母亲外出之夜

那才叫妈妈
Now that's a mom.
简直是完美的化身 对 我敢说她有请保姆
Talk about perfect. Oh, yeah, I bet she has a nanny.
好 大家要乖乖的 今天是母亲节
Okay, everybody, best behavior. It's Mother's Day.
妈妈 我帮你刷
Mommy, let me do it.
不行 女儿 今天我们大迟到了 好吗
No, baby. We're running really late today, okay?
让我刷
Let me!
妈 慢点
Mom, slow down.
佐伊 边走边说
Walk with me, Zoe. Just walk and talk.
但妈 你是地球上最急性子的人
But, Mom, you're, like, the fastest person on Earth.
这是桑德拉
This is Sondra.
牧师的老婆
桑德拉 牧师的老婆我的心灵捕手
My Catcher in the Rye. My crutch.
我的费尔医生 欧普拉和甘道夫的合体
My Dr. Phil, Oprah and Gandalf all rolled into one ball of goodness.
她美中不足的是 她不知道什么是自动校正
Her only perceived flaw is that she has no idea what auto-correct is.
妈 我不舒服
吃止痛药
不对 打错了...
No. No, no, that's not what I...
佐伊 什么
再吃一碗鸡汤
真难用
Technology!
妈 够了
妈 这...只是舞会 那里会有些镭射灯
Mom, it's really... It's just a dance and there's gonna be some laser lights
还有荧光棒 就这样
and some glow sticks and that's it.
瑞舞派对不是舞会 相信你妈
A rave is not a dance. Trust your mother.
但妈 很多教会的小孩...她们甚至...
But, Mom, a lot of the kids from church are... They're even...
-我不管 -真的吗
-I don't care! I don't care! -Seriously?
-你要替我想想 -佐伊
-Come on, have a heart. -Zoe!
妈 你每次都这样 你会让我交不到朋友
Mom, you always do this. You're gonna murder my social life.
也许这样最好
Well, maybe it deserves to die.
你知道你满17岁才能约会 所以我赢了
You know you're not allowed to date until you're 17, so we have a winner.
对 我输了
Yeah, and a loser.
我的前额印着"我是牧师的女儿"
I have "Preacher's Kid" stamped on my forehead.
你在这里
There you are.
-有找到笔记吗 -有
-Did you find my notes? -Yeah, right there.
很好 从哪里找到的 我到处都找遍了
Perfect. Where'd you find them? I looked everywhere.
-别戴那条 -有问题吗
-I'll just take that. -What's wrong with that one?
摄影师说你的领带太闪亮 这条会比较好
Video guy says your tie is strobing, so this one will be better.
笔记放在你的办公桌上 角落那叠
Okay. Notes were on your desk, corner pile.
-嘿 爸 -嘿
-Hey, Dad. -Hey.
你的第一场布道讲得很好 我想问你...
You were so awesome in the first service and I was just wondering what...
女儿 我知道你想说什么
Sweetheart, I know what you're doing,
但我们已经说好了
but we've already talked and we agree.
但尝试是好事
Points for trying, though.
我连申诉的机会都没有
I didn't even get a fair shot.
-爱你 -爱你
-Love you. -Love you.
早安 今天有人生日 对吗
Good morning. Somebody has a birthday, right?
很高兴见到你
Nice to see you.
过来
Come here.
-有收到我寄的食谱吗 -有 谢谢
-Hey, did you get that recipe I sent? -Yes. Thank you.
很好 很高兴见到你 谢谢抽空过来
Good. Good. Nice to see you. Thank you so much for coming.
爱莉 你早上很辛苦吗
Hey, Ally, hey. You having a rough morning?
桑德拉 告诉我 我的人生会恢复正常
Sondra, just tell me it's all gonna be okay.
一切会没事的 只要再等五年 你就会...
It's all gonna be okay. Just give it five years and you'll be...
-年 -七或五年...
-Years? -Seven or five...
要我帮忙看小孩吗
Do you want me to help you with the kids?
布兰登 小子 你在做什么
Brandon! Buddy, what are you doing?
-要帮忙吗 -不用 我都撑到现在了
-Do you need some help? -No, I've come this far.
-我会有始有终 -好
-I am going to finish this. -Okay.
我们走 走这边 转过来 走吧
Let's go. Let's go. This way. This way. Around. Around. Let's go.
早安 姐♥妹♥们♥ 大家好吗
Good morning, y'all! How is everyone?
