克拉克森的农场（2021）

♪ In the white room ♪
♪ With black curtains ♪
♪ Near the station ♪
♪ Black roof country ♪
♪ No gold pavements ♪
♪ Tired starlings ♪
♪ Silver horses ran down moonbeams ♪
克拉克森的农场
♪ In your dark eyes ♪
第三季
欢迎回到克拉克森的农场
Welcome back to Clarkson's Farm.
现在是2022年8月中旬
It's the middle of August in 2022.
不客气 谢谢 你是哪里人?
You're welcome. Thanks. Where have you come from?
一切似乎都很熟悉
And everything seems to be familiar...
干了
It's dry.
洋溢着田园风光...
And bucolic...
而且精彩绝伦
and wonderful.
但恐怕幕后的情况 一点都不美妙 因为...
But I'm afraid that
behind the scenes, it isn't wonderful at all, because...
所有可能出问题的地方都出了问题
everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.
克拉克森的农场
第17集 非耕地
我们从天气开始说起
Let's start with the weather.
在经历了87年来最干旱的夏季之后
After the driest summer for 87 years,
地面干裂 像混凝土一样坚硬
the ground is parched and as hard as concrete.
因此 庄稼遭受重创
And as a result, the crops are taking a battering.
所以我们试着在干旱的土地里种土豆
So trying to grow potatoes where there's no moisture...
是成熟期的土豆 它不会再长了
Look, the skin's set. So it's not gonna grow anymore.
“成熟期”是什么意思?
What do you mean?
新长出来的土豆 如果你这么摸土豆的皮 会把皮擦掉
You know, new potatoes, if you did that you'd rub the skin off.
- 就像泽西皇家土豆一样?是啊 - 是的
- Like a Jersey Royal? - Like a Jersey Royal.
但现在 它的皮牢牢地粘附着 以阻止其水分流失
But these have now set their skin to stop them losing moisture.
所以它就只能长这么大了?
- So that's as big as it's gonna get? - Yeah.
是的
该死!
Shit.
卡莱布试着采收 这些鹅卵石大小的土豆
Kaleb had a go at harvesting these potato pebbles,
但非常失败
but it was hopeless.
不行 土豆全都掉了 你看
No, I'm just dropping them all, look.
土豆太小了 会从滚轮之间掉下去
The potatoes are that small, they're falling between the rollers.
它们就掉到了地面上
It's just dropping them on the top.
在旁边的田地里 向日葵也出了问题
In the next field along, the sunflowers were suffering too.
已经到八月底了
Look. It's coming to the end of August.
这些向日葵必须成熟 这样我们才能及时采摘
These flowers have gotta mature, ripen, in time for us to harvest them.
这葵花籽已经熟了吗?
- Well, is this seed ready? - No.
- 没 完全没用 - 我们没法采摘这些向日葵?
- That's useless. - We won't be able to harvest these?
白种了 不行
It's pointless. No.
真糟心
For fuck's sake.
接下来 蓝蓟 一种植物性鱼油
Next, there was the echium,
a sort of plant-based fish oil
有人跟我说 如果它长得好 我就能大赚一笔
which I'd been told would net me a fortune if it grew well.
就这?
Is that it?
不多啊 对吧?
Not a lot, is there?
那是...那...
That's just the... That's...
一块斯佩耳特小麦田的产量是那么多
One field of spelt wheat produced that much.
一块蓝蓟田的产量就这么点
One field of echium has produced... that.
妈的
Bloody hell.
土壤干燥还意味着
The dryness of the soil also meant
明年收获的油菜籽也没法种了
that planting next year's oilseed rape was a non-starter.
但你看!天啊 那是...
Look. Oh God, that's...
前几天我挖到地下30公分的地方 什么都没有
I went down a foot the other day. There's nothing.
所以如果我们把油菜条播进去 它没法生长
So if we try and drill rape into that, it's not gonna grow.
除了这些问题 还有在夏季初开业的
On top of all this, there was the pretty little restaurant,
售卖♥♥我们在农场里种植的作物
which we'd opened earlier in the summer
和驯养的动物的漂亮小餐厅
to sell the food we'd grown and reared on the farm.
- 干杯 各位 - 干杯 各位
- Cheers, guys. - Cheers.
但仅仅在六周后
But after just six weeks...
关门通知
议会给我们送来了 一份强制执行通知书
The council served us with an enforcement notice,
让我们必须关闭餐厅
telling us it had to close.
欢迎各位 你们好吗?
Welcome, everybody. How are you?
这种硬质小麦让我特别自豪 因为这种作物通常生长在意大利
I'm particularly proud of the durum wheat,
'cause it normally grows in Italy.
- 大家看起来都很饱了 - 还要牛胸肉吗?
