非常男女（2001）

上帝
God.
我能听懂, Priscilla
It made sense to me, Priscilla.
你要因为这家伙而离开我?
You`re Ieaving me for this guy?
对不起, Jake 但是我们春假的时候才认识
I`m sorry, Jake. We met over spring break.
我可不是寻常人
I`m not ordinary.
你要因为这家伙而离开我?
You`re Ieaving me for this guy?
他叫Les...
His name is Les...
...他是我见过的最美的
...and he`s the most beautiful thing I`ve ever seen.
他的包也是
And so is his bag.
Janey Briggs, 请到办公室来一下
Janey Briggs, please report to the offiice.
我知道作为一个交换生很难...
Being a foreign-exchange student is scary...
...适应一个新学校, 一个新国家
...adjusting to a new school, a new country.
但你会发现这里的学生很容易相处
But you`II find that the students are very accepting.
我真高兴能来到美国
我的乳♥房♥♥样子很不错, 不是吗?
日光浴晒得不错
You have a sunny disposition.
你拿到课程安排表了吗?
You got your schedule?
我不需要课程安排表
我来这个学校是为了成为...
那些没办法搞上美国妞的
可怜虫的
发泄对象
那可真是太好了
Well, isn`t that wonderful?
Janey, 请进
Janey, come in.
Janey, 这位是Areola 我们的国际交换生
This is Areola, our foreign-exchange student.
Areola, 这位是Janey 她会带你去第一节课的教室
Janey will show you to your first class.
嗨
Hi.
- 我喜欢你的背包 - 谢谢
-I Iike your backpack. -Grazie.
伙计, 我听说有个便衣记者 在这里装作学生
Dude, I heard there`s an undercover reporter posing as a student.
伙计, 不可能, 伙计
Dude, no way, dude.
你们知不知道 Keller先生的英语课在哪里上?
Do you know where Mr. Keller`s English class is?
- 笔直走到底, 左拐 - 很好, 伙计
-Down the hall, on your Ieft. -Sweet, dude.
我说第一千次, “把那东西吞下去”
For the thousandth time, I said, ``Swallow that thing.``
对吧?
Am I right?
Priscilla怎么能甩了我Jake Wyler呢?
How could Priscilla dump me, Jake Wyler?
她以为她是谁?
Who does she think she is?
我送你两个词, Jake:
I got two words for you, Jake:.
毕业舞会女皇, 物质
Prom queen, material.
Austin, 她是个假象
Austin, she`s an illusion.
你去掉她的化妆, 她的衣服...
You take away the makeup, the clothes...
...她的发型, 她香水的气味...
...the way she wears her hair, the smell of her perfume...
...她舔我的“蛋蛋”时候的可爱表情....
...that cute face she makes when she`s tonguing my balls....
看, 她是可以替代的
Look, she`s replaceable.
只要长得好, 以及一个好的男朋友...
Given the right Iook, the right boyfriend...
- ...女孩就能成为毕业舞会皇后 - 我感觉有人想打赌了
-...any girl could be prom queen. -I smell a bet.
Jakey, Jakey, 就要犯一个...
Jakey, Jakey, about to make a big...
...错误（mistakey）
...mistakey.
就以此下注: 我来挑选这个学校里最没救的女孩...
Here`s the wager:. I`II pick the most hopeless girl at this school...
...我赌你不能把她变成毕业舞会皇后
...and I`II bet that you can`t turn her into prom queen.
我赌了, Austin
You`re on, Austin.
我赌你输...
I`II bet you Iose that bet...
...不过学到更重要的一课并最后胜出
...but Iearn a much more valuable Iesson and win.
在生活中, 我是说
In Iife, that is.
我和你们赌了
You`re both on.
很好
AII right.
让我们来给你找个毕业舞会皇后, “请给我找个毕业舞会皇后”先生
Let`s find you a prom queen, Mr. Let`s-Find-Me-A-Prom-Queen.
嗯, Areola 我注意到你的口音一直在变
So, Areola, I noticed your accent keeps changing.
你是哪里来的?
Where are you from?
我不能告诉你...
I cannot tell you that...
...因为我只是个普通的国际交换生...
...because I am a generic foreign-exchange student...
...来自哪个国家是无关紧要的
...whose country of origin is of Iittle importance.
好吧, 祝你化学课开心
Well, have fun in chemistry.
好的, 亲爱的, 午茶时间见
Rightio, Iove. See you at teatime.
她怎么样?
What about her?
- 她的背有点高啊 - 那是驼背
Baby`s got back. Hunch, that is.
不, 太简单了
No, way too easy.
- 我没有色素 - 每个弹吉它的女孩都很正
-I have no pigment -Any girl with a guitar is hot.
我需要染色剂
I need sunscreen
就算她是白化病嬉皮士 她也可能成为毕业舞会皇后
Even a hippie albino. She could be prom queen.
Fratelli姐妹怎么样?
