方格斯的奇幻旅程（2015）

怪物
Your monster.
怪物这个词有点过
Look, I did not use the word monster.
它是独自游走吗
Was it travelling alone?
显然不是
Evidently not.
有几只
How many?
两只
Two?
男性还是女性
Male or female?
每样一只
One of each?
一对夫妇
A married couple?
你是个牧师
You are a priest!
是不是看起来像一对夫妇
Did they strike you as a married couple?
是的
Yes.
终于有所进展了 神父
Now we're getting somewhere, Father.
那座教堂里能容得下多少人
So, how many people can you fit in that hall, then?
只需要容得下那一个就好
Only needs to fit one.
你们好啊 怎么了
You all right, girls? What's up?
这周末是她的生日
It's her birthday this weekend.
她要办个派对
She's got a party and
在教堂里办迪斯科 还有DJ之类的
it's like a disco in the church hall with a DJ and everything.
迪斯科 在教堂里
A disco? In a church hall?
听起来不容错过呢
Unmissable.
当然啦
Yeah. It will be.
还有主题
It's got a theme.
怪物
Monster.
达文特里怪物派对 - 什么
A Daventry monster party. - What?
很酷
Cool.
到时候见咯
I'll see you there.
也许吧
Maybe.
我的天呐 天呐 天呐 天呐
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
气味进了这里
It goes in here.
霉杜 去按门铃
Mildew. Ring the doorbell.
要是有人听见了怎么办
What if someone hears me?
就是要让人听见啊 亲爱的
That's the point, my drear.
分散他们注意力
It's a diversion.
有什么事吗
Can I help you?
你敲门我才开的 亲 你有什么事吗
I answered the door to you, love. What can I do for you?
没有 不用了 我很好 谢谢你
Oh, no, no, no, nothing. I'm fine, thank you.
我负责转移你的注意力
I'm a diversion.
是吗
Oh, are you, now?
好 这样吧 你在这等着
Okay, I'll tell you what we'll do. You wait there
我去看看你转移我注意力是为了什么
and I'll go and see whatever it is that you're diverting me from.
霉德
Mould!
我们终于找到你了
We found you.
他们找到我了 - 霉德 是我
They found me. - Mould! It's me.
妈妈 - 宝贝 我担心坏了
Mum? - Darling, I've been so worried!
那是我爸吗
Is that my dad?
天呐 他真丑
Bog, he's hideous.
方格菌 变回来
Fungus, change back.
等一下
Hang on a minute.
你确定要这么做吗
Are you sure you want to do that?
应该让她变身回人类
She should be folding back to human.
这小子应该回屋里去
That lad should get off the street.
她说的没错
She's got a point.
快进来 你们全进来
Get inside, all of you.
跟我装无辜没用 小姑娘
No use giving me cleanly looks, young lady.
这是你自找的
You brought this on yourself.
什么
What?
呃 法官 不幸的情报
Uh, Your Horror, unfortunate intelligence.
我的怪怪 你是躲在蜗牛壳里吗
Dear bog, that's you in a snailshell.
什么事 快说出来 伙计
What is it? Puke it up, man.
有一家人全家叛逃了 是 嗯
A whole family has defected, ma'am. It's, er...
方格菌
Fungus.
污水家的方格菌
Fungus of the House of Bilge?
把法槌给我
Give me my gavel.
全家 革除污魔籍 - 噢
The whole family, excombogeycated. - Ow!
流放到不归沼泽
Exile to The Swamp of No Return.
你们看什么看 跟上
What you looking at? Carry on.
难以置信
I can't believe it.
哦 郁闷
Oh, drear.
你非常博学 夫人
You're very knowledgeable, madam.
茶 试试看
Tea. Try it.
不管你多会变身
Doesn't matter how good your fold is,
如果你不能喝下一杯茶
if you can't drink a cup of tea,
人们会在一英里外就识破你
people will spot you a mile off.
