欢迎来到瑞典（2014）

我什么都试过了
-要我帮你吗 -怎么帮
我有个同事想把他的房♥子租出去
我把他的号♥码给你
第一项任务完成 我找到房♥子了
我跟你说了我行的吧
打脸了吧
In your face!
谁是你♥爸♥比 谁是你♥爸♥比
Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy?
谁是你♥爸♥比 谁是你♥爸♥比
Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy?
这个臭脾气的女人在看我们亲亲
你今天做了什么 布鲁斯
So what are you up to today, Bruce?
我们在滑雪呢
Uh, actually we're skiing.
你不会相信的
Hey, you're not going to believe this,
但这边的人觉得滑雪是项体育运动
but over here they think that's a sport.
不是吧
No way.
是吧 简直不可思议 对吧
I know! It's unbelievable, right?
滑雪不就是穿着长长的鞋子在雪地里走么
Skiing is like walking on long shoes in the snow.
他们觉得滑雪是项体育运动 太好笑了
That's hilarious that they think skiing is a sport.
你定居的国家可真是神奇 布鲁斯
You live in a very strange country, Bruce.
神奇吧 但这里真的特别美
I know, strange, but it's actually pretty beautiful.
你们真的应该在冬天的时候来看看
You guys should really come visit in the winter sometime.
-我们会的 -明年冬天好了
- Oh, we will. - Yeah, maybe next winter,
如果你们想安排次旅行或者...
if you guys want to book a trip or something...
周五就去
On Friday.
-什么 -是的 我们周五就去了
- What? - Yes, we are coming on Friday.
-这周五 -是的
- This Friday? - Yes!
你跟爱玛为了婚礼忙得团团转 不是吗
I mean, you and Emma are so busy planning the wedding, right?
所以我跟你♥爸♥要过去
And so me and Dad are just going to come over.
我们可以去帮帮忙 帮你们安排安排
We'll help out and we'll just plan everything for you,
确保万无一失
make sure everything turns out right.
惊喜吧
Big surprise, huh?
确实...
Yeahh...
布鲁斯 我真希望现在就能看见你
Oh, Brucie, I wish I could see your face right now.
这周五吗
This Friday?
是的 就这周五
Yeah, this Friday.
他们已经订好机票了
And they've already booked their tickets.
假如说
So hypothetically,
如果你想把别人的机票退了 你会怎么办
if you want to cancel someone else's ticket, how would you do it?
你知道她还说了什么吗
You know what else she said?
滑雪不是项体育运动
Skiing is not a sport.
好吧 就这么定了是吧
Oh well, I guess it's settled then.
就是项娱乐活动
Yeah, it's an activity.
我已经掌握了
And I just mastered it.
-什么 -我已经掌握滑雪的技巧了
- What? - I just mastered the fine activity of skiing.
你已经掌握滑雪的技巧了
You just mastered the fine activity of skiing?
-我想是吧 -如果你愿意的话
- Yeah, I think so. - We have time for one more run
-我们还可以再滑一圈 -我也想啊
- if you want to. - I wish I could,
但滑雪区已经关了
but the slope's already closed.
儿童滑雪区是关了
The kids' slope, yes.
我真的很想去
I would, I certainly would,
但我滑雪滑得全身酸痛
but, um, I'm sore from all this advanced skiing.
你可以跟我去成人滑雪区
Come on, you can go with me in the big slope
反正你已经完全掌握滑雪的技巧了
now that you've totally mastered skiing.
我只是想说
Listen, all I'm saying is
滑雪没我想的那么难
it's not as hard as I thought it was going to be.
好吗 他们说我是最顶尖的学生
Okay? They said I was one of their best students.
是的 但其他学生都是小孩 亲爱的
Yeah, but the other students were kids, honey.
来吧 我只想看看你的成果
Come on, I just want to see how good you've become.
首先 你这里沾到什么东西了
First, you have something here.
你真容易受骗
You're so gullible.
听着 宝贝 我爱你
Listen, babe, I love you,
你知道的 对吧
you know that, right?
我们忘记这些吧
Let's just forget about this.
我们进去
We'll go back inside,
-又来了 -把这些都忘了...
- It's on. - Forget this ever hap...
什么又来了 我没有...
What is on? I don't...
