吉尔莫·德尔·托罗的奇思妙想（2022）

我还是把它放回原处吧
I think I'm just gonna put him right back here in his… his house,
赶紧盖起来
and cover him up.
- 天啊 真恶心
- Oh my God, that's disgusting. -Mm.
还是放远一点较好
Just… get him out of the way a little.
- 放远一点 - 吉娜 做得好
- Stick him a bit out of the way. - That's a good idea, G.
- 好奇怪 - 太奇怪了
-Unusual. - Wow, that's very unusual.
女同事们 喜欢我送的护肤霜吗？
How about that glow, ladies?
还用说吗？
- I mean, come on!
这款护肤霜很贵的 而且经常缺货！
It's so expensive, and they rarely have it in stock.
-你在哪里买♥♥的？ -恕我无可奉告
- Where did you get it? - I'm not telling! I am…
有些科学的味道
It's kinda scientific.
揉得越深…
The deeper you rub it…
天啊
Oh, wow, okay.
你感觉到了吗？
Do you feel that?
好舒服
Amazing.
天啊
Oh my gosh. Yeah.
好舒服
So soothing!
感觉到了吗？
You feel that?
感觉到了 好温暖
Yeah, I feel it. It's really warm.
糟糕
Oh shit.
史黛西 你的脸
S… Stacey, your… your face.
怎么了？
-What? -
很暖和
- It's… It's… It's warm.
-不是 你的脸发红 -天啊
Yeah, no, it's red. -Your skin is red. -Oh my God.
- 什么？- 你的脸发红
-What? - Your skin is red.
-发红？ -好红 好难看
-It's red? - It's really red. It's gross.
- 是啊 - 很糟糕吗？
- Yeah. -It's bad?
- 很糟糕 - 很不妙
-Yeah. -It's not good.
- 挺糟糕的 - 很不妙
-It's bad. It's angry. -It's pretty bad.
天啊
Oh my God.
- 难道… - 好像出红疹了
- Is it… -Like a rash.
谢谢你的冰袋
Thanks for the ice pack.
我会带去银行还给你
I'll bring it to the bank.
不用
Oh, no.
没必要 你收着吧
No, no, no. You keep it.
抱歉 是我扫兴了
Sorry I ruined everything.
没有这回事
Really, you didn't.
不要紧的
It… It's fine.
外面很冷 赶紧回家吧
Look, it's so cold. Go home.
圣诞快乐
Merry Chris… tmas.
亲爱的 我看你是皮肤过敏
I think you're allergic, hon.
我怎么偏偏就对 天底下最顶级的护肤霜过敏呢
Of course I have to be allergic to the best lotion in the world.
要真是天底下最顶级的护肤霜
If it was the best lotion in the world,
就不会造成你皮肤过敏 不是吗？
it wouldn't do that to your face now, would it?
别人用了都没有过敏反应
It doesn't do this to anybody else's face.
你是个敏感的人
Well, you're sensitive.
你的皮肤也敏感 史黛西
You have sensitive skin, Stace.
记得你去年圣诞节 要的薰衣草香水吗？
You remember that lavender perfume you wanted for Christmas last year?
喷了你整个颈项都出红斑
The one that made your neck all splotchy.
就只有我有毛病
It's just me.
我的脸不好看
I have a bad face.
一张愚蠢 丑陋 难看的脸
A stupid, ugly, bad face.
喂
'Ey.
别再说这种话了
Enough o' that.
早安 小姑娘
- Morning, girl.
失礼了
Ah, look at me.
智保暖手炉 要…
The Zippo Hand Warmer. Be--
拥有完美外形不需要动刀
You don't have to go under the knife to achieve perfection.
只要用亮彩护肤霜
Just use Alo Glo.
丑小鸭也能变成耀眼的天鹅
Transform yourself from ugly duckling to stunning swan,
售价199.99美元起
starting at just 199.99.
亮彩护肤霜能解决所有烦恼
Alo Glo can fix it all.
马上拨♥打♥屏幕上的热♥线♥号♥码
Call the number on your screen now.
亮彩护肤霜是唯一能够 改善你身体 思想 灵魂的护肤产品
Alo Glo is the only skincare product that transforms your body, mind, and soul.
无论是想要打造陶瓷肌
Whether you want porcelain skin,
还是想要提高回头率 或是想要融入群体中
you want to turn heads, you want to fit in,
抑或确保银行里的女同事不再取笑你
or just make sure those ladies at the bank never laugh at you again.
