去年圣诞

我回头再来买♥♥
I'll come back for it.
好的
Yes.
好的
Yes.
好的
Yes.
就像看了一部北欧短片
That was like watching a short Scandinavian film.
你没事吧
Are you all right?
是的 我很好
Yes, I'm fine.
等一下 你是喜欢他吗
Wait. Hang on. Did you... like him?
你太神秘了 我看不出来
You're so mysterious, I can't tell.
当然不是
Of course not.
天呐 你确实喜欢他
Oh, my God, you did like him.
我对他一点都不了解
I don't know anything about him.
而你完全就在幻想 精灵
And you're fantasizing, elf,
因为你似乎成天满脑子想的都是性
because all you seem to think about these days is sex.
-天呐 他回来了 -哪呢
- Oh, my God, he's coming back. - Where?!
你看 我就知道你喜欢他
Got you. I knew you liked him.
现在我知道了
Well, now I know.
你喜欢男的个子高高 腼腆白净
You like your men tall, shy and translucent,
就好比一只长了骨头的章鱼而又没有那么多腿
like a squid but with bones and less legs.
闭上嘴 锁好门 晚安
Shut up, lock up, and good night.
晚上六点试演
糟了 我的天啊
Arse, head and hole!
滚开 克劳斯
Piss off, Klaus!
对不起 试演要迟到了
Sorry! Late for an audition.
抱歉
Sorry!
蠢货
Bugger.
不 不 不
No, no, no, no, no, no!
等一下 等一下 请等等
Please wait, please wait, please wait!
公开试演
他非常不错
He was... he was very good.
我不觉得
Not for me.
-帅气 -刺耳
- Charming. - Jarring.
我会把他归到"备选较好"那类
I would put him in "maybe plus."
"备选较好"
"Maybe plus."
对不起
Sorry.
-太抱歉了 我迟到了 -不好意思
- So sorry. I'm late. - Sorry.
-试演已经结束了 -对 我知道
- The auditions are closed now. - Right, yes.
名单上有我 我叫凯特·安德里希
I was on the list. No, my name's Kate Andrich.
是的 来的时候遇上了可怕的事故
Yeah, there was just a terrible accident on the way here.
涉及到圣诞老人吗
Was, uh, Santa involved?
是的 其实有她 对
Well, yeah. She was, actually, yeah.
"她" 你是"上帝是女人"那种女权吗
"She"? Oh, is this like a "God being a woman now" thing?
不 不 这些都是我的工作服
Oh, no, no, no. These are just my work clothes.
-别介意 -你在哪工作
- Don't worry about it. - Where do you work?
对健康与安♥全♥部♥门的讽刺
精灵与安♥全♥部♥门吗
Elf and safety?
不算是
Not exactly.
-不好意思 -抱歉
- Uh, I'm so sorry. - Sorry.
-你得下次再来了 -今天太晚了
- You're gonna have to come back next time. - It's too late.
这样吧 让她试一下吧
Well, you know what? Let her go.
影歌♥双栖女明星
谁知道呢 她没准就是下一个斯特赖桑德
I... Who knows? She might be the next Streisand.
谁也说不准
We don't know.
而且 我从来没见过精灵参加试演的
Plus, I've never seen an elf audition before.
好吧 开始吧
Um, yeah. Take it away,
你个怪异的北极人
you weird little North Pole-ian.
我叫凯特 我在哪播我的音乐
It's Kate. Uh, wh-where can I plug in my music?
音响师回家了
The sound engineer's gone home.
-这下可好 -清唱吧
- Great. - A cappella.
算是迟到的惩罚
The penalty for lateness.
行 我没问题 好吧
Yeah, I can do that. Okay.
可以
Sure.
好吧
Okay.
♪ 玫瑰花上的雨滴 小猫咪的胡须 ♪
♪ Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens ♪
♪ 亮闪闪的铜水壶 暖呼呼的毛手套 ♪
♪ Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens ♪
♪ 系着绳结的牛皮纸包裹 ♪
♪ Brown paper packages tied up with string ♪
♪ 这些都是我最爱的东西 ♪
♪ These are a few of my favorite things ♪
停 停
Stop! Stop.
