僵尸情人节（2017）

I can stand a lot, but that was just too much.
男人 有时男孩子也是 他们会做很坏的事
Men and sometimes boys do evil deeds.
真♥相♥了
Ain't that the truth.
啊 好吧 我们现在知道的是
Ah, okay, well, what we learned is, uh,
这些家伙是海外来的黑帮分子
these guys are imported gangsters.
他们移♥民♥到这里
They immigrated here
从芝加哥进入到美国
to the good old USA via Chicago.
他们也和芝加哥黑帮有牵连
And, uh, they got involved with the Chicago mob
他们把这些家伙送来这里
and they sent them out here
开辟新的领域
to kind of open up new territory.
麦克斯 这些家伙是冷血杀手
Max, these guys are ice cold killers.
是的 如果你要去对付他们的话
Yeah, so if you're gonna take them on,
别拿刀去和他们枪战
make sure you don't try bringing a knife to a gun fight.
麦克斯 你还有枪吗？
Max, you do still own a gun?
不到真正有需要的时刻
No one really needs a gun
谁会把枪留着
until he really needs a gun.
嘿 麦克斯
Hi, Max.
我以前做过坏事
I've done things,
我不为之自豪的一些事情
things I'm not proud of.
我知道
I know.
但是当我和你在一起的时候
But when I'm with you,
我丝毫不怀念过去的一点一滴
all those memories are wiped clean.
你到底想对我说什么 麦克斯？
What exactly are you trying to say to me, Max?
我是说我想和你在一起
I'm saying I wanna be with you
永远一起
all the time.
那你就说出来吧
So then ask me.
麦克斯 问我
Max, ask me.
莎拉
Sara...
莎拉 你愿意嫁给我吗？
Sara, will you marry me?
我愿意
Yes.
我愿意
Yes.
我愿意 麦克斯
Yes, Max,
我愿意嫁给你
I will marry you.
你让我成为了世界上最幸福的女孩
You have just made me the happiest girl in World.
你做了正确的选择 你知道吗？
You made the right choice, you know?
我知道
Oh, I know.
我也做了正确的选择
I made the right choice, too.
我太震惊了 我……
I'm just so stunned. I, um...
-我什么时候能见你？ -几个小时以后吧
- When can I see you? - A few hours.
我会准备好的
I'll be ready.
稳住 伙计
Buck up, bucko.
又不是没见过大场面
It's not your first rodeo.
-快点 我们走这条路 -不 不 我不能再走了
- Hurry, we'll go this way. - No, no I can't go anymore.
来吧 快点
Come on, all the way.
杰...杰西卡？
Jess-- Jessica?
杰西卡
Jessica!
杰西卡
Jessica!
杰西卡
Jessica!
杰西卡
Jessica!
哇 我从没想过我会再见到你
Wow, I never thought I'd see you again.
我以为你已经退休了 詹姆斯
I thought you were out of the game, James.
-谁是詹姆斯？ -我叫谁都是詹姆斯
- Who's James? - Ah, I call everybody James.
你不喜欢詹姆斯？那我叫你琼斯
You don't like James? I'll call you Jones.
-我都不介意 -那就叫詹姆斯吧
- Makes no never mind to me. - James will do.
让我猜猜
Ah, let me guess.
有人抛弃背叛你了 不是吗？
Somebody's gone and done you wrong, haven't they?
是的 你可以这么说
Oh yeah, you could say that.
让我再猜一遍
And let me guess again.
这些小屁孩不知道他们惹了谁吧？
These boys don't know they got a tiger by the tail, do they?
是的 你可能看起来天真无辜
Yeah, you probably acted all innocent like,
让他们以为把你抓得牢牢的
they thought they was playing you,
但其实是你在掌控大局
when all the while, you were playing them.
我是说对了还是对了？
Am I right or am I right?
你吸多了？
Must be all the drugs you're taking.
你还是很风趣 伙计
You still funny, man.
他们不知道你有“焦土政策”和
Yeah, they don't know you got a scorched earth,
毫不妥协的原则吧？
take no prisoners policy, do they?
都是尘封往事了
Maybe that was me in a past life.
你是真滴有意思
Hah, you are still funny.
不过我可不信什么轮回
Yeah, but I'm not in that reincarnation game.
