怪猴（2025）

Right. OK. And poof and poofl
太对了 对 对 不是 我明白
Great, yeah, yeah, no, I get it.
咱们能看看另一个衣柜吗
Can we look at the other closet?
我记得 在这边吧
lt's this way, I think.
当然 跟我来
Absolutely, follow me.
噗
Poof!
你们特么是双胞胎
You're fucking twins?
你知道吗 我妈以前总说
You know, my mother used to always say
每当发生飞机失事 校车掉进河里
whenever there was a plane crash or a school bus going off into the river
或者大规模死亡事件什么的
and mass fatalities or what have you.
她总会说
She used to always say,
“看来上帝今晚保龄球打得不错”
"Looks like God's bowling strikes tonight. "
哦 怪事 我记得我没锁啊
Oh, that's odd. l don't remember locking this.
嘿 你该不会碰巧记得 我姑妈在庭院旧货售卖♥♥会上有一个上发条的玩具猴子吧
Hey, you wouldn't happen to remember if my aunt had a wind- up toy monkey at the yard sale?
哦 不 我不记得了
Oh, no, I don't think so.
哦 不是什么珍贵的童年回忆吧
Oh, not a cherished childhood memory, now, was it?
哦 人生第一个毛茸茸的玩偶朋友 充满了奇思妙想和怪诞诡奇
Oh, a first Iitle furry friend filled with whimsy and wonder?
不是 没什么大不了的 谢谢
No, it's no big deal. Thanks.
好吧
Okay.
不对 不是这把
Nope, not that one.
这钥匙要怎么弄
How are we doing with that key?
哦 你就别费那脑筋了
Oh...Don't you worry your pretty little head.
哦 我的天 我真这么说了吗
Oh mercy, did I say that out loud?
小心
Watch out!
有一说一 你还挺可爱的
You are pretty, though.
哦 -你知道吗
Oh! - You know what?
我觉得我们应该下去 -看起来我自己
I think we should go down. - lt looks like I did my own
做了一番淘汰法
little process of elimination.
不不不
No, no, no!
上面没出啥事吧
Everything okay up there?
是 一切都好
Yeah, everything's fine.
*枪不会杀人 人才会杀人
哦 见鬼
Oh, fuck.
你当时就那么站着 手没乱动
And you were just standing there, hands to yourself.
没错吧
ls that right?
是 没错
Yeah, that's right.
你是事先知道屋里有把枪 还是并不知道
And you knew there was a gun in the house, or not so much?
额 不知道
Uh, no.
好的
Okay.
我需要你暂时不要离开镇子 直到我们把事情弄清楚
I'm gonna have to ask you don't leave town until we can figure a few things out.
什么 不不不
What? No, no, no.
警官 我答应过我儿子要带他去恐怖天堂的
Officer, I promised my son that I was gonna take him to Horror Heaven.
其实呢 警官 我们改主意了
Actually, officer, we moved off going to Horror Heaven.
这里发生的事显然更重要
This is obviously far more important.
聪明的孩子
Smart kid.
找个汽车旅馆住吧
Find a motel.
我本来想说住在这儿 但这里太乱七八糟了
Il'd say stay here, but it's a goddamn mess in there.
我是说 你真的上去过吗
I mean, have you actually been up there?
就像那家餐厅
lt's like that restaurant.
意大利面城
Spaghetti City.
嘿 儿子 你要不去车上等着吧
Hey, bud, you wanna go wait in the car?
行吧 反正你
Yeah. That's your, uh,
最喜欢让我♥干♥这种事了 不是吗
favorite thing for me to do anyway, isn't it?
那我就离得远远的
Just stay away.
他们把尸体抬出来了
They're bringing the body outl
来次够 卡斯寇 来次够 卡斯寇 来次够 卡斯寇
Let's go, Casco! Let's go, Cascol Let's gol
喂
Hello?
我找哈尔·谢伯恩 谢谢 如果他在的话
Hal Shelborn, please, if he's available.
比尔
Bill?
谢天谢地 佩迪呢 他没事吧
Thank goodness, and Petey is he available too?
是 听着 我们没事 可是 额
Yeah, look, we're fine, but, um
那怪猴不在
The monkey's not here.
