真假三莎伦（2018）

I'm a Trekkie, so if I was Mr. Spock
我是星际迷航迷 如果我是史波克
I would calculate it as being
我会仔细计算下这个几率
man, I'm weird sometimes.
天 我有时候确实挺古怪的
The things I think about while having sex.
我做♥爱♥时候想的都是什么事儿
Is it normal to think about so many different things
这种时候想其他事
while having sex?
正常吗？
It's like my pseudo-mentor Tyrone said.
就像我的伪导师泰隆说的
Listen up, Young Blood.
听好了 年轻人
The key to bein' a good lover
成为好情人的关键
maintainin' and not bustin' prematurely
要好好维持而不过早破灭
you wanna know what it is?
想知道怎么做吗？
Yes, please.
是的 请赐教
Oh, good, 'cause I'm finna tell ya.
很好 因为我会告诉你
Okay.
好的
While you all up in there, gettin' it on
当你们都"坦诚相见" "水乳♥交♥融"
got your groove goin' and feelin' good
"翻云覆雨"的时候
don't ever, like Andre 3000 say, ever-ever--
永远不要 就像安德烈3000说的 永远不要
Ever-ever.
永远不要
Don't ever think about how good it feels.
永远不要去想这感觉有多美妙
That's a no-no.
那是绝对不可以的
You think about your car.
不妨想想你的车
And then think about what you're gonna do tomorrow.
想想明天该干些什么
Organizing your taxes.
算下你的税款
Anything but what you're doing.
什么都行 除了你正在做的事
Man, you've gotta distract your mind.
你得挪开你的注意力
I need to distract my mind.
我得转移注意力
It's all about the mind.
一切的关键都在注意力
'Cause while she's all into it and goin' crazy
因为不管她多投入多疯狂
you've got to keep your concentration.
你得保持专注
You've got to keep your game on tight.
你得稳住你自己
I've gotta keep it tight.
稳住自己
You've got to hold your load.
你得把控住自己的管子
I'm gonna hold it.
我会把控住的
You don't wanna be no minute man.
你可不能秒射
No.
嗯嗯
The key is, think about somethin' else.
关键就在于 想想其他的事
Wait.
等下
Is it odd, me thinking about a black guy
和美女做♥爱♥的时候想着一个黑人老哥
while having sex with a hot girl?
是不是很奇怪？
Yeah, that's kinds weird.
没错 是有点怪异
Okay, somethin' else.
好了 想点别的
What am I gonna eat for lunch tomorrow?
我明天午餐吃点什么呢？
Oh.
噢
Oh my god.
我的天
Okay, get up.
好了 起来
Get off me.
从我身上挪开
Okay.
好
Wow, Jonah.
哇偶 乔纳
You are good.
你挺厉害的
But now you gotta go.
但是现在你得走了
Already?
这么快？
Let me catch my breath first, huh?
让我先喘口气 好吗？
No can do, Jonah.
不行 乔纳
No can do.
不可以
I need my beauty rest.
我得睡我的美容觉了
And American Idol's on in 15 minutes, so hey.
而且美国偶像还有15分钟就开播了 所以朋友
Come on!
赶紧的
Let's go! - Okay!
走 行
Okay.
行
Bye, I'll see you tomorrow.
拜 明天见
Yeah, yeah, okay, I'll, uh--
嗯 好 我...
Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow at
谢了 我们明天...
I guess you can say,from that point on
我想可以说 从那之后
Sharon Two and I developed a particular after-work routine.
我和莎伦二号♥开始了一段特别的下班后关系
I'm stressed.
我压力超大
Look at me! I'm looking at you.
看着我！ 我在看！
I'm looking. - Look at me!
我在看 看着我
Look, I can't without my glasses.
没眼镜我看不清
No idea what that means.
什么意思
Don't stop! Okay, yeah, great.
别停 好 很好
What are you doing later?
接下来有什么安排？
Oh yeah.
哦 棒
Uh-huh.
嗯哼
Oh, uh-huh.
噢 对了
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
对了 对了
Yeah, oh my god, to the left.
没错 我的天 往左
The the left. - There?
左边 这儿？
Uhhuh. Yeah.
没错 好
Do the swirl. Okay.
绕个圈 好
Oh, do it right.
噢 好好做
You better do it right. - Do it right.
你给我好好做 好好做
Do it right!
好好做！
So why don't you hand it to me, I'll review it
不如把你它交给我 我来审阅下
and I'm sure it's gonna be great.
我相信你做的很棒了
Uh, and we'll see where to take it from there.
然后我们再来看看接下来做什么
That sounds good.
听起来不错
I'm gonna go to the restroom. - Deal.
我先去洗手间了 好
Okay, cool. - Okay.
好了 很好 好
Bye. - I'll see at lunch.
拜 午餐时候见
Bye.
拜
Energy supplements are crucial when engaging in copulation
在交♥配♥时 能量补给是很关键的
at such high frequencies as I was.
特别是像我这么高频率的
This is enough, right?
这些够了 对吗？
Who was I kidding.
我可没开玩笑
I couldn't keep up this pace.
就这频率哥快被榨干了
I needed a getaway.
我需要逃离一下
Hello, would you like another cappuccino?
你好 要再来杯卡布奇诺吗？
Okay, awesome. - And just when I thought
好 就在我以为
I'd found the perfect hideaway spot, it happened.
我找到了绝佳的藏身地的时候 事情就这么发生了
That's when I ran into her. - Awesome.
我就是这么撞上她的 好极了
Or rather, she ran into me.
或者说 她撞上我
Oh my gosh, I am so sorry.
我的天 真抱歉
I cannot believe I just--
不敢相信 我...
That's all right,it's all right, it's--
没关系没关系
No, no, it's not all right.
不 有关系
I've ruined your jacket.
我弄脏了你的外套
I will pay for the dry cleaning.
我会支付你的干洗费
It's not a big deal, it's fine.
没什么大不了的 没事
It's okay, really, it's okay.
没事的 真的 没事
Wait, wait, wait.
等等
Don't leave.
别走
Um, let me make it up to you.
让我补偿你
It's okay, it's cool.
没关系 没事
Thank you, though.
还是谢谢你
Are you sure?
你确定吗？
I mean the coffee here is great.
这儿的咖啡很棒的
And we have the best red velvet whoopie pies.
而且我们有最好的红丝绒馅饼
And the absolute best retro psychedelic feel ever.
以及有史以来最棒的复古迷幻体验
What movie is that?
那是什么片子？
Dolemite.
《多麦特》
Rudy Ray Moore. - Yeah.
鲁迪·雷·穆尔演的 嗯
It's badass.
超酷的
We've got kung-fu,even Elvis flicks.
我们有功夫片 甚至猫王的电影
Everything retro.
所有东西都很复古
That's when I knew
那时候我发现
she was something special.
她有些特别
For fuckin' with me, you no-business
这就是敢惹我的下场 你这个游手好闲
born-insecure motherfuckers.
软蛋杂种
Hi, sorry.
嗨 抱歉
Oh my gosh, I am so sorry.
我的天 真的抱歉