百味超市（2015）

Superstore S05E16

Part 4 Oct. 18, 2020, 3:08 p.m.

while driving?
也要一观呢?
"Getting Garrett good." With a GIF of Nancy Pelosi
"给加略特彻底整疯了" 加上一个南希·佩洛西
clapping from the Speaker's chair.
在议长席上鼓掌的动图
Mmm. Totally worth dying for that.
看这消息真是死都不亏
Dina, I am sorry, but you were texting me so much
迪娜我很抱歉可你发给我的消息实在太多了
that I couldn't even do my work!
我都没法工作了!
You could've just said, "Dina, you're texting too much!"
那你可以直说 "迪娜你消息发太多了!"
Well, I didn't want to hurt your feelings.
我不想伤害你的感情
And the moment anyone tries to criticize you, you just explode.
而且但凡有人想批评你一下你就炸了
Well, at least people know where they stand with me, okay?
至少他们不做表面文章好吧?
I don't pretend to be somebody's friend
我不会假装自己是谁的朋友
and then secretly shut them out.
然后私底下不理他们
It's called honesty. Oh, is it honest, Dina,
这叫诚实这是诚实吗迪娜
or is it just you treating
还是你
people like garbage and calling it a virtue?
总视他人为粪土还自以为了不起呢?
Oh, you're so pathetic.
你真是太可悲了
You're so worried about having everyone's approval.
你总是想让所有人都认同你
I don't care if people like me.
我就不在乎别人是否喜欢我
Well, good, because nobody does.
好的很也确实没人喜欢你
I'm sorry.
抱歉
I didn't mean that. I...
我不是故意的我...
Can we... Watch out, watch out!
我们能不能... 看路快看路!
Oh, my God!
天哪!
What did I just hit? We hit a goose.
我刚撞到了什么? 一只鹅
Oh, thank God.
谢天谢地
We hit a goose.
我们撞了一只鹅
Hey, man.
嘿伙计
Wow, wound a little tightly there, buddy.
哇哦神经有点紧张啊兄弟
Everything all right? Mmhmm, mmhmm, yeah.
都还好吗? 还好
No, you know what? Uh, everything's not all right.
不去他的很不好
I think they're spying on our phones.
我觉得他们在监视我们的手♥机♥
What? I thought you said I was the paranoid one.
啥? 你不还说我有被害妄想症嘛
I thought you were, but then they started
我之前是这么想的但接着他们就开始
following me around; they started searching my stuff.
如影随形地盯着我他们还搜了我的东西
That woman in the café
还有那个在咖啡厅假装
who's pretending to read the newspaper?
读报纸的女人?
Nobody reads newspapers anymore.
现在谁还读报纸啊
I do. No, you don't.
我读啊不你才不读
You say you do, but you don't. Guys.
你说你读实际上你不读伙计们
Something crazy is happening.
有大事了
There are men in black suits swarming the parking lot,
有一堆穿黑衣服的人聚集在停车场那里
saying things like, "Quantico, this is Daniels"
还说什么 "匡提科这里是丹尼尔斯"
and "Uncle Phil is on the move, I repeat",
还有什么 "菲尔姨父行动中重复一遍"
"Uncle Phil is on the move."
"菲尔姨父行动中"
Wow, that is too crazy.
那还真是挺严重的
The only question is, who is Uncle Phil?
就是有个问题谁是菲尔姨父?
Probably someone that looks like Uncle Phil.
也许是某个长得像菲尔姨父的人
It's me! I look like Uncle Phil!
那就是我! 我长得就像菲尔姨父!
Man, why'd you do that stupid Google search?!
伙计你干嘛要在我谷歌♥上搜那种蠢东西?!
Whoa, calm down. No, I'm not gonna calm down.
冷静点去你的我没法冷静
You calm down. You're always starting stuff!
你倒是冷静明明搞事的总是你!
"Hey, Garrett, let's Google how to murder somebody."
"嗨加略特我们谷歌♥下怎么杀人吧"
Well, you happy now? What's next?
好了现在开心了吧? 接下来是什么?
"Hey, Garrett, let's tell Zephra to email the police
"嗨加略特让我们叫赛福来去写封邮件给警♥察♥
and tell them I just planted a bomb in the store!"
跟他们说我刚在商店里放了颗炸♥弹♥吧!"
Emailing local police.
正在发邮件给当地警方
"I just planted a bomb in the store."
"我刚在商店里放了颗炸♥弹♥"
Would you like to send?
是否确认发送?
N... Yes.
不... 确认
What? No!
啥? 不!
