第一足球队

Cheers. You're a fan?
当然是了 现在我要让你签了这个
Certainly am. Now, I'll just get you to sign this.
这是测试吗
Is this a test?
可以是
It can be. Yeah.
签给格雷厄姆 我们看看你怎么样
Make that out to Graham and we'll see how you get on.
-这是你的名字 -谁的名字都有可能
- That's your name. - Could be anyone's name.
这是我的名字
It... It is my name. Yes, yeah.
-太好了 -欢呼 结束了吗
- That's great. - Right, cheers. Is that it?
没有
Oh, no. Um,
我们来谈谈你所承受的巨大压力
let's talk about the tremendous pressure you're under.
-什么 -球迷距离球场很近
- What? - The fans here are so close to the pitch
你肯定会听到关于你表现的各种评论
you must be able to hear every comment about your performance.
说真的 确实能听到
To be fair, I can actually, yeah.
说到这支队伍的未来
Yeah, and as the future of this team,
这些人的多年的希望与梦想
I mean, these people's hopes and dreams for possibly
将寄托在你们的肩上
years to come will be resting on your shoulders.
-是啊 -你表现如何
- Yeah... - How you perform
会从根本上影响许多人的生活
fundamentally affects so many people's lives.
我能喝杯水吗
Can I have a glass of water, please?
但不知是他们的生活
But it's not just their lives, is it?
还有他们身边人的生活
It's the lives of people around them as well.
你在周六比赛上的表现会决定
How you play on a Saturday determines whether they go home,
他们是高兴地回家 还是回家冲孩子大吼大叫
you know, happy, or whether they go home, scream at the kids,
把晚餐扔到地上 踢狗一脚
throw the dinner on the floor and kick the dog.
这份压力很大
It's incredible pressure.
他们会踢狗吗
They kick their dogs?
如果你输了 他们肯定会
Well, if you lose, I'm sure they do, yeah.
我很确定
In fact, I'm certain of it.
我已经开始运作了
Yeah, got the ball rolling already, actually.
转发几篇有趣的文章
Um, a few retweets of interesting articles.
给其他的推文点赞
Liking a few other tweets.
告诉人们品牌的理念
Just to give people an idea of the brand,
赚取一些粉丝之类的
you know, gain new followers and so forth.
-我喜欢 -进展得很顺利
- OK. I like it. - Yeah, it's coming along nicely.
一条转发又得到了150次转发
One of the retweets actually got 150 further retweets,
这样很好 也符合制订的计划
which is good, and precisely the plan, as discussed.
这是我有过最多的转发了 让我看看
That's the most I've ever had. Let me see.
是这个吗
Is this it?
因为你发的
Cos the thing you tweeted
是一片文章 关于地球是平的
is an article about how the Earth is flat.
没错 就是这篇
Yes. Yeah, that's what it is.
有争议的想法有着高参与度
Yeah, controversial ideas have a high engagement rate,
这是个很好的开始方式
so it's a good way to get started.
但人们不会觉得我认为地球是平的吗
But won't people think that I think the Earth is flat?
或许吧 但转发不代表推荐
Maybe. But retweets aren't endorsements.
-这是什么意思 -快看 还在上涨
- What does that mean? - Look, it's catching on.
已经涨到200了
Already up to 200.
但地球不是平的 是圆的
But the Earth isn't flat, though, is it? It's round.
那我们为什么看不到地平线
Why can we see the horizon, then?
它为什么不消失呢
Why doesn't it just drop away?
250了
Oh, 250.
250是个不错的数字
250's a good number!
欢迎来到我的世界
Welcome to my world
我是一名顶级的
of being a top professional
专业社交媒体营销行政助理
social media marketing assistant executive.
-什么情况 -皮蒂在开记者会
- What's happening? - Petey's doing a press conference.
等等 你不知道吗
Hang on... Didn't you know?
我当然知道
Yes, of course I knew.
奥利维亚 记者会
Olivia, press conference.
好
Yep.
或许他要退役了
Maybe he's going to retire.
天啊 我再也不想要什么了
Oh, God, I've never wanted anything more.
你们好 感谢大家能来
Hello. Thanks to everyone for coming.
你们后面那些肥猪能坐下吗
Can all you fat twats at the back squeeze in?
我在这里是为了宣布
All right, so... I'm just here to announce
我很高兴克里斯·布思
that I am very happy with Chris Booth
被任命为这个俱乐部的代理经理
being made caretaker manager of this club.
