节食王国

Dietland S01E08

Part 1 June 8, 2020, 11:59 a.m.

亚当和夏娃已经覆水难收
The die was cast with Adam and Eve.
一个女一个男
One's an innie, one's an outtie.
男人的行为都很"外放"
The outie acts all "Outtie."
猎杀生火
It kills things and builds fires and stuff,
而女人都聚在一起高效地沟通着
while the innie gathers and communicates effectively.
还有造人
Oh, and makes people. Literally.
他们都有着自己的基本技能
They both have essential skills.
他们彼此需要
They need each other.
必须要说明的是有些人虽生为男人
I should mention that some people are born outtie
但一部分却是女人或者相反
but with innie parts, or the other way around,
有时候全是女人
or sometimes no parts,
还有各种彩虹...
and in a huge range of colors and--
很复杂
It gets complicated.
这么说吧男人代表着
Let's just say that outtie stands for
"拥有所有权力"
"They with all the power."
因为正如马斯洛所说
Because like Maslow said,
马斯洛需求层次理论
在空气食物水之后
after air, food, and water,
就都是安全问题了
it's all about safety.
因此赤♥裸♥裸的暴♥力♥赢得了"多数人类生存要素"
So brute force wins "Most essential for human survival,"
多年以来我们都赞美男人
and for years and years we celebrate the outtie.
男人万岁
All hail the outtie!
直到有人发明了机器
Until somebody invents machines.
现在机器代替了男人之前的很多工作
Now, machines do a lot of what the outtie used to do,
包括杀人
including killing people.
突然间丁丁权力不再那么重要
Suddenly, penis power isn't so essential,
那么无可非议
so undeniable.
而女人的优势却没有减退
None of this escapes the innies,
坦白说之前那些聚会
and frankly, all the gathering,
开始变得没有新意
it's starting to get old.
女人渴望能多
The innies want more.
男女平等停止性别薪酬差距
她们开始呐喊自己多么渴望平等
They start howling about how they want equality
还有这些年来男人
and about some of the really bad crap
一直没有接受制裁的罪行
that the outties have been getting away with for years.
对少数穷凶极恶的男人
And yeah, a few of the very worst outties
应该好好想想他们在自己的冰山上
get sent to think about their wrongs
犯下的错
on their own personal iceberg.
但这些冰山有网络和五星级大厨
But the iceberg has cable and a five-star chef.
这反思还真是舒服呢
What a reckoning, huh?
你觉得那些所谓的惩罚
Think that kind of so-called punishment
将会造成持久的改变吗
is gonna make lasting change?
只有权力才能做出改变
What changes things is power--
珍妮弗永存
关键在于谁拥有它和如何利用它
who has it and how you use it.
你是个好巫婆还是个坏巫婆
Are you a good witch or a bad witch?
珍妮弗很懂
Jennifer knows this.
只有坏人害怕了
Lasting change only happens
才会做出持久性的改变
when the baddies are running scared.
最新的消息是致最坏男人榜前一百名
Their latest message was to the top 100 worst outties,
或者按珍妮弗给他们的亲切称呼
or, as Jennifer affectionately refers to them,
100丁丁
the Penis 100.
它在呼吁对世界上所有的施暴者
It calls for a sex strike
珍妮弗提名的100位男人将不会被欺负
进行一场性罢♥工♥
against the world's abusers.
现代吕西斯忒拉忒
Lysistrata for the modern age.
如果你需要查一下我可以暂停
I'll pause if you need to look it up.
《吕西斯忒拉忒》是一部阿里斯托芬所作的喜剧在公元前41年雅典首次出演
这部喜剧主要描写了一个女人的丰功伟绩她结束了伯罗奔尼撒半岛之战拒绝让该岛上的所有男性过性生活
吕西斯忒拉忒说服希腊女性拒绝和自己的丈夫和情人过性生活以此为计策逼迫男人和解从而引发了性别之战
该剧是较早揭露男性主导社会的两性关系的一部作品
总之詹妮弗已经决定从今天开始
Anyway, Jennifer has decreed that from this day forward
这些坏丁丁无论何地
these bad penises shall not enter
都不能上女人
any woman, anywhere.
而那些选择不与自己需求妥协的女人
