天才儿童

-欧文 -干嘛
- Hey, Irwin. - Yo.
跟你赌晚饭 这球我必进
I bet you dinner I make this shot.
我要吃... 龙虾
I'll have the... lobster!
求你挑个便宜馆子
Please pick somewhere cheap.
别让他选
No, don't let him choose!
我选霍格沃茨的食堂
I pick the cafeteria at Hogwarts!
霍格沃茨不存在 欧文
That doesn't exist, Irwin.
行吧 反正不怪我
Yeah, well, that's not my problem.
愿赌服输 你看着办
You lost the bet. Figure it out.
与其晚餐自费
Hey, instead of us paying for dinner,
不如17号♥那天用上
what about a wine tasting on the 17th...
品酒会的免费入场券呀
that we have free tickets to?
地点在大西洋城唯一的一座葡萄园
It's at Atlantic City's only vineyard.
那块地曾经是黑♥手♥党♥的地盘
The Mob used to own the land.
据说那里土壤肥沃就是得益于此[埋尸]They say that's why the ground is so fertile.
其实 我们17号♥去不了
You know what? We can't on the 17th.
家里有客人要来
We're having people over.
那就奇怪了
Oh. That's weird.
电子请柬跑到垃圾箱里了吗
Well, did the Evite go to our spam?
抱歉让你误会了 凯
Oh, I'm-I'm sorry for the confusion, Kay.
我们根本没请过你们
You were never invited.
不是 就是一些
No, it's just some people
从孩子学校认识的朋友
that we're friends with at the kids' school.
没针对你们 他们是七班家长
Yeah, it's nothing personal. It's our Room Seven crew.
-七班一生一起走 -一起走
- Room Seven for life! - For life! Yeah, yeah!
-抱歉 内部梗 -没错
- Sorry, inside joke. - Yeah.
是 我知道
Yeah, I know.
因为我被打击成了内伤
'Cause it hurts me on the inside.
不过 我觉得
Well, um, but, I mean,
你们要是想来也可以
I guess it's okay if you guys want to come.
只要你们自己带椅子来
Yeah, if you just bring your own chairs.
不 不 没事
No, no, it's fine.
是我们先有计划的
We were the ones with plans first,
我们跟自己的其他朋友执行计划就行了
so we'll just do those plans with our other friends.
没错
Yeah.
我们就这么办
That's exactly what we'll do.
我们还有其他朋友吗
Do we have other friends?
麦克
Aw, Mike.
怎么了
What?
抱歉
Oh. I'm sorry.
我想的是七班的麦克
I-I was thinking about Room Seven Mike.
那家伙可好玩了
That dude's hilarious.
那小伙可厉害了
That boy's crazy.
-他比你高多了 -的确
- He's much taller than you. - He is.
我有个问题[问号♥] 马科
I have a question, Marc.
我有个感叹号♥
I have an exclamation point.
我就知道我总会试着幽默一下的
I thought I'd try my hand at humor.
我做到了
I am done now.
亲爱的
Hey, babe.
我们带些什么去丽塔和欧文的派对
So, what are we bringing to Rita and Irwin's for the party?
我们才不去呢
No, we are not going to that.
他们邀请我们是出于怜悯
That was a pity invite.
凯·莫伦决不接受出于怜悯的邀请
Kay Mollen does not accept pity invites.
可你不是凯·莫伦 你现在是凯·本奈特
Except you're not Kay Mollen. You're Kay Bennett.
本奈特家人就是靠怜悯过日子的
And Bennetts live on pity invites.
所以我们家才能登上五月花号♥
That's how we got on the Mayflower.
如果我们接受了怜悯
If we accept a pity invite,
他们就不会尊重我们了
they will lose respect for us,
不久后 我们收到的邀请就都是出于怜悯了
and soon, all of our invites will be pity invites.
瞧瞧我们的对手是些什么人
Just look at what we're up against.
这就是丽塔和欧文的七班家长朋友
This is Rita and Irwin's Room Seven crew.
天啊
Oh, my God.
如果文明终结
If civilization ends,
我想把恢复人类繁殖的使命交给这对七班家长
I want Room Seven to repopopulate the planet.
丽塔和欧文拥有另外的社交圈
Rita and Irwin have this whole other social life,
但我们只有他们
and all we have is them.
我们的朋友数量
I mean, we should at least have more friends
起码要比家里的芥末种类多才行
than we have kinds of mustard.
怎么会这样
How did this happen?
我以前在这片到处都是朋友
I used to have friends all over the place.
