成功镇凶案（2015）

我们为什么要当卧底
Why are we going undercover?
因为这就是我们做的事 我们是警♥察♥
Because that's what we do, we're cops,
我们当卧底来进行调查
we go undercover and investigate things.
我以为我们可以直接过去和她聊聊
No, I just thought we could just go, go and speak to her?
并不能 - 好吧
No. - OK.
她会立马察觉出来然后拒不开口的
She will be on to us straight away and she'll clam up,
嫌疑人就是这样的
that's what suspects do.
明白了 知道了
Gotcha, I hear you.
你要加入吗
You up for this?
走着 去当一把警♥察♥
Let's go and be cops.
当一把警♥察♥
Let's go be cops.
大家好啊
Hello, everyone, hello.
你好
Hello there.
你好
Hello.
你是Miley Cyrus吗
Are you Miley Cyrus?
反正我不是Billie Rae 有什么可以帮你
Well, I ain't Billie Rae! What can I do for you?
你好 Miley 我是Ronald Pickles
Hello, Miley, my name's Ronald Pickles
这是我年迈的姑姑Elsie
and this is my old aunt, Elsie.
你好
Hello there.
我是Elsie Pickles 就像他说的 我是他年迈的姑姑
I'm Elsie Pickles, as he says, I'm an old aunt of his.
你大概在疑惑我这辈子都做了什么
You're probably wondering what I've done all my life.
我以前也是个窈窕淑女 你知道吗 - 了解
Well, I used to be a flapper girl, you sees. - Right.
我把我全部家当都投资了烘豆
Then I used all my savings and invested it in baked beans.
赚了几百万
I made many millions from it.
然后在糖浆大饥荒时全赔了
And then I lost it all in the great treacle famine.
Elsie她 她她她 她身体很好
Elsie's, she's, she's, she's, she's doing well,
然后呢 - 但她爬不了楼梯 对吧
Right. - But she can't manage the stairs any more, can you?
对 所以我才坐着这该死的东西
No, that's why I'm in this infernal thing.
自从我失去了我的Billy
Since I lost my Billy.
那么 发生了什么
All right, what happened?
他得了腮腺炎然后去世了
Well, he got the mumps and passed on.
好多人因为这个死了哈 - 是啊
So many people do, huh? - Yeah.
太难过了 - 非常难过
It's sad. - Very sad.
不过Ronald有很多爱好 让自己充实起来
Ronald's got loads of hobbies though, he keeps himself busy.
棒极了 我是说 这很好
Great, I mean this, this has been so nice...
另外他还对把船装进瓶子里有兴趣
Also he has an interest in, in putting ships in bottles.
哇哦 - 还有演讲
Oh, wow. - And public speakings.
很棒 - 是啊是啊
Great. - Yeah, yeah.
嘿 Miley 轮到你来拼字啦
Hey, Miley, it's your go on the Scrabble.
马上来
OK, I'll be like two secs.
抱歉 那是Russell Kane
Sorry, it's Russell Kane,
他是成功故事社区最年老的成员
he's the oldest member of Success Story's community.
他很喜欢玩拼字游戏
He really loves to play Scrabble,
不过跟你说哦
but let me tell you something,
从来没人在拼字游戏上赢过我
ain't no-one every beat Miley Cyrus at Scrabble,
我拼字超厉害的
I am amazing at Scrabble.
很令人困惑 但那时真的
Confusing, but true.
你这儿有<警♥察♥学校>第七部吗
Do you have Police Academy 7?
<警♥察♥学校>第七部 是迈阿密之旅吗
Police Academy 7? What, Assignment Miami Beach?
有的 一会就来
Yeah, sure, I'll be with you.
这些家伙喜欢电影甚于喜欢20世纪80年代过时的技术
These cats love movies more than they love outdated 1980s technology.
麻烦给我一分钟好吗
So just like give me a second, right,
因为他们不会放录像
because they cannot work a VHS.
你们明白我的意思对吧 - 嗯谢谢你的帮助
You know what I mean? Right? - Well, thank you for all your help.
明白 - 你们明白我的意思吧
Yeah. - You know what I mean, bitches?
她是个可爱的女孩对吧
Ain't she a lovely girl?
她身材真好 我跟你讲啊
She's got some form on her, I'll tell you.
对 她有一台录像放映机
Right. She's got a VHS machine!
我想计划的下一步该实施了
I think the next part of our plan is about to take part.
我擅自带了一些巧克力
I took the liberty of bringing some chocolates for me.
里面的酒心是强效安♥眠♥药♥
They're laced with a powerful sleeping draught.
如果我们让Miley Cyrus吃一个的话
If we give one of these to Miley Cyrus,
一定会让她彻底晕过去
it'll knock her clean out.
然后我们就可以偷偷调查一下这个地方
Right, then we can have a sneak around the place.
发现点证据 - 明白
Find some evidence. - Gotcha.
