肉丸（1979）

北星夏令营注意
Attention, Camp North Star,
高级职员 顾问和实习顾问们
senior staff, counselors, and counselors in training,
请起立 奏唱我们的国歌♥
please rise for our national anthem.
这国歌♥怎么样 嗯？哎呀 我不知道你们感觉如何
How about that anthem, huh? Gee, I don't know about you,
但我每次听到 我都如鲠在咽 激动不已
but I just get a great big lump in my throat every time I hear it.
嗯 现在是早上7点05分
Well, it's 7:05 in the a.m.,
而且 哇 根据北星夏令营的老式温度计
and it's, wow, 43 degrees
气温是43华氏度
on the old Camp North Star weather dial,
嗯 对于6月25号♥来说 这有点冷飕飕的 不是吗？
and, well, that is kind of nippy for a June 25, isn't it?
我是特里珀·哈里森...
I'm Tripper Harrison...
我是你们的首席顾问 这是我的起床秀
I'm your head counselor, and this is my wake-up show.
我每天早上大约这个时候都会来叫醒你们
I'll be coming at you every morning about this time,
希望能让你们的夏令营体验
hoping to make your summer camp experience
物超所值
the best available in this price range.
当然啦 在湖对面 莫霍克营地那边
'Course, across the lake, over at Camp Mohawk,
他们还得再过一小时左右才会起床
they won't be getting up for another hour or so,
等他们起床的时候 会有仆人端着羊角面包和牛奶咖啡
and when they do, they'll be awakened by servants
去叫醒他们
bearing croissants and cafe au lait.
希望这话没有打击到谁
Hope I didn't hit anybody.
但是在这里 今天早上的北星夏令营
But over here, at Camp North Star this morning,
我们也有美味的稀粥早餐
we're gonna be having a delicious gruel breakfast,
别忘了要求续碗 因为稀粥是无限♥量♥供应的
and don't forget to ask for seconds, because it's all the gruel you can eat.
好了 各位 请大家注意一下 好吗？
Okay, everybody. Can I have your attention, please?
好了 各位 我在你们安静下来呢
Okay, everybody, I'm waiting. People, settle down.
好了 这样好多了
Okay. That's better.
听着 今年这里有很多新来的朋友
Look it, there's a lot of new people out there this year,
所以在继续之前 我想先自我介绍一下
so before we go any further, I wanna introduce myself.
我叫莫蒂·梅尔尼克
My name's Morty Melnick.
你好啊 米奇
Hi, Mickey.
我叫莫蒂 不是米奇
My name's Morty, not Mickey.
明天早上6点30分会发车去接孩子们
Now, the buses are leaving tomorrow morning at 6:30
你们必须知道自己的巴士分配
to pick up the kids,
这点非常重要
and it's very important you get your bus assignments
这样才能知道你们负责哪一组孩子
to know which group of kids you're in charge of.
别跟我争 布拉德利
Don't argue with me, Bradley.
浣熊也会传染狂犬病的
Now, you can get rabies from a raccoon, too.
告诉他 莫里 - 没错 布拉德利
Tell him, Morrie. - That's right, Bradley.
还有别忘了在马桶座圈上垫纸
And don't forget to put paper on the toilet seat cover,
不然可能会感染严重的传染病...
'cause you could get a terrible infection...
哦 对了 我本想问你 你带烟了吗？
Oh, you know what I meant to ask you, did you bring smokes?
哦 没有 我没带 我忘了
Oh, no, I couldn't. I forgot.
我妈在我行李箱里发现了那条烟 她大发雷霆
My mom found the carton in my suitcase, she had a shit-fit.
那我们干嘛不去买♥♥点呢？ - 好啊 好吧
Well, why don't we go get some? - Yeah, okay.
妈妈？妈妈？我妈在哪儿？
Mommy? Mommy? Where's my mommy?
