怪异城市

好吧
Okay. Um...
我还在布置
I'm still just setting up
我们的训练2点才开始
and our session isn't until 2:00.
我就热身一下
Yeah, I'll just be getting warmed up.
到处转转 和人聊聊
And hanging around and chatting with people.
不要太...投入了
Okay, well, don't overexert... yourself.
纹身不错
Nice tattoo.
和你的一样 德尔塔
Just like yours, Delt.
我只是太敬仰你了
I just admire you so much.
好吧 谢谢你 谢谢你
K. Thanks. Thank you.
又一周后
潘德鲁 你有没有试过
Hey, Pandrew, have you tried
新出的鳟鱼和薰衣草升级版冰沙
the new Trout and Lavender 2.0 Super Smoothies?
我对这些真是太上瘾了
I'm practically addicted to those things.
不 我有我的饮食计划
No, got my own food plan.
是什么呢
What is it?
冰冻时代饮食 所有东西都是冰的
The Ice Age Diet. Everything's frozen.
听起来不错
Sounds good.
记得一定要把这些光束压下去
Remember to really push down on those beams of light.
这叫对抗训练
It's called resistance training.
我知道
I know.
推 推
Push, push!
要把膝盖拉上去 往上
And we keep those knees way up. Back straight.
你要吃得和他们一样
You're gonna have always what they have.
你和汤尼说他可以做教练吗
Did you tell Tawny that he could be a trainer?
这孩子买♥♥了一大堆
The kid was buying a Stoogle worth
塑形教的视频和衣服
of ShapeCult products and clothes.
他把会员期提到了36个月
He upped his membership for 36 months.
我能怎么办
What was I supposed to do?
他不能当这里的教练
He cannot be a trainer here.
他不是正式的教练
He's not officially a trainer.
我没有雇过他
I never hired him.
我只是说他可以...
I just said he could, you know...
能和别人聊聊
...feel free to talk with people.
但是 我觉得他觉得自己是教练
Yeah, but look, I think he thinks he's a trainer now.
没错 抬起来
Yes, back straight.
抬起来
Straight up.
如果你相信自己 一切皆有可能 泰安娜
If you believe in yourself, anything is possible, Tiane.
好吧 谢谢
Yeah, okay, thanks.
潘德鲁 你今天干得很不错 兄弟
Wow, Pandrew, you're crashing those reps today, bro.
-干得好 -我觉得我今天还是早点走吧
- Good job. - Think I'm gonna cut out early today.
休息一下 为你自豪
Rest up, man. Super proud of you.
汤尼
Tawny!
我们能谈谈吗
Can we talk for a second?
怎么了 你们需要点建议吗
What's up? You guys need some tips?
不用 我们不用建议
Ah, no, uh, we're good on tips.
过来
Come on in.
汤尼 我们很乐意让你成为塑形教的会员
Tawny, we really love having you as a ShapeCult member.
我做会员很开心
And I love being a member.
但是塑形教不仅仅只是一个健身房♥
But ShapeCult is more than just a gym, isn't it?
这是个家
It's a family.
我能叫你♥爸♥爸吗
Would you mind if I called you Dad?
我们还是先叫姓名吧
let's just keep it first names for now.
你看上去很棒
You know, you are looking really great.
一个月来改变了好多
Massive change for just a month.
谢谢
Oh, thanks!
我有一个小秘诀
Well, I have a little secret.
我知道塑形教有专门的冰沙和果汁
Now, I know ShapeCult has its own line of smoothies and juices,
但是觉得如果你们用
but I really think if you guys use
我的虫子松土计划
my worm-soil-aeration method,
你们就能知道能怎么锻炼肌肉块了
you'll see that it can put on loads of muscle mass.
如果你们把这个做成塑形计划就太好了
I would love if you guys would endorse it as a ShapeCult product.
塑形虫子 塑形土
ShapeCult worms. ShapeCult soil.
塑形冰沙都是用土里的蔬菜做的
ShapeCult smoothies made from veggies grown in the soil.
我们会考虑的 汤米
Yeah, we'll think about it, Tawny.