What about the Fratelli sisters?
她们有点破相并且连在一起
So they`re slightly disfigured and connected.
不过要是合在一起的话 她们两个就会变成一个很不错的妞
But combined, those two make up one pretty decent chick.
- 我愿上她们! - 我知道, Reggie Ray
-I`d do them! -I know, Reggie Ray.
我在寻找一个真正不像样的
I`m Iooking for somebody really messed up.
我是说一个真正的屎蛋
I`m talking about a real shitbomb.
喔, 屎蛋出现了
Well, bombs away.
不, 不, 不, 谁都可以别是她! 别是Janey Briggs
No, no, no, anyone but her! Not Janey Briggs.
伙计们, 她戴眼镜而且还扎马尾辫
Guys, she`s got glasses and a ponytail.
工装裤上还粘有颜料! 这都可以吗?
She`s got paint on her overalls! What is that?
她不可能会成为毕业舞会皇后
There`s no way she could be prom queen.
该死, 那可真怪
Damn, that shit`s wack.
瞄准头部!
Aim for the head!
你能想象她们在里面干什么吗?
Can you imagine what they do in there?
老天! 奶牛啊!
Holy cow.
伙计们, 清醒一点吧
Guys, get your heads out of the gutter.
只不过是个更衣室, 那里不会比这里...
It`s a Iocker room. It`s no sexier in there...
...更性感
...than it is in here.
Molly, 你能帮我脱掉内♥裤♥吗?
Molly, can you help me take off my panties?
等一下, 我手上都是洗液
Hold on, I`ve got Iotion on my hands.
没关系, 你可以用嘴
That`s okay. You can just use your mouth.
谢谢, Peters小姐
Thanks, Miss Peters.
那么...
So...
...谁还想和全班同学分享他的诗?
...who would Iike to share their poem with the class?
Keller先生? 这儿, 就这儿, 谢谢
Mr. Keller? Over here. Right here. PIease.
- 有谁吗? - Keller先生!
-Anyone? -Mr. Keller!
- 我不确定我们是否应该这么做 - 安静, 我想我听到她们了
-I`m not sure we should be doing this. -Quiet. I hear them.
嗨, 我发现了一个“奶牛”!
Hey, I found a buffalo nickel!
这可真爽啊
This is gonna be good.
我想我看到乳♥头♥了
I think I see nipple.
你觉得我们应该让她们知道我们在上面吗?
You think we should Iet them know we`re up here?
嗨, Molly, 我的笼头的热水坏了
Hey, Molly, the hot water`s not working on my shower.
- 介不介意我用你的一起洗? - 当然不, Christy
-Mind if I share yours? -Not at all, Christy.
但是我们会贴得非常近
But we`re gonna have to get real close.
没事. 我贴着你的背怎么样?
Okay. How about I press up against your back?
伙计, 这儿太热了
Man, it is hot in here.
我要脱掉汗衫
I gotta take off my shirt.
怎么?
What?
没有押韵也行
Doesn`t even have to rhyme.
不是诗歌♥也行
Doesn`t even have to be a poem.
请选我, 选我就对了
PIease pick me. I`m the one.
好的...
Yes...
...Ricky
...Ricky.
-“我喜欢Janey的十点” - 哦, 又是那个
-``Ten Things I Love About Janey"` -Oh, not again.
作者Ricky Lipman
By Ricky Lipman.
我喜欢Janey说话的样子 我喜欢Janey走路的样子
I love it when Janey talks I love it when Janey walks
我喜欢Janey喝水的样子 我喜欢Janey眨眼的样子
I love it when Janey drinks I love it when Janey blinks
我喜欢Janey说“hi”的样子
I love it when Janey says hi
我喜欢Janey说“英语课见”的样子
I love it when Janey says ``See you in English ``
我喜欢上课时坐在Janey旁边
I love sitting next to Janey in class
我喜欢在南街1465号♥从Janey窗外看她
I love staring into Janey`s window At 1 465 South Pass
我喜欢跟着Janey去商场
I love following Janey to the mall
我还喜欢
And I love
收集Janey的头发
Collecting strands of Janey`s hair
并把它们揉成Janey毛团
And rolling them up Into little Janey hairballs
谢谢, Ricky, 带给我们有趣的诗歌♥
Thank you, Ricky, for that interesting poem.
我真不敢相信我们刚才所做的事, Molly
I can`t believe what we just did, Molly.
那是一辈子都不会再有的经历
It was a once-in-a-Iifetime experience that will never happen again.
我不知道你们怎么样...
I don`t know about you guys...
...但我真的为Christy和Molly感到自豪
...but I am really proud of Christy and Molly.
我们回去吧
We`re going back.
- 穿上汗衫 - 我在找我的
-Put on my shirt. -I`m trying to get mine.
中头奖了!
Jackpot.
女孩上厕 - 厕不是我们想看 - 看的
Girl go pee-pee not what I want to see-see.
我同意 - 同意