百事，我的战斗机呢（2022）

从一个长♥期♥任职的联邦法官的角度来看
From a long-tenured, federal judge's perspective,
这可能不太像一个合理的奖品
it may not have seemed like a legitimate offer.
但我可以告诉你
But I can tell ya,
无数看过那个广♥告♥的我的同龄人都认为这个奖品是真的
millions of my peers saw the commercial and thought it was an offer.
你的宣传受众是一个特殊的群体
You're advertising to a specific group.
你应该去问那个群体：“它可信吗？”
You should be asking that group, "Is this credible?"
我想你会发现他们中的大部分人
I think you'd find a majority of those people
都会觉得它很可信
would find that credible.
我很抱歉这么说 我认为这是一个企业法官做出的企业决定
I think it was a corporate decision from a corporate judge, I'm sorry to say.
一路上坡
Onward and upward.
我们试试登顶吧
Well, we're gonna give the top a try.
嘎吱嘎吱继续走
Crunchin' along.
他看到了开篇
He saw an opening, took a clever shot,
做出一次聪明的尝试
尝试让我们和解或者打赢官司
trying to either get us to settle or win a court case.
要知道 这两者都很成功
And, you know, they were unsuccessful in both.
不过 向他致敬
But, you know, hats off to him.
我非常为他骄傲 应该有人这么做的
I am really proud of him for doing that, and somebody should have.
那就是一个奖品他应该得到那架飞机
I mean, it was an offer, and he should have got the jet.
那个时候 我觉得：“该死
By this time I was feeling like, "God dang,
也许我应该接受之前的和解” 对吧？
maybe I should have taken that early settlement," right?
我累了
I was tired.
是时候翻篇了
It was time to turn the page.
但我还是不断接到来电
But I kept getting calls.
不再是电视台的电♥话♥
And instead of calls from television stations,
我开始接到法律学院的电♥话♥
I started getting calls from law schools.
一位法学教授打电♥话♥给我
A law professor called me up years later,
几年后
他想跟我聊聊那个案子
and wanted to talk to me about the case.
我说：“你是怎么知道这个案子 怎么找到我的？” 之类的
And I said, "How do you even know about this case, or find me?" And so on.
他说：“哦 不 这案子法学书里写了
He said, "Oh, no, no, no, it's in the law books."
在判例书里” 我说：“哦 是吗？”
"It's in the casebook." I said, "Oh, really?"
我都不知道
I had no idea.
快进一下 我儿子几年后进了法学院
Fast forward, my own son is in law school years later,
电♥话♥响起来了 他说：“嘿 爸爸你了解鹞式战斗机的事吗？”
the phone rings, and he says, "Hey, Dad, you know anything about a Harrier Jet?"
我说：“什么？知道”
And I was like, "What? Yeah."
我问：“为什么？”
Like, "Why?"
他说：“好吧
And he said, "Well,
这是一个了解合同法界限的关键案例”
it's a critical case in understanding the boundaries for contract law."
我们听过各种各样的人在教室里争论这个案子
We heard from all kinds of people debating it in classrooms.
大部分人都认为我们应该得到那架鹞式战斗机
Most people thought we should have gotten the Harrier Jet.
只要加上几个零
Just add a couple of zeros.
它并不会影响广♥告♥的结构或性质但却把价格定得让人望而却步
It has no impact really on the structure or nature of the ad.
Just make the price prohibitive.
有天晚上 我们正在看《危险边缘！》我出现在了
One night we're watching Jeopardy!, and I come on
该死的《危机边缘！》问题里
as a freaking Jeopardy! question.
当这家苏打公♥司♥开玩笑说要提供一架飞机时 约翰伦纳德试图兑现它
When this soda company jokingly offered a Harriet Jet,
John Leonard tried to claim it.
-迈克尔-百事可乐？
-Michael. -What is Pepsi?
为了我的职业生涯、我的客户、我公♥司♥的利益
For the health of my career, my client, my agency,
我想要不喜欢约翰伦纳德
I wanted to dislike John Leonard.
但另一方面 如果年仅20岁我就能把这事做成
On the other hand, if I was 20 years old, and I could figure this thing out,
我一定会兴奋死的
I would have been damn excited.
我觉得他就像嘉年华上拿着硬币的小孩
I kind of view him as a kid with a quarter at the carnival
他就是想要赢得嘉年华的那些游戏
who wants to beat the carnival games.
而你得支持这一点
And you kinda gotta root for that.
甚至 回顾往昔 我确实支持 因为…
Even, in retrospect, I do, because
这是马克吐温这是美国精神的一部分
it's Mark Twain, it's like Americana.
Whoo!
世界尽头的最高点！
Top of the bottom!
-天啊-真像做梦啊！
Oh, man. -What a dream!
-太棒了-梦想成真
Awesome stuff. -A dream come true.
我的天呐
Oh my God.
真的是美梦成真了
What a dream come true.
多么美好的一天
What a day.
回首往事是非常有趣的
It's interesting looking backwards on things.
尤其是那些没能按照你的预期发展的事情
Especially things that didn't turn out the way you hoped.
来咯！
All right, here it goes!
-Whoo! -Yeah!
Oh!
不管飞机是否交付
Irrespective of whether the plane got delivered, didn't get delivered,
它确实改变了一些事
this did change things.
它把一切变得更好了
And it changed 'em for the better, and I'm proud of that.
而我非常骄傲
这一切都是因为两个人走到了一起
And it's because of two people that got together,
约翰和我 我们在山上结下了友谊
John and myself, who forged a friendship on a mountain.
一段恒久的友谊
A lasting friendship,
我们还期待着更多的冒险
with further adventures to come.
谢谢你 百事可乐
Well, thank you, Pepsi,
发布了充满误导性的虚假广♥告♥
for running misleading and false advertising.
要不是你 我们永远不会来到这里
We never would've been here without you. Whoo!
（陶德成功完成了肿瘤切除手术）
（他现在病情有所缓解正在寻找他的下一次冒险机会）
（约翰已经开始了进一步的冒险）
（其中最重要的便是他的妻小）
（约翰仍然几乎每天都缠着陶德让他支持自己的下一个好主意）
（可口可乐获胜！6比5）
（抱歉 百事可乐！）