叫我凯特（2021）

Do you think we're the oldest people in here?
到目前为止是的
By far.
他们都想着喝酒
They're all thinking about drinking
一起跳舞
and rolling around with each other.
但你知道我在想什么吗
But you know what I'm thinking about?
别说出来 菲尔
Don't say it, Phil.
睡觉
Sleeping.
这下你让我想起弗兰克了
Now you got me thinking about Frank.
弗兰克是谁
Who's Frank?
弗兰克是我的抱枕
Frank is my body pillow.
他是记忆海绵做的
He's made of memory foam
他记住了我身体的每一寸
and he has memorized every inch of my body.
你和弗兰克碰巧是开放式关系吗
By chance, uh, do you and Frank have an open relationship?
我都不知所措了
I'm, like, freaking out right now,
你太可爱了
you're so cute.
你愿意来跟我还有我朋友一起跳舞吗
Um, will you come dance with me and my friends?
我这个小妖精 本质就是只熊玩偶啊
Damn me and my teddy bear nature.
天啊 跳上来
Oh, my gosh. Get on my back.
跑吧 姑娘
Giddyap, girl.
各位 我背着他了
You guys, I got him!
我不累
Oh, I'm not tired.
真的不累
I'm not tired.
只是有点累
Just like a little tired.
我站着睡着了 像马一样
I fell asleep standing up, like a horse.
我该做点运动 血液循环一下
Do some exercises, get my blood pumping.
活动肩膀
Couple shoulder rolls.
扭扭腰
Twists.
有人倒下了
Man down, man down.
很抱歉
I am so sorry.
好吧 现在我踩到你的脚了
Okay, now I stepped on your foot.
弗兰克就不会让这种事发生
Frank never would've let this happen.
对不起 你没事吧
I'm so sorry. Are you okay?
你正好打中了我的纽扣
You hit me right in the button.
作为道歉 来
Uh, by way of apology, here.
伸手进来 随便抓个东西
Uh, reach in, grab whatever you want.
里面有很多薄荷糖
There's-there's a lot of peppermints in there.
还有一些有趣的发夹
There-There's some fun hair clips.
好吧 我喜欢发夹
Okay. I like hair clips.
你抓到了我的钥匙
Hey, you got my keys.
应该是我的钥匙
I think you mean my keys.
这样的话 我喜欢你的路易维尔大学钥匙扣
Well, in that case, I like your U of L keychain.
我以前也有个一样的
I used to have one just like it.
-你上的那所大学吗 -是啊
- Oh, did you go there? - Yeah.
-我也是 -不是吹嘘
- Oh, me, too. - Not to brag,
但我也许是他们最铁杆的篮球粉丝
but I'm probably their hugest basketball fan.
既然我们都没吹嘘
Well, since we're both not bragging,
我念书时是球队吉祥物
when I was a student, I was the mascot.
不是吧
Shut your face.
你是红雀路易吗
You were Louie the Cardinal?
尽情吹嘘吧 好心的先生
Uh, brag on, kind sir.
如您所愿 女士 十年前
As you wish, milady. Remember, like, ten years ago,
中场休息时 吉祥物从半场线起跑
at halftime, when the mascot took off at the half-court line,
跳上蹦床 误判了篮圈的位置
jumped on the trampoline, misjudged the hoop,
头撞到了篮板上
hit his head on the backboard...
然后大家用担架将他抬了出去
And then he had to be carried out on a stretcher
大家唱着 路易 路易
and everybody chanted, "Louie! Louie!"
-那就是我 -天啊
- That was me. - Oh, my God!
你简直是名人
You're like a celebrity.
其实我在大一那年
You know, I actually auditioned
去参加了吉祥物的面试
to be the mascot my freshman year.
真的吗 哪一年
Oh, really? When was that?
199...
Uh, nineteen-ninety...
我请你喝一杯吧
let me buy you drink.
我怎么突然就不愿承认自己的年龄了
Why am I suddenly not admitting my age?
也许我真成了我妈那样
Maybe I am becoming my mother.
我连你今年多大都不知道真的很奇怪 妈
It is weird that I don't know how old you are, Mother.
我比幼苗年长 但比月亮年轻
I'm older than a seedling but younger than the Moon.
我比橡树强壮
I'm stronger than an oak
-如风般轻盈 -风般轻盈
- and flexible like the wind. - Flexible like the wind.
