大男孩清醒路（2018）

有一天我回到家 我媳妇儿正在吸海♥洛♥因♥
I came home one day, and my wife was using heroin.
我很快也爱上了海♥洛♥因♥
I fell in love with it pretty quick.
渐渐的一包变成一克
One bag of dope turned into a gram of dope.
一克变成两克
One gram turned into two grams.
你吸食得越多 为了维持那种快♥感♥你必须吸得更多
The more you do, the more you had to do to get that same high.
我从没指望自己能活到25岁
I never expected to live to be 25.
我不能停止吸食
I can't not use.
如果我不吸 就会生病
If I don't use, I'm going to be sick.
我今年19岁 一天要吃五片扑热息痛
I'm 19 years old, I was up to five Percocets a day.
我没有工作
I didn't have a job.
我无家可归
I was homeless.
我觉得世界根本就不需要我
I felt like the world didn't need me.
我第一次抽烟的时候好像是在高中
I probably was in high school the first time I smoked crack.
在那之后不久 我开始吸食海♥洛♥因♥
Did heroin not too long after that.
我从没想过要去戒毒所
I'd never really wanted to be in rehab.
我的很多朋友戒毒一次又一次地失败 家人也是如此
Too many of my friends failed over and over again and family members.
我认为毒品和酒精
I thought drugs and alcohol...
就是我生长的环境了
That's what I grew up around, yeah?
我认为这也是每个人生活的方式
I thought that was just the way everybody lived.
我不知道有人过着清醒的生活
I didn't know people lived life sober.
片名：大男孩清醒路
这部影片在18个月内随访了四名对阿片类药物成瘾的男性
他们开始在极光西弗吉尼亚州梯级康复中心戒毒
嘿 查德
Hey, Chad.
-你好吗 -我是杰夫
-How are you? -I'm Jeff.
-见过杰夫 -杰夫 我是查德·毕夏普
-Meet Jeff. -Jeff. Chad Bishop.
很高兴见到你
Nice to meet you.
-兴奋吗 -是的 我很兴奋
-Excited? -Yeah, I'm really excited.
很好 这很棒
That's good, that's great.
杰夫是戒毒所的第一个成员 从监狱出来后参加为期六个月戒毒计划
开始吧 伙计 第一个
Fired up, man. Number one!
第一个
Number one!
你还好吗
How's it going?
你们东西都要带齐了吗
You guys got anything to carry in?
没有 他手里拿着的就是所有的东西
No, he's got everything he's got right there in his hands.
-好吧 好吧 -地方不错
- All right. All right. - Nice place.
我们开业那天 还在装♥修♥呢
We were still working on it when we opened up.
-哇 不错 -同样的浴室 同样的设计
-Wow. Nice. -Same bathroom, same way.
这是你的房♥间
This is yours.
-这是我的房♥间 -你想睡哪张床
-This is mine. -Which bed do you want?
-这张 -好的
-This one. -All right.
你应该看看我睡过的垫子
You should see the mat I was sleeping on.
我知道那种感觉
I know the feeling.
就像睡在毛巾上一样
It's like sleeping on a towel.
是的 这些床都很舒适 试试
Yeah, these are comfortable beds. Try it out.
是的 伙计 这太棒了
Yeah, man, this is awesome.
他昨天为了他的女儿们去参加了法庭听证会
He had his court hearing yesterday for his girls,
因为他要来这
and because he was coming up here,
他们延长了他的缓刑期
they extended his period,
所以他们还没有把他的女儿从他身边带走 所以
so they didn't take his girls away from him yet, so...
-那很好 -她们现在多大了 一岁和三岁
-That's good. -How old are they now? One and three?
-两岁和三岁 -好的
-Two and three. -Okay.
-你结婚多久了 -我20岁就结婚了
-How long have you been married? -Since I was 20.
真的吗 你现在25岁？
Really? You're 25?
-到六月份我就26岁了 -26岁？
-In June, I turn 26. -Twenty-six?
-有没有帮派关系什么的 -没有
-No gang affiliations, anything like that? -No.
非常好
Very good.
基本上 明天我们会叫你起床 让你吃饱
Tomorrow basically, we'll wake you up, get you fed,
然后我们会去农场喂动物
and then we're going to go over to the farm and feed the animals,
在那边做一些农活
do a little bit of work over there.
晚上六七点左右
Evening time, around six, seven o'clock,
会是你自己参加学♥习♥班♥的一些时间
that would be some of your time for educational classes.
你已经来这45分钟了 你正式成为了我们的元老级住客了
You've been here about 45 minutes. You're officially our senior resident.
-责任重大 -是啊
- It's a lot of responsibility. - Yeah!
-我来了 这就是我 -没错
- Here I am, that's me. - You're it.
我是说 如果这都不能让你有新的想法
I mean, if that doesn't give you a new perspective,
我就不知道怎样才能有了
I don't know what will.
