赢家先生

- Listen, she's going to calm down and be fine. - What?
你知道吗 我在崎岖坎坷的人生旅途上
Look, one thing I've learned on my journey
学到了一个道理...
down the dusty road of life...
我不想听了
Yeah, no, enough of that now.
我受够了 我要给她打电♥话♥
I've had enough. I'm calling her.
如果她迟疑了
If she's having second thoughts,
我宁可现在就取消婚礼
I'd rather nip this in the bud now.
-好吧 -嗯
- Ah, OK, all right. - Yeah.
珍玛 你看上去美极了
Jemma, you look beautiful.
这打破传统了
This is breaking tradition.
我不得不跟我奶奶摔角才能来见你
I literally had to wrestle my nan to come and meet you.
每五分钟就哭一次
Yeah, well, crying every five minutes is
-也不怎么传统 -我知道
- hardly traditional either, is it? - I know.
我就是感觉很困惑
I just feel so confused.
这可是件大事 万一错了呢
This is a massive thing we're doing, what if it's wrong?
所以你迟疑了 因为我...
What, so you're having second thoughts cos I...
砸烂了一台电视
..smashed a TV and...
问你想不想你在酒吧玩棋盘游戏
..asked if you wanted to play a board game in a pub?
不 不是你
No, it's not you.
是因为我们没法怀孕吗
Is it cos we can't get pregnant?
-我们会怀上的 -不是因为那个 我们太不同了
- Cos we will. - No, it's not that, but, look, we're so different.
你如此乐观 我很愧疚 因为我不是
You're so optimistic and I feel bad because I'm not.
我不明白
I don't understand.
我不能就保持乐观
I can't just hope for the best
对我的人生听之任之
and let things happen to me in life.
一切不总是对的
Everything isn't always all right.
我之前觉得 你一定会出什么乱子
I was convinced you'd get in some sort of calamity
把整个婚礼毁了
and ruin the whole wedding.
但我没有
But I haven't.
那你窗户冒出的那些泡泡是怎么回事
Then, what were all the bubbles coming out of your window?
那是想在按♥摩♥浴缸洗个澡搞砸了
Uh, that was a mistake with the jacuzzi bath.
你搞砸的太多了 莱斯利
There were so many of them, Leslie.
听着 我不是个彻头彻尾的白♥痴♥
Look, I'm not a complete idiot.
我觉得人生不会永远一帆风顺
I don't think everything is going to be fine ALL the time.
-是吗 -对
- Don't you? - No. I mean,
我都睡不着觉
I've hardly slept
想着你要取消这个婚礼
thinking you're going to call off this wedding, to be honest.
我觉得太困惑了
I just feel so confused.
我爱你胜过一切
Well, I love you more than anything.
我最想娶的也是你
And I want to marry you more than anything.
但如果你不这样感觉
But if you don't feel the same way...
那你只需要现在告诉我
..then you just need to tell me now.
不过你做了什么决定 我保证
You know, whatever you decide, I promise...
都绝对没事
..it'll be totally cool.
对不起
I'm so sorry.
我只是担心你会毁了一切
I just got scared that you were going to ruin everything,
现在却被我毁了
and now I have.
不 过来 过来
No, come here, come here.
你还没有 一切都好
You haven't... You haven't ruined anything.
还没开始呢
It's not even started yet.
我知道
I know.
我们别把这个小插曲告诉别人就行了
We just won't tell people about this bit.
我好爱你
I love you so much.
咱们结婚吧
Let's get married.
莱斯利 快来
Leslie, come on.
怎么了 来啊
What is it? Come on.
我做不到
I don't think I can.
我想跟你共度余生 快点
I want to spend my whole life with you, come on.
求你了
Please.
我不行 珍玛
I can't, Jem.
我做不到
I can't.
为什么
Why?
因为我的手指困在城♥堡♥里了
I've got my finger stuck in the castle.
什么
What?
我把手指...
I've got my finger...
困在城♥堡♥里了
..stuck in the castle.
你干了什么
You've what?
我们刚才谈话的时候
Right, while we were talking just then,
我发现了一个洞
I found a hole...