谢谢 但是现在
Thanks. Um, but for now,
我要请你不要再给我们的会员建议了
I'm gonna have to ask you that you not give tips to our members
除非他们主动要求
unless they ask for 'em.
格拉杰
Well... Graj...
我只是在帮他们成为自己想要成为的人
I'm just helping them to be the people that they want to be.
但是 事实上
Yeah, well, but the thing is that, uh...
他们不想要你的建议 汤尼
they don't want your tips, Tawny.
这不是针对你
It's nothing personal.
不是针对我
Nothing personal?
不是针对我
Nothing personal?!!
让我不能给别人建议 让他们发挥出
Being told you aren't allowed to help other people
最大的潜力 就是针对我
reach their fullest potential is very personal!!
不好意思
Excuse me!
不好意思 快速调查
Excuse me! Quick poll!
如果你们想要听我的建议就举手
Raise your hand if you want to hear my tips!
也许你们并不理解
Okay, maybe you didn't understand!
如果你们想要听我的建议
Take one of your appendages and lift it over your head
就举起你的肢过头顶
if you want me to give you workout tips!
看来你们都不想做你们想成为的人
I guess none of you want to be the people you're supposed to be.
你想过加入这样的健身房♥
You ever think about joining a gym like this?
才不呢 伙计 这是个邪教
Hell no, man. It's a cult.
名字里都有"教"
It's got "Cult" In the name!
闭嘴
Shut up!
-你说什么 兄弟 -我说闭嘴
- The hell you say, dude? - I said shut up!
闭嘴 不许说我的健身房♥
Shut up about my gym!
这小笨蛋需要修理一下
This little fool needs to get smacked up.
-现在谁是邪教 -我 随便了
- Who's in a cult now? - I am! Or whoever!
放开我
Just let me go!
我想成为怎样就成为怎样
I am what I want to be.
我最大马力
I am maxed out!
随你怎么说
Whatever you say!!
好样的 汤米
Way to go, Tawny!
孩子 过来
Hey, kid, bring it over here, huh?
你好 德尔塔
Oh, hi, Delt.
我在和我的宝贝们在睡觉
Just taking a little nap with my babies.
汤尼 你在干什么
Tawny, what the hell are you doing?
格拉杰没和你说吗
Oh, Graj didn't tell you?
他让我把冰箱改成了培育箱
He let me turn the fridge into a terrarium.
汤尼 这些虫子在咬你
Tawny, those worms are biting you.
我让他们咬小乳♥头♥
Yeah, I let them take little nibbles.
如果要做到纯天然
If the goal is to be purely organic,
吃你自己岂不是最天然的
wouldn't the most pure version of that be to feed on yourself?
我让虫子吸我的皮肤 他们会排到泥土里
I let the worms suckle my skin, they deposit it in the soil.
蔬菜就从这些土里长出来
The vegetables grow from the soil
我们就喝着我们自己身体产出来的冰沙
and we drink the smoothies made from ourselves.
生命的终极循环 完美的家庭
The ultimate circle of life. The perfect family.
合为一体 没有边界
One entity, no boundaries...
美丽
Beautiful.
是的 美丽
Yeah, beautiful. Um...
我去找格拉杰确认一下
I'm gonna go check in with Graj,
然后 我们就开始训练
and then... we'll get started on our session.
好吧
Okay.
你给了他进门的密♥码♥
You gave him the door code?
他加了120个月的会员
He re-upped to a 120-month membership.
你知道他把大冰箱
You are aware he's converted the chest fridge
变成了培育箱 还在里面睡觉吗
into a terrarium and is sleeping in it?!
这是十年的会员啊 德尔塔
It's a 10-year membership, Delt.
好了 准备好开始训练了吗
Alright, you ready for your session?
今天先从游泳机上开始吧
Let's start you out on the swim machine today.
什么
What...?!
我才是教练 该由我来让你从哪里开始
Okay, I'm the trainer. I tell you where to start.
不是了 小妹 现在是我训练你
Not anymore, little sister. Now I train you.
这太荒谬了 你不是教练
That's ridiculous. You're not a trainer.
我马上就是了
I will be soon.
格拉杰告诉我他在等职位空缺出来
Graj tell me he's just waiting for a position to open up.
你才锻炼了一个月