另一个佐伊（2023）

在公元前270年的罗马 没有人想参军 对吧
So in 270 A.D. in Rome, nobody was joining the army, right?
因为没有人想离开他们的妻子
Because no one wanted to leave their wives.
皇帝就这样说 "这不可能"
And the emperor was like, "That's not happening."
于是他禁止所有婚姻
And he banned all marriages.
但圣瓦伦丁就说 "这不公平"
But St. Valentine was like, "That's not fair,"
所以他就秘密地为新婚夫妇主持婚礼
so he married couples in secret.
皇帝便逮捕了瓦伦丁判处他死刑
The emperor arrested Valentine and sentenced him to death,
但他爱上了监狱守卫的盲人女儿
but he fell in love with the prison guard's blind daughter.
一天晚上 瓦伦丁找到她
One night, St. Valentine reached out
抚摸着盲人女孩的眼睛
and touched the eyes of the blind girl,
到了早上 她有生以来第一次能看到
and in the morning, she could see for the very first time.
那一天的日期
The date?
就是2月14日
February 14th.
剩下的部分 如他们所说 是历史
And the rest, as they say, is history.
谢谢你 贝卡 刚才非常有趣
Thank you, Becca. That was interesting.
不是吧
Come on.
佐伊 你有什么需要补充的吗
Zoey, do you have something you'd like to add?
只是这个故事并不准确
Just that story's not really accurate.
你说什么 -首先 在公元前三世纪
Excuse me? - First of all, there were several
有很多饱受折磨的圣瓦伦丁
St. Valentines who were martyred in the third century
其次 他们当中没有一个治愈了女孩的眼盲
and... and second of all, none of them cured a girl's blindness.
那从未发生
That didn't happen.
好吧 这是可能发生的
Okay, well, it could have happened.
拜托 今天是情人节
Come on, it's Valentine's Day.
很有品牌感
It felt on brand.
是啊 没错 那是因为...
Yeah, exactly, 'cause...
因为情节人就是关于一些狗屁
'cause Valentine's Day, it's kind of about bullshit.
好了 佐伊 你想详细说明吗
Okay, Zoey, do you wanna elaborate?
只是恋爱的整个概念
It's just the whole concept of falling in love
什么浪漫的爱情 只不过是资本主义的产物而已
and even romantic love, it's just a product of capitalism.
哇哦 打住 佐伊
Whoa, hold up, Zoey.
所以你完全不相信浪漫的爱情吗
So you don't believe in romantic love at all?
如果那基于兼容性的话
If it's based on compatibility.
我只是认为那很难找到
I just think that's really hard to find,
这也是我创建这个应用程序的原因
which is actually why I created my own app.
那肯定会失败 -玉石俱焚
That's gonna fail. - Crash and burn.
它根据数据驱动的兼容性报告匹配人们
It matches people based on a data-driven compatibility report
因为人都是善变的
because people are really fickle.
但算法是智能的
But algorithms are smart.
超过一半的婚姻最终会以离婚收场
Over 50% of marriages end in divorce,
对某些人 他们认为这是个问题
and some people, they see that as a problem.
但我看到其中的潜力 作为未来的收入来源
But I... I see that as potential, like a future revenue stream.
好了 时间到 就这样同学们
Okay, time's up. That's it, people.
下周三...
Next Wednesday...
一家美国众筹平台，允许个人和组织为各种目的筹集资金
如慈善事业、医疗费用、教育费用等
如果你们想投资 就上请帮助我
If you want to invest, just go to GoFundMe.
非常感谢
Yes. Thank you.
或者你也可以扫描这个二维码...投资我
Or you can just scan this QR code to... to invest.
我怀着一颗金子般的心向你奔来
♪ I'm coming at you with a heart of gold
我就是那珍贵的金子
♪ That precious gold is all me
我带着沙漠玫瑰向你奔来
♪ I'm coming at you like a desert rose
他们都能和我一起摇滚
♪ They both can roll with me
嘿 艾丽
Hey, Elle.
嘿 我给你买♥♥了一杯玫瑰抹茶拿铁
Hey! I got you a rose-infused matcha latte.
谢谢 -情人节快乐
Aww. Thank you. - Happy Valentine's Day.
我们就不能取消情人节吗
Can we just cancel Valentine's Day already?
不 今晚不行
Nope, not tonight.
我们要看一部浪漫喜剧
We're doing a rom-com triple header.
不不不 不要啊
No. No. Uh-uh. No. No way. Not again.
放心 这只是一个醉酒和大吃零食的借口
Relax, it's just an excuse to get drunk and gorge on snacks.
好吧 如果你这么说的话
Well, okay, when you put it that way.
