二流警探（2010）
The Other Guys
Part 18
Oct. 21, 2020, 1:51 p.m.
但是我没有钱 今天是我生日
but I don't have any money and it's my birthday.
我能把这只鸭子给您 然后和您做♥爱♥吗
"Do you think I could have sex with you for this duck?"
-他是个农民吗 -不是
- Was he a farmer? - No.
这是简直破坏公共卫生
That's probably a Health Code violation,
把一只鸭子带去卖♥♥淫的场所
bringing a duck into a place of prostitution.
他们不是要和鸭子做♥爱♥
They weren't gonna have sex with the duck!
不是 我只是觉得
No, I just mean Health Code violation
把鸭子带去那样的地方会破坏公共卫生
to have the duck brought into a facility like that.
不管怎样 她说 好吧我愿意
So, anyway, she says, "Yes, I'll do it."
所以他进了妓院 给了她
So he goes in there, gives it to her.
-给了她什么 -又爽又刺♥激♥的性♥爱♥啊 她很喜欢
- He gives her what? - The high, hard one! She loves it.
所以她说 如果你再跟我做一次
She goes, "You know what? If you do that again,
我就把你的鸭子还给你
I'll give you your duck back."
-所以他免费得到了两次服务 -等等 不好意思
- It's like getting laid twice for free. - So... I'm sorry.
不好意思
I'm so sorry.
-你是说鸭子是用来为这服务付费的 -没错
- The duck is payment for sexual intercourse. - Yes. Yes.
-很好 -他用这只鸭子付钱
- Very good. - He used the duck as payment,
现在他的鸭子又还回来了
and now he's being paid back the duck.
他说 我的天哪
He goes, "Oh, my God, this is
这是最棒的生日 于是他又和妓♥女♥做了一次
the greatest birthday ever." He does it again.
现在他要回家了 对不对
Now he's walking home, right?
-正走着... -所以她满意于用鸭子付费
- Walking... - So she was satisfied with duck.
-用鸭子作为流通资金 -没错
- With a duck as currency... - Yes.
付给她 很好 很好
to her. Great. Good.
所以他走路回家
So he's walking home, now he
他等不及要回去告诉他父亲发生的这一切
can't wait to get home to tell his father. Right?
他带着鸭子在路上走着
He's walking down the street with the duck,
突然之间 轰地一声
and all of a sudden, voom,
一辆卡车把鸭子碾死了
truck comes by and runs over his duck.
-鸭子死了吗 -鸭子死了
- Kills the duck? - Killed the duck.
-所以鸭子现在死了 -鸭子现在已经死了
- So the duck is now dead. - The duck is dead.
这个小孩嚎啕大哭 卡车司机停下车
The kid starts crying, truck driver stops,
他觉得很不安 他不是故意的...
he's all upset, he didn't mean...
小孩当然要哭了
Of course he's crying!
他才13岁 刚刚有了两次性经验
He's a 13-year-old boy who's just had sex, twice,
现在又眼看着自己深爱的鸭子死了
and he watched his beloved duck die.
你能闭上嘴让我讲完吗
Will you shut up and let me tell the story?
我到现在都没听出有啥好笑的地方
So far, I don't know how this is ever gonna be funny.
这个司机为碾死鸭子而感到很难过
The guy feels so bad about killing the duck,
他就给了那小孩两美元
he gives him two dollars.
两美元就让那小孩开心了吗
And the kid's happy with the two bucks?
他开心极了 他免费上了两次床
He's ecstatic! He got laid twice,
现在还得了两美元
and now he's got two dollars on top of it.
我觉得一只鸭子不止值两美元吧
Seems like a duck would be worth a lot more than two dollars.
这是以前的故事 我是说
This was a while back. You what I'm...
他回到家里 他父亲问他 发生什么事了
So he goes home, his dad goes, "What happened? What happened?
快告诉我 他说 爸爸 我靠这只鸭子搞了一次
"Tell me! Tell me!" He goes, "Dad, I got a fuck for the duck,
又再搞一次换回了鸭子
"I got a duck for the fuck,
现在还因为这只被搞死的鸭子拿到了两块钱
"And I got two bucks for a fucked-up duck!"
听着像是打油诗
So it's like a limerick.
所以你不觉得好笑对吧
You didn't think that was funny?
我觉得后面有点儿趣味 确实如此
I thought it was entertaining at the end, sure,
把这些词组合在一起
the way all the words were put together,
但是如果说内容的话
but in terms of content?
确实不好笑
No.
去找审审要咱们的账单 然后就走吧
Get the check-check from Shen-Shen. Let's get out of here.
停下 停下 停下
Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.
卡
And cut.
二流警探（2010）
The Other Guys
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