虹桥旅馆（2018）

from a smokestack to know what's killing me.
听我说 烟囱啊
listen, i'm talking smokestacks--
烟囱啊 在我们的婚礼上
i'm talking smokestacks on our wedding.
嗨 这就是你们的房♥间
hi. that's your room.
彩色电视你们喜欢吧？
you like color tv?
天啊 他们知不知道同志情侣是要睡一起的？
wow. they are aware that gay people sleep together, right?
可能是简·西摩尔“开放的心”系列吧
maybe it's a part of the jane seymour open heart collection.
应该是洛克赫德森“未出的柜”系列收藏吧
more like the rock hudson closeted collection.
哇
wow!
真的吗
are you really looking at this?
我不想这么说
i hate to say it,
但这不就是我一直在找的
but this is the exact "aesthetic from branson" pub
酒馆的设计灵感吗
that i've been looking for, isn't it?
-太正宗了 -什么？
- it's completely authentic. - what?
凤♥凰♥城周边2000英里内
there's not a place within 2,000 miles of phoenix
-哪有像这样的地方啊 -那真是谢天谢地哦
- that looks like this. - thank god!
大家都渴望亲眼看看这幅世纪中叶工业化的景象
everyone wants to capture this mid-century industrial look,
而我们正好在它的中心！
and we're in its epicenter.
你竟然还在为这地方说好话
you're not defending this place.
我没有 我只是发表了意见
no, i'm just making a comment.
达伦 达伦
darren, darren,
这里简直无法接受
this is completely unacceptable.
你懂吗
you understand that, right?
懂吗？
right?
你看看外面那些管道的绕法
look at the way the pipes wind around.
这可是别人见不到的
that's never captured.
它的荒凉甚至有种独特的美
there's even beauty to its strange desolation.
你特马真会跟我唱反调
you are so fucking with me right now.
我是设计师啊 迪恩
i'm a designer, dean.
你就别在我耳边唠叨
you've gotta let go of all the negative connections
别人对这里的负面见解了 好吗
that everyone's lapped on it.
什么见解？比如这里弥漫着癌症 无助 死亡？
what, like cancer, hopelessness, death?
明明是充满着无畏 进步 和创新
like boldness, like progress, innovation.
这才不是绝望的废墟
these are not remnants of despair,
而是人类历史上最伟大的几个世纪的遗迹
but relics of one of the greatest centuries in human history.
-我的天啊！ -怎么了
- oh, my god! - what?
我的尿比幻彩荧光漆还黄！
my pee is day-glo yellow.
就是那种吃了一大堆维生素之后的颜色
like after you take a ton of vitamins,
但我明明没有吃
but i haven't taken any vitamins!
都怪这里的空气 水
it's this air and this water
这里的剪刀石头布！
this rock, paper, scissors!
看啊 美就在这里
look. it's there.
看个鬼
i'm not looking.
光闻闻都已经够了
believe me, smelling is more than enough.
这就是那个同性套餐的资料？
is that the queerpon printout?
-别抢 -我去搞定
- no. - i'm fixing this.
简直太吹牛了
this is completely inaccurate.
说好了有神秘迷雾呢？震耳欲聋的瀑布声呢？
where are the magical mists? where are the thundering rapids?
对不起
i'm so sorry.
给您换个房♥间吧？
another room?
换个房♥间……
another room--
你给我换条命吧
another chance at life.
给您升级 全新的房♥间
we upgrade. brand new room.
视野也更好
better view. yes.
什么视野？
better view of what?
有毒矿井的吗？
the toxic sludge pit outside?
我要求退全款! 尼亚加拉瀑布呢？
i demand a full refund. where's niagara falls?
啊
ah!
这里就是尼亚加拉瀑布
this is niagara falls.
这里是尼亚加拉瀑布市
it's actually the city of niagara falls.
对 你看
yes, uh, here.
对 都在这里
yeah, it's all right here.
惊艳的尼亚加拉瀑布
stunning niagara falls,
美国工业化早期城市之一
one of the early great industrial cities of america.
一切都归功于尼克拉·特斯拉的想象力和奋斗
all powered by nikola tesla's imagination and dedication
他致力于利用尼亚加拉瀑布
to harnessing the great, mighty niagara
为工业提供动力
to power the industrial monuments
这一切一起构成了
that comprise the stunning views
虹桥旅馆的美丽风景
of the rainbow bridge motel.