♪ 当被狗狗咬... ♪
♪ When the dog bites... ♪
这个角色是你的了
You've got the part.
不好意思 搞错了
Sorry. No, no, no, it was, uh...
唱得像一坨屎
it was shit.
老天
Oh, for God's sake.
-又是你 -你说"又"是什么意思
- You again? - What do you mean, "again"?
你是跟着我来这的吗
Did you follow me here?
不是 我来这送货
No, I made a delivery here.
-是吗 -精灵都这么疑神疑鬼吗
- Yeah? - Are elves always so cynical?
是的 特别无情 现在是黑暗时期
Yes, relentlessly. These are dark times.
既然我没有跟踪你
So, having not followed you here...
我也送完了货
and having made my delivery,
你又偏巧撞上了我 那就这样吧
and you having bumped into me by chance, here we are.
"那就这样"
"Here we are"?
比如 我们可以一起溜达溜达
Well, for instance, we could go for a walk together.
你为什么一直想要和我溜达
Why do you keep trying to take me for a walk?
-我又不是狗 -你带着项圈呢
- I'm not a dog. - Well, you are wearing a collar.
真好笑 是这样的
Oh, LOL. You know what?
我没有心情溜达
I'm just not in the mood for a walk.
为什么
Why?
好吧 行吧
Well, fine. Okay.
我刚刚在本来能给我工作的人面前
I was just incredibly bad at what I do
表现得特别糟糕
in front of people who could've given me a job.
我以为你有工作
I thought you had a job.
是的 但不是我的专业
Yes, but it's not what I "do" do.
我又不是职业精灵
I'm not a career elf.
你是干什么的
What do you do?
唱歌♥的
Sing.
那很棒啊
That's pretty amazing.
我现在 似乎就是做不到...
I just can't seem to... at the moment.
总之 都是些无聊的事
Anyway, boring, boring, boring, la, la, la, la.
我不觉得无聊
I'm not bored.
说到底 你哪位
Actually, who are you?
我叫汤姆
I'm Tom.
我叫凯特
Kate.
你为什么这么友善
Why are you so flexible?
你为什么穿得像个精灵
Why are you dressed like an elf?
你知道原因 你知道吗
You know why. And you know what?
我这一晚已经受够了拙劣的精灵玩笑了
I have had my fill of utterly hilarious elf jokes for one night.
帮我遮一下
Cover me.
-在这儿 -是
- Here? - Here.
现在你是我的柜门
You are now my cupboard door.
-你经常干这种事吗 -不得已的时候
- So, you do this often? - Only when I have to.
好吧
Okay...
滚开
Oh, piss off.
掩护得可真好
Nice covering.
我已经尽力了
I'm-I'm trying my best here.
谢了
Thanks.
好了
Okay.
好了 不 等等
Okay. Oh, no. Hang on.
-我们去哪里 -这边走 来吧
- Where are we going? - This way. Come on.
你瞧
Look at that.
你以前没走过这条巷子吧
You never seen this alleyway before?
-没有 -这是伦敦最窄的巷子
- Nope. - This is the narrowest alley in London.
我朋友亨度管这条巷子叫"挤胖子"
My mate Hendo, he calls it "Fat Man's Squeeze."
-很有意思 不是吗 -你说是就是吧
- It's pretty cool, though, isn't it? - Sure. Why not?
我喜欢隐秘的地方
I like hidden places.
有没有人跟你说过
Has anyone ever told you there's something
你身上有点连环杀手气质
slightly serial killer-y about you?
没有 细想一下
No. Come to think of it,
没人这么跟我说过
no one's ever said that to me before.
反正没有超过一次的
Never more than once, anyway.
你怎么老手舞足蹈的
Why are you always dancing about?
朝上看
Look up.