创办了好几家急救中心之后 凯文·布兰肯希普博士开办了雅各布之梯 一个农场住宿型的戒毒所
住在这里的人不会和外部世界有太多的接触
The guys won't have a lot of outside world contact,
除非在监督之下
unless it's supervised.
你真的希望让这些人不再被孤立
You really want to kind of keep the guys from isolating,
因为这就是他们之前的生活
because that's kind of where their life's been.
只有他们和毒品
It's been them and their drug.
农业生活是一系列的进步和挫折组成的
Farming life is a series of advances and a couple of setbacks,
他们将会能够体验到那种清醒
and they'll be able to experience that kind of stuff sober.
生活并不总是完美的 并不总是美好的
Life's not always going to be perfect, it's not always going to be good,
你必须学会忍♥受痛苦和挫折
and you have to learn to live with pain and setbacks,
不要让毒品来控制你
without having drugs to dampen it for you.
早上好 伙计们
Morning, guys.
-早上好 马克 -你怎么样
-Morning, Mark. -How are you doing?
非常好
Fantastic.
你以前和动物一起工作过吗
You ever worked with animals before? Have you?
-嗯 我外公有个小农场 -农场？好的
-Yeah, my papa had a little farm. -A farm? Okay.
这些都是要放到在草场上去的
These are the ones that are gonna go out on pasture.
你可以把这个放在他面前
You can just stick it in front of him.
他至少应该能吃一会儿
He should at least for a while.
把它往上提 很好
Tip it up. There you go.
-看起来你以前做过 -是的
- You look like you've done it. - Yeah.
好的
Okay.
这是我的弟弟本尼
This is my brother Benny.
他现在吸食海♥洛♥因♥和冰♥毒♥很严重
He's on heroin and meth real bad right now.
那是亚伦 我妈妈的男朋友约翰 现在已经是她丈夫了
That's Aaron, my mom's boyfriend John, the one she's married to now.
那是他吸毒过量的儿子
That's his son that ODed.
他已经去世了 那是我的弟弟AJ
He's passed away, and that's my brother AJ.
现在他在坐牢
Which is locked up in prison
因为抢劫了摩根城萨布拉顿的哈迪斯餐厅
for robbing Hardee's in Sabraton, Morgantown,
为了凑钱去买♥♥毒品和其他什么的
to get drugs and stuff.
那是我妹妹
That's my sister,
我妈妈和我妹的两个孩子
my mom and her two kids,
但她没有抚养过他们
but she don't have nothing to do with them.
她现在正在逃避法律的制裁
She's on the run from the law right now.
我妈妈在抚养这两个孩子
And my mom has both kids.
她们都很可爱
These are cute.
那是我的孩子
That's my kid.
她刚刚会走路
That's her when she just started walking.
对这些人 我都需要做很多补偿
Got a lot of amends to make to a lot of these people,
但我不知道他们是谁
but I don't know who they are.
这里的很多房♥子我都闯进去过
I've broken into a lot of these houses.
在我毒瘾发作的时候做的
I've gone through... in my addiction.
-有一些东西是你补偿不了的 -有一些是的
- There's some amends you just can't make. - There are some.
他们中的一些人 也许你可以写一封信 放进他们的邮箱里
Some of them, maybe you could write a letter, put it in their mailbox.
因为有些人 你去敲他们的门是有风险的
'Cause it would be risky knocking on the door, some of them,
告诉他们你做了什么 他们可能不会太友好
telling them what you did, they may not take too kindly to it.
特别是在这些地方 人们习惯带枪
Especially in these parts, people tend to carry guns with them.
是的 他们会射杀你
Yeah, they'll shoot you around here.
看到那座山上的教堂了吗
See that church way over on that hill?
-嗯 -我生父就埋在那里
- Yeah. - That's where my real dad's buried.
-真的吗 -是的
- Really? - Yeah.
-你了解他吗 -不 他去世的时候我只有三岁
-Did you ever know him? -No, I was three when he passed away.
-那时我妈妈也离开了 -发生了什么
-That's when my mom left. -What happened?
砍树时 一棵树倒在了爸爸的身上
A tree got cut down on Papa.
-真的吗 -是的
-Really? -Yeah.
-哇 -在一个伐木场
-Wow. -At a logging yard.
一年后 我妈妈离开了 去了一家酒吧 再也没有回过家
Then a year later, my mom left, went to a bar and never came home.
-你三岁时她就离开了 -三岁 是的
-So she left when you were three? -Three years old, yeah.
我十五六岁时她才回来
And didn't come back until I was 15 or 16.
天哪 她去哪了
Jeez! Where'd she go?
我不知道
I don't know.
我有时喜欢安静地坐在这
I like to sit here sometimes quietly.
就像当你嗨了的时候
Like, when you're, like, high and stuff,
你就不会去想
you don't really think about what...
你知道我的意思吧 你不会去
You know what I mean? You ain't got...
我醒来的第一件事是