操♥他♥妈♥的
Holy fuck.
我♥操♥
holy shit...
我不相信你
I don't trust you!
操
Oh fuck!
-撞到了 磕了一下 -继续啊你
- I hit it! I hit it! - Keep going!
我都想不起来了
Yeah I can't even remember.
-一开始是数学 挂了 -挂了
- First I had math... failed. - Failed.
后来是 学业指导课
Second I had... student success!
那门课我拿了两个学分 傻♥逼♥
I got two credits in that class, asshole.
只不过是学业指导课
Yeah but it's student success.
恭喜你啊
Congratulations,
前一年得先挂一门课才能上学业指导课
you had to fail a class the year before to even get into that.
你怎么连暑期课都会挂
How do you fail summer school?
你挂了所以又让你去 好让你再挂一回
You failed so we're gonna send you to school to fail you again?
-没错 -太烂了这做法
- Yeah. - That's a horrible idea.
-必须待在学校 -让我都没自信了
- Have to be at school for... - Just bringing down my confidence.
你有没有收到过
You ever get a friend request
其它国家的人发来的好友申请
like they live in a different country?
你就像在说 我认识你吗
Yeah you're like, how do I know you?
你怎么在脸书上找到我的
How did you even find me on Facebook?
我从没有加过墨西哥人
I've never tried to add some Mexican person.
他们总加我 我就说'人生不会重来'
They always add me so I just say YOLO.
人生不会重来 所以你就同意了吗
YOLO. So you add them up?
我加了几个墨西哥人
I add some Mexicans.
都是些五十多岁的老恋童癖
It's like "Oh yay this 50-year-old pedophile
想拿着我的头像撸管
wants to whack off to my profile picture!"
'添加好友 接受'
"Add! Accept!"
也许他能给我发点牛逼的墨西哥玩意儿
Maybe he can send me some awesome Mexican stuff.
牛逼的墨西哥玩意儿
Some awesome Mexican stuff...
把他的肉♥棒♥发给你
He'll send you his taco.
-妈的好痛 -肯定的
- Fucking hurt! - No doubt.
-痛 -你准备好了吗
- Ugh... - Alright you ready?
-我不知道 -来吧
- I don't know. - Come on.
-你可能比我健壮多了 -他都打了
- You're probably way stronger than me. - He just did it.
你比他健壮多了
You're way stronger than him...
你自己也看到的
as you can see.
-来吧 -好吧
- Just do it. - Ok.
起来
Get up!
-这才像话 -要帮忙吗
- That's my boy. - Need help?
锁住了 再来一次
Thwart! Let's go again.
不了不了
No. No.
如果你不跟他打 就跟我打
If you won't fight him, fight me.
-他比你壮 你比我壮 -没错
- He's bigger than you, you're bigger than me. - That is true.
所以现在你有体格优势
So you have the unfair advantage there.
-好吧 -握手 开始
- Alright. - Shake hands. Let's do this.
-还好吗 兄弟 -没事
- You good man? - He's good.
看起来不太好
Doesn't look too good.
我♥操♥
Holy shit.
谁在乎啊 不过是块石头 别娘炮了
Who cares? Like it's a rock, man. Stop being a pussy.
-要帮忙吗 -出了多少血
- Need help up? - How much blood is there?
不多 你没事的
Not much, you're completely fine.
-继续吧兄弟 -不
- Keep going man. - No.
你得送我回家
I just need you to walk me home.
-小妹妹得有人送回家是吧 -是啊
- You need your sister to walk you home eh? - I guess so.
是啊 祝你开心哈
I guess so. Have fun with that.
你没事的
You're OK.
我有点头晕
I'm kind of dizzy.
亚当 发生什么事了
Adam, what happened?
他有点 受伤了 从自行车上摔下了
He kind of got... hurt when he fell off his bike.
亲爱的
Oh honey...
看起来好痛哦
that looks so sore.
你的头盔呢
Where was your helmet?
-我也这么问了 -亲爱的
- That's what I was saying. - Oh dear...
你是想获世界作死大奖吗
That's a Darwin prize here.
你怎么能不戴头盔呢
How can you not wear a helmet?
我就是骑很短一段
I was like making one of those really quick things
根本不用戴头盔
where you just don't need to put it on.
是嘛 我也经常这么开车
Yeah I do that in a car a lot too.
我一个人开车 天窗也不关
I'll be driving alone and I don't have the roof on
安全带也没扣
and I'm not wearing a seatbelt.
