百味超市（2015）

Superstore S05E15

Part 2 Oct. 18, 2020, 3:08 p.m.

if they even hear the words "Mental distress,"
哪怕只是听到有人"精神忧郁"
they just give you paid leave, no questions asked.
他们就会给带薪休假而且不做调查
Seriously. Yeah.
还有这事儿那可不
Also, she said that the manager at Hilldale has a micropenis.
顺便她还说希尔代尔分店的经理下面是个金针菇
So it's been a pretty busy morning.
一大早就不少信息量呢
Please have a seat.
请坐下吧
I'll get right to processing your return.
我现在开始处理你的退货要求
All I need from you
而你所需提供给我的
is a confession.
就是一份认罪口供
I know you've been scamming the store for months.
我知道你已经讹这家店好几个月了
What do you got?
这都是什么呀?
Oh. Well, this is a handsome guy.
噢瞧啊这家伙真帅
But I have no idea what you're talking about.
但我完全不知道你在说什么
Then you won't mind if I open this.
那你应该也不介意我打开这个了
It's your space.
你的地盘
You do you.
你做主
Whoa.
哇哦
Rocks.
全是石头
It's a good thing I'm returning that.
幸好我要把它退了
You guys should file a complaint with the company.
你们应该给制♥造♥商寄投诉信
Okay.
得了吧
Listen... Benny.
给我听着... 本尼
Listen, Benny, it's obvious
听着本尼显然
you've been doing this for a while.
你已经是个老手了
You've got even weight distribution with the rocks,
你甚至考虑到了石头
noise dampening padding, industrial shrink wrap.
里面的防噪垫和外面的工业压缩塑封包装的重量配比
You're impressed.
给你留下了很深刻的印象吧
Hardly.
怎么可能
Well, it's a shame I'm innocent,
嘛真可惜我是清白的
because I would love to impress a woman like you.
若能给你这样的女人留下深刻印象该有多好
You're just flirting with me to get out of trouble.
你甜言蜜语不过是为了逃出泥沼
No, I'm flirting with you to get into trouble.
恰恰相反我是自甘沉沦
Oh.
哇哦
I feel like I'm in a full sweat.
好像突然热起来了啊
I ate some ghost peppers earlier.
一定是刚才吃的魔鬼辣椒的锅
Just on toast.
抹在吐司上吃的
Like to cleanse the system,
看来有必要去自我清理一番
so I should probably just put my butt over a bowl, and...
也许我只是该去好好上个厕所然后...
Hey.
嘿
So the cereal bar is running low.
谷物吧的罐子要空了
Someone should really be refilling that.
得找个人去重新填满
Yeah. I kind of thought that that someone would be you.
是我想让你去填的来着
Right, or maybe, like, Justine or Sayid.
或者... 比如让贾斯汀或萨义德去
Anyway, Zephra also asked me to set up a video conference
不管那个了赛福来让我今天下午在休息室
in the break room this afternoon.
举办一个视频会议
A video conference? Why?
视频会议? 为啥?
The CEO is doing a bunch of surprise FaceTimes to Cloud 9s.
总裁想要给超♥市♥的员工们一个会面惊喜
Just a five-minute meet-and-greet.
就是用五分钟问候下大家什么的
Oh. Okay.
噢好的
Like, cool. That's exciting.
我是说棒啊真令人激动
Do you think maybe they sent us the cereal bar today
你觉不觉得他们今天给我们送来谷物吧
just so we'd be in a good mood for the call?
就是为了让我们好好接受这个召会?
Come on. No!
怎么会呢没有的事儿!
Why is everybody being so cynical about this?
为什么大家都对此持怀疑态度?
Not everything is always half empty.
又不是什么都会空一半[有不好的一面]
Except the cereal bar is.
除了谷物吧
We should really get on that.
我们真应该把它填满了
That's right. Let me know what you decide.
说得没错决定让谁去的时候告诉我
No, I decided. It's you.
不是我已经决定好了就是你去
You have to admit, it is pretty convenient timing.
你得承认这个机会正好
Can you just help me figure out how to play this?
你就不能单纯帮我解决这事儿先吗?
Kira Moon isn't some stodgy Cloud 9 CEO.
琪拉·蒙可不是什么蠢蛋超♥市♥CEO
She's young and edgy and fun,
她很年轻很有个性还幽默风趣
and I think she's progressive.
而且我觉得她很开明
Look at her profile pic. It's just a purple square.
看看她主页的照片就是个紫色的正方形
That's gotta mean something.
这其中肯定大有深意
You know, maybe this could actually be an opportunity.
你要知道也许这实际上是一个机会
No. No, Jonah.
不不行乔纳
No. I know what you're thinking.