特里珀 我期待着今年夏天能有点乐子
Tripper, I'm looking forward to some action this summer,
希望你和你的男士们能满足我
I hope you and your gentlemen can supply it for me.
嗯 我倒是可以满足你
Well, I could supply you,
但你得小心提防斯帕兹
but the guy you gotta watch out for is Spaz.
斯帕兹？ - 他可是个做♥爱♥狂
Spaz? - He's a sex machine.
得了吧 就算他使出浑身解数 也无法动我分毫
Are you kidding me? He couldn't wake me up with a trumpet and a drum.
嗯 有天晚上我跟他一起出去
Well, I went out with him one night,
他一个人就给我们搞定了六个护士
and he got us six nurses by himself,
其中四个第二天早上都没法去上班
and four of them couldn't report to work the next morning.
你自己能行吧？
You gonna be okay?
嘿 暑假结束的时候再见 好吗？
Hey, I'll see you at the end of the summer, okay?
好的
Okay.
这辆巴士没有安全检验合格证
This bus does not have a safety inspection sticker.
这是辆不错的老巴士
It's a fine old bus.
不 才不是 它就是一堆废铁 我得告诉我爸爸
No, it's not. It is a piece of junk. I need to tell my father,
他会向机动车管理部门举报你的
and he's gonna report you to the Department of Motor Vehicles.
罗克珊！
Roxanne!
你会坐牢的 知道什么是监狱吗？就是关在铁窗后面那种
And you're going to jail. You know? Jail? Behind bars?
是啊 我们会像去年一样讨厌这个夏令营
Yeah, just like last year, we'll hate it.
是啊 营地烂透了 加上你还是个呆子
Yeah. Camp is lousy, and you're a dork.
是啊 是啊 你说得对 - 你确实是个呆子
Yeah, yeah, you're right. - You sure are one.
你好啊 - 真是的
Hiya. - Come on.
嗨 - 你想干嘛？
Hi. - What do you want?
怎么 遇到麻烦了吗？ - 我没法让这些孩子上车！
What, are you having trouble? - I can't get these kids on the bus!
好吧 让我跟他们说 - 那是因为我不想去
Okay. Let me talk to them. - That's because I'm not going.
过来 孩子们 我想跟你们说句话 好吗？
Come here, guys, I wanna have a word with you, all right?
不
No.
好了 你们听着 你们... - 什么？
Okay, now you guys, look, you... - What?
你们最好上车 否则... - 为什么？
You better get on the bus, or... - Why?
嗯 因为如果你们不上 我就把你们揍得屁滚尿流！
Well, because if you don't, I'm gonna beat the pants off of you!
怎样 我♥干♥得不赖吧
Not bad, huh?
嘿 小心点 那东西很贵的 - 没有问题 先生
Hey, watch it, that stuff's expensive. - Very good, sir.
嘿 斯帕兹 老兄 最近怎样 哥们？
Hey, Spaz, bud. How you doing, buddy?
嘿 斯帕兹 很高兴见到你
Hey, Spaz, good to see you.
嘿 还给我
Hey, give that back.
拜托 斯帕兹 我们是在帮你忙
Come on, Spaz. No, we're doing you a favor.
还给我！ - 你想动手吗 斯帕兹？
Give it back! - You wanna make us, Spaz?
是啊 - 霍斯 把奶昔还给他吧
Yeah. - Horse, give him back the milkshake.
好啦 好啦 还给你啦
All right, all right. Here you go.
嘿 篮球赛上见 斯帕兹
Hey, we'll see you at the basketball game, Spaz.
莫霍克营地的混♥蛋♥
Mohawk jerks.
这些孩子们要去的是所有夏令营中最富魅力的
These children are going to the most glamorous of all summer camps,
莫霍克营地
Camp Mohawk.
那里要排队等两年 每个孩子都必须经过投票才能进入
There's a two-year waiting list, and every child has to be voted in.
最重要的是 去莫霍克营地每周要花费1000美元
On top of all that, it costs $1,000 a week to go to Camp Mohawk.
