丛林中的莫扎特（2014）

Mozart in the Jungle S02E02

Part 1 May 12, 2021, 11:31 a.m.

丛林中的莫扎特
第二季第二集
-我什么都看不到 -几点了
- I can't see anything. - What time is it?
-我什么都看不到 -几点了
- I can't see anything. - What time is it?
-嘘 -这是什么
- Shh. - What is this?
这是我的脸闪开
It's my face, get off of it.
别说了他们来了蹲下
Shut up, they're coming. Get down.
你知道吗我意识到
You know, I realized
你知道吗我意识到
You know, I realized
我以前从没来过你的公♥寓♥
I've never even been in your apartment before.
噢惨了我小费给错货币了
Oh, no, I tipped the guy in the wrong currency.
惊喜吧
Surprise!
欢迎回家
Welcome home.
回到你自己的公♥寓♥
To your apartment.
我先警告你我的汗味很重哦
I'm gonna warn you, I smell insane.
噢天啊天啊
Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.
天啊你闻起来真的很糟糕
Oh, my God, you do smell horrible.
哇这是一套很棒的公♥寓♥
Wow, this is a great apartment.
谢谢他们都住在这
Thanks, yeah, they all live here.
-很高兴见到你 -我是Bradford
- Good to see you. - I'm Bradford.
我是Bradford 我是Bradford
I'm Bradford, I'm Bradford.
这是Shariza
This is Shariza.
Shariza 你好
Shariza, how are ya?
我过去六个星期
Ugh, I've been dreaming
都在做关于洗澡的美梦
of that shower for six weeks.
嗯
Mmm.
哇
Whoa.
噢我们带回来了一堆乐器
Oh, yeah, we brought back, like, a ton of instruments.
你什么时候开始喷香水的
Since when do you wear perfume?
自从吉隆坡之行后
Since Kuala Lumpur.
而且Bradford喜欢
And Bradford likes it.
嗯
Hmm.
其实我也给你买♥♥了一瓶
Actually got you one.
或者Alex会喜欢
Maybe Alex will like it.
你是说Rodrigo吗
Don't you mean Rodrigo?
Hailey 听着
Hailey, listen,
我几乎两次掉进一个活火山里
I almost fell in an active volcano twice.
我每天的
I ate jellyfish
早中晚餐都是吃水母
every day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
如果我从中学到了什么
And if I learned anything,
那就是没时间说废话
I learned that there's no time for bullshit.
所以你是自己交代
So you gonna tell me
发生了什么事还是要我来问呢
what's going on in there or am I gonna have to do it?
或许应该由你来问
Maybe you should do it.
好吧
Okay, fine.
首先你需要给Rodrigo找个新助手
One, you need to get Rodrigo a new assistant.
我一直在努力啊但他拒了所有人
I've been trying, but he rejects everyone.
他做得决定还是你啊
He does or you do?
第二你要好好考虑
Two, you need to figure out
和Alex究竟是怎么回事
what it is that you're doing with Alex.
噢他是个好男人
Oh, he's such a good guy, though.
但我爸也是好男人
My dad's a good guy.
其实我爸是个混♥蛋♥ 第三
Actually, my dad's a dick. Three...
水母是什么味道
What does jellyfish taste like?
很有嚼劲
It's chewy.
第三
Three...
我忘记第三点是什么了
I don't remember what three is.
我很高兴你回家了
I'm so happy you're home.
这个是我的宝贝
Now this one is my baby.
噢哇还挺灵巧的
Oh, wow, that's pretty neat.
你尽可能轻地拍打它
Tap it as softly as you can.
好的
Okay.
没什么能比犀牛包皮的共鸣效果好了
Nothing resonates like rhinoceros foreskin.
呃你来真的吗
Ew, are you for real?
才不呢我开玩笑的
Nah, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
但是某种动物残骸上的皮肤
But it is some kind of a skin from a carcass.
你永远都不会相信
You'll never believe
我是怎么带着它过海关的
how I got it through customs.
我不知道你有没有听说
So I don't know if you heard,
Elizabeth邀请我搬进来和你们一起住
but Elizabeth invited me to move in with you guys.
-噢很酷啊兄弟 -嗯
- Oh, cool, man. - Mm-hmm.
Hailey允许我把牙刷放在这
Hailey let me keep my toothbrush here.
所以你应该觉得自己挺幸运的
So you should consider yourself pretty lucky.
你用什么款式的牙刷
What kind of a toothbrush do you use?
什么就很普通的那种
What? Just like a standard one.
买♥♥一支电动牙刷好吧
Get an electric one, okay?
我保证那完全是另一番风味
I promise, it's a whole new level.
还有如果你想让嘴巴
Also, get a Waterpik too,
有非一般的享受再买♥♥一个洗牙器吧
if you really wanna blow your mouth's mind.
噢不好意思
Oh, excuse me,
始终尝试从底部拖起
try to always cup it from the bottom.
像这因为单靠它三个角
Like... 'cause it can't support it
是无法承受自己的重量
with just the three horns.
[BGM 贝多芬的"月光奏鸣曲
我猜我一直想说的是
Guess what I've been trying to say is,
你可以选择你所想看到的
you can choose what you wanna see.
一切由你决定
It's up to you.
像现在你看到什么
Like, right now, what do you see?
我看到Mike搞到我们的客人很不自在
I see Mike making our guests really uncomfortable.
我看到一个精力充沛的年轻人
I see an energetic young man
他充满潜力
who is full of potential
每天都沉浸在音乐之中
who lives and breathes music every day.
-大♥师♥ -嗯我来接手
- Maestro. - Yeah, but I'll take it.
昨晚的演出
Last night's performance
不太差
was not bad.
但也不能说不差
But it was also not not bad.
懂得我说什么吗
Understand what I'm saying?
像这样我们摇摆不定
Like this, we're going sideways.
你们这样是无法飞上月球
You cannot fly to the moon like this.
不行的好不
No, no, okay?
不能再有其他干扰了
No more distractions.
别在这里
Not here.
我期待你们把自己的事情
I expect you all to leave your life
和你牛仔裤一起锁在更衣间
in the dressing rooms together with your jeans
然后再过来
and come here
把它当做你的最后一场演出来演
and do it as if it was your final performance.
下次
And next time
如果我走进这大楼
that I walk into this building,
还看见一名律师
and I see a lawyer
在舞台上周围晃悠
lingering around on the stage, okay?
排练取消
The rehearsal is cancelled.
就是这样
Just like that.
下次当我进来
And the next time that I walk in
踏上指挥台时
and I step onto the podium
我还要等你们准备完
and I have to wait for you guys
或处理完你们的闲杂事情
to finish up or wrapping your chittie-chatties, okay?
排练取消
Rehearsal is cancelled!
下次
And the next time
演出中途
that the phone rings
有手♥机♥响
during a performance,
我去他♥娘♥的♥
Puta madre.
我要你接电♥话♥ 然后说
I want you to answer the phone and say,
你好是的嗨
"Hello, yes, hi.
是的是我你知道不
"Yes, it's me, yes. You know what?
我在表演中
"I'm in the middle of a performance,
然后我正在收拾我的东西
"And I'm packing up my things,
因为你知道不我离开交响乐团了
"Because you know what? I'm leaving the orchestra.
因为我不再是这乐团的一员
"Because I'm not a member of this orchestra anymore
因为我再也不受欢迎
"Because I'm not welcome anymore,
因为排练取消了
because the rehearsal is cancelled!"
然后是那个垒球就这样了
And the softball, that's it.
到此为止不能再玩垒球了