方格斯的奇幻旅程（2015）

如果你连尝试新事物都不肯 我们怎么生存
How are we going to survive, if you won't even try it?
哦 真是的
Oh, for pissy's sake.
我并不害怕尝试新东西 霉德
I'm not afraid of new experiences, Mould.
现在你对你♥爸♥和我礼貌点
Now you show your father and me some good manners.
噢 糟了
Oh, muck.
这实在太大压力了
It was very stressful.
你觉得我的工作就没有压力了
And you think my job isn't stressful?
亲爱的 光是和你同处一屋
Darling, we get great waves of passive stress
我们就已经感到一波波可怕压力了
just being in the same room as you.
哦 是嘛 那你怎么不去追着Dinky Bharaj
Oh, yeah? Well, why don't you scoot down to Dinky Bharaj,
管她是谁 然后给她修水龙头
whoever she is, and correct her tap?
因为我第一次做得很好了
Because I did it properly the first time.
它不需要再修一遍
It doesn't need doing again.
抱歉 伙计们 还有一堆
Sorry, folks, one more load.
到底发生什么了
What the hell is going on?
霉杜 集中精力
Mildew. Concentrate.
我刚扔下你们一分钟
I leave you alone for one minute.
我试着集中啊
I'm trying!
还有这些你带进家的
And who exactly are these bloody care-in-the-community people
他妈的智障人士又是谁
that you've brought into my house?
男的看起来像个恋童癖
He looks like a bicycle-seat sniffer,
而那女的显然在接受药物治疗
and she's clearly on medication.
他们不可能负担起健身房♥会员费
They can't afford a gym membership.
你又不知道
You don't know that.
我能嗅出人身上缺钱的味道
I can smell a lack of money on people
而且我从咱们身上就能闻出来
and I can smell it on us.
吃饼干吗 Bunny
Biscuit, Bunny?
哦 我的天
Oh, God!
你还好吗
Are you all right?
我太太很好 谢谢你
My wife is quite well, thank you.
她只是放了个屁
She just farted.
很大一个
Quite a big one.
哦 好吧
Oh, good.
这位是Eve
This is Eve?
厨房♥真不错 Wendy
Lovely kitchen, Wendy.
臀腰减肥 亲爱的
Bum and Tums, drear,
继续说吧 我感兴趣着呢
do go on. I'm fascinated.
我和你讲 要是他们不继续这个派对
I tell you, if they don't follow through on this party
我非得自杀不可
I am so totally going to kill myself.
我可以和Dean一起吗
Can I have Dean?
不 我和Dean在一起
No. I get Dean,
哪怕是我死了
even if I'm dead.
值得拥有的男人可不是树上长出来的
Guys worth having don't grow on trees.
至少在这镇上不是
Not in this town.
你好 我是Runny
Hello. I'm Runny.
你在对我们的窗帘做什么
What are you doing to our curtains?
在轻抚它们
Stroking them.
你说你的名字叫Runny
Did you say your name was Runny?
嗯嗯
Mmm
我很乐意去看看你的皮具中心 Wendy
I'd love to see your Leather Centre, please, Wendy.
噢 是休闲中心
Oh, leisure.
恩 很好 太棒了
Well, that's great. Marvellous.
明天早上怎么样
What about tomorrow morning?
介绍课程 说九点如何
Introductory session. Say 9:00?
九点
9:00.
Lucy 这是Green一家 他们刚刚搬到隔壁
Lucy, these are the Greens. They just moved in next door.
太棒了
Cool.
衬衫真好看
Nice T-shirt.
噢 小镇上都有卖♥♥
Oh, they're selling them around town.
我在办一个达文特里怪兽的派对
I'm having a Daventry monster party...
瞧
See.
为我生日办的
For my birthday.
不好意思
Sorry.
茶的原因
It was the tea.
你讲得极对 它太恶心了
As you rightly said, it was disgusting.
我们可以走了吗
Can we go now?