毒品就是我的人生 你猜的没错
Drugs, you got that right,
但我可不奢求转世
but no reincarnation for me.
我活一次就足够了
I got one life to live,
我要痛快地活一场 然后直接下地狱
I'm gonna live it well and straight to hell.
好吧 让我们开始谈正事吧 詹姆斯
Well, let's get down to business James.
你还记得怎么用这些吗？
You remember how to use one of these?
-抽开 瞄准 射击 -嗯
- Pump, point, shoot. - Mm-hmm.
那个玩意儿会有八个弹壳
That baby'll hold eight shells,
你可能没有时间装弹
and you probably won't have time to reload
喷雾模式覆盖的范围足够广
spray pattern should be large enough,
就算你老了瞄不准了
so poor aim from being rusty and all
应该也不会有太大影响
shouldn't be too much of a hindrance for you.
我小时候玩过气♥枪♥ 有什么帮助没有？
I had a BB gun as a boy. Does that count?
你是问当过男孩还是玩过气♥枪♥？
Being a boy or having a BB gun?
詹姆斯 你忘了我们的辉煌历史了？
Shoot, James, you forget we have got history.
见鬼 我知道你可以用胶带和衣架
Hell, I know you could probably make a tactical pump
就做出一个战术气♥枪♥
out of duct tape and a coat hanger.
不过你想装作不记得也行吧
Ah, but I'll play along with you.
跟我没关系
Makes no never mind to me.
话说你要带气♥枪♥上去也没关系
Well, BB gun is all right.
但它只能给对手留下一点伤痕
But it just leaves a little red welt.
然而 你现在手上这玩意 它能在犀牛的屁♥股♥上再给它开一个洞
Well, now that baby, that'll put a second hole and a rhino's ass.
如果说你就这么挂了
Well, if you don't make it out alive,
你要知道人终有一死哈
take comfort in knowing that all roads lead
早死晚死都是一样的
to the same destination.
-好吧 这真让人欣慰 -那是
- Well, that's real comforting. - Ah,
其实我也说不好所有事情的结局
I don't know where all roads lead, man,
尤其是你的结局
especially your roads.
我刚刚说那番转世投胎的屁话
I was just spoutin' that reincarnation crap
是因为我以为你会感兴趣的
'cause I thought you'd dig it.
琼斯 我觉得
Jones, I'm getting the feelin'
你好像丢掉了你应有的幽默感噢
you're losin' your sense of humor.
可能吧
You may be right.
-多少钱？ -你开价吧
- How much? - Well, go ahead, make my night.
很久没干这行了 我都不知道收费标准了
It's been a long time. I don't have a clue what you charge me.
那我可喜欢这句话了
Well, that's music to my ears, Jones,
可喜欢了
music to my ears.
为什么是爱达荷州？为什么是那？
Why Idaho? Why Idaho?
在那里人可以自♥由♥生活
Man can live free.
自己狩猎和捕鱼来吃
Hunt and fish for his own food,
有足够的空间可以漫游 有充足的新鲜空气可以呼吸
plenty of space to roam, plenty of fresh air to breathe
而且你可以在那里感受四季
and you get four seasons.
简直是自♥由♥之子的天堂
It's a free man's country.
-那里下雪吗？ -当然 下雪了
- Does it snow there? - Sure, it snows.
我不喜欢下雪
I'm not big on snow.
雪啊雪
Schnow-schmow.
爱达荷州 真的是天堂
Idaho, it's God's country.
麦克斯 看看这个世界发生了什么
Look what's happenin' to this world, Max.
你看看这个国家正在发生的事情
Look what's happening in this country.
我不认为那些话只是谣言
I don't think they're just rumors.
事态变得越来越严重了
Things are plum crazy.
只是灰尘罢了 换一下你的过滤器就没事了
Just dust. Change your filter, you'll be fine.
-我会去看你 -你要是来了
- I'll visit you. - You do that,
我就给你做你这辈子能吃到的最好吃的一顿饭
I'll cook you the best meal you've ever had,
让你喝最纯净的水
cleanest water you've ever tasted,
还有呼吸最新鲜的空气
and the freshest air you've ever breathed.
我们今天看到的太阳
You know, we see the same sun
和罗马角斗士看到的是同一个
as the Roman gladiators did.
这多么不可思议啊
That's an amazing thing.
确实呢
It is at that.
好了 我最好现在就走人