Okay, I've sent your email.
好的邮件已发送
Why?
你干啥?
I just always say yes.
我没法对人说不
It's mating season.
现在是求偶季
Her gander must be worried sick.
她的公鹅肯定要担心死了
How do you know it's a she?
你怎么知道它是母的?
The undercarriage. The neck.
从下盘还有脖子
The feather loss on the back of her head
还有她后脑上在交♥配♥时被她伴侣
where her mate pinned her down during penetration.
钉秃的羽毛
Okay.
行吧
Dina, I am sorry that I said nobody likes you.
迪娜很抱歉我之前说没人喜欢你
That's just not true.
那不是真的
I... It's okay.
我... 没关系
I overreacted to the whole muting thing.
我对被免提醒这事确实反应过激了
I just had a really hard year.
我只是这年都过得不怎么顺
My birds flew away.
我的鸟都飞走了
My dad turned out to be a big nothing.
我老爹还是个大混♥蛋♥
I can't even remember the last time I had a boyfriend.
我都记不起上回交男朋友是什么时候了
Even Sandra got married. Who saw that coming?
连桑德拉都结婚了啊这谁想得到啊?
Yeah, but she married Jerry, so...
是但她嫁的是杰瑞所以...
Yeah, I recognize that.
是啊我懂你意思
How does it work with geese?
有只鹅会不会不一样?
Do you think I can just have this?
你觉得我可不可以养这只鹅?
Um, I... I don't know.
我... 我也不清楚诶
I... I would ask.
是我的话... 我会先问问
Do you understand how badly this could have gone?
你明不明白这事有多严重?
People could have been shot.
可能会有无辜的人中枪
Again, we are so, so sorry.
真的我们非常非常抱歉
Yeah, I guess this is what happens
是啊我想这就是当某个不知道怎么
when someone who doesn't know how to do a prank
搞恶作剧的人去尝试捉弄别人
tries to do a prank.
的下场吧
Not a prank. It was comeuppance.
这不是恶作剧这是报复
It was an attempted comeuppance.
没有成功的报复
People go to jail for this kind of thing.
真的有人因为这种事坐牢的
Jonah was the ringleader.
乔纳才是主谋
Seriously? I was intimidated.
不是吧你? 我是被逼的
I'm a very weak person.
完全是被逼无奈
I'm gonna let you off with a warning this time.
这次我就只给你们一个口头警告
But in the future,
但以后
you should never joke about bombs.
再不要拿炸♥弹♥开玩笑
Right, sorry. Yeah, no, I...
好的抱歉那什么不是我...
I thought that was just airplanes.
我以为只有飞机上才有
It's everywhere. It's everywhere, Jonah.
现在到处都有到处都有啊乔纳
So then, okay, we got to the restaurant...
然后呢对我们去了饭店...
Three minutes left.
只剩三分钟了
Sweetie, I need to know if this is going somewhere.
宝贝我想知道这事最后到底有没有结果
It is! Okay, so then we get into our booth
有啊! 说到哪来着就然后我们走进包间
and you won't believe who we saw.
你们不会相信我们看见谁了
We will believe it. Just hurry up and say it.
我们会信的赶紧的别卖♥♥关子了
Okay, just give me a second! We don't have a second.
好啦就给我点时间嘛! 我们没时间了啊
Two minutes, 30 seconds!
就剩两分三十秒了!
Just jump to the end!
直接跳到结果!
Fine! We get back to the party,
好啦! 我们回到派对上时
Tish had my necklace,
蒂什戴着我的项链
and K-Fai is making out with Greg!
而凯菲正在和格雷格亲热!
Who the hell is Greg?!
格雷格又他妈是谁啊?
You would know if you didn't make me
如果不是你让我直接跳到结尾
skip to the end of the story!
你就会知道了啊!
Oh, my God.
我天哪
Her heartbeat is stable, so that's good.
她的心跳很稳定情况还不错
She drank some water in the car,
她在车里喝了点水
which gives me hope for her stomach.
让我觉得起码胃还是好的
She might have a broken leg, so...
她可能有条腿断了所以...
I'd like to get an X-ray while she's still sedated.
正好现在打了镇定我想给她照个X光
An X-ray for a goose?
给一只鹅照X光?
How much is that gonna cost?
那要花多少钱?
It'll probably be about $250.
大概要二百五吧
$250?!
二百五十块?!
That's like ten giant buckets of KFC.
那都够吃十桶巨型肯德基全家桶了
Sorry, that sounded really callous.
抱歉这话太残忍♥了