欢迎来到瑞典（2014）

他是我们的独子
He is our only child.
这也会是我们作为父母参加的唯一一场婚礼
And this is going to be our only wedding. As parents.
这也弥补了之前我们独自度过的
And this sort of makes up for all those Christmases
那些圣诞节
we spent alone.
不是只过了一个圣诞节吗
Hasn't it been only one Christmas?
没错 但是那简直太恐怖了
Yes, but that one was pretty horrible.
所以我们很感谢你们能给我们这个小礼物
So we appreciate this one little thing that you're giving us.
一个在世界上最伟大的国家
A chance to celebrate your wedding
举办你们婚礼的机会
in the greatest country in the world.
这也许是我们收到过的最棒的礼物
This is probably going to be the greatest gift
没有之一
that we'll ever get. Ever.
好了
Anyway,
你有什么要说的吗
you wanted to tell us something?
没有
No.
布鲁斯你有吗
Bruce?
刚才那是怎么回事
What just happened?
就是啊 我跟你说的没错吧
I know, I told you!
他们总是有能力得到他们想要的
They're amazing at getting what they want!
他们就像绝地武士似的有感应力
It's like they play Jedi mind tricks or something.
绝地武士
《星球大战》中的虚幻角色 拥有超自然感应力
维拉德基♥督♥教会
你看看这些啊
I mean, look at this.
都太传统了
Everything is just so traditional.
教堂啊 我们压根也不信教啊
I mean, a church? We're not even religious!
教堂其实不错
Oh, but churches can be nice.
传统一点其实也挺好
I mean, sometimes traditions are nice.
真的吗 有牧师的教堂婚礼吗
For real? A church wedding with a priest?
你真是那么想的吗
Is that really what you were thinking?
我其实还没仔细想过...
I mean, I actually haven't thought about it...
亲爱的 这根本不是我们的风格啊
Babe, this is not us!
我们得跟他们说清楚
I mean, we have to tell them.
好吗 想想办法
Okay, think of something.
好的
Okay.
我们可以说你♥爸♥爸病了
We could tell them your father is sick?
不 那可不好
No! That's terrible!
对 那样说不好 抱歉...
No. That is terrible, I'm sorry for...
居然想出这么个坏主意
bringing that up.
-他倒是确实心脏不太好 -没错
- He does have his heart problem. - He does.
所以我们并不是撒谎
I mean, so we wouldn't exactly be lying.
对 没错 这借口万无一失
Right, exactly. It's foolproof.
如果你说有人病了 他们也没法说什么
If you say someone's sick there's nothing they can say.
他们不会再具体问
They can't question it.
不会的 他们也不会问
No, they can't go
"你确定吗 病得严重吗"
"Are you sure? How sick is he?"
-这主意太好了 亲爱的 -搞定
- That's genius, honey. - Thank you. Boom.
帝国反击战成功
The Empire strikes back.
引自《星球大战》第5集片名《帝国反击战》
-这是光剑 -好吧
- That was a lightsaber. - Yep.
“光剑”《星球大战》中
绝地武士使用的主要武器
我们需要跟你和妈妈谈谈
Okay, we need to talk to you and Mom.
嘘
Shh-shh-shh-shh-shh...
你妈妈休息了 什么事 儿子
Your mother is resting. What is it, son?
-那我们等她醒了再说 -不行
- Okay, we should wait until she gets up. - Oh, no.
好吧 是这样
Okay, listen.
我们得跟你们谈谈婚礼的事
We have to talk to you about the wedding.
等一下
Before you do,
我本来不想告诉你们俩的
I didn't want to have to tell you two this,
但是现在我觉得必须得说了
but now is as good a time as any, I guess.
南希病了
Nancy is very sick.
你确定吗
Are you sure?
病得严重吗
How sick is she?
很严重
Very sick.
医生说剩下的时间只有几个月了
Doctor says it's only a matter of months.
