一路绕行（2016）

The Detour S02E05

Part 2 June 26, 2021, 8:59 a.m.

她对我很放心
Nah, she trusts me.
再说我的女人长这样
Plus, why would I screw around
我有必要乱来吗
on someone who looks like that, huh?
这不是你老婆这是一模特
That's not your wife. That is a model.
她不是模特她是我老婆
It's not. She's... She's with me.
所以你很能赚钱吗很有名吗
So you're rich? Famous?
你骑摩托吗 - 她以前是肥妞
You ride a motorcycle? - Did she used to be fat
然后不知道现在瘦下来会这么美吗
and doesn't realize that she can do better now?
什么
What?
她少一条腿吗
Is she, like, missing a leg or something?
当然不 - 她估计是聋子
No! - She's probably deaf.
都不是只是这伙计太幸运
No. Just a lucky son of a bitch.
本来是个工薪阶层
I mean, he's a lab monkey one day,
后来有一天突然成了总监
and the next day, he is an executive.
不敢相信吧
What?!
我不信
I don't buy it.
给我看你跟她的合照
Show me a picture of you and her in the same photo.
我们在一起才九个月
We've only been together nine months,
没多少合照但是
so I don't have a lot of those, but...
呃我手♥机♥没电了
Um... my phone just died.
关机了我侥幸逃脱对证了
So, there you go. Off the hook.
你某方面一定很优秀
You must be really good at... something.
Rachel你不是跟Billy在一起吗
Ew! Rachel! I thought you were with Billy.
你想跟这个屌♥丝约吗
You want to slum with this?
我不是屌♥丝 - 别这么说
Wouldn't call it "Slumming." Okay? - No!
既然如此我觉得我也该走了
And on that note, I think I should go.
你怎么这样
What is wrong with you?
你就是个
You are such a...
哦
Oh!
她们叫你什么来着
What did they call you?
蠢货 - 蠢货
Dipshit. - Dipshit.
太对了
It's so true.
行了干了这杯今天可是万圣节啊
All right, drink up! It's Halloween!
这是我最喜欢的节日了
It's my favorite holiday.
我也是 - 嗯
Mine too. - Mm!
反正就干一杯对吧 - 嗯
I mean, it's one drink, right? - Mm-hmm.
那行来吧
All right. Here we go.
喔喔喔
Whoo! Whoo! Whoo.
呃抱歉打断一下大家
Um, sorry to stop the party, y'all,
但我这儿有条从Nate女朋友带给他的重要的消息
but I got an important message for a Nate, from his girlfriend.
你们谁是Nate啊
Is one of you guys Nate?
我是Nate 嘿他叫我呢
I'm Nate! Hey, he said my name!
哥们儿这儿不止你一个Nate好吧
Buddy, there's more than one Nate here, okay?
哦那你也是Nate吗 - 对啊
Oh, hey, are you Nate? - Yeah.
嘿这哥们儿也叫Nate 俩Nate
Hey, this guy's Nate, too! Two Nates!
是是是
Yeah. Yeah.
那咱俩就是圆桌会议的两个Nate骑士了
We are the Nates of the Round Table!
伙计一边去
Buddy, get off of me!
嘿这样不好啊Nate
Hey! Not cool, Nate.
不好意思让让让让
Sorry. Excuse me. Excuse me.
嘿那个消息是什么啊
Hey. Hey, what... what was the message?
抱歉啊兄弟不接点歌♥
Sorry, man, No requests.
不是我是说那个给Nate的消息是什么啊
No, s-s... the message for Nate, what was it?
就就那个从他女朋友那儿带的
F-From his girlfriend!
孩子她要生孩子了
Baby! She's having a baby!
妈蛋
Oh, shit.
妈蛋我都不知道她怀孕了
Oh, shit. I didn't even know she was pregnant.
你就走开好吧
Just... Come on.
感谢致电自动语♥音♥信息系统
Thank you for calling the automated voice-mail system.
你有19条新语♥音♥留言
You have 19 new messages.
Nate 我可能羊水破了你在哪儿呢
Nate, I think my water broke. Where are you?
不是吧
Seriously?!
Nate 你在哪里啊
Nate, where are you?!
我不知道怎么办啊