我就把手指塞进去了 我就是好奇
..and I stuck my finger in it - I was just curious, I suppose -and
然后就拔不出来了
I can't get it out.
快拔♥出♥来♥
Get it out.
我试了一阵子了 但现在手指开始肿了
I've been trying a while, but I think it's swelling up.
今天不行 今天绝对不行
Not today. This can't happen today!
-看见没 -我们就差一点了
- See? - We are so close!
来
Here we go.
我付这些钱
I have not paid all this money
可不是为了让你把手指卡在城♥堡♥里
for you to get your finger stuck in a castle.
不不 只是肿得更厉害了
No, no, no, it's just swelling up worse.
这其实不是城♥堡♥ 是都铎门楼
It's not actually a castle, it's a Tudor gatehouse.
-告诉你了 -真的
- Told you. - Really?
不管是什么 他被困住了
Well, whatever it is, he's stuck in it.
我去一趟货车 我们需要点重型工具
I'm going to my van. We need some power tools.
不 不行
No. You can't do that.
没人允许碰这堵墙
No-one can touch this wall
除非有国家遗产高级代表在场
without a senior representative of the National Heritage present.
但他们现在就得结婚
But they need to get married now.
你确实得门吸自问 一堆老石头
I mean, you do have to ask yourself what are old stones
-跟大活人哪个重要 -没错
- compared to living people? - Yes! Yes.
婚姻制度难道不是比任何城♥堡♥都更古老吗
Is not the institution of marriage older than any castle?
-都铎门房♥ -求你了
- Tudor gatehouse. - Please.
我光准备鲜花就付出了好多
I have done a grand on the flowers alone.
我去打给他们 不过今天是周六
I'll go and call them, but it is a Saturday.
有一次我看见一个纪录片
You know, I saw this documentary one time
讲一只狼为了逃脱陷阱 把自己的胳膊咬掉了
about a wolf who chewed off his own arm to escape a trap.
-狼有胳膊吗 -腿
- Do wolves have arms? - Well...legs.
所以你觉得我应该咬掉我的腿 库珀
So your suggestion is I chew off my leg, Coop?
我还没仔细想过
Yeah, I didn't really think about it.
总之 我要去酒吧了
Anyway, I'm off to the bar.
再润色润色我的演讲
I'm going to work on my speech.
说不定把这段加进去
I might add this to it.
你加油吧 大文豪
Yeah, you crack on, mate.
看看已经来多少人了
Look how many people are here already.
我需要去梳理好了
I need to finish getting ready.
一切都会没事的 我一会就脱身了
Everything's going to be fine. I'll be out of here in a minute.
我去加油站要点润滑油
I am going to the petrol station to get some WD-40.
你在这等着 莱斯利
You wait there, Leslie.
好
Yeah.
请问需要什么服务
Hello, what service do you require?
你好 接消防队吧
Um hello. Uh, fire brigade, I think.
正在转接
Transferring.
-你好 消防队 -你好
- Hello, fire brigade. - Oh, hello.
-我把手指卡在城♥堡♥里了 -好的
- I've got my finger stuck in a castle. - OK.
城♥堡♥多大
How big is the castle?
挺大的
Yeah, it's pretty big.
抱歉 我问一句 这很重要吗
Sorry, I wouldn't like to guess. Is it important?
你能自己去急诊室吗
Could you make your way to A&E?
不能
No.
没人能开车送你吗 能打车吗
Do you have no-one to drive you? Could you get a taxi?
抱歉 我觉得你没明白
Right, sorry, I don't think you understand -
我把手指塞进一个城♥堡♥了
I've got my finger stuck in a castle.
玩具城♥堡♥
A toy castle?
不 真正的城♥堡♥
No, a real castle.
墙上有个洞
There's a hole in a wall,
我把手指塞进去 拔不出来了
I stuck my finger in and I can't get it out.
抱歉 这是紧急情况吗
Sorry, is this an emergency?
对 今天我结婚
Yeah. It's my wedding day.
你困在哪个城♥堡♥了
So which castle are you stuck in, please?
巴姆沃斯城♥堡♥
It's Bamworth Castle.
哦 那个都铎门楼
Oh, yes, the Tudor gatehouse.
请别挂断