Everyone looks very full. - More brisket?
谢谢大家过来
Thank you for coming.
强制执行通知
Enforcement notice.
“在此通知生效之日起的六周内
"What you are required to do within six weeks of the date
“你需要做到以下事项
on which this notice comes into effect."
“停止在该土地的任何地方 向公众出♥售♥或提供食物或饮品
"Cease use of any part of the land for sale or provision
of food or drinks to members of the public
“或让公众在该土地上消费
or for consumption on the land.
“停止将该土地的任何地方
Cease use of any part of the land as a restaurant or a café."
“用作餐厅或咖啡厅” 即使我们有权这么做
Even though we're allowed to.
“停止将该土地的任何地方 用作停车场”
"Cease use of any part of the land for parking."
什么?
What?
“将餐厅周围的土地恢复到
"Reinstate the land round the restaurant to a condition
similar to that of the agricultural land immediately surrounding it,
“与其周围的农业用地相似的状态
“清除所有地基碎石和其他表面材料
removing all hardcore and other surfacing materials,
“包括砂砾和碎石”
including gravel and stone chippings."
为什么农场不能有砂砾啊? 我不理解
Why you can't have gravel on a farm, I don't know. But anyway.
但无论如何 “移除所有其他景观材料
"Removing all other landscaping materials, including wooden sleepers,
“包括木枕、木板边条和木屑...”
wooden plank edging and wood chippings." -
木屑会腐烂的
- The wood chip's just gonna rot. - I know...
他们彻底疯了
They've gone completely mad.
“移除所有植物和植物容器”
"Removing all plants and planting containers."
- 农场不能放植物盆 - 太荒唐了
You can't have plant pots on a farm? - Ridiculous.
我们一直在原地打转 浪费了一大笔钱
We're going round and round in circles, wasting a lot of fucking good money...
浪费的是你的钱
- Your money. Permanently. - Yes, and the tax payers'.
还有他们的钱 以及纳税人的钱...
每个人都投了钱进来
Well, everybody's money is just being--
然后被白白浪费 这就是个笑话
Pissing it up against the wall.
It's a joke. All the effort we put in and we're back on square one.
我们的一切努力都是徒劳的
餐厅关门后 我们再也没钱养这些奶牛了
With the restaurant shut down,
we could no longer afford to keep all the cows.
我们可以留着小牛 把它们养肥
We could hang onto the calves to fatten them up
但它们的妈妈必须离开
but their mums... would have to go.
我们之前买♥♥了19头 生了8头牛犊 所以总共是27头
We bought 19. They had 8, so that's 27.
杀了两头 还剩25头
Killed 2, 25.
- 没错 - 我们留...
- Correct. - We're keeping...
12头
Twelve.
所以要送走13头
So 13 are going...
我这里有13张凭证
Thirteen passports I have here.
把它们赶上车
Dropping off.
我觉得今天真的很难过
I'm finding today really quite sad.
因为去年 我早上打开窗
It's 'cause for the last year, I've been opening the windows,
拉开窗帘就能看到奶牛 我很喜欢那种场景
opening the curtains in the morning, and there are the cows. And I love that.
它们哞哞叫
Making cow noises.
每天早上看到它们都让我很开心
It just cheers my heart every morning to see them.
小牛今晚会不会伤心?
Are the calves going to be a bit upset tonight?
会 你今晚别想睡觉了
- You're not gonna sleep tonight. - No.
- 它们会不睡吗? - 不
They won't? - No.
是你会睡不着 它们会叫一整晚
No, you won't sleep. They'll be calling all night long.
我能问一下吗?显然胡椒也得离开
- Can I ask? Peppa's going, obviously. - Yeah.
- 是的 - 你觉得它会怎样呢?
What do you think will become of her?
如果我是你 我不会问胡椒的去向
I wouldn't ask too many questions about Pepper.
不要问你不想知道答案的问题
Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to.
Oh, Christ.
天啊
我们只留下了 一些感人的手♥机♥视频回忆
All we had left of the departed
was some touching phone-camera memories.
丽莎手♥机♥视频
Oh, look!
不可以!
No! No! No! No!
出来!你们俩!快离开那儿!
Out of there. No, you too. Out.
Out! No, not my flowers!
不行 别踩我的花!出去!
Get out!
继续走 嘘!嘘!
Go on, shoo. Shoo.
你也是 嘘!
You too, shoo. Shoo.
杰里米!
Jeremy?
- 要喝杯茶吗? - 好啊
- Cup of tea? - Yeah.
好的
Okay.
- 我们又不是一头没留 - 就是 我们留了不少
It's not like we're not keeping a few.
- No, we've got quite a few. - Yeah.
是的
把我们接生的都留下了
It could be all the ones we gave birth to.