哈莉·奎茵

拜托 你总是说你想 “到池子的另一端”
Come on. You're always sayin' ya wanna go across the pond.
我指的是欧洲
I meant Europe.
我不知道 你知道吗
I don't know. You know?
你觉得呢 猫女 - 你给我去
Wh... What do you think, Catwoman? - Ugh. You're going.
拜托...
Please, please, please...
好吧
Fine.
哥谭市最棒 最让人“性”奋 跟兴奋的情侣要去大苹果了
Gotham City's Best-est, Most Titillating-est, Most Exciting-est Couple are going to the Big Apple!
是大杏桃 - 我们要去大杏桃了
It's the Big Apricot. - We're going to the Big Apricot!
天啊 已经过太久了 我都忘记穿洋装是什么感觉了
Man, it's been so long, I forgot what it feels like to wear a dress.
但终于又穿上内♥裤♥的感觉很棒吧
But isn't it great to finally wear underwear again?
我不知道算不算“很棒” 但...
I don't know about great, but, um...
看看大家 他们都面带笑容 没有人在打架
Look at everyone. They're, like, smiling. No one's fighting.
怎么会有人过这种生活
How do people live like this?
真不敢相信这里的人闻起来都这么香
I can't believe how good everyone smells here.
在哥谭市 连最漂亮的人闻起来都有尿骚味
In Gotham, even the prettiest people smell like piss.
天啊 他们真的是全力以赴呢
Wow, they really just kinda went all out.
这边有那种“新博物馆”的味道
It's got that "new museum" smell.
只要我能得到超人的那声“谢谢” 那味道就能维持下去
And it'll stay this way, as long as I get that "thank you" from Superman.
抱歉 你最后说了什么
I'm sorry, what was that last thing?
我刚刚说 如果 他不为我救他一命说“谢谢”
Oh, I just said that, if he doesn't say "thank you" for saving his life,
我就会发疯 拿球棒打爆一切
I'm gonna lose my goddamn mind and take a bat to everything!
拜托别告诉我
Please don't tell me
你要让超人的特别之夜 变成以你为焦点
you're making Superman's special night all about you?
没有 但是 你知道的 我...
Oh, no! But, you know, I--
但是什么 - 香槟
But? - Ooh, bubbles!
不好意思 你是怎么 把水里的块状物弄出来的
Uh, excuse me. How do you get all the chunks out of the water?
水里的块状物 天啊 难道我们是在哥谭市吗
Chunks in the water? Oh, dear. Where are we, Gotham City?
敬生命
L'Chaim.
你们这里会资源回收
Oh, you guys recycle here?
嘿 宝贝
Hey, baby?
能看着我一下吗
Look at me for a second?
我觉得我们今晚还是好好独处就好
Um, I feel like we should just stick to ourselves tonight.
因为我们在这里谁都不认识
Just 'cause we don't really know anyone here.
布鲁斯 - 我一闻到那股
Bruce! - I knew it was
甜美的哥谭市尿骚味就知道是你来了
you the moment I smelled that sweet Gotham piss.
你是来这里出“扁福”任务的吗
Are ya here for a B-A-T thing?
最近我更专注在真正重要的事上
These days I'm focusing more on what really matters.
我的家族...
My family...
生意
business.
我决定在这里盖栋新的韦恩企业塔
I decided to build the new Wayne Enterprises Tower here,
因为上一栋被月球激光毁了之类的
after the last one was destroyed by a moon laser.
我能看出我让你们觉得很无聊
Yada-yada. I can see I'm boring you.
我来这里的真正原因 是为了支持我的女友 莉娜
The real reason I'm here is to support my girlfriend, Lena.
她总是很忙碌 终于能一起出来玩一晚的感觉很好
She's always so busy. It's nice to finally have a night out together.
你们好
Well, hello there!
你看起来真是优雅有气质
Ya look so sophisticated.
而且年龄也很适当 - 你是想讨个奖牌吗 大哥
And age-appropriate. - You want a medal, champ?
给布鲁斯来点应得的教训
Giving Brucie proper comeuppance.
小心 别对他太颐指气使 不然他会爱上你的
Careful, don't boss him around too much, or else he'll fall for you.
他喜欢叫我玛莎
He likes to call me Martha.
她在开玩笑 绝对是在开玩笑
She's joking. Uh, definitely joking...
能认识一些布鲁斯的朋友真的很棒
It's so wonderful to meet some of Brucie's friends.
我都开始觉得 这个爱生气的家伙没有朋友呢
I was beginning to think this ol' grumpy Gus didn't have any.
我没有爱生气 我是克制感情
I'm not grumpy. I'm stoic.
你有爱生气 还有不要在别人面前纠正我
You're grumpy. And don't correct me in front of people.
对 当然了
Yes, right, of course.
不好意思 各位
Excuse me, everyone.
她真的有整脖子
Oh, she did get her neck done.
在我们见到今天的主角
Before we see the man of the hour,
或者我应该说 在见到有“钢铁之躯”的主角之前
or should I say, the Man of Steel of the hour...
我能赢得普利策奖 但连个笑声都得不到
Hmm, I can win a Pulitzer Prize, but I can't get a laugh.
我想欢迎今晚的赞助人 大都会市的女王蜂
I'd like to welcome tonight's benefactor, the queen bee of Metropolis
她成就了这间博物馆 莉娜路瑟
who made this museum possible. Lena Luthor!
莉娜路瑟 - 天啊 那是雷克斯的妹妹
Lena Luthor? - Holy shit, that is Lex's sister.
