肥皂人生（2015）

There must be something you've always wanted to do.
这可能是你最后的机会了
This could be your last chance.
裸奔真好玩!
Streaking is fun!
摄影师如果没有个秘密地方藏食物怎么会得到一个像胖埃迪这样的绰号♥?
How does a cameraman get a nickname like Fat Eddi if he doesn't have a secret stash of food laying around?
安娜 我觉得好像有个发电机...
Ana, I think there's a generator located...
后面可有一百个人在挨饿呢
I got 100 people starving back there.
八个 你的数学真烂
Eight, your math is off.
没有空调 这里只会变得更热
Without AC, it's only gonna get hotter.
请原谅我在一场自然灾害中变得有些夸张
Well, excuse me for being dramatic during a natural disaster.
安娜 我觉得我们真的应该...
Ana, I think we really need to...
天哪 盖尔 你还在讲话?
Oh, my God, Gael, are you still talking?
你变得真聒噪
You're getting real yippy.
好了 我觉得我们都有些燥热和饥饿...
Okay, okay, I think we're all a little hot and hungry...
嘿 我是能够拯救我们度过暴风雨的人
Look, I'm the one who knows how to get us through this storm.
我去过培训课
I went to the training sessions,
而且我是这里唯一知道安全锥放在哪里的人
and I'm the only one who knows where they keep all the cones.
盖尔 你成为安全队长的唯一原因是没有其他人想去当
Gael, the only reason you're Safety Captain is because no one else wanted to be.
不管怎么说 我还带着徽章呢
Well, I'm still the one with the badge.
是他的衬衫质量太差 还是我的力气太太太大了?
Is his shirt weak, or is my arm very, very strong?
我应该对盖尔道歉
I need to apologize to Gael,
但在我吃到东西之前 我是不会和任何人类说话了
but until I eat, I'm not speaking to another human being.
我已经完全口不择言
My filter's totally gone.
是吗?
Oh, yeah?
你究竟是怎么看待我孩子们的?
What do you really think about my kids?
- 不要让我回答那个 - 你怎么想的?
- Don't make me answer that. - What do you think?
- 不要让我回答那个 - 你怎么想的?
- Don't make me answer that. - What do you think?
我不确定是不是喜欢中间那个
I'm not sure I like the middle one.
他是慢热型的
Hmm. He grows on you.
也许我真是应该听盖尔的
Oh, maybe I should have listened to Gael.
他有一些好点子
I mean, he had some good ideas.
也许我们针对不应该浪费时间去找食物了
Maybe we shouldn't be wasting time looking for food.
也许我并不是一无所知
Maybe I don't know everything.
我找到食物了!
I found food!
我真的无所不知!
I do know everything!
你真的找到食物了吗?
Did you really find food?
对 我找到了
Yes, I did.
我看到我的人都在挨饿 痛苦 还想要放弃
I saw my people starving and suffering and giving up,
然后我说 “在我的带领下 不会的”
and I said, "Not on my watch."
这些苹果不太对劲
There's something wrong with this apple.
橘子也是
This orange isn't that great either.
这是道具食物
This is prop food.
他说的对 这些都是假的
He's right. This is all fake.
这个盒子上写着 "粗小麦"
This box says "Wheat Thicks."
不 这些都是真的食物
No, this is real food.
看看这葡萄
Look at these grapes.
- 葡萄味道如何? - 不错
- How's that grape? - It's good, yeah.
好吧 这是道具食物
Fine, it's prop food.
又不是说其他人做了什么有意义的事
It's not like anybody else did anything.
谁把灯弄亮了?
Well, who turned on the lights?
是我
I did.
当安娜带你们做无用功时
While Ana led you on a wild goose chase,
我弄明白了怎样重置保险丝
I figured out how to reset the fuse box.
我本也可以把灯弄亮的
I could have turned the lights on.
但你没有 我做到了
But you didn't. I did.
你所做的只是要求我们场地禁食
All you did was ban food from set,
结果现在每个人都在挨饿
and now everybody is starving.
后来你又企图骗我们吃假食物
And then you tried to trick us into eating fake food.
对 我们要怎么吃这些N&N(假m&m哈哈)呢?
Yeah, what are we supposed to do with these N&Ns?
安娜是个假先知!
Ana's a false prophet!
- 对 - 赞同
- Yeah. - Yeah.
我?
Me?
你们觉得你们现在这么惨都是因为我?
You think we're screwed 'cause of me?
这是你们每个人的错
This is your fault.
你知道为啥我要在片场禁食吗?
You know why I had to ban food on set?
因为你们所有人都没有自控力
Because you guys have no self control.
而且哈维 如果你能学会该哭就哭的话
And Xavi, if you learned how to cry on cue,
我们就可以在飓风来之前离开这里了!
we would have gotten out before the hurricane!
