大男孩清醒路（2018）

That leaves us with Jeff.
你的情况很艰难 伙计
Yours is tough, man.
你的问题很棘手
Yours is tough because,
坦白地说 你偏离轨道太多
honestly, the extent of how far off track you went.
我的意思是 你现在回归了你之前的生活
I mean, it's the life you led before.
唯一的区别是你现在还没有开始注射毒品
The only difference is you're not injecting yet.
犯法 撒谎
Breaking the law, lying,
想要什么就拿什么
taking what you want when you want, how you want.
你和你女儿的情况
Your situation with your girls.
我已经给克里斯汀·安托里尼打过电♥话♥了 我问她 有商量的余地吗
I've already called Kristen Antolini, and I asked her, "Is there any leeway?"
她必须和法官讨论
She has to talk to the judge,
但是她认为你可以最晚可以延期到1月中下旬
but she thinks you could have until mid-to-late January
为自己找点帮助
to stretch this out and get yourself some help.
问题是 你要从哪里得到帮助
Question is, where are you going to get that help?
你想要什么 杰夫
What do you want, Jeff?
没什么
Nothing.
不要我们的帮助吗
No help with us?
-不要帮助 -我已经搞砸了 老兄
-No help... -I'm already fucked, dude.
我只想要我的女儿们回来 伙计
I just want my girls, dude.
喝酒 我把一切都搞得很糟糕
Drinking, you know what I mean, fucked it all up.
现在我不可能接回她们了
Now I ain't gonna get 'em.
等我再去戒毒出来的时候
By the time I go there and get out,
我已经没有时间找工作 没有能力把她们带回家了
I ain't had no time to get on my feet, get 'em home.
不管怎样 一切都完蛋了
It'll be over with, anyways.
所以我基本上是全都搞砸了
So I'm basically fucked all around,
就因为我喝了一点酒
because I chose to drink a little bit.
我们见过了最好的你和最坏的你
We've seen the best you and the worst,
而现在 我看到的是那个“去他的”版杰夫
and right now, it's like this "fuck it" Jeff.
如果我是你 我不会说“去他的”
I don't say, "Fuck it," if I'm you.
我会说“我该怎么办”
I say, "What do I do?"
去做眼下最正确的事
Do the next right thing in front of my face
并向上帝祈祷 我们能得到好结果
and hope to God that somehow that we can continue to work this.
就是这样 伙计
This is it, man.
我是说 如果你现在逃避
I mean, if you run away from this right now,
你永远也不能带她们回家
you're never getting them back.
你知道的
You know that.
我已经他妈的厌倦了搬家
I'm tired of fucking moving.
我知道 妈妈 但我是个大男孩了
I know, Mom, but I'm a big boy.
有时我必须经历这些挣扎才能到达彼岸
Sometimes I gotta go through these struggles to get to the other side.
我会试着解决的 妈妈
I mean, I'm gonna try to figure it out, Mom.
嘿 伙计 怎么了 你还好吗？
Hey, man, what's up? How you been, dude?
我知道喝酒是件很严重的事 但这就像...
I know drinking's a big fucking deal, you know what I mean, but it's like...
我不知道 我不知道该怎么说
I don't know. I don't know how to say it the right way.
你不该喝酒 对 你就不该喝酒
You shouldn't drink, yeah, you shouldn't, you know?
在你喝酒的时候 就不该做愚蠢的事
You shouldn't do stupid shit, when you've been drinking...
这又不是我们出去吸毒
It's not like we went out and banged dope,
不是去做以前的恶习
went back to the same old shit.
是的 但如果你的生活因为酗酒而变得难以管理
Yeah, but if your life's become unmanageable because of your drinking,
即使只是时间管理
even if it's just scheduling.
即使是不能按时回家 也没有在宵禁前回家
Even if it's just not being on time, not being home for curfew.
即使没有其他的事情发生 喝酒也会让这一切发生
Even if none of the other shit happened, drinking's making that shit happen,
或者是聚会 总体上看哪种生活方式
or partying, the lifestyle in general.
我搬回来和我妈暂时住在一起
I moved back in with my mom for a short period of time,
不去想明尼阿波利斯的事
and forgot about the Minneapolis thing.
我打电♥话♥给我的老板 问我是否还能继续上班
I called my boss and asked if I can still have my job,
有没有安排交通和住宿的地方
if I had transportation and a place to stay out here,
他说 是啊 星期一滚回来工作吧
and he said, "Yeah, get your ass back to work Monday.
到时候见
I'll see you then."
那时候我就做了决定
My decision was made right then.
自己付账单 我喜欢这么做
Paying the bills and I like it.
过来 奶牛
Here, cows.
快点 过来
Come on, come here.
-好姑娘 -过来
-Good girl. -Come here!
好 好
Yep, yep!
我以前从来没有工作那么努力过
It's the hardest I've ever worked before.
