天堂镇警局（2018）

Paradise PD S01E02

Part 2 Sept. 30, 2020, 10:08 a.m.

I wanna cock stomp every one of them.
我想踩爆他们每个人的鸡鸡
I went to the academy with their chief, guy named Hancock.
我和他们的警长原来是同学他叫汉考克
We were friends, then he took away a woman
我们曾经是朋友直到他带走了
that meant a lot to me and married her.
一位对我至关重要的女士并娶了她
He's been rubbing it in my face
他从那以后
by pulling these bullshit pranks on me ever since.
一直用这些恶作剧揭我的伤疤
I don't do pranks, IKEA, or cargo pants.
我不搞恶作剧不买♥♥宜家不♥穿♥工装裤
That's all white people's shit.
那些都是白人的玩意
Shit! Michael Buble's playing at the Bandshell.
该死麦可·布雷在露天演唱
Who wants to see some Buble?
谁想去见布雷
I have had enough of this crap!
我受够了这些玩意
We are gonna take a trip to Diamond City
我们要去钻石城
and we are gonna teach Chief Hancock a lesson!
给汉考克警长一个教训
Uh... should we get Stanley down first?
我们不应该先把斯坦利放下吗
Hopson, how the hell did you get up there?
霍普森你怎么上去的
I don't know.
我不知道
Last time I was in a mess this sticky
上一次我这么满身黏糊糊
was when I taught Jack Dempsey how to work the bag.
还是我教杰克·登普西怎么舔蛋
And he came in my face.
然后他射了我一脸
Hancock! I have had it up to here with your goddamn pranks!
汉考克我来这里解决你见鬼的恶作剧
What, you're still mad that I was eating your wife
怎么你还介意我在你之前
and sucking them titties before you were?
吃你老婆的奶吸她的咪♥咪♥
Hello, Randall.
你好兰德尔
I see you're still upset that I married your mother.
你还在为我娶了你妈生气啊
Well, this shit just got weird. Hi, Grandpa.
这走向有点怪你好祖父
Don't call him that!
不许那么叫他
Randall, I can assure you
兰德尔我向你保证
that this department doesn't have time for pranks.
这个部门没空恶作剧
We're too busy doing real police work.
我们都忙着干警♥察♥的正事呢
Governor, please continue.
州长请继续
On behalf of the President,
我代表总统
it is my honor to present Diamond City Police Department
很荣幸授予钻石城警♥察♥局
with this award.
这个奖章
Of course it was me that glued all your shit to the ceiling.
当然是我把那些玩意粘到天花板上的
Gotcha!
中招了吧
Also, I never loved your mother.
另外我从没爱过你妈
I've just been racking
我过去三十年
that grease pit of hers for the past 30 years
上她就是为了
to fuck with you.
惹你生气
Double gotcha! What?
又中招了什么
Hancock, I am gonna kick your ass!
汉考克我要踢爆你的屁♥股♥
One-eighty-seven reported. All Diamond City units please respond.
谋杀案所有钻石城人员收到请回复
Copy that. We'll have to settle this later, Crawford.
收到我们回头再扯这个克劳福德
Chief! Oh, Chief! Chief!
警长警长警长
Come in, Chief! Hello?
请接听警长喂
Are you there? Are you there?
你在吗你在吗
Are you there, Chief? Are you there?
你在吗警长在吗
Chief, are you there?
警长你在吗
Yes! Dusty, what the hell is it?
在达斯廷什么事
We got a 911 call about a homo inside Paradise.
我们接到了关于天堂镇内出现同性恋的报♥警♥
Dusty, I'm sure they said "Homicide in Paradise."
达斯廷他们说的肯定是天堂镇内的凶杀案
Oh! That's a relief!
谢天谢地
False alarm, everybody. Y'all can go back to church now.
虚惊一场各位你们都回♥教♥堂吧
What the hell are you Diamond City dicks doing at my crime scene?
你们这些钻石城混♥蛋♥在我的犯罪现场干吗呢
Your crime scene?
你的犯罪现场
This is obviously Diamond City's jurisdiction.
这显然是钻石城的辖区
Actually, Chief Limpcock,
实际上软蛋警长
it looks like the body is laying right on the line
尸体似乎正处于
between Paradise and Diamond City.
天堂镇和钻石城的交界
In that case, the only fair thing to do is divide
这样的话唯一公平的办法就是
the evidence by what's actually in each of our city's jurisdictions.
