丧日少女（2020）

亲爱的 你的专业是什么来着
What was your major again, sweetie?
不是不是 她没有专业的 妈妈
No no, she doesn't have a major, Mom.
她装的呢 但是你有证书的 对吧
She makes it up, but you like got a diploma, right?
我想是政♥治♥
I think it was politics.
我现在在努力想我是不是认识人
Now I'm trying to think if I know anybody.
我一直记得呢 你从小到大
I always remember you were such
都是一个人道主义者
an humanitarian growing up.
是的 你想去参加那趟旅程
Yes. You wanted to go on that trip
给流浪的人食物 去东方教英语
and feed the homeless and teach English in the Orient.
我的专业是 透视下的女性
My major was sort of like women
以及性别研究
and gender studies through the lens-
哦 所以你可以戴着粉色♥猫♥咪帽子去游♥行♥咯
Oh, so you could run marches like with the pink pussy hats.
对 确实 多好的主意啊是吧
Yes, exactly, that's such a good idea, right?
你喜欢游♥行♥又喜欢编织
You love to march and you love to knit.
我们的朋友Steve Epstein 他的儿子就像你一样
Our friend, Steve Epstein, his son was like you.
他学的是啥来着 哲学还是摄影来着
He was studying what, philosophy or photography.
反正就这类的
One of those things.
自然地 他的父母十分担忧他的未来
And his parents were terrified, naturally, about his future.
我是说 他要怎么挣钱啊
I mean, how's he going to make any money?
是吧
Right?
不过呢 二十年后 他成为了脑外科医生
But I mean, 20 years later, he's a brain surgeon.
谁说得准的事儿呢
You never know.
是啊 说不准的事儿
Yeah, you never know.
也许你也会成为一名脑外科医生
You may end up being a brain surgeon.
是啊
Yeah.
啊Sheila 我来吧
Oh Sheila, I can do that.
－什么 －我来做这事儿吧
What? I can take that for you.
啊你真好 谢谢你亲爱的
Oh, you are so lovely. Thank you, darling.
Eli把小孩子的卧室吐了一地
Eli vomited all over the kids'room.
没事的
It's okay.
－那儿脏得很 －好 我知道
It's a mess in there. Yeah, I got it.
好 谢谢
Okay, thank you.
太好了 保姆来救场
Perfect, babysitter to the rescue
真是太好了
That's so sweet.
你真贴心
You're a darling.
－我可以帮你 －不用了
I can help you. It's fine.
不是 我想去
No, I want to.
真是些好姑娘
Such nice girls.
真是些好姑娘
我的天啊
Oh my God.
为什么会有人把孩子带来葬礼啊
Why do people even bring kids to shivas?
来 我帮你 别把这玩意儿沾身上了
Here, let me help you. I don't want to get it on you.
谢谢
Thanks.
我之前在做一个App
I was trying to build an app for.
你之前没穿过紧身裤吗
Weren't you wearing tights before?
对
No.
没穿过
No?
等等 你怎么在流血
Wait, why are you bleeding?
你也知道 我…
As you know, I.
真的挺整洁
Really neat.
只是被什么东西卡了一下 没事的
It just got caught in something, it's fine.
呃 你的腿上开了个口啊
Well, you have an open wound on your leg.
呢 你的腿上开了个口啊
是刮伤啦
It's a scratch.
你为什么一直看那边
Why do you keep looking over there?
－看哪儿 －那个瘦瘦的金发女人那边
Where? At the skinny blonde woman.
我没有在看她
I'm not looking at her.
好吧她确实很美但是配你太老了
Okay, she's very pretty, but she's too old for you.
我可没觉得她美
I don't think she's pretty.
Malibu Barbie不美吗
Malibu Barbie's not pretty?
我的意思是说 她还凑合
I mean she's just like basic, y'know?
就一般长相吧
Like she's just like generic looking.
就一般好看的那种
She's like generic pretty.
她可能是我见过的最美的人
She's possibly the most beautiful person I've ever seen
说真的吗你
Seriously?
我是说 我不会喜欢她这种的
I just wouldn't be into her is what I'm saying.