问题是 它值每周1000美元吗？
The question is, is it worth $1,000 a week?
当然值 它是最好的营地
It sure is. It's the best darn camp there is.
嗯 你和莫霍克营地有关系吗？
Well, are you connected with Camp Mohawk?
嗯 我想是的 我是项目主管 杰里·阿尔迪尼
Well, I think so, I'm the program director, Jerry Aldini.
嗯 你如何证明每周1000美元是合理的呢？
Well, how do you justify $1,000 a week?
嗯 我们有一些特别的项目
Well, we have some special programs.
我们今年当然会再次推出莎士比亚戏剧的环形剧场表演
We're doing Shakespeare in the Round again this year, of course.
我们的政♥治♥圆桌会议 亨利·基辛格会出席
Our political round table. Henry Kissinger will appear.
亚西尔·阿♥拉♥法特也会来
Yasir Arafat is gonna come out,
和孩子们共度一个周末 给他们表演说唱
spend a weekend with the kids, just rap with them.
那太棒了
That's amazing.
孩子们想要动物
And the kids wanted animals,
所以今年 每位营员都将在我们的私人野生动物保护区里
so this year, each camper will stalk and kill his own bear
追踪并猎杀一头自己的熊
in our private wildlife preserve.
你确定孩子们能应付得了吗？
Are you sure the children can hack that?
我们拭目以待 但真正的兴奋点 当然
We'll see. But the real excitement, of course,
会在暑假结束时到来
is gonna come at the end of the summer,
就是我们的"性意识周"
during Sexual Awareness Week.
我们从世界各地进口200名妓♥女♥
We import 200 hookers from around the world,
每位营员 只配备一保温杯的咖啡和2000美元现金
and each camper, armed with only a Thermos of coffee and $2,000 cash,
然后尽可能地体验世界各地的"异域风情" 当然 获胜者
tries to visit as many countries as he can, and the winner, of course,
将获得"性意识周之王"的称号♥
is named King of Sexual Awareness Week,
并被允许在夏令营结束前 对邻近的城镇进行强♥奸♥和掠夺
and is allowed to rape and pillage the neighboring towns until camp ends.
太不可思议了
That's incredible.
一周一千美元 你还想怎样？
What do you expect for $1,000 a week?
嘿 也祝你夏季愉快
Hey, you have a good summer, too, huh?
嘿 你肯定是我们下单的那个忧郁的小个子了
Hey. You must be the short, depressed kid that we ordered.
很高兴你来了
Glad you made it.
要分一半吗？
Want half this?
进来吧 科学怪人 我请你喝一杯
Come on inside, Frankenstein, I'll buy you a cocktail.
好了 所有12岁的女孩都到齐了吗？
Okay, all the 12-year-old girls here finally?
今年会是非常棒的一年 今年这批孩子真不错
Gonna be a terrific year. Got a real good bunch this year.
这地面太滑了 我可能会摔倒 导致颈部过度屈伸受伤或者摔断脖子
This ground is too slippery. I could fall and get whiplash or a broken neck.
你知道 那些都是重伤 可能会死人的...
You know, those are serious injuries. A guy could die...
菲尔？他归你了 - 谢谢 特里珀 你是鲁迪·格纳吗？
Phil? He's all yours. - Thanks, Tripper. You Rudy Gerner?
嗨 我是菲尔 你住我小屋那 行吧？
Hi, I'm Phil. You're in my cabin, okay?
得拿这个... - 嗨 莫蒂
Gotta get this... - Hi, Morty.
嗨 特里普 你拿到规章了吗？ - 没 我正在找呢
Hi, Trip. You got the rules? - No, I'm looking for a copy.
好了 给你
Okay, here you go.
非常重要 你们所有的实习顾问
Very important, all your CITs
都必须把这些规章倒背如流 正背反背 随便你怎么背
have gotta know those inside out, backwards, forward, whatever you want.