按证据实际位于的辖区进行分配
Sounds good to me.
我能接受
We'll see who IDs this victim and solves the crime first.
等着看谁先辨认出受害人破了这案子吧
You're on.
挑战接受
Oh, looks like we have the victim's face,
看起来我们手里有受害者的长相
fingerprints, dental records, and you have...
指纹牙齿状况而你有
...the ass.
屁♥股♥
Ugh, shit!
该死
Here we are, Bullet.
来吧子弹
The dog fighting ring. Our first undercover mission together.
斗狗场我们第一个共同行动的便衣任务
You ready? Yeah.
你准备好了吗好了
But why am I the only dog taking it seriously?
但为什么只有我一条狗好好着装了
Maybe it's laundry day.
可能今天是洗衣日
Kevin, this isn't like pro wrestling!
凯文这不像职业摔跤比赛
You lied to me!
你骗了我
You wouldn't have come if I didn't.
不骗你你不会来的
But I promise we'll be out of here
但我保证在你上场前
before you even have to fight.
我们就出去了
All right, you're next.
行了你是下一个
Kevin! My dog's not supposed to be in there.
凯文我的狗不是来比赛的
He's not a fighting dog.
他不是斗狗
Then why's he wearing that
那他为什么穿着一件
pink cape that says "I'm a fighting dog"?
写着"我是只斗狗"的粉色披风
We have a Frank Flipper Fist Fighting
扁平拳弗兰克拳击比赛的冠军
winner!
诞生了
Why are you trying to touch me like that?
你为什么这样摸我
I'm gonna raise your hand in triumph.
我准备举起你的手宣告胜利
No, you know what? I got this.
用不着我懂了
Don't worry. All good. I can do it myself.
别担心没事我能自己做到
Bullet!
子弹
What a match!
真是一场好比赛
I've never seen a dog fight like that.
我从没见过一只狗那样打架
The crowd loved it. I'm gonna make you a star!
人们都喜欢看我要把你打造成明星
Thanks, but I don't think Bullet will be fighting any more.
谢了但我觉得子弹不会再打了
He's kidding. Of course I'll keep fighting.
他开玩笑的我当然会继续打
That's great!
太好了
Let's celebrate.
我们庆祝一下吧
These are the finest Cubans money can buy.
这是能买♥♥到最好的古巴雪茄了
Almost got it here.
差点就好了
All right.
好了
It's a little tricky.
有点麻烦
Just...
就...
Come on!
拜托
Fucking piece of shit defective lighters!
操♥他♥妈♥的次品打火机
I've got something better for you boys. I'll be right back.
我有更好的东西给你们我马上就回来
Are you think what I'm thinking? Yeah.
你和我想的一样吗是的
How does he crank off with those things? No!
他是怎么自♥慰♥的不
What are you doing? Looking for Argyle meth.
你在干什么找菱形纹冰♥毒♥
That's why we're here! Remember?
那是我们来这里的原因记得吗
Why did you tell that fishy-finned freak
你为什么告诉那个可疑的鱼鳍怪人
you'd keep fighting?
你要继续打
You saw me out there. I was awesome!
你看到我在那里的表现了我棒呆了
Stop it, Bullet. You could get hurt or killed.
不要子弹你会被伤害或杀了的
Oh, now look who's worried about me! You know what? Don't be.
看看是谁在担心我了你知道吗不用担心
The last thing these idiot dogs
那些蠢狗最不想看到的
expect are my sweet '80s wrestling moves.
就是我80年代的摔跤动作了
I am going to dominate these bitches!
我要统治这些婊♥子♥
So you're Bullet the Badass now?
那你现在是在给坏蛋点子弹看看了
No, don't be an asshole, Kevin. Actually, wait...
不别那么混♥蛋♥ 凯文其实等...
Bullet the Badass... Can I use that, for serious?
给坏蛋点子弹看看我能用这个吗认真的
It's a pretty fucking sweet name. 35yearold Scotch.
这名字太炫酷了 35年的苏格兰威士忌
I've been saving this for a special occasion.
我一直为特殊的场合留着
Okay, here you are.
好了给
Sorry, I'm 30 minutes sober.
抱歉我戒酒30分钟了
I respect that.
厉害
What do you think?
你觉得呢
Sorry, I got my tongue all over your desk.
抱歉我把我的舌头弄的你桌上到处都是
How are we supposed to solve this case using only an ass?
我们怎么只用一个屁♥股♥解决这个案子
There are two things I never question.
我从不问两件事
The creepy little Asian girl
在我脑海里轻声指挥的