你在写另一首诗吗
Are you writing another poem?
你想让我读吗
Do you want me to read it?
上次你读我的诗歌♥的时候 你纠正了我的标点符号♥
Last time you read my poetry, you corrected me on my punctuation.
没有句号♥和逗号♥
It's just the absence of periods and commas
会让我非常紧张
makes me very nervous.
诗歌♥就是那样的
That's kind of how poems work.
课上得怎么样
How was class?
呃 我推销了我的应用程序
Uh, I pitched my app.
在历史课上吗 你吃了豹子胆了
In history class? Bold move.
结果怎么样
How'd it go?
我不知道 我要去看一下请帮助我
I don't know, I think I just have to check GoFundMe.
嘿 佐伊·米勒
Hey! Zoey Miller?
刚刚那是什么
What the hell was that?
喔 礼貌一点 贝卡
Oh, slow your roll there, Becca.
就因为她喜欢情人节你羞辱了她
You shamed her just because she likes Valentine's Day.
你确定这是唯一的原因吗
Are you sure that's the only reason?
你的话让我很难过
What you said made me feel bad.
贝卡 对不起 我并非针对你个人
Becca, I'm sorry, it wasn't meant to be personal.
别忘记在你简历上的技术宅旁边加上愤青
Just make sure you add cynic next to tech geek on your résumé.
怪人 -废物
Weirdo. - Loser.
该死
Ah! Shit.
抱歉 抱歉 抱歉
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
嘿嘿 我非常抱歉 都是我的不好 你没事吧
Hey, hey. I'm sorry. That was fully my fault. Are you okay?
应该吧 我想
Uh, I guess, yeah.
你知道学校里有足球场的 对吧
You know that this school has a soccer field, right?
那可能会留下印记
Okay, that may leave a mark.
你想让我带你去医疗中心之类的吗
Do you want me to take you to the health center or something?
不用 我没事
Nope. Nope, I'm good.
好吧
Okay.
真的非常抱歉
Very sorry about that, so...
扎克 来啊
Zach, come on!
好吧
Okay.
抱歉 -拜
Sorry. - Bye.
好了 各位 我们走吧
All right, guys. Let's go.
你刚才被扎克·麦克拉伦的球砸到脸上
You just had Zach Maclaren's ball in your face.
拜托 这次要小心一点
Come on, keep the balls in play this time.
谁
Who?
扎克·麦克拉伦 足球明星
Zach Maclaren, the soccer star?
呃 他的绩点是多少
Mm, what's his GPA?
9.9分
Hella-fine-point-nine.
他刚才完全就是在和你调情
And he was totally flirting with you.
我确定他和我的兼容性肯定为零
I'm sure that he and I would have, like, a zero compatibility score.
好吧 他的腹肌应该能加分吧
Well, his abs should contribute to that number.
对了 我给你的应用程序捐赠了
And by the way, I donated to your app.
所以今晚你请我喝酒
So you're buying booze tonight.
好吧 成交
Okay, deal.
等你第一次上市的时候再报答我
Pay me back when you get your first IPO.
给我承包一座岛
Buy me an island.
我会给我们买♥♥两座岛 一座用来谈生意一座用来娱乐
I'll buy us two islands, one for business and one for pleasure.
在M-X-N网格中填入非负数
So with this M-X-N grid filled with non-negative numbers,
在其路径的所有数字当中
we can find the path that minimizes the sum
我们可以找到使总和最小的路径
of all numbers along its path.
可恶 -我觉得这能行
Crap. - I think that works.
可恶 我们迟到了
Crap. We're late.
各位 注意时间 你们...走吧
Guys, the time. What are you... come on.
喔 -讲座
Oh. - The lecture.
记住 当你选择研究生院时
Remember, when you pick a graduate school,
一种密♥码♥学概念
指一个证明者可以在不泄露任何有关证明内容的信息的情况下
向验证者证明某个陈述是真实的
不仅仅是人工智能和零知识证明
it's more than just about AI and zero-knowledge proofs.
也在于找到那个你喜欢的
It's also about finding people you like
和你一起开怀大笑的人
and that you can laugh with
因为一个人在图书馆的时间是有限的
because one can only spend so many hours in a library.
下一个问题
Next question.
呃 您认为自己最大的成就是什么
Um, what do you consider your greatest accomplishment?
由美国计算机协会（ACM）于1966年设立的计算机奖项
名称取自艾伦·麦席森·图灵（Alan M. Turing）
旨在奖励对计算机事业作出重要贡献的个人
我必须得说是赢得图灵奖
I have to say winning the Turing Award
还有和我的伴侣抚养两个孩子
and raising my two children with my partner.
我们还有时间再回答一个问题
We have time for one more.