捉鬼小精灵3（2010）

吸血鬼世界里最后的一个人类
Last man on Earth in a world full of vampires.
你要变成那样子吗
Is that really what you want to become?
我不渴 想我喝你得先杀了我
I'm not thirsty. You'll have to kill me first.
如果必要 我会的
I will, if necessary.
但是那会是一件羞耻的事
But that would be a shame...
尤其是在因为杀死X我欠了你人情的情况下
especially since I owe you a debt for killing X.
为什么你不自己杀了他
Why didn't you just kill him yourself?
一个父亲是不能杀死自己孩子的
A father can't murder his own children.
那会是很没有品位的
That would be in bad taste.
甚至是Dj X那样的混♥蛋♥
Even an impertinent little shit like DJ X.
我告诉过他不要把所有的粮食变成手下
I told him you can't turn all the cattle into cowboys...
手下再多没有吃的也只能饿死
you'll wind up with too many cowboys.
但是他不听
But he didn't listen.
现在 多亏了他该死的狂欢会
And now, thanks to his damned raves...
搞到四处游荡的吸血鬼过多
there are going to be far too many vampires roaming the Earth.
这才把你引来
That's where you come in.
让吸血鬼的数量保持适中
Keep the population down to a manageable size.
有足够喝的血液
Plenty of blood to drink.
每个都很开心
Everybody's happy.
准确的说
Precisely.
我想要你做的
Which is why I want you to
就是继续做你很擅长的这份工作
keep on doing what you're already so very good at.
追捕消灭吸血鬼
Hunting and killing vampires.
所以你想让我成为你的
So you want me to be your
专门的吸血杀手 是吗
own personal hemo-sucking hit man, is that it?
差不多
Crudely worded...
但是 这只是初步构想
but yes, that's the general idea.
那么什么让你确信
And what makes you think...
我将来不会杀了你呢
that I won't just kill you myself?
没有什么
Nothing.
除了你没有实在的理由
Except that you have no real reason.
埃德加 考虑一下
Think about it, Edgar.
你的兄弟已经是我们的一员
Your brother's already one of us.
你关心的人不想死的话只能服从于我
Everyone you care about is either dead or playing for my team.
你怎么说
What do you say?
我要说
I say...
你为什么不干♥你♥自己
why don't you go suck yourself?
艾伦 杀了你的兄弟 你会感觉好点
Alan, kill your brother. You'll feel better.
艾伦 不
Alan, no.
不要这样做
Don't do this.
你是我的兄弟
You're my brother.
你是弗洛格兄弟
You're a Frog Brother.
不要逼我伤害你
Don't make me hurt you.
我说了不要逼我伤害你
I told you not to make me hurt you.
埃德加 最后一次机会
Last chance, Edgar.
这他妈的是什么
What the fuck?
操你
Fuck you!
你还好吗
You okay?
是的
Yeah.
检查一下牙齿
Fang check.
消灭所有吸血鬼
Death to all vampires?
踩着他们的尸体前进
Maximum body count.
我们是无敌怪兽战士
We are awesome monster bashers.
-最卑鄙 -最邪恶
- The meanest. - The baddest.
够了
That's enough of that.
我以为你和你兄弟去海滩了
Hey. I thought you went to the beach with your brother?
没错 但是 他想多待会
I did, actually, but, uh, he wanted to stay out there longer.
他在那里时间太久了
He stays out much longer,
都要变成人肉干了
he's gonna turn into a human piece of beef jerky.
我想他只是想追回失去的时光
I guess he's making up for lost time.
-是的 -你知道吗
- Yeah. - Oh, guess what.
有人500美元
I sold your copy of
买♥♥了你那本灭绝吸血鬼第125期
Destroy All Vampires number 125 for 500 bucks.
-真的吗 -是的
- Yeah? - Yeah.
棒极了
That's great.
耳根能有一阵子不受银行唠叨了
That should keep the bank off my butt for a while.
佐伊 现在我有点事情要问你
Now, Zoe, there's something I need to ask you.
你怎么知道吸血鬼真的存在
How did you know vampires are real?
只是直觉
Just a hunch.
你正在读什么书
What are you reading?
我正在把这些书放进我的电子书里
Oh, I'm actually scanning the book into my Kindle.
我决定 你知道的
I decided, you know...
我也需要充实自己
I might as well educate myself
了解地下黑暗世界的种种
about all the possibilities of the dark underworld.
例如 你知道兽化人
For example, did you know that lycanthrope...
或者说女狼人吗 实际上女狼人
or female werewolves, she-wolves...
可以随时变身
actually can change anytime they want to?
不需要在满月的时候 这是一个谜
They don't have to do it under a full moon. That's a myth.
她们可以随时变身
They can turn anytime they want to.
她们有完全的控制力
They have complete control.
甚至在中午的时候也可以
They can do it in the middle of the day.
这是很有趣的理论
Now, that's an interesting theory.