不可以我知道你在想什么
Oh, come on, I'm just saying,
噢拜托我的意思是
how often do employees get to talk to the CEO?
普通员工一辈子能有几回和CEO谈话的机会?
You know, we could bring up some of our issues.
你想想我们可以把我们遇到的问题直接反映给她
And have her first impression of us
然后让她对我们留下像薇露卡·索尔特那样
be Veruca Salt barking out orders?
大吼大叫提要求的第一印象?
"But Daddy, I want health insurance now!"
"但是爸爸我现在就想要健康保险!"
That is pretty adorable. I don't know how they'd say no.
那还挺可爱的我都不知道他们怎么忍♥心拒绝
Look, we're not giving up on the issues.
听着我们不会放弃解决问题
It's just... it's just a friendly welcome call.
可它只是... 只是一个表示友好的欢迎召会
It's not the right time.
时机不对
Okay. All right, fine. Yeah, I get it.
行吧好的好行了我知道了
We will wait for the right time.
我们会静待良机
Okay, great. So we're all just gonna smile
没错就是这样我们只要全员微笑
and make a good first impression.
留下个良好的最初印象就行
Amy, I need to report an employee theft.
艾米我要上报一件员工盗窃案
Hey, it's our cereal.
喂反正那是大家的麦片
Who cares if I eat it here or at home?
在这吃还是在家吃又有什么区别?
You can't fill up a backpack! Fine, take some.
你不能装满一包! 行那这些给你
I don't need your used cereal.
我才不要你吃过的麦片
Maybe we should just walk everyone through it.
也许我们应该带他们彩排一遍
You know, not that they're children...
虽然他们也不是小孩子了...
No, they're children.
不他们就是小孩
Hey, favor to ask. What can you do to ugly me up?
帮我个忙你能想法子把我变丑吗?
Like, pockmarks, unibrow, fewer eyes, more?
比如满脸痘疤没有眉毛眯眯眼之类的?
Well, why do you wanna look bad?
呃你为啥想变丑?
I have a scammer in custody and I need him to confess,
我逮着了一个诈骗犯想让他交供
but he's into me, and it's just gonna make everything go wrong.
但是他喜欢我这样我就没法好好干活
I mean, my personality's a homerun,
虽然我的性格是真的很完美
so that's not exactly helping.
可在这件事上没什么帮助
Well, if he's already seen you, it might be kind of weird
好吧可是如果他已经看到过你了
to go back in there with more face parts.
你再往脸上加东西可能会很奇怪
That's a really good point. Yeah.
有道理当然
We have to do something.
咱们得做点儿什么才行
It's starting to get very steamy in there.
我开始觉得有些潮湿了
Oh, my God. You like him!
天呐你喜欢他!
No, no, no.
不没有我不
Is he hot? Yes!
他帅吗? 是的!
He's exceptionally hot.
他超级帅的
But no, I don't like criminals, okay?
可是我不喜欢他我怎么可能喜欢罪犯呢?
But try telling that to my heart and my Hot Pocket.
可是我的心脏和热裤不这么觉得
Later today,
今天晚些时候
Kira Moon from Zephra will be "Surprising" Us
赛福来的琪拉·蒙会通过视频聊天
with a video chat.
给我们一个"惊喜"
We get to talk to the CEO?
我们可以和CEO通话?
We should clarify which Hemsworth she's dating.
我们得问清楚她的男朋友是哪个海姆斯沃斯
I heard it's not the one you think it is.
我听说不是你们认为的那个
We should ask if the cereal was meant to be taken home.
我们应该问问那些麦片能不能带回家
I'm just curious.
我只是好奇罢了
No, we should ask her for stuff we need,
不我们应该问问我们需要的东西
like self-driving cars, right, Jonah?
比如无人驾驶汽车乔纳对吧?
That was all her...
那都是她的...
it's just a friendly call, Sandra, not an opportunity.
桑德拉这只是一个寒暄通话别当成什么机会
Exactly. But you know, Kira might ask you all some questions,
正是但是琪拉可能会问你们一些问题
so I thought it would be good for us to practice, you know?
所以我觉得咱们练习一下会比较好怎么样?
Like, Glenn, pretend I'm Kira.
比如说格伦假装我是琪拉
But she's just a normal person.
但她只是个普通人
Just think of it like you're talking to me.
就当成你在和我说话
"Me" As in you, or "Me" As in her?
"我"是指你还是她?
"Me" As in me, Amy.
"我"是指我艾米
But you just said that I should pretend that you're her.
但你刚刚说我应该假装你是她
Right, and I'm saying talk to her like she's me.
没错但是我说的是像和我说话一样和她说话