无法确定她能撑到几时
There are no guarantees.
她可能都没法从这里
She probably wouldn't have been able
坚持到婚礼现场了
to make it here to the wedding anyway,
所以 谢谢你
so, thank you.
做出了正确决定
For making the right decision.
只是这太难了 仅此而已
It's just that it's hard, that's all.
听起来确实好难 好可怕
Sounds hard. And horrible.
是吧 布鲁斯
Right, Bruce?
妈妈病了
Mom is sick?
这也太糟糕了
I mean, this is awful.
你认真的吗
Are you serious right now?
-他明显是在撒谎啊 -什么
- He's obviously lying! - What?
他用了我们本来打算用的那招
He used the same trick on us that we were going to use on them.
你被骗了 布鲁斯
You're being played, Bruce.
他们太厉害了
Oh, they are so good!
他们怎么可以这样玩弄我的感情
How dare they play with my emotions like that?
我猜我妈压根都没生病
I guess my mother's not even sick!
如果他是在撒谎我反而应该高兴
So if he's lying I'm actually happy.
不过要是他在撒谎我也很生气
But if he's lying I'm also so mad.
-就是 太低级了 -没错
- Yeah, I know, it's low. - Yes.
-真过分 -就是
- It's outrageous. - Yes!
-还假装生病 -可不是
- Pretending to be sick? - I know.
-真受不了 -是啊
- That's disgusting. - It is!
虽然本来我们也打算这么做
Although technically we were going to do the same thing.
是 不过我们...
Yeah, but we are...
这跟我们不一样
Well, it's different for us.
-没错 -因为...
- Yes. - Cause...
-反正就是不一样 -没错
- Well it just is. - It is.
对
Yes.
我刚才睡得特别香
I just had the best nap.
妈妈 我们能跟你谈谈吗
Okay, Mom. Can we talk with you for a second?
当然 小布布 什么事啊
Well sure, Brucie, what is it?
爸爸说你生病了
Uh, Dad said that you were sick.
这件事啊
Oh, that.
是的 没错
Well, yeah, it's true.
那你得的是什么病呢
Okay, what type of sickness are we talking about?
我来 我来开门
I got it, I'll get it.
帮个忙 布鲁斯
You know what, do me a favour Bruce.
我不想讨论这个
I don't want to think about it.
-今晚实在不想谈这个 -好
- Just for tonight. - Yeah.
不说了 好吗
Let's not talk about it, all right?
看起来他们已经串通好了
Well, looks like they got their story straight.
天啊 你妈妈真的病了
Oh my God, your Mom is sick!
真的吗
She is?
有人还想要土豆慕斯吗
Okay, anyone want more potato mousse?
里面有鹿肉吗
Is there moose in there?
我还真没尝出来鹿肉味道
I did not taste the moose in there, really.
土豆泥 是说土豆泥
Mashed potatoes. Mashed.
不用了 谢谢 非常好吃
Oh, well no thank you. It was delicious, though.
好的
Okay.
在瑞典现在是应该
Now is the time when we in Sweden
感谢鸡的时候了
say thank you to the cock.
什么
What?
厨师 是厨师
It's cook. Cook.
不好意思 说的是厨师
Sorry, it's cook.
瑞典语里鸡和厨师发音很像
Uh, "Cock" means cook in Swedish.
抱歉 是厨师
Oh, sorry. Cook.
谢谢 爱玛
Thank you, Emma.
谢谢 爱玛
Thank you, Emma.
谢谢
Thank you!
好了 韦恩
Okay, Wayne.
让我们收拾桌子刷碗吧
Let's clear the table and do the dishes.
什么呀...
Yeah, ri...
你没开玩笑啊
You're serious.
是啊
Uh... yes.
给你 亲爱的 谢谢
Here you go, honey. Thank you.
真应该拍照记录下这一刻
I want a picture of that.
-南希 来点红酒吗 -来点吧
- Nancy, wine? - Please!