幻灭（2018）

Remember, Dagmar,
还记得吗 达格玛
when we used to sneak into church to smooch on this very spot?
我们以前溜进教堂 就在这里拥吻
Oh, the fun we had.
多愉快啊
If only I was caressing your warm, soft hand
我多想再摸摸你温暖柔软的手
instead of this cold, stone foot.
而不是这冰冷的石头做的脚
I wish you were here for Beanie.
我希望你为了碧妮还活着
You know how hard it is being a father without a mother
你知道没有妈妈 做爸爸的多不容易吗
doing all the work?
所有的事都一个人干
Oh, who am I kidding?
我在骗谁呢
I wish you were here for me.
我希望你为了我还活着
Aw, he's like a coconut.
他真像个椰子
Hard on the outside, but on the inside...
外面坚硬 里面却
coconut. Jerry!
真像个椰子啊 杰瑞
Who said you could watch the Oracle Fire?
谁允许你看神谕之火了
Zog's leaving the church. We must track his progress.
佐格要离开教堂了 我们必须跟着他
Show me the wizard.
给我看巫师
Eye of newt, tail of newt,
蝾螈眼 蝾螈尾
rest of newt and blood of elf.
蝾螈的残骸 精灵血
Doink.
好了
This better be the Elixir of Life.
你最好配制出了长生灵药
I wish it were elixir of death, you fat sack. Oops!
我希望这是猝死灵药 死胖子 啊呀
What? Apologies, Your Highness.
什么 抱歉 陛下
I seem to have accidentally invented a truth serum,
我好像一不小心配制出了真话浆
you gravy-swilling blowhard! Oh.
你个满嘴肉汁的吹牛大王 哦
Truth serum? No king wants to hear the truth.
真话浆 没有哪个国王想听真话的
I want the key to life!
我要长生不老的药
You've had elf blood for weeks and what do you got to show for it?
你拿到精灵血那么久 做出什么来了
Well, I created a shampoo that can make any animal laugh.
我做出了能让任何动物大笑的洗发水
How do I know he didn't used to do that?
谁知道他是不是以前就这样
Make the Elixir of Life
配制出长生灵药
or I'll throw you in a wizard-proof cage,
不然我把你关到巫师也难逃的笼子里
which for you is a cardboard box with a brick on it.
对付你 其实只要往纸板箱上放根棍子
Promise me you won't attend my funeral.
答应我 不要来参加我的葬礼
So, I hope our drugged-out kiss isn't making things awkward.
希望我们神志不清的吻没有让关系太尴尬
It's not. It's just,
没有 只是
now we're in this weird limbo place
我们当时在那个奇幻的边缘地带
and we don't know what we're doing.
不知道在自己做什么
I know exactly what we're doing. We're shopping for turnips.
我很清楚自己在做什么 我们要买♥♥萝卜
Oh, uh, hey, a distraction!
打断一下
What's going on? Why's everyone so excited?
发生什么了 为什么大家都这么兴奋
Remember how people used to just work, starve or eat?
记得以前人们只能工作 挨饿或者吃饭吗
Now there's a fourth thing, entertainment.
现在有第四件事了 娱乐
Entertainment is just a tool that pacifies the masses
娱乐只是用来安抚大众
and leads to the decay and ultimate collapse of civilization.
引领文明走向堕落和瓦解的工具
Let's clap along.
我们跟着鼓掌吧
Uh, excuse me, pardon me.
不好意思 让一下
Move your fat ass, please.
请挪一下你的的肥臀
Ugh. I really don't like the view from down here.
我一点都不喜欢这下边的视野
I love to sway and bounce to the music.
我喜欢随着音乐摇摆跳跃
Miss Moonpence?
月亮便士小姐
Yes, Minister?
是 部长
Do I have an audience with the king this morning?
我今天早上要觐见国王吗
No, Minister. Good.
不用 部长 很好
I've got a lot of official matters to take care of.
我有很多公事要处理
I wonder what's for lunch.
中饭吃什么
Goat loaf.
山羊面包
With spring vegetables.
配春天的蔬菜
And gravy.
还有肉汤
They're out of gravy.
肉汤没有了
Oh, I'm in trouble, Oddie.
我有大♥麻♥烦了 奥狄
I can't crack the Elixir of Life
我制不出长生灵药
no matter how much I abracazab and alakazoo.
我念多少遍吗咪哄 巴扎嘿都没用
I'm a fraud!
