约会之夜（2010）

他们不在家
They're not home. They're not home.
我们等着
We'll wait.
要等多久 霍尔布鲁克家的警♥察♥
For how long, Phil? The cops that were at Holbrooke's
马上就会来的
could be headed over here right now.
好吧 四楼
Okay. Fourth floor. Fourth floor.
你在干吗
What are you doing?
如果我们找不到三角号♥一家
If we can't find the Tripplehorns,
也许我们能找到他们的闪盘 到这儿来
maybe we can find their flash drive. Come here.
什么
What?
-我们行的 -穿成这样 好吧
-We can do this. -The one night I dress up. Okay.
来吧 好了吗 一二三上
Here we go. Okay, ready? One, two, three, go!
就那样 够上它
There you go. There you go. Reach for it.
这就是你
It's all you. It's all you.
-好了 -好了 我接住你了
-Okay. -Okay, I got you. I got you.
天哪 你鞋子上是什么啊
God, what was on your shoe?
亲爱的 我想是你干了的呕吐物
I think it's your dried barf, lover.
你做的每件事我都是穿着高跟鞋做的
Everything you're doing, I'm doing in heels.
我只希望你想想那个
I just want you to think about that.
你当然知道
You realize, of course,
这是我们第二次在晚上破门而入
that this is our second breaking and entering of the evening.
我们通过窗子 我们又犯罪了
We go through that window, we're officially repeat offenders.
我们的关系比室友更好
Better than roommates.
是的
Yeah.
他们用一支夏比笔刺穿了一个鸡块
They stabbed a chicken nugget with a Sharpie.
这些人是坏蛋
These are bad people.
你看看那儿 我看看这儿
Okay, you look over there. I'll look here.
-该死 菲尔 -嘘 怎么啦
-Damn it, Phil! -Shh. What?
-你为啥一个抽屉都没关 -对不起
-Why don't you ever close any drawers? -I'm sorry.
你从不关你打开的任何抽屉 从不
You never, ever, ever close any drawer you ever open. Ever!
-好吧 -从不
-Okay. -Ever!
天哪
Oh, God! God! God!
别动
Don't move.
-谁在那儿 -好吧现在快跑
-Who's there? -Okay, move now. Move now.
这不是看上去的那样
Oh, hi. This is not what it looks like.
是吗 看看这个 贱♥人♥ 砰
Yeah? Look at this, bitch! Boom!
我的脖子 他打中了我的脖子
Ah! my neck! he punched my neck!
天哪
Oh, my god!
-等等 停下 我可以解释 -是吗
-Wait! Stop! I can explain. -Oh, yeah?
-那就说吧淫♥妇♥ -你们到底在这儿干什么
-Then start talking, whore! -What the hell are you doing here?
好吧
Okay, okay, okay!
坐下 过去 你也是 过去
Sit down. Move. You, too. Move.
小心点
Careful.
好吧
All right.
好的 那么你一定是托马斯·费尔顿
All right. So you must be Thomas Felton.
人们喊我泰斯特
People call me Taste.
我打赌人们也喊你三角号♥
I bet people also call you Tripplehorn.
我是珍妮的忠粉
I'm a big Jeanne Tripplehorn fan.
是的 她是个好演员
Yes, she is a fine actress.
-这是谁 -我是维皮特
-Who's this? -I'm Whippit.
维皮特 像狗的名字吗
Whippet, like the dog?
不 就像你从鲜奶油罐头里允吸蛋白质
No. Like when you suck nitrous out of a whipped cream can.
好吧
Okay. Okay.
愚蠢的丑女
Stupid skank.
天哪 你到底有没有妈妈教的
Oh, my god. Do you have any contact with your mother at all?
是个好问题 我们想要干什么
That's a nice piece. What are we gonna do,
来个十步决斗吗
have a duel at 10 paces?
闭上你的脸
Hey, zip your face.
闭上我的脸吗 你说真的吗
Zip my face? Are you serious?
是的 他说闭上你的脸
Yeah, he said, "zip your face."
这就是你最牛的词儿
That's your best line?
那是你最牛逼的词儿吗
That's your best tough-guy line?
你听到我说的 闭上你的脸
You heard me. Zip your face.
雷蒙德·布尔为何不闭上你的阴♥道♥
Why don't you zip your vagina, Raymond Burr?
我不知道对此该如何反应
I have no idea how to respond to that.
-操你 -操♥我♥吗 操你
-F you! -f me? F you!
-操你 -操你伙计 你们在这儿干什么
-F you! -F you, man! What are you doing here?
操♥你♥妈♥
F you, mother, f her.
行了 你们想要什么
Okay. Okay! What do you want?