很好
OK.
谁来给她这个 我还是你
Who's giving these to her, me or you?
你 给她的时候尽量性感点
You. And try and be sexy when you do it.
哦好的好的
Oh, yeah, yeah.
我想她应该是单身 正在寻找爱情
I think she's single and looking for love.
真抱歉 两位
Sorry about that, guys.
没关系 - 没关系
No problem. - No problem.
我们 我们给你带了点东西 如果你
We, we wanted to bring you something, if you...
只是代表我们的小小心意 谢谢你
just a little token of our appreciation, for you just...
不是想贿赂或者什么 只是点甜蜜蜜的巧克力
It ain't a bribe or nothing, just some sweet arse chocolates.
非常感谢 但是我不吃巧克力
Thank you so much, but I don't eat chocolates,
因为我不相信它们
because I don't believe in them.
听我说 这些是我这辈子吃过最好吃的巧克力
Listen, they're the nicest chocolates I've ever eaten in my life.
你看 我很喜欢这些的 非常喜欢
Listen, I love these things, I do.
但是这样很不礼貌
But that's rude not to, um...
你也吃一个 美女
Get one down you, girl.
两位 我真的不
Well, like, guys, I'm really not...
等一下
Just...
她真的喜欢 想要来这里 - 嗯 嗯
She really loves, like, wants to be here, - Yeah, yeah.
我觉得你不尝一个的话她会觉得受到侮辱
And I think she'd kind of be a little bit insulted if you just didn't try one.
我知道 但我是个素食主义者 我不能吃
I know, right, but like I'm a vegan, I can't eat...
哇哦 老妇人喜欢睡觉哈
Woah, old lady likes her sleep, huh?
哦不 我知道
Oh, no, I know.
既然你在这儿了 愿意在我的请♥愿♥书上签字吗
While you're here, do you want to sign my petition?
好的
Yeah...
你知道市长想干嘛吗
Do you know what the Mayor trying to do?
他想造一条公路直接穿过这里
He's trying to build a bypass right through this place.
你敢信么 我想都不敢想
Can you believe it?! I can't even stand to think of it.
我想他一点都不关心我可怜的老房♥客们 对吧
I guess he doesn't care about my poor old residents, right?
非常谢谢你的签名
Thank you so much for signing.
你好 这里是成功养老院 我是院长Miley Cyrus
Hello? Successful Nursing Home, Miley Cyrus proprietor speaking.
什么 不可能 开玩笑吧
What? No way, you're kidding,
真难以置信 你确定吗
that's incredible, are you sure?
好的 多谢你打来 再见
OK, thanks for ringing, bye.
你知道是谁打来的吗 - 说
Do you know what that was? - Tell me.
每月我们都会有一位演讲者
Every month we have a public speaker
来让我们开开心和普及知识
who comes here to entertain and inform our family
而他刚刚说不来了
and he just canceled.
哦哇哦
Oh, wow.
他本来要来讲瓶 中船的
He was supposed to be doing a talk on ships...in bottles.
等会儿 你感觉到我的感受了吗
Hold on a dang minute! Are you feeling what I'm feeling?
老兄 这是发生过的最棒的事
Dude, this is the best thing that ever happened!
快点 我们走
Come on, let's go.
大家听着 打开你们的助听器
OK, listen up, everyone, turn on your hearing aids.
我们请到了一位演讲嘉宾
We've got a guest speaker,
他将给你们讲瓶中船 记得我之前承诺过的吗
he's going to talk to you about ships in bottles, remember like I promised?
怎么 什么时候 为什么
How? When? Why?
你们可以问他任何问题
You can ask him anything
他知道关于瓶中船的一切
and he knows everything about ships in bottles.
兴奋吗
Are we excited?
Ronald 帮我个忙
OK, Ronald, do this for me,
求求你 别让我失望 亲爱的 你太棒了
please, don't let me down, darling, you are so great.
加油 你可以的 开始吧
Come on, you can do this, let's go.
大家好 很高兴来到这儿
Well, hi, everyone, it's very nice to be here.
就像Miley说的
Er, as Miley said, um,
我是瓶中船杰出的专家之一
I am one of the pre-eminent experts in ships in bottles.
所以 我可以确定的是
So, now I'm sure you're all aware of,
以你们的年龄 一定知道瓶中船
being the certain age you are, of the ships in bottles...
他说啥
What he say?
瓶中船 你知道那种小船吗
Ships in bottles. You know the little ships?
他说的是瓶中屎
He says he shits in bottles.
船 我说的是船 就像西班牙无敌舰队中的船 好吗
Ships, putting ships, like from the Armada, yeah?
Mary Rose 和Henry八世 你们懂了吗
Mary Rose, Henry VIII. You understand, yeah?
Nelson - 瓶子有多大
Nelson. - What size are the bottles?
它们大小各异 Russell
Well, there are various sizes, Russell.