腌黄瓜先生

只要大家看到你人这么好
But once people see how nice you are,
就会忘记你看上去有多恶心
they'll forget how disgusting you look.
别动那个
Hey, get away from there.
我拿上我的东西 我们就走
Well, let me just get my things, and we'll go...
不好意思
Excuse me.
*某天散步经过公园时*
*While strolling through the park one day...*
往上 穿过来
Up, up, and away!
请欣赏我们打死蒙上眼的鹿
Watch in amazement as we shoot a deer blindfolded.
大家鼓掌
A round of applause, everybody!
-外公 -腌黄瓜先生
- Hi, Grandpa. - Hey, Mr. Pickles,
你最好不要献祭
you better not try to sacrifice...
-爸爸 -好吧
- Dad? - Okay.
祝你好运 儿子 你会需要好运的
Good luck, son. You're gonna need it.
好的 下一位 汉克将表演飞刀杂耍
All right, up next, Hank is gonna juggle knifes.
大家给汉克鼓掌
Give it up for Hank.
我以后还是别来看才艺表演了
I gotta stop going to talent shows.
好的 下一位 有请一位我不认识的人
All right, up next, give it up for person I don't know!
祝你好运
Good luck.
*女巫的魔法棒变出了一匹种马*
*From the witch's staff sprung a mighty stallion*
*它力量堪比一千只龙*
*With the strength of a thousand dragons*
*这只马的名字叫格雷戈里*
*The horse was named Gregory*
*没有凡人能将它驯服*
*And no mortal man could tame him*
*从孤独之海的深处*
*From the depths of the Sea of Solitude*
*走来一位女子*
*Stepped a woman worthy*
*她喝了男巫的魔法药水*
*She slipped a potion from a magical wizard*
*就能驯服那匹种马*
*That could help but tame that stallion*
*巫师大笑着 哈哈哈*
*The wizard said, Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha*
*哈哈哈哈哈*
*Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha*
*那位女子喝下了魔法药水*
*And that woman, she drank the magical potion*
*然后就变成了独角兽*
*And transformed into a unicorn*
*独角兽和种马来相配*
*The unicorn and the stallion mated*
*配上恶龙和巫师*
*With the dragon and the wizard*
*他们大笑着 哈哈哈*
*And they said, Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha*
*哈哈哈哈哈*
*Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha*
谢谢
Thank you.
-怪胎 -变♥态♥
- Freak! - Freak!
-怪物 -怪物
- Monster! - Monster!
烂透了 烂透了
You suck! You suck!
你们应该感到羞耻
Hey! You should be ashamed of yourselves?
我要讲几个笑话
I was gonna do some jokes,
但是你们根本不配笑
but you don't deserve to laugh.
获胜者诞生了
We have a winner!
*举起双手 举起双手*
*Put your hands up, put your hands up*
*嬉皮士们 举起你们的双手*
*Hippity, put, put, put your hands up*
*我说才艺 你们说表演*
*When I say "Talent", You say "Show"*
真抱歉 大家对你这么刻薄
I'm sorry everyone was so mean to you,
但我觉得你很棒
but I thought you were great.
你真的以为我需要个平庸的瘸子
You think I need a talentless cripple
告诉我我很棒吗
to tell me I was great?
把奖杯给我
Give me that trophy,
不然我就把你的脸皮割下来缝你屁♥股♥上
or I'll cut your face off and put it on your butt!
我的奖杯
My trophy!
晚饭好了 我做了双层吉士千层面
Dinner's ready! I made a two-cheese lasagna.
老天 我饱了
Oh, boy, am I stuffed.
汤米 去睡觉
Tommy, go to bed.
考虑下我们之前说的特别惊喜怎么样
How about that special surprise we talked about?
这可不是双层吉士千层面
It's not a two-cheese lasagna,
这是三层吉士千层面
it's a three-cheese lasagna!
惊喜吧
Surprise!
我一个笑话都没有说成
Oh, I didn't get to tell any of my jokes.
那现在跟我们说一个
Tell us one now.
你的老婆和你的工作有什么不同
What's the difference between your wife and your job?
过了五年 你的工作还是很烂
In five years, your job will still suck.
suck可表示烂或者咬
还是很烂
Still suck!
我没听懂
I don't get it.
我知道你没听懂
I know you don't.
外公和腌黄瓜先生去哪里了
Hey, where's Grandpa and Mr. Pickles?
你拿着那个干什么
Hey, what are you doing with that?
电锯可不是给狗用的
Chain saws are not for dogs.
腌黄瓜先生
Hey, Mr. Pickles,
你最好停下
you better stop...
那是汤米的奖杯
Hey, that's Tommy's trophy.
把那个给我
Give that to me.
不要 我才配得上它
No, I deserve it.
我才是最有才华的人
I'm the most talented person in to...
什么
What?! Hey!
腌黄瓜先生
Mr. Pickles!
怎么回事
What the hell?!
才艺表演