短信情缘（2023）

Someone's smishing you.
是网络钓鱼 通过短♥信♥
Phishing, but by text.
首先他们引你上钩 然后要你的信♥用♥卡♥号♥码
First, they lure you in, then they ask for your credit card number.
-删掉吧 -好
-Delete it. -Yeah.
席琳 你现在可以说 比你出道的时候更受欢迎
Celine, you're arguably more popular today than when you started.
你认为你是如何保持 乐坛常青树的地位呢？
How do you think you've managed to stay relevant for so long?
问得好
What a question.
作为中年男性记者
Do you ever stop and ask yourself
你是否曾扪心自问 为什么人们继续读你的作品？
why people continue to read your work as a middle-aged male journalist?
也许是因为优秀的作品 永不过时 是吧？
Maybe it's because if the work is good, it's timeless. Yeah?
迪翁小姐
Miss Dion,
你上次在美国巡演 已经是十多年前的事了
it's been over a decade since you've toured in the States.
我很好奇 为什么现在再开一次？
I'm curious. Why now?
这五年来我过得很辛苦
For five years, it's been tough.
我抚养孩子们成长 而他们失去了父亲
Raising my children after the loss of their father,
也是我一生的挚爱 我的丈夫 雷内
the love of my life, my husband, Rene.
与此同时
And at the same time,
我不想只是坐在那里难过
I didn't want to just sit around and be sad.
所以我决定踏上旅程 做我热爱的事
So I decided to hit the road and do what I love.
（917-167-5309 心不在焉时 时间过得真慢）
可不是嘛
Tell me about it.
什么？
What was that?
没什么 我只是在回短♥信♥
Nothing. Just-- I was responding to a text.
-抱歉 -没事
-Sorry. -Cool.
如果我让你觉得无聊 你可以和朋友们聊聊
Feel free to talk with friends if I'm boring you.
不 不是的
No, no, no, it wasn't-- I mean...
这个算不上是朋友
I wouldn't say it was a friend.
（如果现在能和你赤身裸体在一起 我愿意付出一切）
你有问题要问我吗？
Do you have a question for me?
有 当然
Yes. Yeah, yeah. Sure.
迪翁小姐
Miss Dion...
席琳 你唱了很多关于爱的歌♥
Celine, you sing a lot about love, obviously.
比如在《就是这样》里 你唱道
For example, in "That's the Way It Is," you say:
“当你准备好出发 但内心充满疑惑
"When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt,
不要放弃你的信仰 爱会降临在相信它的人身上”
don't give up on your faith, love comes to those that believe it."
但在《当我坠入爱河》里
But in "When I Fall in Love,"
你唱道：“在这样不安定的世界里 爱情在开始之前
you say, "In a restless world like this, love is ended...
就结束了”
before it's begun."
问题是什么？
What's the question?
你真的相信你唱的那些内容吗？
Well, do you really believe in all these things you sing?
你显然对它一无所知
You obviously know nothing about it.
对什么？
What?
爱
Love.
席琳 你要带孩子们去巡演吗？
Celine, are you taking your children on tour with you?
你在给谁发短♥信♥？
Who are you texting?
没有谁
No one.
是你昨晚发短♥信♥的 那位“没有谁”吗？
This the same "no one" that you were texting last night?
是的
Yes, actually.
但相信我 完全不是你想的那样
But trust me, it's totally not what you think.
米拉 重新回归情场
Mira, there is nothing wrong
没什么不对的
with putting yourself back out there again.
天啊 别说了 我都不知道该从何说起
Oh, my God, stop, please, I wouldn't even know where to start.
你能这么说真是太好了
Well, it's kind of amazing that you say that
因为你妹妹 超爱你
because your sister, who loves you,
超级棒 支持你的妹妹
who's kind of awesome and got your back,
可能已经给你注册交友软体了
might have already started you on an app.
抱歉 什么？
Sorry, what?
-我讨厌那些软体！ -我知道
-I hate apps! -I know. I know.
交友软体最糟糕了 但是
They're the worst. But...
你很漂亮 很年轻 还有大好人生等着你
you're beautiful, young, and have your whole life ahead of you.
你不能放弃约会
You're not allowed to give up on dating.
你就随便看一下嘛
So just take a look.
什么？不行 我还没准备好
What? No, no. I'm not ready for this.
（莱恩 26岁）
（伊森 26岁）
（达米安 33岁）
为什么每个男人都光着膀子？
Okay, why is every guy shirtless?
我才不会跟这些男人说话
I wouldn't talk to any of these.
但你不用管 因为这个软体是Bumble
But you don't have to worry because it's Bumble.