I don't know what to do!
Nate 我需要你过来这儿我不知道怎么办啊
Nate, I need you here! I don't know what to do!
你在逗我吧
Are you kidding me?!
你去死吧
You better be dead!
我要把孩子生下来了啊
I'm having them.
我要在你不在的时候把孩子生下来了啊
I'm gonna have your children without you.
我好爱你的
I love you so much!
我只需要你
I just want you...
好吧行吧我要自己开去医院了
Okay, well, I'm gonna drive myself to the hospital.
希望在那儿见到你啊
Hope to see you there.
来吧我们一定可以的好的
Come on. We can do this. Okay.
这什么鬼
Oh, what?!
孩子他爸简直就是个小孩儿
I'm having babies with a child.
哦哦哦哦哦哦哦我的天
Oh! Oh, oh, Go... Oh! Oh, God!
你们给我停下
Stop doing that!
哇塞
Wow.
我当妈肯定超厉害
I'm gonna be really good at this.
打扰打扰一下
Excuse me. Excuse me.
嘿哥们儿嘿嘿
Hey. Hey, man. Hey, hey.
我没钱了你能帮我叫辆的士吗
I ran out of quarters. Can you call me a cab, please?
我刚叫了辆的士得等差不多一小时
I just called one, man. It's gonna be, like, an hour.
不是吧 - 你干脆去坐公交呗
What?! - Why don't you just take a bus, huh?
你那是顶假发吗因为我也有呢
Is that a wig? 'Cause I-I got a wig.
嘿嘿 Gene Gene Gene 你能不能
Hey. Hey, Gene. Gene, Gene, Gene, you got to...
有人偷了我的假发
Somebody stole a wig!
是是 Gene Gene 我我得借下你的车 Robin要生了
Yeah. Gene. Gene, I-I... I need your car. Robin's in labor.
不可以那是我的车 - 我知道是你的车
No, it's my car. - I know it's your car.
可派对才开始没多久啊 - 嗯我明白但
Party's just started. - Yeah, I get it, but...
那个扮成老头的女孩儿去哪儿了
Where's the old-man girl?
她回家了她明天还得上学呢
She went home. She's got school tomorrow.
她还是个孩子好吧拜托了我得借
She's a child, okay? Please, I need...
哦你知道她跟我说什么吗
Oh. You know what she said to me?
不知道她跟你说了啥
No, what'd she say?
她问那个衣服上写Pedro的人去哪儿了
She said, "Where's that guy Pedro?" Right?
是
Yeah.
那是因为她还想继续在派对嗨啊
'Cause she wants to keep the party going!
那你之前怎么没那么说啊 - 我知道啊
Why didn't you say so before? - I know!
耶咱们走 - 但我还是得借你的车钥匙用用行吗
Yeah, let's go! - I need your keys, though, okay?
我们走 - 好我们走
Let's go! - Okay, let's go.
嗨是我抱歉我不知道还能打给谁
Hi. It's me. Sorry. I didn't know who else to call.
嗯
Um...
我需要你的帮助
I need your help.
我不应该开车的我真的不应该
I should not be driving. I really shouldn't.
你个货混
You sheep-dip.
你说啥
What?
我是说你个粉货
I mean, you deep-shift.
你再说一遍呗她们叫你啥来着
What was it, again?
我是个蠢货我就是个蠢货
I'm a dipshit. I'm a dipshit!
对对对就是这个词
That's it.
嘿你知道吗这些座位可以往后移哦
Hey, did you know, these seats, they recline?
妈蛋
Oh, shit.
抱歉我不能停下
I'm sorry! I can't stop!
我得去看我的孩子们
I got to see my babies!
让开别挡路
Get out of the way!
现在吗
Now?!
我们是说"不"的Nate们
We are the Nates Who Say "Nate!"
赶紧走开别挡道现在马上
Get out of the way... now!
你在逗我吗从我车上滚下去
Are you kidding me?! Get off my car!
啊妈蛋啊
Aw, shit!
妈蛋妈蛋妈蛋啊
Shit, shit, shit!
Gene你醒着吗 - 嗯
Gene, you awake? - Yeah.
他妈的
God damn it.
啊啊我在干什么啊
Aaaah! What am I doing?!
Gene你还活着吗
Gene? Are you dead?
我以我可能还未出世的
I swear on the lives
孩子们的名义发誓
of my hopefully-still-on-board children
我一辈子都不会再喝酒了
that I will never drink again.