腌黄瓜先生

如果老爸发现你
Dad's gonna kill you
拿了他的签名球瓶 他会杀了你
if he finds out you took his autographed pin.
看看能把球瓶塞进喉咙多深
Let's see how far we can shove it down our throats.
酷
Cool!
你只塞进了10厘米
You only got 4 inches.
帮我往里推一点
Help me push it in further.
可以和你们一起玩吗
Can I play with you guys?
他是那个残疾的废物
Hey, it's that crippled loser.
抓住他
Get him!
腌黄瓜
Oh, Mr...
腌黄瓜先生
Mr. Pickle
腌黄瓜先生
第三季 第八集
汤米
Tommy?
那些恶霸殴打我
The bullies beat me up.
哪些恶霸
Who are the bullies?
布朗普顿兄弟
The Blorpton boys.
儿子 是时候教你如何打架
Well, son, it's time I teach you how to fight...
像男人一样为自己而战
And stand up for yourself like a man!
-不行 -好 抱歉
- No! - Okay. Sorry.
暴♥力♥解决不了问题
Violence isn't the answer.
我确定 如果我和汤米开车去那
I'm sure if I drive Tommy over there,
我们就能和平解决这个问题
we can work this out peacefully.
但每次你开我的卡车
But every time you drive my truck,
都把车子弄坏了
it gets damaged.
不如你去谷仓找你的旧自行车
Why don't you get your old bike from the barn, huh?
我们到了
We're here.
你好 我是贝弗莉
Hi. I'm Beverly.
这是我儿子
Oh, uh, and this is my son.
-废物来这里干什么 -对 废物
- Hey, what's that loser doing here? - Yeah, loser!
我们给你们带了些松饼 因为
Oh, uh, we brought you some muffins because...
什么 你觉得我靠自己养活不了家人吗
What? You think I can't feed my own family?
午餐准备好了 孩子们
Lunch is ready, boys!
太好了 我饿了
Oh, great, I'm starving.
别用牙齿咬
Hey, no teeth!
你孩子年龄有点大 不适合母乳喂养
Uh, aren't your kids a little old to be nursing?
你是在对我指手画脚吗
Are you judging me?
你到底想怎么样 贱♥人♥
What the hell do you want anyway, bitch?
我们的孩子起了点小冲突 所以我
Oh. See, our sons got into a little fight, so I...
真的吗 孩子们
Is this true, boys?
我们打了他一顿
We kicked his ass.
但他还能走路
And he's still walking?
如果你们要打人
If you're gonna beat somebody
就要狠一点
up, take them all... the... way... down.
停手
Stop!
打他们解决不了任何问题
Hitting them won't solve anything.
你先是对我指手画脚 然后是我老公
First you judge me, then my husband?
不 我
No, I...
你觉得你能成为比我们称职的父母吗
You think you can be a better parent to our kids?
-那把他们带走 -什么
- Well, take them. - What?
对 我讨厌我们的孩子
Yeah. We hate our kids.
走吧 我们去打保龄球
Come on, bitch. Let's go bowling.
可是
But, Oh...
不 稍等
Uh, no, wait.
现在怎么办
Now what?
孩子们 孩子们
Boys, boys, boys!
孩子们 放乖点
Boys, behave!
我知道什么能让你们冷静下来
I know what will calm you boys down.
-谁要三明治 -太好了 我饿了
- Who wants sandwiches? - Great, I'm starving.
不
No!
我们要喝奶
We want milk!
-不行 -不行 别闹了
- No! Oh! - No, stop!
我们去看那个老头
Let's see if the old man
乳♥房♥♥里有没有奶
has any milk in those man boobs.
贝弗莉 不敢相信你收留了这两个小流氓
Beverly, I can't believe you took these hooligans in.
-放开我 -老头喂我们奶
- Hey! Get off of me! - Feed us old man.
他们的父母去打保龄球 把他俩扔给了我
Their parents went bowling and just left them with me.
他的乳♥房♥♥都干了
Aw, he's all dried up.
孩子们 我把你们
Boys, how would you like me
送回父母那里怎么样
to take you back to your parents, huh?
我去找他们的父母
I'll go find their parents.
住手
Stop that.
我要打你们的屁♥股♥
You boys need a spanking.
不 我能处理
No. I can handle this.
汤米 去给他们拿些玩具玩
Tommy, go get some toys they can play with.
-好 妈 -没关系
- Okay, Mom. - It's okay.
-我们带了玩具 -妈妈的玩具
- We brought our mom's toys. - Mom's toys!
比剑
Sword fight!
孩子们 回来
Boys, get back here!
老镇 保龄球馆
超级大劈叉 一球打不倒两瓶
A 7-10 split, that shot is impossible.
你可以的 警长
You can do it, Sheriff!
游戏重置
你们干什么
Hey. What did you do that for?
这个球道是我们的
This is our lane.
你知道你们惹了什么人吗
Do you know who you're messing with?
当然 娘娘腔
Yeah, pussies.
你不骑自行车
You ain't bikers.
你连摩托车也不骑
You don't even ride motorcycles.
我们以前骑 但它们太危险
Uh, we used to, but they're too dangerous.
脱掉
Yoink!
我讨厌霸凌
I hate bullies.
冷静 路易
Easy, Louie.
别理布朗普顿
Leave the Blorptons alone, huh?
所以你就是布朗普顿
So you're the Blorptons?
你得去我家接你孩子
You need to come get your kids from my house.
我们不要他们了
We don't want them.
不如我们来比保龄球
Why don't you bowl for it?
输的人留着孩子
Loser keeps the kids.
什么 太荒谬了
What? That's ridiculous.
怎么样 胆小鬼
What's the matter? Chicken?
胆小鬼 这招对我没用
Chicken noises, huh? That'll never work on me.
胆小鬼
Chicken.
-别追了 -比剑
- Stop! - Sword fight!
-不 别刺我 -抓住他
- No! Don't stab me! - Get him!
不 求你们别追了
No! Please stop!
我们在汤米身上试试这个玩具
Let's use the toys on Tommy...
-不要 -就像老妈用它对付老爸
- No! - ...the way Mom uses them on Dad.
不
No!
孩子们
Boys.
你们要怎样才会听话
What is it gonna take for you to behave?
也许喝些奶
Maybe some milk.
喝奶 喝奶
Milk, milk, milk, milk.
停手
Stop.
除了喝奶 你们还有什么
Isn't there anything you boys like to eat
想吃的吗
besides milk?
没有
No.
蛋糕也不吃吗
Not even cake?
好吧
Uh, all right.
我们喜欢吃蛋糕
We do like cake.
那我们走去商店买♥♥些蛋糕粉
Then let's walk to the store and get some cake mix.
为什么不开车去
Why can't you drive there?
我爸不让她开卡车
Dad doesn't let her drive the truck
因为她总弄坏车
because she always damages it.
-她不会开车 -她不会开车
- She can't drive. - She can't drive.
-她不会开车 -她不会开车
- She can't drive. - She can't drive.
洗沟球
Ooh, gutter ball.
我想修理那两个该死的恶霸
I want to hurt those damn bullies.
怎么了 瑞克
What's wrong, Rick?
一般你很喜欢修理恶霸
Usually you love hurting bullies.
别担心
Eh, don't worry about it.
我喷 我喷
Squirt! Squirt!