所有的事情都需要太长时间
And everything takes so long
因为罗德里格大舌音发的太长了!
because Rodrigo over-rolls his Rs!
怎么可能? 那简直太可可可可笑了
What? That's r-r-r-ridiculous.
而且因为罗克茜我们开场就已经迟了!
And we got a late start because of Roxie!
- 我之前在葬礼上好吗 - 好吧
- I was at a funeral. - Well,
我已经在这个音量上说话了所以我现在停不下来了!
I'm already speaking at this volume so I can't stop now!
安娜 你已经抓狂了好吗
Hey, Ana, you're acting crazy.
- 还有你 - 什么?
- And you. - What?
你的车闻起来像是一群小兔崽子足球队在里面吐过一样
Your car smells like a pee wee soccer team threw up in there.
我打扫了三次好吗
I cleaned it three times.
你说已经不发臭了呀
You said it didn't smell anymore.
然而 它还是很臭
Well, it does.
安娜 我们已经受够了你的虐待了
Ana, we are tired of taking your abuse.
是时候让你离开了
It's time for you to leave.
所有赞成驱逐安娜的 说赞成
All those in favor of banishing Ana, say aye.
- 赞成 - 不能更赞同
－ Aye. - Ay-yi-yi.
赞同
Aye.
任何人反对吗?
All those opposed?
反对! 好吧 猜怎样
Nay! Well, guess what.
现在外面有一场飓风而且我们全部都困在这里
There's a hurricane outside and we're stuck here.
我还能去哪里?
Where am I supposed to go?
救命!
Help!
你会没事的好嘛
You will be fine.
所有的这些都是红的了
All of this is red now,
我知道你们看不出来因为我的裙子也是红色的
and I know you can't tell because my dress is red,
但是相信我 请相信我啊 这是相当的糟糕啊
but trust me,créeme, it's bad.
她简直太美了
She's so beautiful.
好吧
Yeah.
听着 如果你真的想人生无憾的话
Look, if you really want to have no regrets,
你应该约她出去
you should ask her out.
我做不到 你自己都说了 她八成会拒绝我
I can't. You said so yourself, she'll probably just say no.
好吧 但是也有那么一丢丢的可能性她答应你啊
Well, there's a chance she'll say yes.
她现在可能已经饿的头晕眼花了
She might be lightheaded from the hunger.
我知道我就很饿 而且我完全就是在风中飘散着
I know I'm so hungry, I'm literally wasting away.
你是对的
You're right.
大部分的佛罗里达州都已经被风暴吞食
Most of Florida be swallowed by the storm.
再说一次 红的是不好的 绿色部分是超赞的
Again, the red part is bad, and the green part is good.
- 不 - 你这样简直让人忍♥忍♥忍♥忍♥忍♥无可忍♥!
- Nope. - You're being outr-r-r-rageous!
享受你的流放不?
Enjoying your banishment?
我简直不敢相信你刚刚没有支持我
I can't believe you didn't have my back.
嘿 我有超级生你的气好嘛
Hey, I am very angry at you,
但是现在我有点神志恍惚了
but now I'm feeling a little lightheaded
因为空调到现在还是没有办法运作 有点热
because the air conditioner's still not working, it's hot,
还有点饿 所以提醒一下我到底是为啥?
and I'm hungry, so remind me why?
我说了些不好的话 但是是你们逼我的
I said some stuff, but you guys made me.
好吧 盖尔现在管事了 所以 就这样咯
Well, Gael's in charge now, so, yeah,
- 没有你我们照样过得很好 - 哦 真的哦?
- we're doing great without you. - Oh, really?
哈维和罗德里格已经身处一场互扇大赛了好嘛
Xavi and Rodrigo are already mid-slap fight.
打他 给我狠狠的打 哈维
Hit him. Hit him, Xavi.
再一次再一次
Hit him again.
还来?
Again?
这简直太尼玛热了
It's so hot.
我找不到任何食物
I didn't find any food,
但是为啥你有那么多塑形裤?
but why do you have so many ACE bandages?
把我东西放下 专注好嘛专注
Put those down and focus.
我觉得为了你的眼泪 我们需要挖掘你的灵魂深处
I think we need to dig a little deeper to get you to tears.
你最惨痛的儿时回忆是什么?
What's your most traumatic childhood memory?
哦 这太简单了
Oh, that's easy.
那是在我11岁那年的圣诞节
It was the Christmas when I was 11.
那年的圣诞树下 没有礼物
There were no presents under the tree that year.
对 这就对了
Yes, great stuff.
不 没有礼物 而是一个游泳池
No, instead of presents, we got a pool.
那简直是人生中最赞的圣诞节
It was the best Christmas ever.
咋了? 确实是啊