女生才能主动出击
So the woman makes the first move.
你觉得如何？
What? What do you think?
不行吗？那这个呢？
No? What about this guy?
好 我们稍微向右滑一下
Okay. So we do a little right swipe.
-我没叫你滑 -等等 停
-Didn't tell you to swipe. -Wait. Stop.
第一个就匹配上 你怎么会这样？
It's a match on your first one. Who even are you?
拜托 这是好兆头
Come on, that is such a sign.
所以我们只要稍微打个招呼
So we just do a little "hey"
-看看他… -别给他发信息
-to see what he-- -Don't text him.
-停下 -你给他发信息了？
-Stop. -You texted him?
是的 天啊 他回信了
Yes. Oh, my God, he's texting back.
（不错的照片）
“不错的照片”
"Nice pic."
（你想去喝一杯吗？）
-“你想去喝一杯吗？” -不
-"Do you wanna go for a drink?" -No.
-好 太棒了！ -不
-Yes. It's amazing! -No.
听着 就当是为了我 你的妹妹
Look, just do it for me, your sister,
我非常非常爱你
who loves you so, so, so much.
-你开心 我就开心 -闭嘴
-Your happiness is my happiness. -Shut up.
-就喝一杯 -你要去吗？
-One drink. -You're gonna go?
-如果能让你闭嘴的话 -我保证
-If you shut up. -I promise.
就喝一杯
One drink.
-太主动了 -我知道
-So aggressive. -I know.
（纽约纪事报）
你好 罗伯
Hi, Rob.
你一直在看手♥机♥ 还在收到那些压抑的短♥信♥吗？
You're checking that phone a lot. Still getting those depressing texts?
-什么？ -丽莎告诉我的
-What? -Lisa told me.
你知道吗？我觉得听起来 并不像骗子
Know what? I don't think it sounds like a scammer at all.
真的吗？
Really?
更像是精神病跟踪狂
It sounds more like a psychotic stalker.
或者只是一个迷茫的老太太
Or just a really confused old lady.
不相信我吗？回短♥信♥吧
Don't believe me? Text them back.
我做不到 那些内容太私人了
I couldn't do that. They're too personal.
不管是谁发的 我都不想让对方难堪
Wouldn't want to embarrass whoever this was.
神经病奶奶又发来了？
Has psychotic grandma sent another one?
“猜猜谁今晚要去那个 糟糕的嬉皮士酒吧兰德兹？
"Guess who's going to that awful hipster bar Rendez tonight?
请别批评我 我已经觉得很内疚了
Please don't judge, I already feel so guilty.
而且我绝对没准备好
And I'm definitely not ready.
但我想如果我不强迫自己 我永远都不会准备好”
But I guess if I don't force myself, I'll never be."
那是个很棒的酒吧 我知道 也是很好的搭讪地点
Great bar. I know that. Good pick-up spot.
-我要去 -什么？去哪里？
-I'm going. -What? Where?
为什么？
Why?
你现在就要去？为什么？
You're going now? Why?
你总是让我出去约会
You're always telling me to get back out there.
对 确实
Yeah, no, this is true,
但这些短♥信♥是一个陌生人发的
but these are texts from a literal stranger.
是的 但这些短♥信♥让我很有感觉
Yeah, but they speak to me.
有感觉？
They speak to you?
不 你在做什么 罗伯？ 你说的话像疯了一样
No. What are you doing, Rob? You sound like an insane person right now.
我只是想找出 发这些短♥信♥的人 好吗？
Look, I just need to put a face to these texts, okay?
就这样
That's all.
你会跟他一起去吧？
You're gonna go with him, right?
对 好吧 谢谢
Yeah, right, okay. Thanks.
你觉得这样健康吗？
Do you think this is healthy?
你要怎么找出那个人？
How are you gonna know if it's even them or not?
我不知道
I have no idea.
-你可以的 -好计划
-You got this. -Cool plan.
你可以的 你现在美极了
You've got it. You look gorgeous.
-我感觉到了 -我不知道我行不行
-I'm feeling you. -Don't know if I can do it.
-你可以的 只是喝一杯而已 -苏西
-You can, it's just a drink. -Suzy.
别这样 你放心进去 好吗？
Come on. No, no, no. You go in there, okay?
要是他不行 你发短♥信♥给我 我会打给你
He's a dud, you text me, I'll call you,
我们就说家里有急事 没问题的
we'll just say there's a family emergency. No problem.
-手♥机♥别关机 全程开着 -我发誓不关机
-Keep your phone on. The whole time. -Swear to God.
一整晚 拉钩说好了
All night. Pinky swear.
我能行 好的 我去了