你知道你对我们都做了什么
You have no idea what you have done to us.
什么
What?
当你在饭店错过了预约
When you missed your reservation at Claw,
你就毁了我们的生活
you ruined our lives.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
我们没有错过任何事 你们这些笨蛋
We didn't miss anything, you dumbass.
我们看见两个暴徒 所以我们走了
We saw the two goons casing the place out, so we took off.
对于你们来说那是什么
Hey, and what is it to you?
你们是干什么的 预约的警♥察♥还是什么
What are you, the reservation police or something?
-是的 对你们来说那是什么呢 -是的
-Yeah. What's it to you? -Yeah.
当时我们没有订房♥ 所以用了你们的
As it so happens, we didn't have a reservation, so we took yours.
现在他们认为我们是你们
And now they think that we're you.
你们只是用了我们的房♥间吗 那是谁干的
You... you just took our reservation? Who does that?
是的 你们是什么人
Yeah. What kind of people are you?
谁在意呢 没什么大不了
Who cares? It's not a big deal!
天哪 得了吧
Oh, my god! Come on!
谁干的那事
Who does that?
等等 你们怎样找到我们的呢
Wait, how did you find us, anyway?
我从预约表上偷了你们的电♥话♥号♥码
I stole your number from the reservation list.
-真聪明 -谢谢
-That's smart. -Thank you.
你用了我们真实的号♥码订房♥吗
You used our real number to make that reservation?
不 我没有用家庭号♥码 用的手♥机♥
No. I didn't use the home number. I used the cell phone.
哇 真聪明
Wow, that's brilliant.
泰斯特 你真是该死的
Wow, Taste, you're just a goddamn
犯罪天才 是吗
criminal mastermind, aren't you?
这就是说我总是那么愚蠢 是吧
This is about how I'm an asshole all the time, huh?
你为何总是不相信我能度过难关呢
How you have no trust that I can pull things through.
-是的 -我为何就不能做对任何事呢
-Yeah! -How I can't do anything right?
-我买♥♥错了苏打水吗 -是的
-I buy the wrong soda? -Yeah.
-啤酒也不对 -我能听见伙计
-The wrong beer! -I hear you, man.
-错误的乳♥头♥夹 -好吧
-The wrong nipple clamps. -Well...
那些夹子弄伤了我
Those clamps hurt me.
你知道的 你回到家甚至都不看我
You know, and then you come home, and you don't even look at me.
我不得不好像乞求你跟我上♥床♥
I have to, like, beg you to have sex with me,
好像那是恩赐
like it's a gift!
以后别想后♥庭♥的事了
And forget about the anal!
-没后♥庭♥的事儿了 -已经忘了
-Forget about the anal! -It's forgotten.
如果我整晚工作后有点累的话对不起
I am sorry if I am a little tired after working all night
只要回家扑向你 给你跳个大腿舞
To just come home and jump on you and give you a free lap dance.
对不起
I am sorry! I was perfectly happy
我真的很喜欢脱衣服逢场作戏
stripping and tricking at the hippo.
它让我感觉自己很好
It made me feel good about myself!
我得了个勋章
I got a ribbon!
但是你不得不贪婪地从每个人那里
But, no, you had to go and get all greedy and start stealing
-偷每一样东西 -好了 够了
-everything from everyone! -Okay, okay, that's enough!
对不起我在做梦
Excuse me for dreaming!
好像我要把下半辈子
Like I want to spend the rest of my life
都花在卖♥♥我偷来的轮椅上似的
selling stolen wheelchairs!
我觉得你已经失去这的控制权了 菲尔
I feel like you're losing control of the room, Phil.
-那我的梦想呢 -行了 行了
- What about my dreams? - Okay, okay.
-那我呢 -别争了 别争了
- But what about me? - Stop arguing. Stop arguing.
都闭嘴别吵啦 闭嘴
Stop it. Shut it. Shut... everybody, shut the holes.
-都把嘴闭上 -安静 安静点儿
- Just shut the hole. - Quiet. Just be quiet.
听着 那几个打手跟着我们
Listen, listen. These goons are after us
是因为他们认为是我们拿走了那个闪存盘
because they think that we have a
可实际上是你们偷的
flash drive that you stole from them.
所以你们得去找他们 告诉他们
So you're gonna go to them and you're gonna tell them
你们才是真正的三角号♥夫妇
that you are the Tripplehorns.
等一下 贱♥人♥
Wait a second, bitch.
不许叫我贱♥人♥ 妓男
Don't call me a bitch, whore!
你是说那几个打手正在追踪你们
Are you telling me that these goons are tracking you right now?
你没听到我说的吗 妓男
Have you not heard a word I said, whore?