实习大叔（2013）

- What about the app? - This is bigger than an app.
好了 顺便说一下
Okay, and by the way,
我们可以用那个照片互换的想法作为备用
we do have something pretty terrific in our back pocket with that Exchangeagram.
-别提那个了 -噢 我们手里有四张王牌
- Just let it marinate. - Oh, we're holding four aces.
你机会面前你千万别说不
Stop saying no before you give it a chance.
嗯 是的 有道理 我们走吧
Oh, yeah, that's a winner. Here we go.
-让我们尽情地嗨到天亮 -走吧
- Time to light it up forever and never go to sleep. - Let's go.
我们能谈谈关于"网上和线上"的事情吗
Can we talk about this "online, on the line" thing?
好吗 我们真要跟着这俩傻瓜去
Please? We're gonna follow the morons?
好的 谢谢
Oh, xie xie!
我的朋友说在街边有个夜♥总♥会♥
My friend here says there's a dance club down the street
应该是很不错的
that's supposed to be great.
-你在跟我开玩笑吧 -没有 我没有跟你开玩笑
- You're shitting me. - No, I shit you not.
来吧 就这么定了
Come on, let's hit it.
你确定他说的是"舞厅"
Are you sure he said "dance club"?
你知道吗 我说的是普通话
You know, I was rocking Mandarin,
他说得是广东话 很明显这里面有误解了
he was rocking Cantonese something clearly got confused in the middle,
但是 塞翁失马 焉知福祸啊
but I say, boom goes the dynamite.
这也绝对是个惊喜 对吗
Happy accident, right?
带你们去座位吗
Show you to your table?
外面的世界很大很美好的 朋友
Great big world out there, my friend.
只要把头抬起来三公分
Just three inches up, I beg you.
好
Yeah.
有问题吗
Any questions?
我去 太深了
Holy shit, that's deep.
好了 我想我们跟着走就行了 走吧
All right, I think that's our cue. Here we go.
-好的 很棒 面对现实吧 -是的
- Okay. Great. Deal with it. - Yes.
-来吧 -这个 很不错
- Come on! - This is... this is good.
我是说 太劲爆了
I mean, it's totally cool.
很棒
It's great.
你还好吧 吓到了吗
You okay there, firecracker?
-什么 是的 完全 -好吧
- What? Yeah. Totally. - All right.
什么 这个 这是我的菜
What? This... this is my jam.
我是说 这是我的风格
I mean, this here is my shit.
不 我知道这是你的风格
No, look, I know this is your shit,
但是 如果你不想待在这
but look, if you don't want to be here,
我去叫那些男孩子们 我会拖着他们
I'll go grab those guys by their little boners, and we'll drag them,
回去到车上的
we'll all go back on the bus.
-是的 我们可以 -别 别 别 别那样
- Yeah, we can... - No, no, no, don't do that, don't do that.
只是
It's just,
我只是在书本上看过这些东西
I've only read about this stuff, okay?
克雷格列表网 暮光之城的同人小说"哼态"
Craigslist casual encounters. Twilight fan fiction. Hentai.
什么是"哼态"
What's Hentai?
日本的漫画书 那里面有女人被章鱼用触角干了
Japanese comic books where the women get penetrated by octopus tentacles.
听我说
Look,
只是
it's just...
我想像过任何 事情
I have imagined... everything.
只是 我从没做过
It's just I've... I've never done... anything.
嘿 听着 我们会替你保密的
Hey, listen, your secret's safe with us.
为什么呢 因为这是值得一试的
And for what it's worth,
你的想象力是这么的狂野
your imagination is so wild,
而现实如果不至于让你失望的话 也是不错的
reality's gonna be a breeze, if not a letdown.
谢谢
Thanks.
美女 随我去你的位置
Show you to your table, cutie?
快入座
Get in here!
快来 正是时候
Let's go! It's about time
-让我们队伍爽一晚 -享受美好的时光
- this group had a night. Let the good times roll!
干杯 这杯你的
Bingo...! Here you go!
-干尽了 友友 -我不能喝
- Bottoms up, YoYo. - Oh, I can't.
我不能
I can't.
什么 你够21岁了吧
What? You're 21, right?
