白头神探（1982）

Police Squad! In color.
白头神探！TV版
Starring Leslie Nielsen.
主演：莱斯利·尼尔森
Also starring Alan North.
联合主演：艾伦·诺斯
And Rex Hamilton as Abraham Lincoln.
雷克斯·汉密尔顿扮演 亚伯拉罕·林肯
Tonight's special guest star, William Conrad.
今晚的特邀演员：威廉·康拉德
Tonight's episode, Dead Men Don't Laugh.
今晚的故事是：死人不要笑
And all the rabbits just kept hopping along.
兔子全跳了起来
Well, things are really rough all over though.
不过 这些都不算什么
Last week I took my family to Disneyland. We get off the freeway.
上周我带家人去迪斯尼乐园 刚下高速公路
Sign said "Disneyland left," so we went home.
路标上写着：“迪斯尼往左(离开了)” 所以我们就回家了
Well, on behalf of the management,
好吧 代表这里的管理层
and I'd like to be half of the management,
我喜欢代表管理层说话
please drink up, enjoy yourselves and I'll see you later.
请畅饮起来 慢慢享用 待会儿见
That's a very good show, Joey.
表演真精彩 乔伊
Boss wants to see you. Oh, yeah.
老板要见你 哦 是吗
Vic tells me that some of the money I gave you to pay the Frenchman was missing.
维克跟我说 我给你用来 付给法国人的钱不见了
The Frenchman was very upset.
法国人非常不爽
Let me take your coat.
我来帮你挂外套吧
And when he's upset,
法国人不爽
I'm upset.
我就不爽
Look, I... I don't care what they say. I didn't steal a thing.
瞧 我不管他们怎么说 总之我没有偷东西
So what do I tell the Frenchman?
那我怎么跟法国人交代呢？
Just tell him...
就告诉他
I'll take care of everything.
我一切都会搞定的
Veronica, I'd never double-cross you. I swear on my life.
维罗妮卡 我从没出♥卖♥♥♥过你 我用生命发誓
Listen, Joey, that's good enough for me.
听着 乔伊 有你这句话就足够了
Come on, let's have a drink and forget about it.
来吧 我们喝一杯 忘了这件事吧
Hey, w-we make a great team, don't we?
我们是最佳团队 不是吗？
Let's toast to it.
让我们为此干杯吧
Here's to your health.
祝您健康
Just tell the Frenchman I'll take care of everything.
就告诉法国人 我一切都会搞定的
Put up your hands. Oh.
把手举起来！
My name is Sergeant Frank Drebin,
我是弗兰克·卓宾 警官
Detective Lieutenant Police Squad.
特警队的探长
I was driving home Mary, the boss' wife,
我正开车送玛丽回家 她是我上司的妻子
when I received an urgent call to report to the city morgue.
然后接到了紧急呼叫 要去市里的停尸房♥报告
I raced over.
我迅速赶了过去
What had originally appeared to be a routine drunk driving fatality
最初看起来像是 常规的酒驾死亡
was now developing into a somewhat more involved situation.
随着发展 这里面还牵涉更多情况
Even though the reported crash had been a sizable one,
虽然报告中说的意外事故 可能性最大
various elements of the victim's bloodstream had led the police coroner
但受害者血液中的一些元素
to suspect something more.
让验尸官有了更多猜想
this kind of tsuris.
这次我们省掉大♥麻♥烦了
A battery of pathologists and reconstruction
一群病理学家 和 事故还原专家
experts were assigned to the case.
被派到了这件案子
Crime can be a terrifying threat to members of a community.
对社区民众来说 犯罪是个可怕的威胁
And we had no intention of letting this or any other go unchecked.
我们不能放任这种事情不管
When I arrived at the morgue,
当我赶到停尸房♥
my boss had already begun to investigate the physical evidence.
我的上司已经在调查物证了
As was our custom in such cases, we began to talk.
根据我们对这种案件的惯例 我们先谈话
This is disgusting.
这太恶心了
Yeah, I can't take looking at that sort of thing.
是的 我无法直视这种状况
Don, where have you got the body of Joey Koldys?
唐 你把乔伊·寇迪斯的尸体弄哪儿去了？
Oh, right here. Excuse me.
在这儿 请让一下
It's a typical 415.
这是典型的415案件
415? Yes.
415？ 是的
The body was found 415 feet from the car. Oh?
尸体在 离汽车415英尺处 被找到
It must have been a terrible accident. Yes.
一定发生了很严重的事故 是的
But the crash didn't kill him. Oh?
但他并非死于撞车
This man died of a drug overdose.
这个人死于药物过量
Not only that, gentlemen,
不仅如此 先生们
but the quantity involved was so massive
而且涉及量非常大
that it is my opinion Mr. Koldys' death
我个人认为 寇迪斯先生的死
was either suicide or murder.
要么是自杀 要么是谋杀
Now, gentlemen, if you'll excuse me.
现在 先生们 我失陪一下
You know, Frank, there's another thing about Joey Koldys.
你知道吗 关于乔伊·寇迪斯的事 还另有隐情
He was a courier for a major drug running operation
他其实是一件大毒品案的情报员
and a police informant.
也是一名警方线人
I think he was murdered.
我认为他是被谋杀的
Well, you think he was killed because he was a stoolie?
你认为 他是做为奸细而被杀害的？
Maybe.