抱歉 我就不该提这一嘴
Sorry I brought it up.
坐稳了 老爷爷
Well, saddle up, Grandpa.
等等 我也要骑
Wait, wait, I'm getting on, too.
兰迪 菲尔
Randi? Phil?
不好意思 先生
Excuse me, sir.
我在找我朋友
Looking for my friends.
不行 兰迪 不可以
No, no. Randi, no.
跳起来 姑娘们
Let's go, girls...
总算有首我听过的歌♥了
Finally, a song I know.
先生 有规定说不能在吧台上跳舞吗
Sir, are there rules about dancing on the bar here?
这样算回答了你的问题吗
Does this answer your question?
今晚我状态爆棚 我要出去玩个痛快
I'm goin' out tonight, I'm feelin' all right...
还好我在家里的厨房♥柜台上练过这首歌♥
I'm so glad I've practiced this on my kitchen counter at home.
菲尔 快看 我赚钱了
Phil, look, I'm making money!
我没事 我没事
I'm okay. I'm okay.
嗨起来吧
Let's party.
不敢相信我们去错了酒吧
I can't believe we've been at the wrong club.
波蒂是在熊牛酒吧
Birdie's at The Bear and The Bull,
不是牛熊酒吧
not The Bull and The Bear.
菲尔 看到你从牛背上飞下来
Phil, you scared me to death when I saw you
把我吓个半死
go flying off that bull.
我还以为你要翘辫子了
I thought you were gonna die.
怎么可能 妈妈常常教导我
Not a chance. Mama always taught me
不管我从任何高度坠落 放软身子就行
that if I fell from any height, just go limp.
这样我就不会伤筋动骨
That way, I wouldn't break anything.
兰迪 你也吓着我了
Randi, you scared me, too.
我不想说三道四
I mean, I don't want to judge,
那是老人的习惯
'cause that would be an old people thing,
我就抱着年轻好奇的心态问好了
so I'll just keep it young and curious.
你跳舞的时候在那个男的身上磨蹭
What were you doing rubbing up against that guy
是怎么回事
on the dance floor?
你有男朋友的啊
You have a boyfriend.
再说一次 我是以年轻 酷炫
Again, I'm just asking in a young, cool,
交互动画片里的那种方式问的
Blue's Clues kind of way.
年轻人参加派对发生这种事
Hey, those are the type of things that go down
再正常不过了好吗
when young people party.
你意思是你接受不了吗
Are you saying that you can't handle it?
你开玩笑呢
Wh-- Are you kidding me?
我跟赤♥裸♥上身的酒保热舞了呢 还赚了23块钱
I was dancing with a topless bartender and I made 23 bucks.
我把钱都给了他
Which I then gave him
因为我不小心踩碎了他的柑橘榨汁机
'cause I accidentally crushed his citrus squeezer.
不知为何 我的蛋蛋在隐隐作痛
I don't know why, but that makes my nuts hurt.
我还打了一个人 我们聊得特别开心
Ooh, I also punched a guy and we had an awesome conversation.
我们在同一个月出生
We have birthdays in the same month,
只不过我要满40了 他才满30
although I'll be turning 40 and he'll be turning 30.
少来 你不必有这种烦恼
Ooh, yeah, no, you don't need that hassle.
男人至死是少年 29岁的汉子
Guys mature way later, so a 29-year-old dude
就跟19岁的小屁孩一样
is really like a 19-year-old boy.
有意思 兰迪
Oh, well, that's interesting, Randi.
你可以评价我跟别人的关系
So you can comment on my relationship,
我就不能说你的
but I can't comment on yours?
这么说你还跟他谈上恋爱了
Oh, so now it's a relationship?
不是 等等 等等
No. Wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait.
-停车停车 -不会吧 你要吐了吗
- Stop the car! Stop the car! - Oh, no. Are you gonna yak?
我这件衣服只能干洗
'Cause this outfit is dry-clean only.
不是的 你看
No, look.
那就是我也许可能会
That's the cemetery where I may or may not
永世定居的墓地
take up permanent residence for all eternity.
你们想去看看我的新住处吗
You want to check out my new digs?
懂吗 住处[挖掘]fsGet it? Digs?
我听懂了
I do get it.
挖
Digs.