绕行（2016）

最让你讨厌的事儿吗
the thing that annoys you most?
不 这才是最让我心烦的事儿
No, that is the most annoying thing.
这是 算了 你打吧
That... Whatever. Just go.
因为你查了规则 我是对的
Ohh! 'Cause you looked it up, and I was right!
你错了 - 我对了
No. - Yep.
你错了 - 看我的
No. - Watch. Watch this.
很明显 这是技术犯规
Clear technical foul!
什么 这明显是击中了
What? That was a clean roquet!
这是二次击球
Double hit!
该我了
Boom! My go.
Oksane 你愿意帮我
Oksana, if you would be so kind
踩住球吗
to please step on my ball?
好的 轻轻踩 还是狠狠踩住
Yes. Gently? Or you prefer intense pressure?
我们来点不一样的 稍微用点力
Oh, let's go with something different. A little intensity.
准备好了吗 - 亲爱的 我生来就时刻准备着
You ready for this? - I'm v... I was born ready, babe.
这才叫击中
Now that is a clean roquet.
我的手好柔软 我爱这款乳液
My hands are so soft. I love this lotion.
怎么不起作用
Hmm? Why isn't this thing working?
这破东西出什么鬼毛病了
What the hell's wrong with this thing?
身体怎么样了 朋友 - 我已经好了
How you feeling, pal? - I feel good.
你知道吗 我太喜欢这里了
You know, I really love this place.
你知道吗 我也有同样的感觉
You know what? I'm starting to feel the same way.
我爱这杯甜茶
I love this sweet tea.
爸爸 什么叫作♥爱♥
Dad, what's love?
什么叫"做"爱
What... What is...
天啊
Jeez.
我以为这场谈话会来得晚一些呢
Thought I had some time before this conversation.
爱是不是你想认识一个人 想和她说话
Is it when you wanna know a person and talk to the person
然后了解她的一切
and just... just know everything about the person?
是的 这是其中一部分
Yeah. Sure, that... That's part of it, yeah.
你还想闻她们
And you just wanna smell them
然后穿过镜子
and just crawl through the mirror
帮她们梳理头发
and just help them comb their hair?
哥们儿 你在学校里有朋友吧
You have friends at school, right, pal?
是的 但是 我感觉待在这里非常愉悦
Yeah, just... It feels really good inside.
就是感觉很棒
Like... like, really good.
我知道 感觉很棒
Feels great. I know it.
有这种感觉很正常
And it's perfectly natural.
只是 你需要牢记一件事
Just... One thing to keep in mind
我们不能总这么干
is we shouldn't do it all the time.
但我现在满脑子都是这个 - 相信我
But it's all I can think about. - Trust me.
有的时候我也跟你一样 朋友
Sometimes I'm there with you, pal,
一天大概想个六七八次
like six, seven, eight times a day.
我只想告诉全世界
I just wanna tell the whole world.
不 公开不是个好主意 你可以悄悄做
No. Not a good idea. No. Do it,
也可以很享受 但别公之于众
enjoy it, but let's keep it private.
还有 记得自己清理干净
And, you know, clean up after yourself
因为你 东西丢的满地都是
'cause you... You really made a mess.
没想到你也这么想 我是从屏幕中了解的
Tell me about it. I got it all over the screen.
真见鬼
Hell of an arc.
我告诉你 我每次喝伏特加
I tell you, every time I drink vodka...
我 呃 - 你都会吐 每喝必吐
I, uh... - you throw it up. Every time.
那边挂着的油画真漂亮
Well, that's a beautiful, beautiful painting up there.
是的
Oh, yes.
说道漂亮
And speaking of beautiful...
哦 谢谢你
Oh. Oh, thank you.
还喝鱼汤吗 - 嗯
More ukha? - Yeah. Mmm.
他是 他是个大男孩了 他可以自己吃饭
You know, he is... he's a big boy. He can feed himself.
男人需要别人照顾
Oh, men need to be taken care of.
他们是需要照顾 但是在2岁之前
They do, they do, until about the age of 2,
还不会用勺子的时候才需要照顾
when they figure out how to use a spoon.
俄♥罗♥斯♥有句谚语 用来形容尖酸刻薄的女人
In Russia, we have an old saying about sarcastic woman.
是什么 - 看来你是个拉拉 因为没有男人喜欢你
Oh? - You're a lesbian, and no man will love you.
什么 我以为她想表达的是
What? I think what she's maybe trying to say
我们应该彬彬有礼地
is that we should all just be civil
与心爱之人共饮鱼头汤
and enjoy our fish head soup with loved ones.