谢谢 谢谢大家 你们太客气了
Thank you. Oh, thank you, all. You are too kind.
现在你们可能在想
Now, you're probably thinking,
“天啊 一个路瑟家的人 资助超人博物馆是不是很讽刺 ”
"Gee. Isn't it ironic for a Luthor to fund a Superman museum?"
但我向你们保证 我跟家兄不同 我有一头浓密的头发
But I assure you, I am not my brother. I have a full head of hair.
有点太明显 但是事实
A little obvious, but sure.
我们为各位俊男美女 准备了一个美好的夜晚
We have a wonderful night for you beautiful people.
包括超人马戏团的特技表演
Including a performance by the Cirque du Supes acrobatics,
紧接着 我们要揭晓 我们最宝贵的收藏品
followed by the unveiling of the crown jewel of our collection,
超人史上最珍贵的文物
the most cherished artifact in Superman history.
你觉得那文物是什么
What do ya think the artifact is?
希望不是超狗小氪的骨灰
I hope it's not the ashes of Krypto the Superdog.
我听说它咬了闪电侠 所以 他们不得不...你懂的
I heard he bit the Flash and they had to... You know.
不...那只杂种狗在这里 你看...
No, no, the mutt's here. Look, look, look.
嘿 超人...
Hey, Supes! Supes! Sup-er-man! Supes!
他可能没看到我
He probably didn't see me.
那家伙能透视墙壁 他是在冷落你 宝贝
The dude sees through walls. That's a snub, babe.
什么 烂透了 我刮腋毛可不是为了被冷落
Wha-- Screw that! I didn't shave my pits to get snubbed.
救命... - 我来救你了 吉米
Help! Help! - I'll save you, Jimmy!
没事了 我的领结卡在这扇自动门里
Oh, never mind. Got my bowtie jammed in this here automatic door
差点把我勒到窒息
and the pressure was choking me to death.
幸好其中一个新奇的 机器人哨兵救了我
Thankfully, one of these new-fangled Automaton Sentries freed me
还给了我一颗巧克力薄荷糖 看来我不需要你的帮忙 超人先生
and gave me a chocolate-mint. Guess I don't need ya, Mr. Superman, sir.
天啊 那真是太好了 你不需要我 吉米 太好了
Oh, wow. That's, uh, that's so great you don't need me, Jimmy. So great.
超人 我要你说“谢谢”
Supes, I want that "thank you!"
扫描中
Scanning.
我可以把薄荷糖吐出来
I could spit the mint out.
你们两个没有入场券 哥谭市民不属于这里
You two don't have tickets for entry. Gothamites don't belong here.
你知道吗 管那些自命不凡的贱...
You know, screw those hoity-toity cun--
我的天啊 这张床垫
Oh, my God. This mattress.
我现在相信有上帝了
I believe in God now.
我们可以把它带到酒店 然后看“晚间八卦秀”
Can we bring it to the hotel and just watch Nite Goss,
叫客房♥服务 待在房♥里 然后...
order room service, stay in, and just--
不行 我们每次都那么做
No! That's what we always do.
我们不能让那些雅痞赢 好吗
I mean, ugh. We can't let those yuppies win, okay?
他们想毁了我们的夜晚 我们要毁了他们的夜晚
They wanna ruin our night, we will ruin theirs.
我们要闯进博物馆 偷走他们珍贵的狗屁东西
We are breakin' into that museum and stealin' their prized bullshit thingy!
好 我们会的 先让我小睡一下
Um, okay. We will do that, right after this quick nap.
我不知道我和查理要怎么撑过去
I don't know how Charlie and I will get through this.
知道我们做♥爱♥的时候 他满脑子想的都是那些大触手
How can I go on, knowing he's thinking about those big tentacles
我该怎么继续下去
the whole time we are making love?
那个是相当正常的性癖
It's a perfectly normal fetish.
你喜欢触手
You're into tentacles?
我想的是你的藤蔓
I was thinkin' about your vines.
好吧
All right.
该死 我们需要有其他上去的办法
Oh, shit. We need another way up there.
如果我们能在不引起骚动的情况下 用那些空中丝带荡来荡去就好了
Ugh, if only we could swing around on those aerial silks without causin' a scene.
嘿 搞什么...
Hey! What the hell is--
我们不是付钱请你们来发呆的
We're not paying you to stand around.
我们是付钱 请你们用那些空中丝带荡来荡去的
We're paying you to swing around on those aerial silks.
那不怎么精彩
That didn't look great.
我以为会有警报器之类的 这座城市真懒惰
Thought there'd be an alarm or somethin'. This city's lazy.
嘿 那是超人吗 正在悲伤地吃着饼干
Hey, is that Superman? Sadly eating cookies?
今天一定是他的放纵日
Must be his cheat day.
放下文物
Drop the artifact.
你说了算
If you say so.
杀了那些有尿骚味的人类
Kill the piss-smelling humans.
去你的 流汗象征身体健康
Oh, fuck off! Sweating is the sign of a healthy body! Ha!
这间该死的博物馆里没有绿色植物
There's no greenery in this damn museum!
幸好我每次出门都会带点心
Luckily, I never leave home without a snack.
该死
Ah, shit.
毒藤女
Ivy!
好身手 - 对 很性感吧
Nice move. - Yeah, that was hot, wasn't it?
哈莉 在你右边
Harley, on your right!
我应该帮忙
I should help.
你能做什么 布鲁斯 让她们好好玩吧
What are you gonna do, Brucie? Let 'em have their fun.
(“超人日记”)
(仿制氪石)