艾达姑妈弄了个该死的庭院旧货售卖♥♥会
and Ida had a goddamn yard sale,
所以现在可能 可能随便被谁带到哪儿去了
so it could have been, but now it could be anywhere with anyone.
额 那可糟了 麻烦了
Well, that's not good.
额 那可糟了
Looks bad.
是啊 镇上发生了各种麻烦事
Yeah, there's all kind of shit happening in town,
人们以不正常的方式死去
people dying in not normal ways.
警♥察♥说我不能离开
Police told me I can't leave.
去汽车旅馆吧
Go to the motel.
等通知
Await my signal.
你♥他♥妈♥让我等通知
Await your fucking signal?
等等 比尔 你在哪儿
Wait, Bill, where are you?
比尔 你住在镇上吗
Bill, are you living in town?
真蠢
Stupid.
谢伯恩 谢伯恩
Shelburn, Shelburn
没有
Nope.
“猴夫人”
Mrs. Monkey?
你好 如果这是关于我的广♥告♥
Hello, if this is in regards to my ad,
我很高兴地告诉你 我寻找心爱的玩具猴的旅程已经结束了
l'm happy to report that my quest for finding my beloved toy monkey is over.
感谢来电 注意安全
Thank you for calling, and be safe out there.
就在我从你的指尖滑落的那一刻
At the very moment you slipped from my fingers,
我突然知晓了一切事情的可怕真♥相♥
I suddenly knew the terrible truth about everything.
我那个傻♥逼♥兄弟转动了你的钥匙 杀了我妈
That my dumbshit brother had turned your key and killed my mom.
所以我马上回去找你
So I went back to get you as soon as I could.
但你不见了
But you were gone.
留下一个只属于我的记号♥
Leaving behind a sign for me and only me.
记号♥表明总有一天
That one day...
你会回来的
You'd be back.
于是我等待着
And so I waited.
等了很久很久
And for the longest time,
结果等了个空
there was nothing.
百分之百 纯粹 医疗级别的虚无
A hundred percent, pure, medical- grade nothingness.
但之后
But then.
你出现了
there you were.
*你好呀
* 拧动发条 看看会怎样！
突然间
Suddenly
无论我看向哪里 都有你的身影
Everywhere I looked, you were there.
如同太阳 月亮和星星一样永恒
As constant as the sun, the moon, and the stars.
仿佛你一直在俯瞰着我
As if you had always been looking down on me.
让我知道了我梦寐以求的事是真的
Letting me know what I had always wanted to be true.
你会回来帮我复仇
That you'd come back to help me seek my revenge
我回到了那些我以为你可能在的地方
I returned to the places where I thought you might be.
我愚蠢地以为自己能让你再次出现
Foolishly believing that I could make you appear again.
结果是我有了再次找到你的可能
That it was I who might find you again.
所以我为你的回归做好了准备
So I made myself ready for your return.
重新裁制我小时候穿过的葬礼西装 期待着
Reworking my old childhood funeral suit in anticipation of
会有
well.
更多的葬礼
more funerals.
这样我就能再次 见证你那可怕的荣耀
And so that I might once again bear witness to your terrible glory.
该死
Fuck!
* 后院拍卖♥♥
所以我看了看
So I looked.
一匹灰马
And behold, a pale horse.
他的大名是死神
And his name that sat on him was Death.
猴子夫人
Mrs. Monkey.
真是踏破铁鞋无觅处
And now here we are.
我们终于在一起了
Together at last.
只剩下一件事要做
With only one thing left to do.
在你无穷的智慧中
your infinite wisdom,
我相信你燃烧的正义之剑
I trust your flaming sword of righteousness
能斩断污浊之气
will cut the foul air
击中正确的目标
and smite the right person.
我知道你很清楚我在说谁
And I know you know exactly who I'm talking about.
*电子烟油
操♥你♥大♥爷♥ 烂机器
Shit, man, that sucks.
操♥你♥大♥爷♥
Shit, man, that sucks! Ah!
什么事
What?
呃
Um.
额 我是瑞奇
Uh, it's Ricky.
有屁快放 我很忙
What is it? I'm extremely busy.
好的 那么…
Okay, yeah, so...