她就是我十五年后想要成为的那种人
She has like the essence I want in 15 years.
怎么说
What,
无趣的那种吗
like boring?
刻薄 而且
Boring wife who.
没有性生活的女人
doesn't have sex and is like.. mean.
没啊 她像是那种性感的商业女性
No, she's like a hot businesswoman,
丧偶式育儿 所以压力很大 但是外人看不出
basically a single mom, so stressed out but you can't tell
差不多就 标杆吧
It's like, goals.
－她不是商业女性 －不对 就是
- She's not a businesswoman. - Yeah, she is.
她是一个企业家
She's an entrepreneur.
没 有不是
No, she's not.
是的啊 我妈妈跟我说她有三门生意
Yeah, my mom told me she has like three businesses.
但是正如我所说的
But that's what I'm saying,
外人看不出来 因为她很低调
you can't tell because she's so chill about it.
为啥要做三门生意
Why does she have three?
是因为全都失败了吗
Did they all just like fail?
好吧 你作为一个未来的女性游♥行♥组织者
Okay, you're projecting like a lot of misogyny
说出来的话却这么厌女
for a future woman's march organizer.
怎么回事儿
What's goin'on?
－什么样的公♥司♥ －差不多停业了
What kinda company? It's like a stop-down.
什么来着
What's that?
是什么样的公♥司♥
What kind of company was it?
抱歉
Excuse me.
你怎么了
What are you?
没事 谢谢你帮我
Nothing, thank you for helping me.
你真是奇怪
You're being so weird.
我没啥奇怪的
I'm not being weird.
-嗨 见到你很高 -嗨mazel tov
- Hi, so good to see you. - Hi, mazel tov.
－好了 好 －再见
-Okay, yeah. - Bye.
过来这儿
Come here.
怎么 你拽我♥干♥嘛啊
What? Why are you dragging me?
我还以为你是素食主义者
I thought you were a vegetarian.
我是啊 你想让我吃东西 这话不是你说的吗
I am, you said that, you said that you wanted me to eat.
你现在的行为举动让人完全无法接受
Your behavior right now is completely unacceptable.
行 我觉得你不要激动
Okay, I think you need to relax.
别跟我说这些
Don't you tell me to relax.
你见谁都要调情
You are flirting with everyone.
你牛饮红酒
You are chugging wine.
你坐在桌子上
You are sitting on a table.
干嘛啊你 来聚会吗
What is this, a party?
我不是跟你说了 别再跟Maya胡搞了
And I thought I told you no funny business with Maya.
我不知道这是啥意思
I don't know what that means.
啊你明明懂的
Oh yes you do.
别跟我装傻
Don't play dumb with me.
我以为你的尝试已经结束了
I thought you were done experimenting.
你觉得所有的双性恋都是在尝试
You think everyone that's bi is experimenting.
你懂什么 你根本就没有同性雷达
You don't know anything.You have zero gaydar.
小朋友 你说啥
Excuse me, kid?
我可是经历过80年代纽约生活的人
I lived through New York in the '80s.
我的同性雷达信♥号♥♥强得很
My gaydar is strong as a bull.
－瞧瞧这腰 －哦天呐
Look at this waist! Oh my God.
嗨亲爱的 你的单车运动课如何
Hi darling, how was spin class?
啊还不错 还是瞧瞧这个人
Oh, it was good, but look at this one.
她不吃东西的吗
Is she not eating?
－是吧 －她减了多少斤
Right? - How much does she weigh?
你减了多少
How much you weigh?
呃 我不知道
Uh, I don't know.
哎 得了吧
Oh, come on.
你想让我上称吗
Do you want me to get on a scale?
你真有 趣瞧瞧这喉结
You're so funny, look at this punum
没事啦
You're okay.
谁他妈把孩子带来葬礼了啊
Who the fuck brings a baby to a shiva?
她不懂规矩 她不是犹太人
She doesn't know, she's not Jewish.
什么意思 你不是说她信犹太教了吗
What do you mean, you told me she converted?
还皈依呢
Converted, shmerted,