看看他如何对待女人 柔情中带着强硬 就像普♥京♥
Mmm. See how he handles woman? Nice and strong, like Putin.
我相信你敢跟熊摔跤
I bet you wrestle bear.
是的 那当然
Yeah, you bet.
Oksane 大庭广众之下能别这样吗
Oksana, could we not do this in front of company?
能别这样吗 算我求你了
Could we not, please? I'm begging you.
为什么不呢 你需要多向他学 这个人
Why? You need to be more like him. This one...
一整天都在摘风铃草 像个基佬
Spend all day picking bluebells like a gay.
整天哭哭啼啼 呜呜呜
Always crying, boo-hoo-hoo.
"娇美的鲜花 让我想起亡妻" 呜呜呜
"Pretty flowers remind me of dead wife." Boo-hoo-hoo.
Svetlana Svetlana 别走
Svetlana, Svetlana, please.
可想而知
As you can imagine,
这些变数对她来说很难接受
all this uncertainty has been hard on her.
不 她难过 因为你是个窝囊废
No, it's been hard on her because you're pussy.
你都不去追她
You don't even go after her.
为什么每件事都要我亲自做
Why do I have to do everything by myself?
抱歉 我想先离席 - 好的 请便
Excuse me. - Yeah. Of course.
有时我甚至都不知道
Mm. Sometimes I don't even know.
她是不是真的想和我在一起
if she wants to be with me at all.
噢
Ohh.
她当然不想和她在一起
She doesn't wanna be with him.
她是想和我在一起
She wants to be with me.
噢
Ohh.
你应该为我这么抢手而感到高兴
You should be flattered other women find me attractive,
知道吗 Nate Parker 可是优质股
all right? Nate Parker stock is going through the roof,
而你可是有百分之100的所有权
and you own 100% of it.
怎么样 你想要行使你的"特权"吗
What do you say? You wanna... Exercise your option?
做♥爱♥做的事
Means we should do it.
噢
Oh.
Nate你在吗 嗨 Robin
Nate? Robin. Robin. Robin, listen, uh...
你介不介意我借用Nate一个小时
Do you mind if I borrow Nate for about an hour?
怎么了
Uh, what do you need?
一些男人之间的事
It's sort of a boys-only kind of thing.
稍等 我看看他有什么其他计划
Hold on just a sec. I'm just gonna see if he has plans.
你有其他要紧事吗
Do you have plans?
没有 非常好
No? Well, great.
看来他的计划今天晚上是别想了
Looks like his plans are not gonna happen tonight.
太好了
Wonderful.
走慢点
Wait up, man.
你快告诉我到底是干什么吧
You gonna tell me what the hell we're doing?
无论发生什么都保持摄像状态 - 好吧
just keep filming, all right? No matter what happens. - Yeah, yeah.
明白了 - 明白
You understand? - Yeah.
好了 听我说
All right, listen to me,
我亲爱的小套娃 我爱你 宝贝
my sweet little matryoshka doll, I love you, baby,
我要彻底地向你表明
and I'm gonna prove to you once and for all
我是一个真正的男人
that I'm a real man, a-a...
该死的 Nate 别竖着拍
Damn it, Nate, you... you doing vertical video?
横着来 对了 就这样
Yeah, just... just... yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
很好 我们开始吧
Good. All right, let's... let's just do this thing. Uh-huh.
来吧
All right!
出来啊 狗♥娘♥养♥的
Come on out here, you son of a bitch.
我知道你在这里
I know you're there.
滚出来
Come on!
噢 天啊 干 那是什么
Oh, my gosh. Oh, shit, what is that?
Nate Nate Nate - 哦 该死的
Nate. Nate, Nate, Nate, Nate. - Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
Nate Nate 别怕 - 是熊 那是只熊
Nate, Nate, Nate. Nate! - It's a that's a bear! That's a bear!
嗯 是只熊 那些俄♥国♥女人
Yeah, it's a bear. These Russian women,
你知道 她们就喜欢刺♥激♥的
you know, they ask the world.
你干什么呢 别闹了
What are you doing? What... Come on!
你干什么呢
What are you doing?!
噢 我的天啊
Oh, my god! Oh, my god!
哦
Oh, shit!
啊 别打了 别打了
Uhh! No, no! No!
噢 别打了 Nate
Uhh! Ow! Nate! Nate!
你打伤我了 - 为什么这只熊会说话
You're hurting me! Ow! - Why is that bear talking?!