And for women who choose not to cooperate with their demands,
将会面临一定的后果
there will be consequences.
而且相信我你不会想面对这些后果的
And believe me, you do not want these consequences.
这是不是很棒
Isn't it amazing?
斯坦利·奥斯汀都在这个名单上
Even Stanley Austen is on the list.
沃尔特·埃里克森
威廉·汉利
克雷格·威尔斯
斯坦利·奥斯汀
路易斯·里斯
卡珀·德雷克
李子我是杰克
Plum, it's Jack.
我感觉很羞愧我是个傻子
I'm mortified. I'm an idiot,
很抱歉我做出了那样的反应
and so sorry for the way I acted.
我们还能做朋友吗
Can we please be friends?
请好吧贱♥人♥
Bitch, please.
你说什么
Excuse me?
-没在说你 -那就好
- Oh, not you. - Well, good,
因为我们要来商量一下策略小宝贝
because we gotta talk strategy, baby girl.
-为什么 -依兰·M三世刚刚转发了你的"我是凯蒂"
- Why? - Ira M. III retweeted your "I Am Kitty" Rant
而且上传到了《每日怪兽》上
and posted it on the Daily Beast.
真的假的
Are you kidding me?
现在哪都发了《精致》《喧嚣时尚》
Girl, it's everywhere. Refinery, Bustle...
我的天哪这太棒了
Oh, my God. This is incredible!
这就说到谢丽尔·克瑞恩·墨菲了
Which brings us to Cheryl Crane-Murphy,
他打电♥话♥来请求采访
who called for an interview.
又一次
Again.
不不
No! No.
我不会去奥斯汀传媒的我知道他们是怎么样
I'm not going to Austen Media. I know how they roll.
碾压我的
Over me.
好吧但你不能就这样像竹篮打水一样
Fine. But you can't just catch lightning in a bottle
还把篮子扔到垃圾桶里了
and throw it in the garbage can.
我没有竹篮打水
I'm not catching lightning.
我只是想帮助那些混乱的女孩获得力量
I'm just trying to help empower some messed-up girls.
就这样
That's it.
我不想让这些都以我为主
I don't want this all to be about me.
但事情已经开始以你为主了小宝贝
It's already been about you, baby girl.
从你把你忙碌的脑中每个想法都发布上网开始
Ever since you started blogging every thought in your busy head.
我没有我就写了一篇文章
I didn't! I-- I wrote a post,
就那么一篇文章来描述我自己
as in a singular post, about how it was me,
一个又胖又易怒的在回凯蒂邮件的女孩
big, fat angry chick, responding to Kitty's emails.
李子
Plum!
楼下有一个快递员在等你
Hey, there's a messenger for you downstairs.
-你得下去签字 -是什么啊
- You gotta sign for it. - What is it?
-是凯特尔小姐 -是的
- Ms. Kettle? - Yeah.
我喜欢你的文章
Hey. I-- I loved your piece.
-谢谢 -你就像炸♥弹♥一样
- Oh. Thank you. - You're the bomb.
你是你是他们之中的一员对吧
Yeah. You're, like-- You're, like, one of them, right?
珍妮弗
Jennifer?
不不我只是一个在思考的女性
N-No. I-- I-- I'm just a woman who thinks.
好吧我还在找珍妮弗联盟
Too bad. I was looking for a Jennifer hookup.
还想着要加入呢
You know? Thinkin' about joining.
已经弄好了抱歉
You're served. Sorry.
法♥院♥判决奥斯汀传媒将获得
Court finds damages in the amount of $15 million
1500万美元的赔偿
shall be awarded to Austen Media,
还有斯坦利·奥斯汀和凯蒂·蒙哥马利
Stanley Austen and Kitty Montgomery.
我现在都没有工作了
I don't even have a job anymore!
那这又是谁的错呢大嘴巴
Who's fault is that, big-mouth?!
你看起来...很漂亮
You look...nice.
你看起来像是穿正装的男人
You look like a guy in a suit.
是啊
Yeah.
我想我们都打扮了一番对吧
I guess we both dressed for it, huh?
你现在有新工作了
You on a new job?
是的在奥斯汀传媒
Yeah. At Austen.
所以...
So...
不能待很久
can't stay long.
但我欠你个人情
But I owe ya.
你的确是的
Yeah, you do.
怎么了
What's up?
凯蒂起诉了我
Kitty's suing me.
我没钱了
I don't have any money.
她不能从石头里挤出血来但这个条款
She can't get blood from a stone. But this stuff?
不能再发布任何内容
Never blogging again?