有可能
He was always bragging about all the big money he handled.
他以前总是吹牛 说他掌管了大笔钱
Maybe he got stupid and tried to rip some off.
也许他犯了傻 想中饱私囊
Thanks again, Don. Oh, you're welcome.
再次感谢 唐 不客气
Multiple bruises of the upper torso,
上肢存在多处瘀伤
some indication of cardiovascular failure.
有心血管衰竭的迹象
Turning to the weather,
现在转播天气预报
we have a cold front moving in from the west
一股冷空气 正从西部移♥动♥
that'll bring us some showers tonight.
今晚会有阵雨
Now, here's the latest from Neil Diamond,
现在 这是尼尔·戴蒙德带来的最新情况
going out to Margot from Barry.
现在来段音乐
Ed? Frank.
艾德 弗兰克
File on Koldys?
寇迪斯的文件？
Yeah, yeah, it's a complete detailed report.
耶 是的 一份完整的详细报告
Born 1942 in Philadelphia.
1942年出生于费城
In and out of foster homes till the age of 15.
15岁之前 进过很多寄养家庭
Then he moved into Smith's home.
之后他搬进了史密斯的家
He wasn't happy there either. Then he fought Larry Holmes.
他在那里还是不开心 然后他和拉里·霍姆斯打架
Last known address was a mobile home in Alabama.
近期的住址是 阿♥拉♥巴马州的拖车住房♥
Married one child. That didn't work out, so he married a grown woman. Hmm.
已婚 育有一子 具体不详 那他娶了个成年女性
I wonder how Joey got involved with a dope ring.
我想知道 乔伊怎么又参与了贩毒集团
He was a comedian at a nightclub called Mr. V's.
他曾是一名喜剧演员 在“Mr.V”的夜♥总♥会♥
The place was a front for a dealer named Veronica Rivers.
有个毒贩叫维罗妮卡·里弗斯 用这地方来做幌子
Unfortunately, our contact in the organization is gone now, Frank.
可惜我们在该组织里的线人已经死了 弗兰克
And what's worse is we don't have a line on the supplier,
更坏的是 我们没有供货商的信息
some guy called the Frenchman.
那家伙叫法国人
Hmm. Until we get him, there's no sense going after the little fish.
既然没找到他 就先不去逮这条小鱼
That's right. And to get the big fish, we're gonna need some bait.
没错 要逮到那条大鱼 我们需要诱饵
Can we get anyone else on the inside?
我们还有其他人知道内情吗？
Well, there is a job at Mr. V's open right now.
那就得跑一趟了 “Mr.V”还在营业呢
Joey's.
炮衣糖？
Mr. V's is a high-class operation in the exclusive Shorewood area
“Mr.V”是肖尔伍德地区 独有的一家高档会所
that had launched the careers of some of the biggest names in show business.
很多娱乐圈的大牌 都是从这里开展事业
Although alleged to be a mob hangout by Ricky "The Weasel" Saltstein,
虽然被 瑞基·猥琐·索斯坦 称为流氓基地
we had no hard evidence against the club.
我们没找到 不利于俱乐部的铁证
I decided to put in my application for Joey Koldys' job.
我决定投职 去调查乔伊·寇迪斯
Madam.
女士
Excuse me. You the manager? Uh, yes.
打扰了 你是经理吧？ 是的
I'm an entertainer from out of town. I hear you have an opening.
我是外镇的艺人 我听说你们还缺个人
Sorry, pal, we filled it.
抱歉 哥们 我们已经招到人了
Nicky, where have you been? Hurry up, will you? You're almost on!
尼基 你去哪儿了？快点 好吗？该你上场了！
I missed the bus. Look, we already got an entertainer.
我没赶上公交车 瞧 我们已经有艺人了
Why don't you come back in a couple of weeks?
你为什么不 等一阵再来呢？
You Nicky McBreen? Yeah.
你是尼基·麦克布林吗？ 是的
You're under arrest. For what?
你被捕了 为什么？
For reproducing the accounts, pictures or descriptions of a major league baseball game
非法录播 职业体协棒球比赛 的报道、画面或描述
without the express written consent of the commissioner.
而没经过 授权者的书面同意
Okay, so I taped the game. All right, let's go.
是的 我录播了球赛 好吧 我们走吧
I had a few friends over, but I... but I didn't charge them.
我就请了几个朋友 但没有收他们的钱
All right, a couple of bucks a head.
好吧 每人交了几块钱
Hey, what're you doing? Without him, I got no show!
嘿！你在做什么？没了他 我怎么开演！
Hey, what about me? I'm hot and ready to go.
我来怎么样？我能唱能演 随时可以上场
Looks like I got no choice. What's your name?
看来我没有选择 你叫什么名字？
DeWonderful. Tony DeWonderful.
不精彩，托尼·不精彩
Tony. You're on.
托尼 由你上场
Ladies and gentlemen, the Johnny Friendly Trio.
先生们女士们 强尼温馨三重唱
Well, I just flew in from out of town and
好了 我从外地乘机 刚飞到这里
a guy in the airport came up to me and says, "Give me $5 till payday,"
机场有个家伙过来跟我说： “给我5美元 发薪水就还你”
and I said, "Well, when's payday?"
我说：“那什么时候发薪水？”
And he said, "How do I know? You got the job."
然后他说：“我怎么知道？工作是你的。”