Monica: And I went down to the post office, and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civil War.
我今天去了邮局，寄来的是我订的录影带，是帮理查订的，有关南北战争的。他很喜欢看南北战争。
Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
莫妮卡，你要不要我们带你回家？
Monica: Uh, huh. Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away.
或者带我到遥远的银河去吧。
Ross: Women tell each other everything. Did you know that? Umm, yeah.
女人什么事都说。你知道吗？-嗯，是的。
Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamina, girth...
不，钱德，我是说全部的事！你喜欢的东西，她喜欢的东西技巧，精力，周长
Chandler: Girth? Why, why, why, wh-why, why, why, why would they do this?
周长？为什么？她们为何这样做？
Ross: Rachel says sharing's great and supposedly, you know, we ought to be doing it. You wanna?
瑞秋说分享的感觉很棒，而我们也应该这么做。你想要吗？
Chandler: We're not gonna talk about girth are we? Nooo! Yeah, ok. Yeah? Yeah! All right! You go first.
我们不会要讨论周长吧？-不。-好吧。-好吧？-好！你先吧。
Ross: Ok, ok, I'll go first. Ok.
好，好，我先说。-行。
Ross: So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies, and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thing...
有天晚上瑞秋和我在床上讨论彼此的性幻想我就形容了一个画面，星球大战里的
Chandler: Princess Leia in gold bikini. Yes!
莉亚公主和金色比基尼。-好！
Chandler: I know! Yes! Wow, well, that-that was easy. Ok, you- you go. Ok. Ok.
我知道！-这倒挺容易的好，换你了。-好。-好。
Chandler: Ok, well you know, you know when your in bed, with a woman.
好，当你跟一个女人在床上，正在亲热。
Ross: Hmph.
嗯。
Chandler: And, ah, you know, you're fooling around with her. And you get all these like, mental images in your brain, you know, like Elle MacPherson, or that girl at the Xerox place...
脑袋里突然出现一些疯狂的念头。就像超级名模埃勒麦克弗森，或是影印店的那个女孩。
Ross: With the belly button ring? Oh, muhawa!
穿了肚脐环的那个？哦！
Chandler: I know, And then all of a sudden your mom pops into your head. And you're like 'Mom, get outta here!'
我知道，但是突然之间，你忽然想到你♥妈。然后你就想 “妈，快走开啦！”
You know, but 'course, like, after that you can't possibly think of anything else, and you can't, you know, stop what you're doing.
但从那时起，你的脑袋里就只有你♥妈，而你正在做的事又不能停止。
So it's kind of like, you're, you know. You know...You don't know!
所以你就好像，你知道的，你知道的你不知道！
Ross: Your mom, you're telling me, you're telling me, about your mom, what is the matter with you?
你♥妈妈？你是说跟你♥妈一起？你究竟有什么毛病？
Chandler: You said...Ross: I said 'share' not 'scare'. Go sit over there.
你说 -我说要分享，不是吓人。你给我坐到那边去。
Janice: We're baack!
我们回来了！
Joey: Hey...
-嘿
Chandler: Hey, what are you guys doing together?
嘿，你们俩在一起干嘛？
Janice: Joey and Janice's DAY OF FUN! !
乔伊和珍妮丝的逍遥一日游！！
Chandler: Really. Yeah, yeah. We went to a Mets game, we got Chinese food, and, you know, I love this woman. You have got competition buddy.
真的吗？-我们去看纽约大都会的比赛，还吃了中国菜，你知道的，我爱这个女人你有竞争对手了，兄弟。
Janice: I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so. I'll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler.
我只是上来亲你一下，我得去接孩子了，所以。待会儿见，甜心你也是，钱德。
Chandler: You still can't stand her can you? I'm sorry man, I tried, I really did.
你还是受不了她，是吗？-抱歉，我已尽最大努力了。
Chandler: Well, you know, I appreciate you giving it a shot.
还是谢谢你的努力。
Joey: But, hey, look, you know, the good thing is, is that we spent the whole day together, and I survived, and what's even more amazing, so did she. It was bat day at Shea Stadium.