是的 妈妈说酒精会麻醉大脑
Yeah, but my mom says alcohol numbs the brain.
听着 我不会说一杯龙舌兰酒
Look, I'm not saying a shot of tequila's
会让你立即充满自信
the first step on the journey to selfrespect,
我靠 或许这是正确的选择
but goddamn, maybe it's a step in the right direction.
或许吧
Maybe?
你作主吧
Your call.
就一杯
One shot.
-好家伙 -就一杯
- All right! Thataboy! - One shot!
-好啦 -干了
- Yeah! - Bang it, Yo!
-一杯见底 -就是这样 好样的
- Let's go, baby! - Yeah! That's it, baby!
敬这个永生难忘的夜晚
To the night you'll never remember!
大伙看 他快不行了
He's getting down, people!
再来一杯
One more!
看这边什么状况 准备好了吗
Look what we got cooking here. Ready?
这就是我说的交互时刻应用
Exchangeagram moment, bitches!
准备好你的第一次大腿舞了吗 叫兽
Ready for your first lap dance, professor?
你开什么玩笑 友友时刻准备着
Are you kidding? YoYo stays ready.
他的小♥弟♥弟♥早就严阵以待
That way, he doesn't have to get ready.
这位是薯粉妹妹
This is Tapioca.
她要成为一名牙科助理
She's studying to be a dental assistant.
享受吧
Enjoy!
这样的事经常发生
It happens all the time.
有人说是撸点低的问题
Some would say it's the point.
其实没什么问题
It's all good.
下一回多穿一条内♥裤♥就好了
You might want to double up on the underwear next time.
我必须告诉你
I got to tell you,
你重"起"时间真够惊人的
the reboot time is impressive.
一夜三次郎
Trifecta.
-干杯 兄弟 -干杯 干杯
- Cheers, bud. - Hey, cheers. Cheers.
不会吧
No way.
那个是你在谷歌♥教跳舞老师吗
Is that your dance teacher from back at Google?
去跟她聊聊
Go talk to her.
没错 是要寒暄几句
Yeah, for shizzle, you know,
我就这样过去跟她说
I just go up and I'm, like,
"小妞 想加入莱尔高♥潮♥俱乐部吗"
"Yo, you want to join the LyleHigh Club?"
莱尔 有时候最狂野的举动
You know, Lyle, sometimes the most radical move
就是做你自己
is just to be yourself.
我真的喜欢莱尔这个人
And I really like the real Lyle.
-真的 -真的
- Yeah? - Yeah.
去吧 你是全场最闪耀的
Go on, you're burning daylight.
咱上吧
Let's do this.
好的 没问题
Okay, good.
舞台上的你真棒
You were really good up there.
我是说 真是棒极了 我
I mean, that was amaz... I...
我是说 我没动坏的念头
Not in... not in, like, a sexual way.
好吧 有点坏坏的意思
Well, kind of in a sexual way.
我只想说 你真的很有才
It was... you're very talented.
我是要说 你与众不同
Everything you do is special, is what I'm saying.
我实在 太不好意思了
I'mI'm just... I'm so embarrassed.
什么 你不好意思 你在开玩笑吧
What? You're embar... Are you kidding?
这下我们打平了
Now we're even,
因为在上你课的时候跳舞
because dancing in your class at Google
是我这辈子干过最尴尬的事情
was one of the most embarrassing moments of m'life.
这样说你会好受点吗
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
其实我不特别记得
I don't remember anything specifically awful.
你一点也不记得
You don't remem... you don't...
那就是说我们没有打平啦
Well, then that means we're not even,
只有一种办法能解决这个困境
there's only one very unfortunate way to fix that.
好了 够了
Okay, yes, all right,
我肯定忘不了 你可以停了
that is burned in my memory. You can stop now.
要我停下来 除非你答应我
How about I stop if and only if...
什么
Yes?
我请你喝一杯
I can buy you a drink?
那太好了
I would love that.
-好吗 -好的
- Yeah? - Yeah.
数杯
Shots?
-对 数杯 -数杯
- Yes. Shots. - Shots.
我喜欢在谷歌♥教跳舞
I I love teaching at Google,
不过我只是兼♥职♥的 不够付学费
but it's only parttime, and it doesn't cover my tuition,
所以我要接更多活