腌黄瓜先生

don't mean you got to buy it.
别转换话题
Don't try to change the subject.
我在说妈妈
I'm talking about Mama!
如果你是个男人 妈宝男
If you were a man, Mama's Boy,
我们就不会惹上这么多麻烦了
we'd never be in this mess.
也许我不用喝酒 打架 做♥爱♥
Well, maybe I don't got to drink, fight,
来成为男人
and sex to be a man.
也许你根本不算朋友
Maybe you're no friend at all.
只是个没用的笨蛋
Just a no-good bozo!
好吧
Fine.
那我们分道扬镳
Let's just go our separate ways.
祝你和你的娃娃在野外里好运 妈宝男
Good luck in the wild with your doll, Mama's Boy.
她不是娃娃
She's not a doll!
她叫 阿比盖尔
She's... Abigail?
阿比盖尔
Abigail!
闭嘴 警长
Shut up, Sheriff!
不 你闭嘴 警长
No, you shut up, Sheriff!
-闭嘴 -不 你闭嘴
- Shut up! - No, you shut up!
说真的 别说话
Seriously, shut up.
那儿有什么东西
Something's out there!
好吧 我闭嘴
All right, I'm shutting up.
但不是因为你叫我闭嘴我才闭的
But it's not because you told me to!
天呐 我的头好疼
Oh, man! My head hurts!
-闭嘴 -为什么我的头这么疼
- Shut up. Shut up. - Why does my head hurt so bad?
闭嘴
Shut up!
树林里有东西
There's something up in them woods.
可能是食人族
It could be cannibals.
可能是性别错乱的自交生物 或者
Or sexually-confused inbreds or...
只是一群狼而已
Oh, it's just a bunch of wolves.
狼
Wolves?!
警长 我们得像男人一样
Sheriff, we got to man up
跟狼搏斗
and fight these wolves!
不了 你不需要打架才能成为男人的
Nah. You don't got to fight to be a man.
接招吧 杂种们
Uh, come get some, wolf bitches!
天呐
Oh. Man.
好消息
Good news!
我找到阿比盖尔了
I found Abigail!
现在别玩了 它们要吃了我
Not now! They eating me! Aah!
你叫这些狼停下来 不然就逮捕它们
Just tell the wolves to stop or you'll arrest them.
好主意 听着 狼
Good idea. Now, listen up, wolves!
很好 我已经引起你们注意了
Oh, great. I already got your attention.
现在把爪子放到脑袋后面
Now, place your paws behind your heads.
娃娃
Hey, the doll!
它们喜欢那个娃娃
They like the doll!
不好意思 谁
I'm sorry. Who?
阿比盖尔
Abigail.
谢谢
Thank you very much.
你们好 狼
Now, hi, wolves!
我叫阿比盖尔
My name is Abigail.
我是一个有趣的小女孩 看我走路
I'm a little funny girl. Look at me walk!
还会飞来飞去
And fly around. Whee!
我会唱歌♥
I can sing a song.
我还能干什么呢
What else can I do?
看 我在这里
Look, I'm over here.
现在我又在这里
And now I'm over here.
现在我又在这里
And now I'm over here.
-做得好 警长 -现在我又在这里
- Yeah, Sheriff! - And now I'm over here.
这样有用
It's working!
现在我又在这里
And now I'm over here.
现在我又在这里
And now I'm over here.
现在我又在这里
And now I'm over here.
警长 醒醒
Sheriff, wake up!
阿比盖尔
A-A-A-Abigail!
我再也不喝酒了
Oh! I am never drinking again.
狼妈妈
The mama wolf!
再见 妈宝男
Goodbye, Mama's Boy!
来 我知道怎么让你开心起来
Hey, I know how to cheer you up.
你不开心只是因为后面的毛打结了
See, you are just cranky 'cause of these knots back here.
是的
Oh, yeah.
你喜欢我帮你梳毛 狼妈妈
You like it when I brush you, Mama Wolf.
-你很喜欢 -她喜欢你
- Yes, you do. - She likes you!
我想当妈宝男也挺有用的
I guess being a mama's boy can be pretty handy.
是的
Oh, yeah.
我挺厉害的
I'm pretty... pretty cool.
-什么 -我
- What? - I, uh...
什么 伙计
What, man? What?
我觉得狼妈妈有点太喜欢你了
I think Mama Wolf likes you a little too much.
你什么意思
What do you mean?
欢迎来到第三步
Welcome to step three!
什么
What?
不
Oh, no.
我做不来
I can't do that.
你最好去跟那只狼做♥爱♥ 不然我们死定了
You better go have sex with that wolf, or we're dead!
不
Oh, no.
你家很漂亮
Nice place you got, I guess.
好吧
Oh. Okay.
我不确定要不要这样
Look, uh, I don't know about this.
你知道 我
You know, I... Oh!
你好主动
You're very assertive. Oh.
你知道 我是想结婚的
Look, you know, I'm kind of waiting for marriage and...
你想让我脱掉裤子吗
Oh. You want me to take my pants off?
好吧 别看
Okay. Don't look.
好吧
Oh! Oh. Uh, okay.
我们是不是应该先互相了解一下
Hey, uh, shouldn't we get to know each other a little first?
你在对我的小鸡鸡做什么
Hey, what are you doing to my pee-pee?
发生了什么
Aah! Aah! What's happening?
你能慢一点吗
Aah! Oh, can you slow down?
好疼
Owie, owie, owie, owie! That hurts!
好疼
That hurts!
警长 你现在是个男人了
Sheriff, now you're a man.
对不起 宝贝
Sorry, babe.
我要去见吉米叔叔了
I got to go see my Uncle Jimmy.
她男人回来了
Her man's home.
这种情况下 只用做一件事
Only one thing to do in this situation!
跑
Run!
我们好像跑出来了
I guess we outran it.
我不觉得
I don't think that...
总之 没事了 伙计
Well, anyway, it's all good, man.
对妈妈好一点
Just be good to Mama.
-对了 帮我个忙 -什么
- Oh, and do me a favor. - Yeah?
你能不要告诉别人我跟一只狼做♥爱♥了吗
Can you not tell anybody I had sex with a wolf?
警长
Hi, Sheriff!
警长 你跟一只狼做♥爱♥了
Sheriff, you had sex with a wolf?
我得说实话
Hey, uh, I got to be honest.
其实没有什么吉米叔叔
There is no Uncle Jimmy.
但我真的不打算谈恋爱
But, look, I'm really not looking for a relationship.
你在这里干什么呢 腌黄瓜先生
Oh! What are you doing here, Mr. Pickles?