我是个骗子
I am, aren't I?
对不对
As a friend and lover, there is none truer than you.
作为朋友和爱人 没有人比你更诚实了
These hands... I thought they had magic.
这双手 我以为它们有魔法
They do, and they will.
有的 会有的
I just don't know how to work with this elf blood.
我就是不知道精灵血怎么用
It's like it's made of crazy sauce.
它就像变♥态♥酱汁一样
I've tried every spell in the book I have.
书里所有咒语我都试过了
Then perhaps you need a new book.
那么或许你需要一本新书
You see, there was another practitioner of the dark arts here.
告诉你 还有一个会施黑魔法的人
The Witch.
女巫
This was her lair.
这是她住的地方
That's gonna need more than a fresh coat of frosting.
这破房♥子可不是新涂层糖霜就能修好的
The Omnicon!
《魔法大全》
The ancient book of spells and easy Sunday dinners
记载了古老的咒语和周日晚餐的古书
of which only two copies are known to exist!
世界上已知的只有两本
The other belongs to Collecticus
另一本属于收藏杂♥志♥社
and is still sealed in its original box.
还封在原装的盒子里
Elixir of Life with Rice!
米饭做的长生灵药
At last, the elf.
终于啊 精灵
I've been stalking you, but you have come to me.
我一直在跟踪你 但你自己送上门来了
Oh, you're a stranger. I've heard about you.
你是个陌生人 我听说过你
Now, where's my candy?
我的糖呢
Bless you.
祝福你
Help, help!
救命 救命
Elfo! Where are you?
艾尔弗 你在哪
In here! Hurry, it's really itchy!
我在里面 快点 这里好痒啊
I escaped.
我逃出来了
No!
不
I'll find you, Elfo.
我会找到你的 艾尔弗
I knew you should've kept him on a leash.
我就知道 你该用绳子栓着他
Mmm, boy, the new armor these days.
天哪 现在流行的新盔甲
Have you seen it? So bulky.
你见过吗 特别笨重
I prefer to stay safe the old-fashioned way,
我还是喜欢过去保证安全的办法
running like a coward.
像胆小鬼一样跑掉
Your Highness, I have miraculous news.
陛下 我有惊天大消息
Great, let me turn this off.
好 让我把他弄走
Oh, no.
哦不
Sire, we have found the secret to making the Elixir of Life
陛下 我们发现了用精灵血
using elf's blood.
配制长生灵药的秘诀
And?
然后呢
The blood must be distilled in a special vial,
血必须在一种特殊的瓶子中提炼
known as the Eternity Pendant.
这瓶子叫做永生吊瓶
And? We don't have it.
然后呢 我们没有
But we do know of its most recent location.
但我们知道它最近的位置
But we looked, and it's not there.
但我们去看了 不在那
But we can mount a crusade to find the vial.
但我们可以发起远征来找药瓶
But at least we have the elf.
再不济我们还有精灵
Elfo has been kidnapped!
小精灵被绑♥架♥了
Fine, fine, on with the whacking.
好吧 来吧 别怜惜我
Hey! That picture was on the wagon they took Elfo away in!
绑走精灵的马车上就有这张图
Belay the whacking.
你再忍♥忍♥
Your Highness, whoever kidnapped Elfo knows about that vial,
殿下 带走精灵的绑匪知道这个药瓶
which means
也就是说
They're also after the Elixir of Life.
他们也在找生命之水
Find the vial, and we find Elfo.
找到药瓶 也能找到小精灵
Send all the knights on a quest for the vial!
出动所有骑士 势必找到药瓶
Cancel all other quests.
其他远征先停一停
We'll find the one true god next year.
我们明年再找真♥主♥
We can't let the Eternity Pendant fall into the wrong hands.
我们不能让永生吊瓶落入坏人之手
Summon our stealthiest assassin. Right here, sir.
该召唤隐形刺客了 我在 阁下
Don't do that.
吓爹一跳
Fellow knights,
各位骑士
my lady, and Mertz's mother, who insisted on coming.
夫人 以及死皮赖脸要来的梅尔兹他妈
You won't even know I'm here. Don't slouch, peanut.
你们不会注意到我的 直起腰来小饼干
We embark on our quest
我们的目标是
to bring immortality to our lord and ruler,
把永生带给我们的统治者 我们的大人
the King of Dreamland.
梦想之地的国王