有时候我连发动机都不发动 直接开
Sometimes I don't even put the engine in I just go.
你住在附近吗
So, do you live up here?
不 我只是来过暑假的
Uh no I'm actually just visiting for the summer.
-你每年暑假都来吗 -不 第一次
- You come up every summer? - No it's my first summer.
-这样啊 -我来看祖母和表弟的
- Oh. - Yeah I'm visiting my grandma and my cousin.
不错 我们每年夏天都来
Oh great yeah. We come up every summer.
今年是我们第一次 那个
This is the first time that we've uh...
现在我们买♥♥下了这个房♥子 还挺不错
Well we own this place now which is kinda nice.
其实乐之饼干的包装上有
Actually on the package of Ritz crackers there's instructions
做乐之饼干苹果派的菜谱
on how to make a Ritz cracker apple pie.
但里面都没有苹果
There's no apples in it.
-就直接把饼干浸湿切成两半 -恶心
- Soggy crackers, cut in half. - Ew!
-为什么不直接叫乐之饼干派 -是啊
- Why didn't they just call it a Ritz cracker pie? - Exactly.
我也想说这个
That's what I was about to say.
为什么不叫山核桃派
Why didn't they call it pecan pie?
-为什么不叫西瓜派 -写信问他们去
- Why didn't they call it watermelon pie? - Write a letter!
问我♥干♥嘛 我又不知道
Why are you asking me? I don't know!
莱利 你最喜欢什么口味的派
Riley, what's your favourite kind of pie?
乐之饼干苹果派
Ritz cracker apple.
你在干嘛 你不能就那样
What are you doing? You don't turn around
-把你的作业给烧掉 -这太蠢了
and destroy your homework like that. - It's stupid.
我不管作业蠢不蠢 你都得做完
Well I don't care if it's stupid or not, you gotta get it done.
让我保管吧
Let me borrow that.
都怪我们的老师
It's because of our teacher.
我不觉得是老师的错 应该是你的错
I don't think it's the teacher's fault, I think it is your fault.
-我什么都没做 -这就是问题关键
- I didn't do anything. - Exactly.
-你以为你怎么挂科的 -我作业做了
- Why do you think you failed? - I did work.
我没做错事 我是这个意思
I didn't do anything wrong that's what I mean.
你是怎么过的 你是个智障
Like how did you pass? You're a retard.
-看来我不是咯 -我好气啊
- I guess I'm not. - That angers me.
你挂了两次了 不是一次 是两次
You failed twice. Not even once, 'twice'.
如果你想一直坐在这无聊
Well if you wanna sit here and keep being bored
那就接着说吧 接着哔哔 想出去吗
keep talking. Keep chirping. You wanna go outside?
想干点自己想干的事吗
You wanna go do something like you want?
还是就想坐在这
Is that what you wanna do?
那你就闭嘴让我做题 我得集中精神
Then shut up and let me work. I gotta concentrate.
我得写点作业 说不定还能做完
I gotta do something. Actually finish maybe. Ugh.
说得好像你能做得完一样
Yeah 'cause that's gonna happen.
太滑稽了
This is ridiculous.
跟你的成绩一样滑稽
Kind of like your grades.
操♥你♥妈♥逼
Fuck you man!
喂喂
Hey hey!
-在奶奶面前注意言辞 -好吧
- Not in front of your grandmother. - Alright.
-我♥操♥ -要倒数吗
- Fuck. - You wanna count it down?
三
Three,
二
two...
一
one.
-有点疼吧 -稍微有一点
- Yeah that hurt a little eh? - Just a bit.
-只有一点点 -下面干嘛
- Just a teensy weensy. - So what next?
妈的
Oh shit!
快点 他来了
Hurry up, he's coming!
操♥你♥妈♥的
Fuck you man!
-还剩一个蛋 -不要浪费在这些人这
- One egg left. - Don't waste it on these people's house.
什么意思
What do you mean?
他们人不错 不要往他们家砸鸡蛋
They're nice man, don't egg their house.
那又怎样 我们对多少好人家都扔过蛋
So? You know how many people we've egged that were probably nice?
是啊 但是我喜欢这家人
Yeah but I like these people.
-我不喜欢 -别闹 把蛋给我
- I don't. - No kid, give me the fucking egg.
傻♥逼♥啊你 快走吧
Fucking idiot. Get the fuck out of here.
蠢货
Dumbass!