捉鬼小精灵2（2008）

...在我和我女朋友幽会的时候可以看到 所以...
...on my Girls Gone Wild box set, so...
-真的不信 -真的
-Double dare? -Double dare.
妈的 看见了吗 真的 快看
-Oh. Fuck. Are you seeing this? Seriously. Watch.
我想她们敢
I think so.
-伙计们 -哦 嘿
-Guys? -Oh. Hey.
-我们要走了 -你们去哪儿
-We're out of here. -Where are you going?
回我们的地方
Back to our place
-喝一杯 -我和你们一起回去
for a drink. -I'll come with you.
不 留下 克里斯 你还有好多事要干
-No. Hang back. Chris. There's plenty for you to do here.
另外 这是妮可的时刻
Besides. This is Nicole's time.
坐下吧 哥们
Just have a seat. Man.
好样的
Attaboy.
看看这个
So check this out.
你知道盐水和血基本上是一种东西吗
Do you know that salt water and blood are basically the same thing?
真的
It's true.
法国生物学家在狗身上做了实验
There's a French biologist that did this experiment on a stray dog
大概是在世纪之交的时候
around the turn of the century.
他放干了狗的血 并用盐水替代
He drained all the blood out of the dog and replaced it with diluted seawater
所有人都以为狗死定了
and everybody thought that this dog was gonna die.
但它没有
Except the dog didn't.
失去的血再生了
What they found is that all the missing blood had regenerated.
盐水变成了血
The saltwater became blood.
此后 这条狗比以前更加活跃 精力旺盛
And after that. The dog was more alive and vibrant than it ever had been before.
这条狗很健康地活了很久
The dog went on to live a long and very healthy life.
敬长寿 克里斯
To long life. Chris.
我也试试这个
Let me try some of that.
我觉得你肯定不会喜欢的
-I don't really think you'd find it too much to your liking.
还是喝你的啤酒吧
You might wanna just stick with the beer.
你这个又长又无聊的故事想说明什么
So what exactly was the point of your very long and boring story. Jon?
基本上 他想说的就是
Basically. What he's trying to say is
我们是吸血鬼
we're vampires.
-好可怕 -不 但事实上
-Ooh. Scary. -No. But seriously
我们就是吸血鬼
we're vampires.
救命
Help me!
不 不 不
No. No. No.
不要 求求你
No. Please.
放我走吧
Let me go.
闭上你的臭嘴
Shut the fuck up.
不 不 不
No. No. No.
我太喜欢这女孩了 妈的 太喜欢了
I'm thinking I love this girl. Oh. Fuck. I love this girl.
吃啊
Do it.
吃啊
Do it!
跑啊 快点
Run. Go.
快点
Come on.
你完蛋了 兄弟
You're fucked up. Bro.
肖恩不会在这救你 我受够你了
Shane's not around to save your ass and I've had it with your attitude.
你以为我是在开玩笑么
Guess you think I'm kidding you. Bud
但我没开玩笑
but it ain't so.
肖恩现在在哪儿 混♥蛋♥
Where's Shane now. Bi? Fuck.
现在没棍子了 是吧
You ain't got no fucking stick now. Do you?
快点 结束这一切吧
Come on. Let's finish this.
嘿
Hey!
谁订了十字架
Who ordered the stake?
你能控制住自己吗
Are you cool?
是的 我能
Yeah. I'm cool.
你能吗
I said. Are you cool?
让我看看你的牙
Show me your teeth.
我说了 我能
I said I'm cool.
我说了 让我看看你的牙
And I said. Show me your teeth.
我能控制住
I am cool.
没错 看得出来
Yeah. I can see that.
没时间纠缠这些破事了 艾迪
We don't have time for this shit. Eddie.
咱们得赶回老巢 在我妹妹吸血之前救她出来
We have to get to the nest and get my sister before she feeds.
我也正想这么说
That's what I'm talking about.