我不知道该做什么
I don't know what to do.
我迷失在自己的小世界里了
I'm lost in my own little world.
但我最后会走出来的
But I'll figure it out eventually.
祈祷上帝 赐予我们平常心
God, grant us the serenity
接受无法改变的事情 有勇气去改变我们能改变的事情
to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can,
并有智慧去分辨两者的不同
and the wisdom to know the difference.
今天 我请来一位朋友 阅读12个步骤
Just for you today, I've asked a friend to read "The 12 Steps."
我是拉什 我是个瘾君子
I'm Rush and I'm an addict.
嗨 拉什
Hi, Rush.
第一 我们承认我们对付毒瘾无能为力
One, we admitted we were powerless over our addiction,
我们的生活变得难以自我管理
our lives have become unmanageable.
第二 相信比我们本身更强大的力量
Two, came to believe a power greater than ourselves
可以让我们恢复理智
could restore us to sanity.
第八 列出了所有我们伤害过的人的清单
Eight, we made a list of all persons we had harmed,
并甘愿对他们进行补偿
and became willing to make amends to them all.
第九 尽可能直接补偿这些人
Nine, we made direct amends to such people wherever possible,
除非这样做会伤害他们或其他人
except when to do so would injure them or others.
把它给我 你不需要它
Give me that. You don't need it.
我不在乎 你不再需要这个了
I don't care. You don't get no more.
杰夫目前没有工作 与他的丈母娘和两个女儿生活在一起
不 你喝够了
No, you've had enough.
你把它弄得到处都是 我不会再给你了
You done spilled it everywhere. You ain't getting no more.
-我会收拾好的 -我不管你会怎么做
-I'll shut it. -I don't care what you're gonna do.
-做一个火车轨道 -不要 快停下来
-Making a train track. -Don't! Quit!
我只是想要更多的水
I just want more water!
-不 不行 我来做 去 -不
-No you won't. I'll do it. Go! -No!
我还没为此准备好 我没有
I'm nowhere near ready for this. I'm not.
-真恶心 -拿去
- Yuck. - Here.
不然就什么都没得吃
Then don't eat nothing at all.
你不能光选择你想要的
You don't get to pick what you want.
我在铺石膏板 我的老板过来拜访 我女儿也在
I was finishing drywall, and my boss shows up and I have a kid here.
他说 你没去工作吗 我说 没人照看她
He's like, "You going to work?" I said, "I have nobody to watch her."
他就告诉我他不需要我了
And he's basically told me he don't need me.
他砰的一声关上了门 走了
He slammed his door and left.
我得离开这个小镇 伙计
I need to get out of this town, man.
她们在这里很好
They're in a good home here.
有地方住 有车接送
They got a roof over their head, transportation.
有人在意她们 爱她们
Someone feeds them, loves them.
你知道吗？
You know?
我现在还没有这些
I don't got none of that right now.
我得到了她们的爱 仅此而已
I got the love, but that's about it.
所以
You know? So...
自从离开雅各布之梯后 这几天我越来越想吸毒
I thought more about getting high this past day
比以往任何一天都想
than I have since I've been out of Jacob's Ladder.
这就是爱的小屋吗
This the love shack?
是的 让我们关上这扇门
Yeah, let's shut this door.
暖气太贵了 真是难以置信
My heat is so expensive, it's unbelievable.
十天以后就是我入狱一周年的日子
Ten days from now marks my one year that I was in jail.
一年前的我十天之后就会进监狱
I went to jail ten days from today...
嗯
Mm-hmm.
所以这就像是 我的生活完全反转了
...so it's like, my life is completely flipped around.
-是啊 -我是说 之前我无家可归
-Yeah. -I mean, I was homeless, man.
我和吸毒的人打交道有一段时间了
I've been around the addiction world for a while, and...
我真的注意到你现在看起来更瘦了
You know, I did notice that you look skinnier now.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
我现在很健康
I'm pretty fit right now.
我能跑上九层楼梯
You know what I mean? I can run up nine flights of stairs.
我不知道 我只想过我自己的生活
I don't know. I just want to live my life.
你知道 我有 就像
You know, and I have, like...
有些人到我家来 让我回到雅各布之梯
people showing up at my house asking me to come back to Jacob's Ladder,
因为 你知道 我没能通过大♥麻♥的毒品测试
because, you know, I failed a drug test for weed,
这就像 伙计
and it's like, dude...
我就不应该从雅各布之梯买♥♥下那辆车
so I should never have bought that car from Jacob's Ladder.
你们没有就验尿测试达成一致吗？
Did you all make an agreement? On taking piss tests
以他们资助你那辆车和其他东西为条件？
with the vehicle and stuff, since he financed it for you?
他让我签了一份合同 随时要对我进行验尿测试
He made me sign a contract that said I had to piss anytime he wants me