多美呀
it is glorious.
你从哪儿读来的？
where are you reading that?
-这里 -啊 夹缝里啊
- right here. - oh, on the side margin.
谁会把这里的内容当成真实有效的信息？
no one accepts that as valid, functional online real estate.
我的平板电脑甚至都不显示这里
my ipad can't even read that.
我肯定 你的婚礼会很棒的
i assure you, you are going to have a wonderful wedding.
我向你保证
i give you my word.
我们的床也被从中分开了
our bed appears to be cut in half.
我马上就去找萨压 他会摆好的
i'm talking to saya right now. he's gonna fix it.
他年纪这么大了
you know, look, he's an old man.
不太能理解这些 但他也是好心帮忙嘛
he didn't understand, and he was just trying to help.
哪里帮忙了？
how does that help anything?
他看到两个男人 理解得和大家不一样
he sees two men. he doesn't understand like the others.
比如刚才那司机？搞90年代迪斯科镭射灯同志骄傲秀？
like the driver and his '90s disco ball laser pride show.
好吧 看来你并不喜欢啊
really, you didn't-- you didn't like that, huh?
抱歉 打扰一下
excuse me, i hate to bother you both,
我们房♥间的冰箱坏了
but our refrigerator in our room isn't working
但这个东西必须保证是凉的
and it's important that this stays cold.
这是我的药
it's my medicine.
没问题 我马上把它放到我们的冰箱里
yeah, no problem. we'll just put this in the back office fridge,
还有 你应该很骄傲
and you should be very proud.
对吧？哦 呃
right, uh-- oh.
帮我们互相介绍一下
introduce us, please.
哦 这位是……
oh, this is, um...
-迪恩 -我叫卢塞尔
- dean. - russell.
我们俩都开心死了
we're both so happy.
谢谢您 婚礼很完美
thank you. it was perfect.
别忘了在网站上给我们好评哦
don't forget to give us a big high ranking on queerpon.
明天我们要搞个接待派对
we're having our reception party tomorrow.
希望你们都来
could always use a few more bodies.
现在能付余款了吗
should we pay the balance now?
没问题 可以了
no problem. yeah.
好吧 我一会儿再回来
yeah, well, i'm gonna come back later.
你们想升级另一间房♥的话也是可以的
you know, i could always upgrade you to the father of the brady bunch room.
那间超级棒的
i am telling you, it's spectacular.
视野也很好
it's a great corner view.
这季节想住的人多着呢
this time of year, people are request it all the time.
宝贝 我回来了
honey, i'm home.
我失败了 现在轮到你了 带我们离开这里吧
well, i failed. now it's your turn to get us out of here.
我的天 不是吧 你就已经把行李拿出来了？
oh, god, what are you doing? you are not unpacking.
没有 不是 但
no. no, but...
我已经画出了酒馆的设计稿
i do have the design for the pub.
-你看 -哇你把它设计成垃圾堆了
- look. - oh, you're gonna make it a shithole.
除了暴露在外的输风管和砖块
there's so much more to this industrial look
这里还有太多工业之美
than exposed air ducts and brick.
你看这些管道衔接处
look at these large joints,
不同的管道把不同的东西都聚集在一起
the different pipes that join everything together,
这些金属的颜色
the various metallic shades.
啊 我的脑中充满灵感！
oh, my brain is firing off.
你能从这个破烂地方当中找到灵感
i'm glad that you got all this creative inspiration
我很开心
from that giant mess out there,
但我们不能住在这里
but we are not staying here.
嗯
mmm.
你认真的吗 拜托 拜托
really? hello. hello. just--
别抢 会撕烂的
oh, no, don't-- you're gonna rip it.
-达伦 -行 -好的 好的
- darren-- okay. - okay, okay.
你真的该看看四周 -看不到它的美吗？
you need to look at it. -Can't you see it?
我关心的是我们婚礼美不美
i care more about the look of our wedding,
而不是一帮凤♥凰♥城嬉皮
not what a bunch of drunken phoenix hipsters think
喝到烂醉然后开始醒酒的时候
as they try to get their body temperature
会怎么看待这个地方
down to a comfortable 107.
行吧 得了 行