我讨厌他妈的吸血鬼
I hate fucking vampires.
你在干什么
What are you doing. Man?
变圣水
Turning this into holy water.
-我是牧师 -你是牧师
-I'm a minister. -You're a minister?
对 我是在网上被任命的
Yup. I got ordained online.
我被国际在线牧师协会认证
I'm officially recognized by the International Association of Online Ministers
为尊敬的埃德加·弗洛格牧师 吸血鬼猎人
as the Honorable Reverend Edgar Frog. The vampire hunter.
你受过训练
Did you study for that?
没有 我在网上填了几张表
No. I went to the website. Filled out a couple forms
然后点击了"任命我"
and clicked "Ordain Me."
在战斗开始前 有几件事你得知道
Now. Before going into battle. There's a few things that you need to be briefed on.
首先 吸血鬼死的样子不好看
First of all. When a vampire buys it. It's never a pretty sight.
没有死法一样的吸血鬼
No two bloodsuckers go out the same way.
有些大喊大叫 有些一声不吭 有些爆♥炸♥ 有些内爆
Some yell and scream. Some go quietly. Some explode. Some implode
但他们全想拉你垫背
but all will try to take you with them.
至于猎鬼武器
As far as your arsenal of vamp artillery:
我们有十字架
We got stakes.
有木头的 有金属的
Got some wooden ones. Got some metal ones
还有碳纤维的
and some carbon-fibers.
我喜欢树脂的 又轻又好用
I like the resins. They're light and easy to handle.
老东西就是好 经典木制
That said. There's nothing as good as the old-fashioned. Classic wood job.
安全 结实 可靠
Safe. Sturdy. Reliable.
我们有空气推动榴弹发射器 用以发射圣水球
Next. We have my air-propelled-rocket grenade launcher for holy-water balloons.
这是我的玩意 你别碰它
This is my baby. Don't touch it.
我们还有一个这东西
We also have one of these.
-你知道怎么用吧 -是的 当然
-You know how to use this. Right? -Yeah. Totally.
-好的 -不 伙计 我不知道这是什么
-Okay. Good. -No. Dude. I have no idea what that is.
这是大蒜腊肠
It's a garlic bolo.
别管了 还是我拿这个吧
Never mind. I'll hold on to this one.
咱们去杀几个吸血鬼
Let's go kill some vampires.
他们知道我们在这
They know we're here.
准备好了吗
Are you ready?
-我想是的 -你想是的
-I guess so. -You guess so?
我确定
I know so.
救救我
Help me.
救救我
Help me.
闻到了吗
You smell that?
真菌与死亡的气息
Smells like fungus or death.
吸血鬼的味道
It's vampire BO.
什么
What?
-你到底在说什么 -跟着我就行了
-What the hell are you talking about? -Just follow me.
妮可 救救我
Nicole. Help me.
伊万
Evan.
我不能
I can't.
但你说已经准备好了
You said you were ready.
但我认识他
But I know him.
他是横亘在我们之间唯一的障碍 妮可
Well. He's the only thing that still stands between us. Nicole.
横亘在你与不朽之间的唯一障碍
The only thing that stands between you and immortality.
如果你想和我在一起
If you wanna be with me
如果你爱我
if you love me
就吸了他的血
you'll do this.
安静 你会惊醒死人了
Quiet. Man. You'll wake the dead.
克里斯
Chris.
克里斯
Chris.
克里斯
Chris.
妈的
Shit.
说好一起行动的 怎么不听呢
What part of "stay together" don't you understand?
有不对劲的味道
I smell ugly.
克里斯
Chris.
出来 克里斯
Come on. Chris.
克里斯不在这儿 艾迪
Chris isn't here. Eddie
你弟弟在
but your brother is.
你在哪
Where are you?
的确恶心
Yup. It's ugly.
失手
Missed.
狐狸逃不过好猎手
Pop goes the weasel.