你也懂她们是怎么看你的
You know how they look at you.
更贴切的说法是
Or should I say,
她们连看都不看你一眼
how they don't look at you.
一起解决烦恼吧
Let's fix it.
这到底怎么回事？
What the heck is happening?
史黛西 别自欺欺人了
Come on, Stacey.
这不是你梦寐以求的吗？
Isn't this what you've always wanted?
如果能融入群体 又何必格格不入？
Why be the odd duck out when you can join the flock?
赶紧拨♥打♥屏幕下面的号♥码吧
Call the number on your screen now.
立即拨♥打♥
- 副作用包括 - 这也太扯了
- Side effects may include… -This is crazy.
情绪不稳 关节僵硬 产生幻觉 害怕亲密关系
…change of mood, stiff joints, hallucinations, fear of intimacy,
心灵空虚 缺乏动力 缺少个性
internal emptiness, lack of ambition, lack of individualization,
缺乏独♥立♥思考能力和个人主张
lack of independent thought and opinion.
也可能会对先前享受的
-You may experience… - What is this?
爱好失去兴趣
…activities previously considered pleasurable.
但这一切都是值得的
But it's all worth it.
简直太蠢了
This is so stupid!
这到底怎么回事？
What is this?
有什么好笑的 史黛西？
What's so funny, Stacey?
我怎么可能在跟电视说话呢？
No, I… I'm not talking to the TV.
你不是在跟电视说话
You're not talking to a TV.
而是在跟我说话
You're talking to me.
我可以把你改造成全新的自己
I can give you the brand-new you,
不仅如此 我还能让你高枕无忧
and that's not all. I can give you peace of mind.
我可以让你融入群体中
I can get you a seat at the table.
亮彩护肤霜绝对能解决你的烦恼
Alo Glo can fix you, and that's a guarantee.
我看到你前面桌上 放着一支亮彩护肤霜
I see the Alo Glo right there on the table in front of you,
可是没见你拿来用
but I don't see you using it.
我用过了 没有效果 瞧我的脸 都红透了
I already used it, and it didn't work. I mean, look at me. I'm all red.
你要用完整支 以后还得用更多
Well, you have to use the whole bottle, and you're gonna need more.
你希望全身上下都焕然一新 不是吗？
You want a full body transformation, don't you?
没错 可是用了有刺痛感 我现在全身瘙痒
Yeah, but… it stings. It's making me all itchy.
产生刺痛感是正常的
Of course it stings.
就是因为有效 才会产生刺痛感
It hurts when it works.
皮肤愈合时都会发痒
Skin itches when it is healing.
感觉越痒 皮肤恢复得状态越好
The more it itches, the more healing it is doing.
史黛西 你有很多地方需要恢复
You have a lot of healing to do, Stacey.
赶紧拿起电♥话♥吧
Just pick up the phone.
好好考虑 史黛西
Think about it, Stacey.
当你这种人是一件很可惜的事
It's such a shame to have to be you,
因为你不是那种大家都想接近的人
because you're not someone anyone wants to have around.
不是那种大家都想见到的人
You're not someone anyone wants to see.
但你很快就会成为 自己梦寐以求的那种人了
But soon, you will be the things you always dreamed of.
无条件接纳 和睦相融 天下太平 真♥善♥美♥
True acceptance, harmony, peace, and divinity.
这些都是假的
All that stuff is a lie.
每个人都希望自己是好看的
We all just wanna be good-looking.
赶紧跨出框框吧
So now step across to the other side,
跳出舒适圈 加入亮彩护肤霜的行列
step out of your skin, and into your Alo Glo.
请输入你的信♥用♥卡♥号♥码
Enter your credit card number.
本产品含有视黄醇和胜肽
Harnessing the power of retinol and peptides
能够深入皮层起效
that work deep within the dermal layer,
- 使肌肤焕然一新… - 感谢你的订购
promoting… Thank you for your order.
我们期待见到全新的你
We look forward to meeting the brand-new you.
亮彩护肤霜会让你的身体打造新的你
…tells your body to make a new you.
记住 不用的话就没效果
Remember, it doesn't work if you don't use it.
寻常人的扑克牌实用妙招
史黛西？
Stace?
有人敲门吗？
Did I hear a knock?
今天不用上班吗？
Hey, aren't you supposed to be at work?
我请病假了
I called in sick.
天啊 瞧你的脸
Whoa, your face!
没那么糟糕吧
It's not that bad.
有的
Yeah.