亲爱的 你在这
我到处找你
请给我两杯热绍特[烈酒上加咖啡和奶油]
抱歉 我抱怨你的鸡蛋三明治
你做了三明治 真的很贴心
我怀念孩子们小的时候
我们俩总腻在一起
那时候我们怀念初次相遇的时候
怀念不用管孩子不用照料房♥子的日子
是啊 那时候我们好傻
十年里我们都在怀念那些
所以 别惆怅了
没错 像平常一样
亲爱的 你没有点喝的吗
你在干什么
What are you doing?
热身 热身很重要
I'm warming up. It's important to warm up.
好吧 那滑吧
Okay. So let's go.
等一下不行吗
Hey, can't we just wait a bit?
-为什么 -知道吗
- Why? - Okay, you know what?
也许你是对的 好吗
Maybe you were right, all right?
也许美国人有夸大的倾向 吹点牛
Maybe Americans tend to over-exaggerate a bit and brag a bit,
但你们瑞典人正相反 那样更糟
but you Swedes, you do the opposite. That's even worse.
你说你滑得不好
Okay? You said you weren't good at skiing.
但你滑得很好 超好
You're great at skiing. You're super good.
你应该做一本自己的剪贴薄
You should have your own friggin' scrapbook.
我知道 来比比吧
I know! So let's race.
-一 二 三 -我不行
- One, two, three... - I can't!
我不行 好吗 不行
I can't, okay? I can't!
太快了 而且站在这么高我好怕
It's too steep and I'm freaking out up here!
宝贝 宝贝 放松点 好吗
Honey, honey, relax, okay?
我开玩笑的
I'm just joking.
其实我很惊讶
I'm actually really surprised
你能站在山顶
you even made it to the top.
我为你骄傲
Okay, I'm proud of you.
宝贝 我爱你 我会帮你滑下去的
Babe, I love you. I'll help you down.
好吗 亲亲我
Okay? Give me a kiss.
这个我能做到
That I can do.
安尼娅
Anja?
安尼娅
Anja!
天呐
Oh, God.
这简直 帅呆了
你觉得怎么样古斯塔的狗
What do you say, Gustaf's Dog?
古斯塔的狗
Gustaf's Dog?
古斯塔的狗
Gustaf's Dog!
你干了什么
What have you done?
在波斯地毯上
On the Persian rug?
我是说 这就像是在雪上行走
I mean, it's just like walking on snow.
这不是运动
You know? It's not a sport.
球都没有
There's no ball.
有球才算运动
Sport has to have a ball.
你是干什么的
So what is it that you do?
我是滑雪运动员
Uh, I'm a professional skier.
有时候我说话不经大脑
Yeah, sometimes I speak before I think.
你在这里
There you are.
-你脸上有... -这个不好笑
- Hi. Oh, you got stuff... - Not funny.
-不不 -不好笑
- No, no... - Not funny.
天啊 是安尼娅·帕尔松
-你好 -你好 记得我吗
亲爱的 你那边脸上沾了东西
Honey, you have something on the side of your face...
-别这样 这次是真的 -现在不是时候
- Stop it, please. It's for real this time. - Not now!
艾玛·维克 小时候我们曾比赛滑雪 我赢了
我参加的比赛太多了
所以你不记得我了 对我的脸没印象了
宝贝 你这里沾到了...
Honey, you have something.
-现在不是时候 好吗 -我没说谎...
- Not now, okay? - I'm not...
-我把你落下好长一段距离 -干得好
我♥干♥得确实好
-幸会 我得走了 -保重 安尼娅·帕尔松
天啊 她可真是个败军之将
Oh my God, what a sore loser she is.
宝贝 你满脸都是...
Honey, you have stuff all over...
-这不好玩 好吗 -满脸都是...
- It's not funny, okay? - It's all over your f...
-得了 -好吧 你自己确认一下
- Come on. - Okay, fine, do it yourself.
你自己摸一下
Just... touch it yourself.
天啊
Oh, my God.
-我满脸都是鼻涕 -我
- I have snot all over my face. - I...
布鲁斯 你怎么不告诉我
Bruce, why didn't you tell me?
我试了十次想告诉你
I tried to tell you, like, ten times.
现在安尼娅会觉得我是超烦人的鼻涕脸对手
Now Anja thinks I'm some super competitive, nagging snot-face!
难道不是吗
Is there any part of that that's not true?