哦 谢谢你照看我们的儿子
Oh. Thank you for looking after our son.
我的荣幸 他是个很棒的男孩
It was my pleasure. He's a wonderful boy.
霉德 给我们介绍一下
Mould, would you introduce us to
这位满脸痘的臭老太婆
this pox-ridden stinking hag?
哦 我的意思是 嗯 - 不 我明白
Oh, I meant, erm... - No, I know.
我叫Eve - 她是我的朋友
My name's Eve. - She's my friend.
我要和她住在这里
I'm staying here with her.
哦 如果你想的话 小可爱
Oh. If that's what you want, pet.
我恐怕 夫人 我们该走了
I'm afraid, madam, we must be on our way.
我要留下和Eve在一起
I'm staying with Eve.
霉德 听你♥爸♥爸的话
Mould. Listen to your father.
我说 - 我听到了 霉德宝贝
I said... - I heard you, Mouldy.
我们走吧
Let's be off.
如果他想的话 可以留下
He can stay if he wants.
你为什么不怕我们 夫人
Why do you not fear us, madam?
我们是污魔怪啊
We are Bogeys.
为什么我该害怕
Why should I?
你是一个干净人
You're a Drycleaner.
他也是 只要你让他干净
And so's he. If you'd only let him.
霉德 霉杜
Mould, uh, Mildew, uh...
恐怕我们在这个干燥的房♥子不再受欢迎了
I fear we are no longer welcome in this dessicated house.
但是 - 你别再说了
But... - Don't you say another word.
Daryl 你刚和小金刚狼打完架吗
Daryl, have you been fighting with a very small wolverine?
我为这些伤疤感到骄傲
I wear these scars with pride.
律师现在都开始
Solicitors have taken to
与小蛋糕叉战斗了 是吗
fighting with tiny little cake forks, have they?
不 我是在做园艺
No, I've been gardening.
为什么 - 因为我是一个园丁
Why? - Because I'm a gardener.
人类大战灌木丛 受死吧
Man versus shrubbery. Get it on.
烂爆了啦
That is so lame.
你有法律学位 不能当园丁
You've got a law degree, you can't be a gardener.
其实可以 Wendy 但反过来不行
Well, actually I can, Wendy. But not the other way round.
成为合格的园丁 无法让我成为律师
Being a qualified gardener wouldn't entitle me to be a lawyer.
但是我不仅仅是园丁
But I'm not just a gardener.
我是奇怪工作男 兼杂工 兼园丁
I'm an odd job man-cum-handyman, slash gardener,
括号♥主要是园丁
brackets mainly gardener.
这是我的人生 好吗
It's my life. Okay?
我不想当律师 再也不想
I do not want to be a solicitor, ever again.
你的人生
Your life.
句号♥ 谈话结束
Full stop, end of conversation.
可以给我200镑吗
So can I have 200 quid?
什么 - 其实 500更好啦
What? - Actually, 500 would be better.
这样哦 那我们能知道你要做什么吗
Oh, would it, actually? And may we know what you'd like that for?
办达文特里怪物派对
My Daventry monster party.
服装 化妆 装饰 食物
Costume, make-up, decorations, food,
闪光的各种的气球和一个好DJ
shiny balloons in shapes and a proper DJ.
是 这可能是要花费500镑
Yeah. That'll probably cost 500 quid.
行啊 - 什么
Ah. Okay. - What?
你修剪该死的灌木 来赚这500镑吗
And you're gonna earn 500 quid by pruning some bloody bush, are you?
哦 我会不停修剪
Oh, I shall prune unceasingly.
我会边修剪边在心里哼唱欢快的小曲儿
I shall prune with a joyful song in my heart.
没错 - 耶
Yes. - Yay!
耶
Yay!
跟你说个事 亲爱的
I'll tell you something, drear,
你该庆幸你不是一个女污魔怪
you should be glad you're not a bogeywoman.
干净人的胸罩 只有两个杯
These Drycleaner bras. They've only got two cups.