但是有一点可喜的是，我们整天在一起，而我还能存活。更了不起的是，她也还活着，因为今天是谢伊球场的“球棒”日。
Chandler: I guess that's something.
我想这还蛮了不起的。
Joey:Oh man, that's huge! Now, I know I can stand to be around her, which means I get to hang out with you, which is kinda the whole point, anyway.
天啊，这可是大事呢！现在我知道我可以待在她旁边，表示我可以和你们一起出去，反正这就是我的重点。
Chandler: Ok.
好吧。
Joey: Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran into Ross.
哦，嘿，钱德勒，我们在咖啡店停了一下，结果遇到罗斯。
Chandler: Oh God!
天啊！
Joey: Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I do it too.
希望这会让你好过点，我也会有这种想法。
Chandler: Really?
真的吗？
Joey: Oh yeah, I always picture your mom when I'm having sex.
对啊，当我在做♥爱♥时我都会想像你♥妈的样子。
Video: April Twelve, Eighteen hundred sixty one, 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon it is now under bombardment by...
1861年4月12日星期二上午4：30萨姆特堡的美国要塞遭到炮轰这场炮轰是由于。。。
Monica: Hey, Dad, what are you doing here?
嘿，爸，你怎么来了？
Mr. Geller: Well, it's your mother's bridge night so I thought that I'd come into the city for a little Monicuddle. Since when did you start smoking cigars?
你♥妈今晚打桥牌，所以我进城来看看小莫妮卡。你什么时候开始抽雪茄了？
Monica: I don't, I just, I just like the smell of them. So, uh, what are you really doing here Dad?
我没有，只是喜欢闻它的味道。你来这里真正的目的是什么？
Mr. Geller: Well, I just wanted to make sure that you are ok.
我只想确定一下你还好吧。
Monica: What makes you think that I might not be ok?
我为什么会不好呢？
Mr. Geller: I saw Richard.
我看到理查了。
Monica: Oh.
哦。
Mr. Geller: So, how are you doing?
所以，你还好吗？
Monica: I'm fine, just a little tired, but I'm ok. How-how's Richard doing?
我很好，我只是有点累，但我还好。理查怎么样了？
Mr. Geller: You don't wanna know.
你不会想知道的。
Monica: No, I-I really, really do.
不，我我真的，很想知道。
Mr. Geller: Well, he's doing terrible!
他的情况很糟！
Monica: Really? !
真的？！
Mr. Geller: It's worse than when he broke up with Barbara.
比他失去芭芭拉时还糟。
Monica: You're not just saying that are you? -Mr. Geller: No, the man is a mess.
你不是故意这么说的吧？-不，那个男人简直一团糟。
Monica: Was he crying?
他有没有哭？
Mr. Geller: No.
没有。
Monica: Well, do you think he was waiting 'til after you left, so he could cry?
你觉得他是否等你走后，才一个人开始哭？
Mr. Geller: Maybe.
或许吧。
Monica: I think so.
我想是的。
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your mom and me. You know after we graduated from college we broke up for a while.
-我想也是宝贝，感情这回事很难说，就像我跟你♥妈大学毕业后，我们曾分手一阵子。
It seems her father, your grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did.
她父亲，就是你祖父，似乎希望你♥妈跟他一样，到欧洲四处旅行。
Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However...
当然，他是为了山姆大叔，因为当时他也在猛轰德国的军用运输列车然而。。。
Rachel: Ok, here we go. I'm Jabba's prisoner, and you, have a really weird look on your face.
好吧，开始啰我是贾霸的囚犯，而你脸上的表情好怪。
What? Honey, what is it? Did I get it wrong? Did I get the hair wrong? What? Did you just picture it differently? What? What?
怎么了？甜心，有什么问题？我的头发不对吗？还是别的问题？跟你想像的不同，还是？
Ross: No, no it's, um, it's not you, um, it's um, it's...
不，不是你的问题，是
Mrs. Geller: Well what is it? Come on sweetie, your kinda like, freaking me out here.
怎么了？拜托，甜心，你快把我吓坏了。
Ross: I hate Chandler, the bastard ruined my life.
我恨钱德，那个混♥蛋毁了我的人生。