我中学时约的每个女孩都说
Every girl I asked out in high school said
她比较希望跟我做朋友
she liked me better as a friend.
我们会失去他们是因为
We lost them all because it's hard to keep friends
家有会纠正你说话语法的洪水猛兽
when your family is a walking hurricane
还想留住朋友 实在是太难了
that also corrects your grammar.
也许是时候找些朋友回来撑场面了
Well, maybe it's time to restock the old friend fridge.
对 对 这个不会多难的
Yeah. Yeah, this shouldn't be hard.
我们很抢手的
I mean, we're a catch.
是 如果努努力
Yeah, if we just put in the effort,
我们会找到跟我们一起喝黑♥手♥党♥葡萄酒的人
we'll find some people to drink Mafia wine with us at the...
就在"葡要再想它葡萄种植与除菌园"
"For-Grape About It Vine Yard and Sanitation"?
我要去葡萄园和你一起喝酒 妈妈
I'll go to the Vine Yard and drink with you, Mommy.
宝贝 得等你再长大些
Oh, sweetie, not until you're old enough...
够像我的旧身份证照片才行
to look like my old I.D.
我以前在体育馆从来都算不上体格矫健的
Wow. I've never been the most athletic person in the gym before.
这里是干什么的 机器人舞会
What is this, a robot prom?
这是人工智能锦标赛
It's an A.I. tournament,
参赛者是蛋港东部最厉害的计算机人才
featuring the greatest computer minds east of Egg Harbor.
今年 我们训练了一个人工智能
This year, we've trained an A.I. to recognize the smell
来识别大王花的气味
of the Rafflesia arnoldii,
一种臭名昭著 散发腐臭味的花
a notoriously foul-smelling flower.
没错 我从实验室偷到的呢
That's right. I stole it from a lab.
谁是当今的科学坏小子
Who's the bad boy of science now?
以前有过这么个人吗
Who was it before?
他们研发了一个机器人来闻一朵恶心的花
They've trained a robot to smell a gross flower?
为什么不发明个早上送他们上学的机器人
How about one that drives them to school in the morning
好让我避开那个嘴贱的管下车秩序的人
so I can avoid that mean drop-off Captain?
你一定在说凯伦 别惹恼她
You must be talking about Karen. Don't mess with her.
有天我看见她被车碾了一下
I saw her get run over one day,
还能突然站起来
and she just popped right back up.
等下 刚才那是怎么了
Wait. What was that?
我是不是看到了火花
Did I just see some sparks?
不是 她衣服上有字
No, there are words on her shirt.
我只是在看她胸前的字
I was just reading her breasts.
你不能因为我看了看字就生气吧
You can't get mad at me for reading.
不是这个 是友谊的火花
No! Friendship sparks.
也许他们和我们能成为朋友
Maybe they have friend potential.
他们 看起来不错
Oh. Them? Yeah. They seem okay,
但他们可比不上七班家长
but... they're not Room Seven.
我们可起不了七班这样的名字
Look, Room Seven is not an option for us.
我们孩子的班级不是以数字命名
Our kids' classrooms aren't even numbers.
是以学者命名
They're scholars.
难道你想大喊"诺姆·乔姆斯基班一生一起走"吗
You want to be yelling "Room Noam Chomsky for life"?
美国著名语言学家
我们已经15年没有交朋友了
We haven't made friends in 15 years.
就当这是个热身
Think of it as a warm-up.
洛奇也不是一上来就打阿波罗·克里德
Rocky didn't start with Apollo Creed.
他一开始只在屠宰场暴打了一扇牛肉
First, he beat up a side of beef.
我只看过他打苏联拳王的那一部
I only saw the one with the Russian.
那一部里对手就像个机器人
Rocky had a robot in that one.
我们过去看看他们是不是饥渴难耐
Okay, let's go see if these two are DTF--
为友谊饥渴难耐
down to friend.
等等 等下 等下
Wait, wait. Hold-hold on. Hold on.
打扰一下 我无意听到
Excuse me. I couldn't help but overhear
我的医生说我有"狗狗般的听力"
because I have what doctors call "canine hearing."
你们是在谈论我俩吗
Were you talking about us?
没错
Oh, yes.
不好意思 我们只是想和你们打个招呼
Sorry. We just wanted to say hi.
我是凯·本奈特 他是麦克
I'm Kay Bennett. This is Mike.
我是麦克
And I'm Mike.
这是我丈夫西格蒙德
This is my husband Sigmund.