他绝对是临时经理的最佳人选
He's absolutely the right choice as an interim manager
他在职期间 我会全力支持他
and I'm backing him 120% while he's in the job.
我会回答几个问题
I'll take a few questions.
-说 -皮蒂 大家都说你是这支队伍的非官方领导者
- Yes? - Petey, you're known as the unofficial leader of the team.
现在克里斯执教了 这点会改变吗
Is that going to change now that Chris is in charge?
人们用不同的方式来尊重我和克里斯
People respect me and Chris in different ways.
他们害怕我的能量和能力
They're scared of my power and ability,
大家对他的尊重不明显
whereas it's not as obvious that people respect him,
因为他们都把心中的怒火和他说
because mostly they take the piss behind his back.
但我要说清楚
Let me be clear, though.
这份工作可以落到我们俩任何一个人身上
The job could have gone to either of us,
如果落到了我身上
and if it had gone to me,
虽然许多人说应该这样 我敢肯定
as many say it should have, I have no doubt
克里斯会支持我的 因为我是更好的球员
that Chris would support me... as the better player
有着更好的数据 以及更好的足球头脑 下一个
with a better record and more of a footballing brain. Yes?
皮蒂 你听到克里斯是经理的时候有何感想
Petey, how did you feel when you heard Chris was the manager?
高兴
Happy.
说真的 高兴
No, seriously. Happy.
满脸笑容 非常高兴
Like, with a smile. Happy like that.
你在摇头 你可能觉得我会想
You're shaking your head. You think maybe I thought,
"真是神经病 肯定选我啊 这是我应得的"
"That's mental. I'm the clear choice. I fucking deserve this"?
然后把手♥机♥扔到墙上
Then chucked my phone against the wall
然后去狠狠做几组卧推之类的
before smashing out a set of heavy bench press, or something?
不 我很高兴 下一个
No, mate. Happy. Yes?
他看起来可不高兴
He don't seem happy.
团队酒店
比赛前四小时
他没吓到你吗
So, he didn't scare you, then?
吓到我 运动心理医生为什么会吓到我
Scare me? Why would a sports psychologist scare me?
我们在美国经常和他们交流
We spoke to them all the time in the US.
都是套路 关于我想要什么
No, it was the standard shit about what I want,
我要如何达成
how I'm going to achieve it.
你需要跟他们说你是重生处♥男♥吗
Did you have to mention being a born-again virgin?
我没说 因为就没有这么个东西
I didn't, because it's not a thing.
维吉尔·范迪克 荷兰职业足球运动员 利物浦司职中后卫
闭嘴吧 处♥女♥·范迪克Shut up, Virgin van Dick.
他来了
Oh, shit, here he comes.
新经理的第一次首发名单公告
New manager's first team sheet.
抱歉让你们悬而未定
OK, sorry to keep you all in suspense.
我们一会儿宣布队伍名单
We'll do the team in a moment.
首先 皮蒂 我能跟你单独聊聊吗
Firstly, Petey, could I just have a quick word in private?
-不行 -你说什么
- No. - Sorry?
不 你不行
No, you can't.
但我得跟你聊聊
But I need to talk to you.
-不行 -好吧 那我在这儿跟你说
- No. - OK. Well, then, I'll have to tell you here...
啦啦啦 我不听
La-la-la-la-la-la. Not listening!
尽管这场比赛我不让你上场
..That although I'm dropping you for this match,
但我会扭曲事实 说你受伤了
I'm happy to bend the truth and say that you're injured.
你才会受伤呢 我要打断你的鼻子
You'll be injured, mate! I'll break your fucking nose!
我没指望你会开心 但是...
Yeah, I didn't expect you to be happy, but...
滚蛋 你这个讨厌鬼
Fuck off, you prick-face!
我摔门了
I've slammed that!
好 现在公布名单
OK. Right, here's the team.
杰克 你在
Jack, you're in.
因为皮蒂"受伤"了
And because Petey is "injured",
我们要扯掉一名中后卫
we're going to drop a centre back,
换上一名右后卫
switch in a right back, so...
马蒂第一次上首发 干得漂亮 马蒂
..Mattie gets his first start. Well done, Mattie!
干得漂亮
Well done, boys!
这太棒了
This is amazing!
我们承受着巨大的压力
We're under tremendous pressure.
新的曙光 新的经历 新的联赛
New dawn. New manager. Cup game.
简直不能更好了 加油
Don't get better than this. Come on!
客队更衣室
我虽然没被选中 但今天依旧很高兴
I might not have been picked but I'm having a great day too.
得到了更多的赞
Getting way more likes than before.