我们拿到钥匙了 现在就搬入新居吧
We have keys. Let's move you in.
听着 人类是一个安全的群体 除非我们自己感到恐惧
Listen, humans are an okay crew till we get scared.
如果你再在别人面前现出污魔怪的模样
If you go Bogey form again in front of someone,
恩 如果你们幸运的话 你们最终都会被关在动物园
well, if you're lucky, you'll all end up in a zoo.
什么 - 没事的 亲爱的
What? - It'll be all right, love.
特别是你 你很特别
Definitely for you. You're special.
我们不能再这样下去了
We cannot go on like this.
今天这样不小心露馅
One slip of the fold,
干净人迟早会逮着我们
and the Drys will be onto us like that.
我必须和Eve谈一下
I must converse with Eve.
菌多利亚
Bactoria!
安静点
Be silent.
你这个冲动的蠢货
You impetuous fool.
你是想让你那不靠谱的老婆
Do you want your flibbety-jibbled little wife
知道你曾经爱上过一个可怕的女人吗
to know you once loved a Bogey woman with a bit of spunk?
这个偶然出现的手
The occasional hand.
就是她残留的全部了 方格菌
That's all that's left of her, Fungus...
那个你曾经誓死追随的女孩
The girl you once swore to follow.
等等 我从来没有爱过你
Hang on, I never loved you.
你说你要到地面上来
You said you wanted to go topside,
我说我想跟着你来
I said I'd come with you.
没错 不过你却恐惧了
Yeah, and you were too stinking scared.
我确实
I was.
难道你不怕吗
And aren't you?
他们迟早会发现你是谁
That they'll find out who you are?
"伊芙"
"Eve?"
你在威胁要告发我
Are you threatening to expose me?
我不认为这是个好主意 你觉得呢
I don't think that's a very good idea, do you?
如果你动脑想想的话 方格菌
If you think about it, Fungus,
你办事真的不能没有我 你能吗
you can't really do without me, can you?
想象一下 在这上面 没有我的保护
Imagine being up here without my protection.
你们会被碾成渣的 你们三个都是
You'd be crushed. All three of you.
就像这样
Like that.
你甚至还不会这样打响指
Which you can't even do.
霉杜
Mildew...
她还不知道
She doesn't know.
关于你和我之间的事
About you and me.
她一定不能知道
She must never know.
你不是十分擅长谈判 对吧
You're not very good at negotiation, are you?
方格菌先生 胆小的污魔怪
Mr Fungus, the scaredy-cat Bogeyman.
亲爱的
Direling!
我刚刚把这浴缸床弄得脏兮兮
I'm just bogeying up this tin bed
所以你可以在臭气中睡个好觉
so you can have a nice farty sleep.
秘密 方格菌
Secrets, Fungus.
你不泄我的密 我也就不会泄你的密
You keep mine. And I'll keep yours.
但我们要十分清楚 我可是有脑子的
But let's be very clear. I wear the brains.
你要是背叛我 我只需要替我自己打圆场
You betray me, and I will simply talk my way out of it.
不过接着我会重重地打击你
But then I will hit you so hard,
我亲爱的
my direling,
这会让你整个家庭遭殃的
it will kill your whole family.
你想从我这里得到什么 菌多利亚
What do you want from me, Bactoria?
嗯
Hmm...
一些乐趣
Some fun.
你必须要满足我 方格菌
You must indulge me, Fungus.
我很长一段时间都特别 特别生你的气
I have been very, very angry with you for a very long time.
现在我打算惩罚你
And now I'm going to have to punish you.
直到我感觉好些
Until I feel better.
这样才公平
It's only fair.
你真该看看这个 亲爱的
You should see this, drearest.
它上面有一层十分不错的外皮
It's got a really nice skin on it.
你有趣的娇妻在呼叫你了 我的小恶心桶
Your amusing little wife is calling you, my pukepot.
快跑过去吧
Trot along.
噢
Oh!
这他妈又是什么
What in the name of God?