-很好 -很好
-Great. -Great.
桑德拉 你是我的灵感
Sondra. You are such an inspiration to me.
还有你 你真有福气 有她当妈妈
And you. You are so blessed to have her as your mother.
我真有福气
I am just so blessed.
放开 快放开
Let go. Let go, let go, let go!
这是我的好姐妹 伊兹 我们形影不离
This is my best friend, Izzy. We pretty much do everything together.
我的好姐妹
小学时她是活泼的风云人物
In grade school she was wild and popular,
我是内向的牙套妹
and I was an introvert with braces.
这是马可 她的老公
And this is Marco, her husband.
马可 伊兹的老公
他极度害怕三种人
He's always had three irrational fears,
摔角手 机车帮和小孩
luchadores, biker gangs and small children.
这让他在万圣节 特别毫无招架之力
This makes him particularly vulnerable at Halloween.
不给糖就捣蛋
Trick or treat!
伊兹
Izzy!
-他们又和我说话了 -做得很好 老公
-They're talking to me again. -Doing fine, babe!
他们不应该和我说话
I'm just supposed to check them in.
-等等 -什么事
-Hey! -What?
别对我发火
Don't kill the messenger,
但主日学辅♥导♥员说
but the Sunday school coordinator said
这次要记下你的电♥话♥号♥码
to remember your number this time.
好 没关系 拜托
Yes. Yes. Okay, fine. Just please,
别为了小事叫我过来
please don't page me over something trivial.
消防局不认为是小事
The fire department didn't think it was trivial.
伊兹 看着我
Izzy, look at me.
我...今天是母亲节 我要有一小时自己的时间
I just... I need one hour to myself on Mother's Day.
拜托
Please.
我要看20个小孩
Like, like, me with 20 toddlers.
谢谢 你是好姐妹
Thank you. You're a servant.
把睫毛膏洗掉 连我看来都觉得很奇怪
And fix the eye. It's really weird, even for me.
面纸呢
Where is it?
拜托
Come on. Come on.
好了
All right.
好
Well, okay.
快出来
Work. Work!
你为什么不动 快动
Why won't you work? Come on!
诗篇127节说到 子女是神的赐福
Psalm 127 says that children are a blessing from the Lord.
对不起 我能...
Excuse me, can I get...
所以母亲的地位很重要
That's why the position of mother is a high calling
应该受到尊敬和保护
and one that should be honored and protected.
老实说 我知道你们在想什么
And let's be honest, I know what you're thinking.
"我应该高兴小孩把水果软糖
"Should I be happy when my child shoves
塞进DVD播放器吗"
a Fruit Roll-Up in the DVD player?"
你在做什么
What are you doing? What are you doing?
对不起 请把鞋拿给我
Sorry. Can I have my shoe?
谢谢
Thank you.
我知道对有些人来说 母亲节很辛苦
I know for some of you, Mother's Day can be hard.
如果你像我的老婆
If you're like my wife,
母亲节是检视努力的时候
Mother's Day is when you examine all your efforts
思考你牺牲这么多 到底值不值得
and wonder whether it's worth it when you have to sacrifice so much.
好
Okay.
你的小孩叛逆时 你到底有没有影响力
Or whether you're having an impact at all when that teen rebels,
或你到底是不是好妈妈
or whether you're really a good mother by some measure that
有没有达到你自己的标准
you've created in your own mind.
在今天布道开始前
So as we get started today,
-我想对在场的妈妈说...-爱莉森
-what I want to say to every mother here... -Allyson.
我知道你不想被通知
Look, I know you didn't want to be paged,
但贝克的头特别大
but Beck has an especially large head
那些马桶又特别小
and those are especially small potties.
但好消息是 我们有找到螺丝起子
But good news. We found a screwdriver.
我们把马桶盖拆下来
I mean, we got the seat off the toilet,
但不知道 要怎样从贝克的头上拿下来
but we don't know how to get it off Beck's head.
什么
What?
待会 音乐...
In a moment, our music...
音乐牧师会带我们唱圣歌♥
Our music minister's gonna come and lead us in song.
我们会继续礼拜
And we're gonna continue the worship.
-好 -继续吧
-Okay. -We're gonna continue.
天啊
Whoa.
老婆
Hey, hon?
爱莉
Ally?
老婆
Hey.
-你回来了 老公 -怎么回事
-You're home. Hi. -What happened?
只是休息一下
Just taking a little break.